The Source

by J B Stilwell

  His jaw ticks as he stares at me. Suddenly his fists slam against the top of the island. “That is why this project is so important to me. That is why it’s so hard for me to see footage of vampires dying in the sun.” He grabs my shoulders, his fingers digging into my skin. “And that is why I don’t give a FUCK about what happens to Thalia.”

  I can feel myself shrinking in his grip as he practically foams at the mouth, saliva wetting his lips as his eyes dart all around my face. I hold my breath, waiting for him to hurt me in some way. Like a light switch has been flipped, the storm in his eyes calms. He drops his hands from me and storms out of the suite.

  I let out the breath that I was holding and clutch my chest. Feeling like I am going to hyperventilate I go to the table to sit down, holding myself as if I am chilled to the bone with everything I had just heard and felt. I know that I can’t let Rick’s personal tragedy distract me so much that I can’t concentrate on work, but it will be difficult. Part of me wants to support him. Another part of me wants to run screaming in the other direction. I like Rick well enough, but his anger scares me. It is probably best for me to be cautious around him, just for my own safety. Or at least for my own sanity.

  Once I calm myself I return to the center island to begin preparing the slides for the microscope. The suite door opens and Ms. Montgomery enters, walking toward me with a purpose. She lays the portable video camera with an USB cable on the island. “Here is the footage from yesterday.” She just stands there and looks at me.

  “Thanks,” I half-whisper.

  She looks up to the ceiling, taking a deep breath. “Are you okay?”

  I look at her. “Excuse me?”

  She gazes at me, her face completely blank of emotion. “I saw what happened. Are you okay?”

  I slowly nod. “Yeah. But I’m surprised that you’re asking.”

  She straightens her blouse. “I have a vested interest in this project being successful. Everyone must be at their best.”

  “Your sympathy is reassuring.” I briefly smile at her.

  She just looks at me. I shrug. “It’s been very difficult for me interacting on such an intimate level with a vampire,” I say.

  She puts her shoulders back and stands straighter. “I will return to the observation room.” And just like that, I am alone again.

  Vampires and the humans that care for them. The emotional swaying back and forth makes me feel trapped in a paranormal pendulum, constantly moving. No wonder I constantly feel like I have butterflies in my stomach. I’m suffering from emotion sickness.

  I turn my head side-to-side as I start gathering more supplies, such as glass slides, a red marker, an eyedropper and tweezers. I pick up the specimen box that contains the remnants of the finger and built-up condensation. I carefully open it and use the eyedropper to collect some of the fluid and place it on a slide. I mark the slide with a red one and record on a log sheet the contents of slide one. I do the same with a sample from that container and the other in which the finger had been in direct sunlight. I think it would be appropriate to compare the cells from the two specimens to note any differences.

  Once I had the slides prepared and logged, I take the specimen boxes back to the storage cabinet. When I turn back around, Rick is there.

  I jump, squealing. “Jesus!” Placing my hand against my racing heart. “What was that you said about vampires getting startled, too?”

  He has the decency to look embarrassed with an edge of concern. “I’m sorry. Sometimes I forget that my stealthy abilities are heightened after feeding.”

  I take a step back trying not to show any level of disgust on my face. “Well, I hope that you’re in a better mood now,” I say.

  He rubs his hand against his mouth. “Look. The last thing that I wanted to do was to frighten you. I do have a hard time controlling my emotions when I think of certain things.”

  “You think?” I goad him.

  He steps closer and I try not to shrink away from him. “Emma, I enjoy having you as a partner on this project. Even through our bantering, I’ve had nothing but the utmost respect for you and your knowledge. To be honest, I even feel a certain protectiveness of you. That's why I always make it a point to leave before my passion gets the best of me."

  He searches my face as if he were trying to determine if I understood. Then he drops the bomb on me. "And it's why I talked to Tucker that day in the cafeteria."

  Completely shocked, I scowl. "You what? What do you mean you talked to Tucker? You talked to him about what?"

  He holds my gaze even with my blood pressure rising. "You had mentioned in passing that you had some difficulties with someone named Tucker. When I learned that the young man in the cafeteria was named Tucker, I stopped by his table before I visited Rita."

  "What did you say to him?" I ask in horror.

  "Well, I didn't know specifics. I just alluded that you had mentioned the difficulties with him and Tucker did the rest. He told me about his feelings for you and how he thought maybe he had scared you off. I told him that I didn't want to hear about any more difficulties where you are concerned."

  I take a step toward him, slightly trembling in my own anger, "Why did you do that? You had no right!"

  "Like I said, I feel somewhat protective of you. I didn't like the idea of someone causing you trouble, much less a man." He says the last part under his breath. Or at least that's what I think he said. I turn my head back and forth trying to figure out if I had heard him correctly. "You shouldn't have to feel uncomfortable," he continues.

  Feeling confused, angry and ambivalent by all that he has said, I drop my arms to my sides as if I am giving up. Too many mixed emotions sprinkled with mixed messages is making my head spin. I feel dizzy from his intended act of chivalry.

  "I don't know what to say, Rick. I don't need you fighting my battles." Want was another story.

  He nods. "I know that you are quite capable of taking care of yourself. I just wanted to make sure that Tucker didn't get any other ideas that might scare you."

  I rub my hands over my eyes trying to subtly hide any indication of tears before I say, "As much as I don't like it, I need to deal with this myself. With you saying something to him, he's just going to avoid doing or saying anything while you're around. What about when you're not around?"

  "There are ways to convince a person that are permanent," he responds.

  I step to the side, away from him. "Now you're the one scaring me." I start to walk back to the center island. With lightning speed he is around me and standing in front of the microscope.

  "What the hell? How did you do that?"

  "Another vampire perk is being significantly faster than our human counterparts," he explains.

  "Lovely," I muse, "now can you move so I can begin viewing the slides."

  He blocks my reach of the microscope. "You know, you don't have to be like this."

  "Be like what?" I ask.

  "Being the one who always has to take care of everything."

  I snort. "Yes, I do because no one else is going to do it."

  He leans against the counter with a wispy look in his eyes. "Wow. You have some serious trust issues."

  "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I ask.

  "Well, you didn't want to ask Sarah for help. You didn't want to tell me about Tucker. Now you're upset because you found out that I went ahead and talked to Tucker on your behalf." He shakes his head. "You don't have to do it all."

  I grit my teeth. "Fine. Okay. You got me. Now I trust you to get serious about working on the project. Is that good enough for you?"

  He grins. "Nice try at deflecting the attention away from you."

  Groaning in utter frustration I exclaim, "If you weren't a vampire capable of snapping me like a twig, I would smack the grin right off your face!"

  He nods calmly, his grin fading. "There it is."

  Confused I look around. "There is what?"

  He takes my hand. I try to pull away from him
only to be caught in his arms. My brow furrowed, I wiggle against him as his grip becomes firmer, contrasting the gentler look on his face. "When something upsets you beyond reason, even you, Emma Burcham, can be provoked into violence. That's what happened with me. When watching the videos and when talking about Serenity. But I controlled it because I didn't want to hurt you." He brushes the back of his hand against my cheek, searching my eyes, "You don't have to be scared of me."

  I turn my head, looking away from him, suddenly feeling completely foolish and a little bit excited. I turn back to him. "Okay, Rick. I won't be scared of you because I trust that you won't hurt me."

  He runs his hands up and down my arms as he lets go of me. A soft smile slowly turns the corners of his lips up. "That's a start."

  I take a step back, overwhelmingly aware of his fingertips slowly brushing against my skin, tickling the hairs on my arms and warming me to the core. I turn toward the island trying to get my mind back on track. "I've already prepared the slides and have logged everything. Now all we need to do is look at them and assess how the sunlight impacted the tissue."

  He smiles more broadly as he walks around to the other side, giving me a wide berth. He picks up the pen and readies himself to be our note-taker. I look at him and inhale deeply. I pick up the first slide and put it under the lens of the microscope. I carefully position my eye over the microscope. After a few moments of adjusting the lens I say, "This appears to be nothing more than water with slight traces of sodium crystals. There also appears to be some traces of blood."

  "Where did it come from?" Rick asks.

  "I kept one of the fingers in the container when I set it in the sun, just to see if there was any difference in impact compared with the finger that was set in direct sunlight."

  He nods. "Makes sense."

  I exhale rather forcefully while removing the first slide. "It appears to be nothing more than a vampire sweat-like residue along with blood spatter. Which would fall in line with the theory that vampires experience an accelerated form of dehydration. Yet, the question is why is there any blood spatter at all? Why didn’t it all dehydrate?"

  I pick up the second slide and put it under the scope. I begin looking through the lens as Rick is scribbling notes on the log. I suddenly stand up straight.

  "What's wrong?"

  "It just doesn't seem right," I respond. "I would expect the cells to be more damaged than this if it were dehydration. They look like they're just damaged, rather than completely dried up and lifeless."

  "May I?" he asks as he moves forward to look at the slide. "Hhhmmm. Maybe it's just a delayed response since the specimen was encased in plastic."

  "Possibly. But part of the damage appears to be a warping of the cells. Maybe not all of the cells dehydrated and some only partially dried up. Still, in those cells, the warping isn’t consistent with dehydration."

  I maneuver him out of the way so I can look at the third slide. "Now that's what I was expecting. Some of the cells are so shrunken and shriveled they look more like squiggly lines." I look up, staring off into the distance while thinking about whether or not a delayed reaction is a good enough explanation for me. I tap my fingers against the top of the island. "Another experiment," is all I say before I start walking back to the storage cabinet.

  "For what?" he asks.

  I turn around as a tingling sensation of foreboding creeps all over my skin. "If we're talking about dehydration, then rehydration is possible."

  He chuckles. "I don't think we need to fear soggy vampire parts."

  I step toward him, almost excited at the direction my thoughts are going. "What if it's more than that? With a vampire's healing ability and resistance to most things fatal, what if rehydration actually had the effect of re-animation?"

  Laughing loudly he says, "Are you serious? If that were the case vampires would have taken advantage of that a long time ago."

  I step to the side of the island, leaning against it, inclining my body toward him. "Only if they knew. Think about it. What usually happens when a vampire is caught in the sunlight?"

  Smiling broadly at me while listening, his smile slowly begins to fade as he thinks about what I have said. "The remains usually get scattered in some way. Either by the wind, force of the exposure - almost like an eruption - or by the person who did the deed."

  Nodding I say, "Many people believe that the effects are caused by the vampires catching on fire. If people believe this, then why would anyone even think to gather the remains and rehydrate them? Can you imagine the implications?"

  He looks at the table then back up to me. You can visibly see him considering my words. "Can you imagine what some vampires would try to do if that were the case?"

  I lean back. "I hope to God I'm wrong."

  Chapter 16

  Using the tweezers and eyedropper, I place a piece of the somewhat dehydrated tissue on a slide. I look at Rick, take a deep breath then put the slide under the lens. After viewing the slide I look up and say, "Much of the same with the previous slide. The cells just look damaged rather than looking completely dehydrated." He nods and writes some notes as I remove the slide and use the eyedropper to put a drop of condensation on the tissue. After allowing a few moments for the fluid to saturate the tissue, I place the slide back under the microscope. I look through the lens trying to determine if there is any significant change that would indicate that the tissue is coming back from the dead as it were. I stand straight and shake my head. "From the looks of it, the cells just look more healthy, but no indication that reanimation would be possible."

  Rick moves in close so that he can view the sample. Looking up he nods and says, "Just looks like what you would expect in rehydrating any material." He leans against the island with a curious look on his face. "Unless..." he begins, letting his voice drift off to an unknown conclusion.

  "Unless what?" I ask.

  His mouth opens and closes in a manner that reminds me of a blowfish before he says, "Unless blood would make a difference."

  My eyes narrow. "What do you mean unless blood would make a difference?"

  "Well," shrugging one shoulder, "blood makes ALL the difference to a vampire. It's what we live on. It just makes me wonder if adding human blood to the equation would have any impact on the tissue."

  I grit my teeth, pressing my lips together in a thin line before I say, "As much as I would love to help in that regard, I've not seen any sterile instruments that I would use to extract any of my blood. Besides, I thought it could be any blood, not necessarily human blood?"

  “You would support killing a rabbit or laboratory rat for this when you’re concerned about the way a criminal vampire was treated?” he asks.

  I scrunch my face up in distaste. “Point taken. Still doesn’t help the fact that we don’t have anything sterile to draw my blood.”

  Rick quickly goes to one of the cabinets. He returns to the center island with what looks like a diabetic care set for the morbidly curious. The set includes stick instruments, sterile strips, a syringe, test tubes, plastic tubing and shot glasses. I stare at the items and ask, "What the hell?"

  "Don't look so shocked," he says. "These are common items that not only could be used in scientific research, but could be beneficial for vampires who have to spend significant amounts of time away from their donors or the admins."

  "The admins?" I ask.

  "The admins are basically surrogate donors. That's what I'm doing when I need to see Rita. I'm feeding."

  I look away. "Okay, on some level I knew that, but I was making myself comfortable in denial by the fact that no one had come out and said it."

  He smiles at me. "Sorry to destroy the illusion." With a more serious, concerned look on his face he says, "Are you sure that you're willing to do this? We could get one of the admins to help us out."

  I ponder the offer for a few moments while simultaneously thinking about what I had already done and what I had seen happen to Thalia all for the sake of this project
. I feel a deep need to go forward without involving anyone else. To stop at this point would be like admitting that I knew that what we are doing is wrong. If I start down that path, I would leave the project completely, which I don’t want to do.

  I nod my assent. "I'll do it."

  I remove the slide from the microscope and set it on the top of the island. I then proceed to insert one of the lancets into the sticking instrument. Rick watches me intently before saying, "You do this so flawlessly, like you have done it before."

  "The unfortunate expertise of growing up in a family with multiple diabetics. You can learn a lot from just watching."

  "Indeed you can," he says while smiling at me.

  I give him a blank look before I hold the index finger of my left hand out in preparation for quick, stabbing pain. "Here goes," I say. I place the sticking instrument to the side of my finger and press the button, slightly jerking when the sharp tip strikes my flesh. Blood begins to well around the small wound. I place my finger over the specimen slide and begin to gently milk the tip so that more blood would flow into a generous drop onto the damaged tissue. Once the specimen is covered in my life source, I quickly put my finger in my mouth, sucking at the wound.

  Rick raises his eyebrows at me. "So it appears that you do have a touch of the vampire in you."

  I pull my finger from my mouth. "No, that's just a natural reaction from decades of habit. Now, if I would suck someone else's finger, that would make me like a vampire."

  Rick looks longingly at my finger. His gaze rises to meet my eyes. "You have no idea." He grins as if his thoughts were creating a world where my fingers were his appetizers. I don’t even want to think about the main course. I quickly place my hand in my pocket. "Okay, let's see if there is any change."