by Jeff Kinney
they scooped up their kids and left in a HURRY.
187
So that was the end of the open house, and we
didn’t get a SINGLE offer.
At dinner tonight, everyone was kind of bummed
out. But, while we were doing the dishes, there
was a knock on the front door.
It was a couple from out of town. They said they
hadn’t been able to make it to the open house in
time. So Mom invited them in to show them around.
They seemed pretty IMPRESSED, and the lady
said EXACTLY what Mom wanted to hear.
And, believe it or not, they made an offer right
on the spot.
188
Saturday
I knew I was gonna have to tell Rowley we were
selling our house, but I didn’t want a repeat of
what happened the LAST time we talked about it.
I came up with an idea for how to handle it
THIS time around. There’s a Preston Platypus
book on this EXACT subject, and I figured it
was the PERFECT way to get Rowley used to
the idea of me moving. So I took the book with
me to his house this afternoon.
189
It felt a little AWKWARD reading a story to
Rowley. But I think he’s USED to having books
read to him, so he made himself comfortable.
I don’t really think the message of the book
was getting THROUGH to Rowley, though. And
the story kind of made me MAD, anyway. It
was about how Preston Platypus has a best friend
named Pelican Pete, and they do EVERYTHING
together.
But then one day Pelican Pete says he’s MOVING,
and Preston Platypus is sad. And I was FINE
with the story up to that point.
190
Then Preston’s mom tells him he’ll make NEW
friends after Pete moves, and everything will work
out for the best. Sure enough, by the end of the
book, that’s EXACTLY what happens.
So basically Preston Platypus forgets about Pelican
Pete, and all their years of friendship don’t mean
a THING. And we never find out what happens
to Pelican Pete or if he’s happy in HIS new
neighbourhood.
191
I thought about writing an angry letter to
whoever WROTE this garbage. But of course
Rowley LIKED the story, and he wanted me to
read him ANOTHER one.
I decided to just stop dancing around the issue
and tell Rowley what was REALLY going on. And
the second I did I REGRETTED it.
I told Rowley to try not to get too worked up
because it wasn’t a done deal yet. But nothing I
said made any difference.
I had to tell Rowley that if he was gonna be so
DRAMATIC I was going HOME.
192
So then Rowley promised he’d keep himself
together, and he DID, but just BARELY.
Maybe it was a mistake telling Rowley about ANY
of this. I probably should’ve sent him a postcard
AFTER I moved, because that would’ve been a lot
easier on BOTH of us.
Wednesday
The owners of the house with the pool accepted
our offer, so I guess this is really HAPPENING.
The people who are buying OUR place had a home
survey done over the weekend, and they found a
few things we’re gonna have to fix before they’ll
buy the house. The most SERIOUS issue was
a problem with the ceiling underneath Mom and
Dad’s shower.
193
Apparently that clogged drain was a bigger
problem than we THOUGHT. The floorboards
under the bathroom tiles were totally rotten, so
now we’re gonna have to REPLACE them.
We’re lucky nothing TERRIBLE ever happened.
Because I can think of things even worse than the
GROUT.
194
The other thing the buyers want us to do is get
rid of the HOT TUB, because they have young
kids and they’re worried about SAFETY. And I’m
100% with them on THAT one.
Now I know for SURE that we’re moving, I
have a TOTALLY different attitude to school.
Since it’s almost summer, I asked Mom if I could
SKIP classes for the rest of the year.
But she said if I don’t go to school they could
throw her and Dad in JAIL. I thought about
whether or not that would be WORTH it, but I
decided I could just suck it up for a little while
longer.
195
I realized that next year I won’t be going to
school with these kids, and that’s what gave me
the courage to finally tell Becky Anton that I
LIKED her. So during Biology I told Becky I’d
had a crush on her ever since fifth grade.
But Becky went straight to the TEACHER,
and five minutes later I had a new lab partner.
And I’m seriously thinking about the JAIL option
again, because I don’t know if I can last the rest
of the school year dealing with Kelson Garrity.
196
That’s not even my WORST problem, though.
Ever since I told Rowley that we’re officially
MOVING, he’s been a total MESS. Even
though he keeps promising he’s not gonna go all
BLUBBERY on me, the smallest thing can set
him off.
And, even when he IS keeping it together, he
still says these little things that make me feel
GUILTY about moving.
197
On the way home from school today, we had to
walk on the grass because they’d just repaved the
pavement. But that gave Rowley an IDEA. He said
we should write our NAMES in the cement with a
stick and put “BEST FRIENDS” underneath.
It made me a little uncomfortable writing in
something so PERMANENT, though, especially
since I didn’t know what the friend situation
would be in my new neighbourhood. I didn’t wanna
mention that to Rowley, though, because I knew
it would set him off again.
198
So I wrote some extra stuff with the stick to
give me a little wiggle room, just in case.
Saturday
School ended a week ago and, while everyone
ELSE is already enjoying their summer holiday,
we’ve been PACKING.
199
Mom created a binder and a schedule for everyone
in the family, and we’re all responsible for boxing
up our own stuff. It’s gonna be TIGHT, but
we should be done by the time the moving lorries
show up next weekend.
The person who’s taking the LONGEST is DAD.
He wants to make sure none of his Civil War
figurines break, so he’s using a whole roll of bubble
wrap for each ONE.
Mom’s been hoping our neighbours would throw us a
going-away party, but, with all the construction
over the past month, we’re not that POPULAR
around here. So Mom decided we’d just throw a
party for OURSELVES.
200
The party was TONIGHT. We’d sent out
invitations to just about ev
eryone on our street,
and we set everything up in our yard.
Rodrick was excited, because Mom and Dad
were letting his band play, and they were even
PAYING him. We were still busy setting up when
the first guests started to arrive.
I wasn’t sure if I should even INVITE Rowley
to the party, because I was afraid he might have
another breakdown. But I was actually really
happy to see him.
201
His parents seemed happy, TOO, and I almost
got the feeling they were GLAD I was moving.
Rowley said he had a GIFT for me, which was a
giant collage with a bunch of pictures of us over
the years. And, I’m not gonna lie, it got me a
little choked up.
202
I was kind of RELIEVED that’s all Rowley’s
gift was. Because the way he’s been acting lately,
I wouldn’t be surprised if he gave me one of his
FINGERS or something.
Rowley said I could hang the collage in my NEW
bedroom to remind me of all the fun stuff we did
together. And I don’t know if there was a lot
of pollen in the air tonight or WHAT, but right
then I think I got something in my eye.
Things were getting a little too touchy-feely for
me, though, so I was glad when more people
started to arrive at the party.
It picked up really FAST from there. Rodrick’s
band started playing out on the back deck, and
the music attracted some teenagers who were at
a high-school graduation party a few doors down.
Then it seemed like everyone on our street was at
our party all at ONCE, and it got CRAZY.
204
Our party was pretty WILD, but it was
NOTHING compared to MANNY’S. And his
party was still going strong when I turned in for
the night.
Sunday
I have to admit, last night was a lot of FUN.
But I’m kind of SAD, because just when things
are getting GOOD around here we’re LEAVING.
I was the first one in the house awake today,
and when I looked out of the window, I knew we
were in for a long day of clean-up.
205
I wished we still had that Skip, because that
would’ve made things a whole lot EASIER.
While I was looking over the front lawn, two
big moving lorries pulled up at the kerb. I was
kind of CONFUSED, because our move was still a
week away.
A few guys got out of the lorries, and one of
them came to our front door. So I went out to
MEET him.
206
The man told me his team was ready to start
putting our stuff into the lorries, and they needed
to come into the house. By now, Mom had come
downstairs and was at the front door.
She told the guy that he was a week EARLY,
and that the move wasn’t until NEXT Sunday.
But he pulled out a contract that showed
TODAY’S date as the moving day, and it had
Mom’s SIGNATURE at the bottom.
Mom told the guy she’d made a MISTAKE, and
that we weren’t READY to move yet. He told
her the deposit was “non-refundable” and that if
we didn’t move TODAY we’d lose the money we’d
already paid.
207
Now Mom was in a PANIC. She woke everyone up
and told us to get PACKING. The movers said
we had a two-hour window to get everything on
to the lorries, so we really had to HUSTLE.
