Fallocaust (The Fallocaust Series Book 1)

by Quil Carter

  I looked around – did I even know? My mind felt like it was swimming in toxic soup. I kept getting grasps of what the fuck I was supposed to do but the next moment it was gone.

  “Hey, am I working tonight? Am I on the way, on the… did, aren’t you working in the trunk?” I said my words slurred. I looked around again. “What’s brought this… I need, no I really can’t see anything in this direction. It’s all cleared. Nu-nucleared.”

  There was a pause. When he responded I could tell he was running. “Reaver, do you see any landmarks? Please, concentrate and tell me what you see. This is important.”

  “Red,” I said looking at my shimmering bloodstained hands. I waved them in front of my face. “Hey, am I… working…?” I took one last look at the radio before I put it onto my belt clip.

  “Reaver? Where are you, are you on the road?”

  “Yep,” I said as I picked up a limp Killian. It didn’t even occur to me to press the talk button at that moment. Greyson sounded like he was busy anyway, it wasn’t easy running a block. I still didn’t fucking know if I was working or not. I had to get Killian home first; get him some clothes, maybe a gun.

  I stared ahead, putting one foot in front of the other. I could feel something bumping up against the side of my face. I wondered if it was my ear but if I moved an arm away to check, I knew Killian would fall.

  One foot in front of the other. Keep walking, get Killian to Aras, get Killian back safe to Aras. Killian needs clothes and some food, I could toss him in the air he was as light as a feather. A cold little ghost in my arms. I kept expecting him to fall through my fingers like water.

  “Reaver,” Killian’s weak voice croaked. He partially opened his bruised eyes and looked up at me. I smiled and glanced down.

  “Hey, kitty cat,” I whispered back, trying not to bring attention to the obvious slurring of my words. “Kitty cat.” I don’t know why, he just looked like a kitty cat today. Maybe it was because he was so light, or perhaps because his voice was high-pitched and squeaky, like a kitten’s mew.

  “Killi Cat more like it. Hey, Killi Cat.”

  Killian didn’t smile; he looked at me with his face creased in concern. I could see blood droplets starting to fall on the white Dek’ko coat. I thought it was coming from my head, but I wasn’t sure. And I didn’t care much in that moment.

  I kept saying Killi Cat out loud because it sounded funny to say, and it helped me keep my footsteps in sync.

  I could hear scraping as my boots skidded on the pavement, like a corpse being dragged across the room. My eyes were unfocused and dazed, and I had no idea how I was managing to stand. I just put one foot in front of the other. Counting steps and saying things that only made sense to my pulsing, burning brain.

  Until I started to hear them yell.

  My eyes focused just in time to see Leo running up to me. To my confusion he then began to slow down, then stopped altogether.

  “Fuck,” he whispered. He looked horrified. Another blur came into view and turned into Greyson.

  “Give me Killian, son,” he said softly. He held out his arms and took the boy from my grasp.

  “He’s safe?” I said wearily. Greyson, not taking his eyes off of me, nodded. I nodded too and went to take a step, but stumbled forward.

  “Take Killian, he’s lighter,” Greyson said, pushing the boy into Leo’s arms. He then grabbed me and to my shock picked me up.

  “No, let me go, asshole,” I groaned. Then I mumbled Killi Cat a few more times.

  “We’ll be home soon, just try and stay awake,” Greyson said as they started to run.

  I could feel my body bouncing around in his arms, making my back sting. My whole body was beginning to succumb to a dull, burning pain. I tried to shift, but Greyson’s strong arms held me. Leo and Greyson were talking to each other in scared rushed voices; I could hear weak sounds from Killian.

  I struggled again, but Greyson spoke sternly to me. I squirmed again and let out a frustrated howl.

  “I gotta make my fuckin’ entrance!” I exclaimed loudly. I tried to raise my head but I fell back against his arm. To my anger he and Leo started to laugh. I looked up to see tears running down Greyson’s face. Leo beside him, gripping Killian, was also holding back tears.

  “Shut up, you delusional idiot,” Greyson said through his laughter. I scoffed and smiled, and tried to keep my head raised, though it didn’t take long until everything just became a blur.

  Chapter 13

  Reaver

  My mind started to come out of its haze when we were in Doc’s clinic. My consciousness edged me forward, only to snatch me away in the same instant. I don’t know how long it was before I finally felt the first trickles of awareness.

  In front of me were the clinic windows. It was still daylight outside though I had no idea what time it was. The window was dirty; Josh the grounds keeper wasn’t doing his job, I guess. Maybe he needed more soap.

  Soap… the smell. Would I ever smell it again?

  At the thought of him my body jerked into full consciousness. I opened my eyes and looked around. “Killian? Where’s Killian?” I said loudly.

  “He’s getting fluids,” Leo’s calm voice reassured. He was right behind me. I jolted a bit as I felt a painful prick in the side of my head.

  “Stay still!” Leo hissed.

  I stood up.

  “Grey?” Leo said in alarm. I took a step forward, but as I did I jumped up in the air.

  Something stuck my neck.

  I turned around confused and held my neck, but as I turned, it did it again.

  “It’s the needle. I’m putting your ear back on,” Leo said, exasperated. He got up as Greyson walked in.

  “He’s trying to escape; I think he’s waking up.”

  Greyson looked at me and put his hand out reassuringly. He had blood spots all over his faded button-down shirt.

  “Sit down, Reaver, everything is fine; Killian is just fine.” I took a step back and tried to put my hand on the side of my head. It felt like ground burger.

  “What the…” My brow furrowed. Greyson turned around and picked up a mirror from one of the metal shelves. I took it from him and looked.

  I didn’t recognize myself at first. No wonder Leo had stopped dead in his tracks when he saw me.

  My face was covered in blood and dirt, blood mostly. Nasty burn marks edged the sides of my face and my nose. I could even see the peeling charred skin on the back of my neck, where the skin had been shredded off to reveal painful red flesh underneath.

  I think I was missing some skin on my chin too, though it might have just been blood dried to my stubble. The worst part though, from what I could see at least, was my ear.

  It had been split diagonally almost right in half. The skin around it was raw and angry. It looked like Leo had managed two stitches before I had stopped him. The needle was hanging by the wire thread, dangling right by my nape.

  I craned my neck, to where the black burn marks were. The wounds had been cleaned, which I didn’t remember, but they hadn’t been bandaged up yet. There were a great deal of burn and puncture marks, some of them pretty open. From the way my back was starting to ache and burn, that whole area was like that. I could feel cold air on my back. Fucking bombs.

  “I just want to see him,” I said, putting the mirror down. I started looking around the open medical area. Light was coming from the back room I walked towards it.

  “Reaver,” Leo sighed. “You’re worse off than you think.”

  I walked towards the room, just as Doc was coming out.

  “Hey, it’s the hero.” Doc smiled, he was wiping blood off of his hands.

  I looked behind him. “I want to see him.”

  Doc motioned into the room. “Marley is sitting with him.”

  I stepped in. Doc’s daughter Marley was trying to wipe the dirt off of one of Killian’s facial wounds. She was a nice girl, not as shrill and loud as the other ones.

  “Okay, get out,” I said
to her.

  Marley got up and handed me the cloth. “We tranqed him when he came in so we could flush his stomach. He’ll probably be up soon.”

  Marley left the room; I shut the door behind her. I didn’t want to have an audience.

  I took a deep breath and tried to gather myself. I grabbed the cloth and exhaled, before I knelt down beside him.

  The little blond boy looked even smaller under his mountain of blankets. A tiny bruised face in a sea of grey wool folds.

  I pulled the blanket back to take a better look at his body, feeling my mouth purse as I was reminded just how skinny he had let himself get. It looked like they had dressed him in some of his clothes, but he still looked like a skeleton.

  A sewn up skeleton. The corners of his mouth were stitched up, five stitches in each corner. It reminded me of one of those cloth ragdolls the old women made the children sometimes.

  I watched his chest rise and fall. His breathing was normal as was his heartbeat, that filled me with relief. I was really worried something would be wrong with his breathing after all the toxic smoke he’s inhaled.

  I felt my hand rise; I was still holding the cleaning cloth Marley had given me. Before I could convince myself not to, I started to dab the sweat on his forehead. His skin looked so pale and clammy it was almost transparent. I could see every vein underneath his paper-thin skin, snaking along his face like lightning strikes. I looked at his chest, which was even worse. His skin was grey, see-through, and discoloured as red blotches and veins shone through.

  My heart started to beat faster, fuelling the flares of nervousness in my chest. All these emotions drowning out my own searing pain.

  I gently brushed away the sweat and bits of blood. I had never been so careful with someone; his skin looked like it would tear away with just my touch.

  I let out a slow breath, my gaze fixed on his face. I couldn’t take my eyes off of him.

  Inside me was a pit of churning emotions. Sad he looked so weak, bruised, and frail, but so fucking happy he was still breathing. We were safe; anyone who came to get him now would have to deal with the scourge of the greywastes. He was mine now; I wouldn’t ever take the fact he was alive for granted. I wasn’t going to only realize how much he meant to me when he was in danger.

  I made a solemn oath in that moment. I knew my decision would affect me for the rest of my life. I would take care of him from now on. He was mine to guard and mine to protect. I didn’t know if he was interested in me, but if he was, maybe I would try out this love thing. If not, I would follow him for the rest of my life, and make sure he was safe from harm.

  I put the cloth down, trying to ignore how cut up my hands looked. I rested my hand beside his face, and felt his warm breath against it. It brought me back to when he had those night terrors. When I was too chicken shit to touch him, to comfort him. Would I have the balls to comfort him next time?

  I moved my hand and hovered it over his head. I took a deep breath and gathered myself.

  Then I brushed his golden hair off of his face, and put my hand on his head.

  I held it there, and just stared at him. Then I gently stroked his hair back. It was dirty and mussed up but perfect.

  I rested my hand for a few moments, just feeling the warmth of his head under my cold fingers. I wanted to keep it there forever, but I didn’t want to risk him waking up.

  It was one thing to have the nerve to do it when he was asleep; if I did it when he was awake I might have heart attack.

  I took my hand away, and let out a long shaky breath. I hadn’t even realized I had been holding it.

  I stood up and walked towards the rusted metal door. I looked back, just to check if he was still sleeping. I couldn’t help but notice the droplets of blood beside him, where I had been kneeling. I hadn’t even noticed that I hadn’t stopped bleeding.

  I opened the door and faced the three amigos, waiting for me from across the room. I could see Marley off in the corner cleaning where I had been lying.

  “He’s still conscious. I thought he would be back on the floor twitching by now,” Doc said with a grin. He walked towards me and shone a light in my eyes.

  “Sit down, boy, let us hold you down and put some wire into you, and you can go home to your cave like the wild animal you are.”

  “Oh you understand me, Doctor.” I managed a smirk through my cut lips. His sarcasm seemed to break the sullen mood in my head. “Just hurry up, it’s been a long day.”

  Greyson laughed, then to my surprise he threw his arms around me and gave me a hug. I cringed and bit my lip to try and hide how much it fucking hurt.

  “It sure damn well has. Promise you’ll tell us everything? I know better than to make you now.” He patted my shoulders as he pulled away. I saw brushes of blood on his coat from where it had touched my back.

  I sat down and felt Leo start to mess with my ear. “Now I just want to hide out for a few days,” I muttered.

  Greyson knelt down. I noticed he was holding his own hook and thread. Behind him, Doc was also brandishing his torture instrument. I hated these idiots being so close to me, but the faster I could appease their maternal instincts the sooner I could go home.

  “Reaver, Mom made you and Killian some food,” Marley said from the corner of the room.

  I looked at her blankly. No one on the block had ever made me food before. Greyson seemed to notice my confusion.

  “You’re a hero, Reaver,” Greyson said. I could hear pride in his voice. “Everyone likes Killian and they were worried about you. They had their ears glued to the radio after Leo, Reno, and I came back without you.”

  I grunted. It never occurred to me that the block would know about all of this. I hoped they didn’t start thinking I had gone soft. I would make an effort to be even more of a dick to counteract it.

  I would let Killian have the food, he needed it more than I did. Skinny little fucker.

  Suddenly I felt a bit faint. My head nodded forward. Leo grabbed my neck to steady it.

  “You have a concussion, probably a bad one,” Leo said. “Something exploded behind you, didn’t it?”

  “My C4, when they tried to get into the pod room.” Greyson steadied my head as Leo finished torturing my ear. I could also feel Doc putting stitches into my back. I still had my shirt on, yet I could feel his bare hands so I knew I was missing most of my shirt and armour. I had a feeling I didn’t even want to know how bad it looked.

  “When can I go home?” I asked wearily. “I need to do some drugs and get my head on right. I feel half-dazed.” I blinked hard; Greyson was starting to split into two people – the whole damn room was.

  I started feeling a bit nauseas. I felt an overpowering urge to just go home. I had been going full throttle for a long time now, I was crashing. I needed some pills, or some cocaine… fuck, I missed security and silence.

  “Soon. Just let us finish the ear and your neck, and you’ll be fine to go home,” Leo said.

  “What about Killian?” I asked. I didn’t want to leave him here. I knew he was safe in Aras, but I just wanted to be close to him. Make sure he was okay, not having any bad dreams or anything.

  “He’s better off than you are on the outside. Doc’s done some tests on him already–” Leo started, before Doc cut in.

  “– and I want more done too once he’s rested a bit.”

  Leo nodded. “We can bring him down to your cave when he’s ready to be released. He won’t leave our sight until he’s safe with you.”

  I heard Leo clip the thread and a few moments later I felt the sting of the antiseptic as it was poured onto my ear. I grinded my teeth as it drained down, covering my neck and back.

  “Promise?” I grunted through clenched teeth.

  “Promise.” Greyson got up and patted me on the shoulder. I was too tired to even cringe. I didn’t like the idea of leaving Killian at Doc’s, but I felt better at the prospect of getting some drugs into me before he saw me. I was a wreck and I didn’t want him to see
me weak.

  Leo began to cover me in gauze. Greyson pushed a cloth sack into my hand.

  “Disinfectant, food, all that crap. For you and him. You and Killian can also get first dibs on the merchants’ caravans. I think that’s your biggest haul to date!”

  Leo let out an exasperated breath. “Greyson, don’t fucking joke about that.”

  But the corners of my mouth were already raised in a smirk. My brain was damaged enough that I recognized the sick humour in it. After Leo finished bandaging me, I put my gun back over my back and picked up the cloth bag. I walked out of the doors and into the streets.

  A wave of anticipation went through me as I realized what I had told Greyson and Leo. Bring Killian to my house when he was ready to leave Doc’s. The boy was going to see my house.

  I hadn’t brought anyone new to my den. The ones who knew where it was were the ones that had helped me reinforce and wall it off. My windowless basement was a dump compared to his obsessively clean two-storey house.

  I stopped and leaned up against a dusty brick store front, my chest becoming tight. I knew I was crashing, I knew reality was coming up to greet me. My whole world had changed in the past twenty-four hours, and it was about to change even more in the next twenty-four. Killian was alive, I was alive… shit, I had been sure I was going to die. I had been sure I was going to the legionaries and to the factory to die. I hadn’t planned this far ahead. I hadn’t even considered what would happen if I brought him back alive.

  I… I loved that kid.

  My heart tightened even more, hurting from sheer anxiety. I had always been solitary, it was my norm. I enjoyed being by myself, I only had a few people who treated me like family, and I didn’t even like being around them for long periods of time. And the other people in my block? I fucking hated them, bunch of idiots, most of whom would be dead within half an hour if they ever left the walls. I protected them on the wall because it was my duty, but I laughed when they died. I was a sadistic mess. I never thought I would fall for someone because I didn’t even know what love fucking meant.