My Heart

by A J Wolf

  I shake my head and whistle for Dylan. We're almost to the lawn and I don't want him taking off again.

  Just as we break into the open lawn Remy stops me with a hand on my forearm, "Go inside Bev, I apparently have an unexpected guest."

  Frowning I look around, unsure what he's talking about, until I see the car parked along the black iron fencing near the back gate. Remy pulls the gun from the holster he wears under his sweats and checks the chamber. Taking his phone out with his other hand and tilting slightly away from me, he calls someone, speaking in Italian. After a moment he notices me watching and gives a quick goodbye, slipping the phone back into his pocket. He steps close to me, ignoring grumbles from Dylan and gently tugs my bottom lip from my teeth using his thumb. I hadn't even realized I was chewing it. "Just one of my Capos who needs to see me. No need to worry Cuore Mio." He says quietly, running his knuckles along my cheek.

  Taking a small step back that causes his hand to fall between us, I drop my gaze to his unholstered gun and back, "Then why is your gun still out? Lying is no way to regain trust Remy."

  He smiles, running the back of his free hand roughly over his lips. "Let's just say he isn't one of my favorite Capos."

  It's my turn to hum a response now. His comment hits a bitter cord and I look away sharply. "You mean like Julian?" It passes through my lips before I can stop it, thrumming the cord of tension hanging in the air.

  "Not now Beverly." Ah so it's my full name now. Always is when he feels he has a point to make. I hear him put his gun away and shift closer before he speaks, "Go inside and stay in the room. I will be up shortly." I start to leave without looking at him but he snatches my hand, forcing my gaze. Kissing my palm softly before letting it drop, "Don't let Dylan sleep on the bed."

  I turn and start walking away without comment, but I can't contain the laugh that bubbles out. I know that was his intention, to lighten the mood and distract me. But I'm not distracted and I don't plan on minding my own business anymore.

  ▪ ▪ ▪ ▪

  Three hours later and Remy still hasn't returned. I know he came back inside because his sweats and shirt were lying on the floor of the closet when I got to the room. I must have just missed him since I decided to go to the kitchen and grab a bag of jerky for Dylan and the jar of candy Gretchen hides in the pantry for me. The clock says it's just after one am and I still haven't gone to bed; too many thoughts running through my head. I tried but I kept finding my eyes opening in the dark. Dylan is sound asleep, laying on Remy's pillow. He's going to hate that and the thought makes me smile. He deserves it after brushing me aside earlier.

  Huffing I throw my blankets off and grab the candy jar. I don't care what Remy said, I've been in the room long enough and I want a glass of wine. I'm greeted by a quiet, low lit house on my way to the kitchen. I'm not even sure if Remy is home. There are always a few lights on for his made men standing guard so that isn't a good indicator. I find a bottle of some fancy label red wine open in the cooler and pull it out, take several huge gulps while sitting at the island. If Gretchen were to see me chugging this, no doubt expensive, wine she’d have a heart attack. After a while I get up, deciding to take it back to the room with me. Hopefully it will help me sleep. Just as I'm entering the living area, I hear voices coming my way. If I was smart, I would hustle up the stairs and sit in the room like a good girl. But I'm far from caring at the moment. My life is a fucking miserable mess right now and my husband is a lying, secretive bastard. Okay, wow, the wine must be hitting me pretty hard already. Glaring at the wine label I forget what I was even worried about.

  "Cuore Mio what are you doing up? It's late." His words are soft but the tension behind them gives me goosebumps. Oh fuck. I shift the wine bottle behind my back in an absurd attempt to hide it from view, rotating to face Remy; he’s with a tall, lanky man I only vaguely recognize.

  "Just headed to the room actually, so I'll just go." I give a rude kind of smile and go to step past him, but he grabs my hand before I can get by. The man next to him eyes my exposed legs before turning his attention back to Remy speaking, you guessed it, Italian. While his attention is on Remy, I do a scan of my own. Tall, thin, buzzed brown hair and pale brown eyes. He's not unattractive but nothing about him is all that impressive. He notices me looking and smiles, causing Remy to glance between us with a frown. I look away without returning it and take a swing of my wine, no use in hiding it now. Remy shifts my body behind his, breaking the line of sight between me and whoever that guy is.

  After what feels like hours, I try to wiggle my fingers from Remy's grip but he tightens his hand, squeezing almost painfully. And he says I'm dramatic. I stick my tongue out at his back and down the last of my wine; honestly, why is he even keeping me here. Reaching over to set the bottle on a decorative side table, I accidentally tug Remy's hand with me. He shoots me a look that clearly says to knock my shit off, but I hold the bottle up and give him a look of my own before loudly setting it on the table. I'm starting to feel tired so Remy needs to hurry the fuck up. Faking a loud obnoxious yawn, I pinch the back of his arm. Thankfully he gets the hint and pulls me forward with a slight nudge towards the stairs.

  Seeing that I'm leaving, Mr. Buzz Cut reaches forward and snatches my hand, placing a kiss on the back before I'm able to pull it away. "I haven’t seen you in quite some time. Have you been gone?" He glances at Remy and I yank my hand from his without answering, unconsciously taking a step back into Remy. I don't realize I've done it until his large palm rests against my stomach, anchoring me to him.

  "Beverly, I’m sure you remember Gavino…one of my Capos." Remy grumbles out while Gavino looks between us.

  Gavino is rubbing his chin with an admittedly creepy smile that makes me fidget uncomfortably. "Yes…just a Capo. As you said earlier it's late, I'll head out now."

  Remy nudges me forward again, following this time. "Soon Gavino. I'm sure you can see yourself out." Lifting his hand, a few of his men come out of the woodworks to guide Gavino out.

  I stumble a few times on the stairs but make it to the room in one piece. I may have drank too much. I'm about three steps in the door when I'm being pulled back and pressed to the wall by a very angry looking Remy. His inked forearms are caging my head in and his big body is flush with mine. When did he take his suit off? I know there's a reason he's mad, but I can't quite remember what it is. I give him a beaming smile, tilting my face to look into his and his frown falters just a bit.

  "Why were you down there Beverly?" His voice has a dangerous quality to it but I'm too far gone to care. I feel great actually. I don't think I've felt this good in a while. Definitely didn't earlier. "Beverly."

  Oh, I must not have answered, "I couldn't sleep so I got some wine."

  "I told you to stay in the room." I'm smiling again and his beautiful honey eyes keep going to my lips. His voice sounds a little less angry. Why is he angry? I feel like I should be angry, but I don't want to be.

  I run my hands up his bare chest, resting one palm over his heart and bringing the other to the back of his neck. He lets me pull him down to rest our foreheads together. My heart is banging in my chest but I ignore it. "Don't be mad Remy…I don't want to be mad right now."

  He closes his eyes for a few seconds, releasing a big breath that blows the loose hair around my face. Straightening, he drops an arm to cover my hand on his chest with on of his own. "Okay Cuore Mio. Let's go to bed…we can talk tomorrow." He steps back and lifts our joined hands to kiss my palm before nodding to the bed. "Get in. I'll only be a few minutes."

  I climb into the bed as the lights flick off, noticing Dylan is still sprawled across Remy's side. Ooh he is going to hate that. The thought makes me giggle as I scoot near the middle of the bed to rub his ears.

  "What are you giggling about? And why is Dylan on the bed? He has his own." I look over my shoulder to find Remy crawling up beside me, so I roll to face him.

  "He likes sleeping on the bed. I like it too. He made sleeping alone th
e last three months bearable." I feel like something about this is wrong but I push the feeling aside. I don't want to deal with it. Remy grabs me, pulling me to him; we're face to face, legs tangled, bodies flush. Taking my hands in his he gently kisses the inside of both wrists, holding them between us.

  "You're going to hate this in the morning but I can't help myself." His lips brush my fingertips as he talks, streaks of moonlight from the window casting shadows across his face. The sight makes my heart start its pitter pattering again. "You don't have to sleep alone tonight Cuore Mio." He tucks me up under his chin and kisses my forehead, resting his lips there. Pressing my face into his neck I let out a deep breath and let myself sleep.

  Chapter Four

  Gripping the figlio di puttana by his cheeks I bend down so our faces are level. "I'm getting tired of this game. Tell me why Julian Esposito was working with the Daly brothers." I squeeze his cheeks tightly making him resemble a fish before dropping my hand. His head flops forward onto his heaving chest; blood dripping from various cuts his insolence has already cost him. He's mumbling now but I can't make it out. "Speak up or I'll be forced to blow this kneecap of yours." I tap his leg with my brass knuckles to get my point across.

  "I don't know who that is." Blood is dripping from his mouth as he looks up at me, bruises cover his face, an eye swollen. He's a fucking mess. You'd think the fucker would be tired of this shit and spill the beans already.

  I give him a good uppercut, snapping his head back and sending a few broken bits of teeth to the floor. "You and I both know that's a lie." As soon as his head comes back to face me, I send it sideways with a left hook. Aaand there goes more teeth. I straighten and blow out a loud breath, "It would be a lot easier if you just told me what I want to hear testa di cazzo. Last chance to answer...Better make it count."

  "Fuck tú, tú píosa cac!" He spits blood at my feet, trying to be tough in his last moments. Seems ridiculous but okay.

  "I don't know what you just said, but it sounded disrespectful as fuck." I drop my brass knuckles on the ground, letting them clank and ting against the floor. "I admire your loyalty, but your death is pointless. Shame." Grabbing the bat that was waiting for me, I cock and swing as hard as I can, smashing against the kneecap I threatened earlier. The wet snap and pop bringing a smile to my face; damn it feels good to fuck shit up. I toss the bat to the side and turn my back on the useless wailing man I've wasted two hours on. Reaching down to scoop up my brass knuckles I tuck them into my pocket; they’re my favorite pair and I’m not about to lose them in this dump. Rolling my sleeves back down and slipping my suit jacket back on, I signal for one of my made men as I'm leaving the building. With a nod he holds the door open as I exit, waiting until I'm down the steps to let it shut. As I'm getting into my car, I hear a shot that ceases the awful screams that were leaking through the doors. Thank fuck.

  I have a meeting with my Consigliere and Capo Bastone in forty minutes I need to get too. I'd rather cancel on them and force Beverly to spend time with me but that's not practical. It was physically painful leaving her this morning, but I'm glad I left before she woke up. I can't even imagine the shit show that would have taken place once she realized she cuddled me all night. Sighing, I grab a rag from my bag of extra clothes and wipe the blood from my hands. Admittedly, kidnapping Beverly probably wasn't my best idea; but it was time for her to come home and she wouldn’t have come back any other way. Damn if that woman can’t hold a grudge. If she needs someone to blame then I’ll happily take it, just as long as I eventually get my wife back. Call me naïve but I know she still loves me…and I can work with that. I'll do whatever it takes to get Cuore Mio, my heart, to come back to me.

  Pulling into the gates I crack my knuckles. Once I'm done with this shit, I can find Beverly. Stepping out of the car I can see Dylan fucking with some of my guards in the yard; He's honestly such an ass. He doesn't listen to anyone but Bev and spends most of his time terrorizing the household. I'd never say that to her though, she'd have my damn head. Leaning against my car I pull out a cigarette and light it while waiting for Donatello and Andrea. I've been smoking a lot more than I care to admit since Bev left. A habit I normally only do when stressed, but it has been a wreck without her and Julian. Fucking Julian.

  "Stressful morning?" My eyes snap over to Bev as she heads my way. Blowing some smoke into the sky I smile at her then put the cigarette out, stuffing it in my pocket.

  "Something like that. What're you doing today?" She's wearing my favorite pair of denim cut offs, no doubt by accident and a cropped hoodie. Her long, dark hair is wild around her face because of the braid she had it in last night and the summer sun has brought out more of her beautiful freckles. Ignoring the look she gives me, I scoop her up and plop her on the hood of my car.

  She tries to scoot back so we aren't flush but I pull her back to me, running my palms up her thighs. "Isn't it a little early to be busting knuckles?" She asks after giving up on getting away, snatching my hand to look at the marks left from the brass knuckles. I don't miss how she ignored my question.

  Chuckling, I run my thumb over her hand before she lets it drop. "No such thing." My gaze drops to her lips…I want to kiss her so badly. I've never had an issue with PDA and her; let everyone see how much I adore my wife, but I know she doesn't want that kind of intimacy yet. Too bad for her I'm a selfish man. Ignoring the slight stiffening of her shoulders, I slide my hands to cup her face, pushing my fingers into her hair. My lips are almost brushing hers, "Can I kiss you Cuore Mio?"

  "No." She says it even as her hands clutch my suit jacket, unconsciously pulling me closer. I smile though, expecting that. Tilting her head slightly I drop a hand back to her thigh and start trailing soft kisses along her jaw. I kiss to her lips, just brushing the corner before hopping to the other side to start over.

  "Remy..." her voice is breathless despite the bite in that one word.

  I hear a car pulling in and come back to her lips. "Seems my meeting is about to start." I give her a quick hard peck, pulling back before she can even react, then lift her off the car with a smile. She's definitely not smiling and has her arms crossed over her chest. "You didn't say what you were doing today."

  She stares at me a moment then gives me a rather rude smile before whistling for Dylan and walking towards the house. Just as he meets her side she looks over her shoulder, "And I'm not about to."

  I smile to myself watching her walk away. God, I love that woman but she's a damn brat.

  Donatello, my Consigliere, stops at my side just as she gets to the door. "I see Bev is back."

  I hum in response just as Andrea pulls in. Getting out his attention is on Dylan through the glass in the door. "No one was going to tell me that fucking dog was back?"

  Donatello laughs loudly at this which makes me smile. "He really does hate you."

  Andrea is grumbling something I can't make out, but it doesn't matter. We need to get started. The sooner it's over the sooner I can bother Bev. "Come on stronzos, we have shit to do."

  ▪ ▪ ▪ ▪

  "You've been pretty hands on lately, yea?" Donatello asks, clearly noticing my hands and probably hearing talk through the warehouses.

  I nod in answer and sit back in my chair, swirling my whiskey. "Yes. It's irking the fuck out of me that I don't know why Julian was working with the Daly brothers."

  Andrea is sitting with his hands resting on his knees looking at his own glass. "It honestly doesn't even make sense that he was…and why isn't anyone talking? We've tried both buying and beating the information out."

  Sighing loudly, I shrug and set my glass down. I agree it doesn't make sense. Julian was one of my most loyal Capos; worked his ass off to get to his position, ran his own men well. Fuck, he was my own brother in law. I've spent every moment Beverly was gone trying to get answers for the both of us. "I have no idea. If he hadn't admitted it to my face, I would have thought it was a lie." I run my hand over my face before continuing, "Whatever the reason must
be a damn good one for everyone to stay so silent. It seems that I need to request an audience with The Westies." I despise the idea of having to see Joseph McGrath, head of The Westies, but he might have answers for me.

  Donatello sits next to Andrea and runs his ringed knuckles together in contemplation. Where I'm covered in ink, Donatello only has one on his thumb; one of the few differences in our appearances. Unlike Andrea who is built like a bear, wears a man bun and has baby blues like his mama. "Has to be some kind of blackmail. Something bad enough Julian was willing to lose his life over it." Donatello says, pulling my attention back to the present. "We know Gavino has been embezzling for a few years now yea? Well I've been hearing some buzz about him making trades with The Westies from some of the Capos and loyal associates."

  Andrea huffs and downs his glass before setting it on my desk, "You think that figlio di puttana is that stupid? Remy executed Julian, his own brother in law, over the same shit."

  It's Donatello's turn to shrug, "I don't have a timeline. Maybe he's been doing it and it's just now being brought to light because of Julian...scared people into talking."

  Pinching my bottom lip in thought I don't say anything right away. "We need to look into Gavino then. See what you can get before he's confronted. If he ends up having a hand in the same shit as Julian, then his punishment will be the same. I can't have men thinking they can fuck around with whoever they want. He might be my adopted brother, but he took the omerta the same as the rest of us." I stand and look out the window, our conversation is making me feel prickly with annoyance. Blackmail is a logical guess for Julian's actions. He knew he'd be executed for breaking his omerta and committing treason. I'd already considered it but couldn't come up with anything that could possibly been held against him. He didn't do drugs, he had his own money, his and Bev’s parents are wealthy and would give him anything he needed. "And about the blackmail, I considered it also. The only thing I can think of is Beverly being held over his head…she’s the only family he cared about. But even that feels like a long shot, she's virtually untouchable here."