Soul of a Gunslinger

by Jim Cox

  “I’m sure you’d find the site worthwhile, Lefty answered. “How do I go about getting your inspectors to come to the site?”

  “It would take a great deal of evidence from you before we’d incur the expense of sending an inspector for a determination. I doubt you have the evidence to wit our interest.”

  Lefty nodded, and after a bit of small talk, he thanked the banker and turned to leave, but then he turned back and asked, “Mr. Stroud, may I ask your advice on something?” He nodded. “I have a considerable amount of gold in hiding at my digging site and need men and mules to help haul it here. Can you help me locate the men?”

  “How many men and mules would you need?” the banker asked. “Would two be sufficient?”

  “I’m figuring eight men and ten or twelve mules are needed to get the gold haul I’ve got dug already.” The banker’s eyes bugged. Then he stood and rounded his desk to face Lefty.

  “I can arrange the men and mules, Mr. Newman. I’ll even arrange a company inspector from St. Louis to go along with you to evaluate the site and determine a fair price, but I’ll have to act fast in order to get him here before you head for the mountains.” Lefty nodded, feeling pleased his scheme to bring the banker into his fold had worked.

  “Mr. Newman,” the banker said, “we must keep this whole matter between ourselves. If the word got out, we’d be swamped with thieves along the way.” Lefty smiled.

  On his way home, Lefty stopped at a saloon and tossed off a couple to celebrate his accomplishment with the banker. Then he headed home to tell his friends the exciting news. When he entered the pastry shop, Louise and Hide were grinning from ear-to-ear. “What’s going on with you two? You’re grinning like an opossum.” Then he heard humming coming from behind the pastry room curtain, so he pulled it back; it was Suzan.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  “Suzan!” Lefty shouted. “What are you doing here?” But she didn’t answer him. Instead, she ran to him with wide-open arms and tears streaming down. They clung to each other in a tight embrace for a long minute, maybe two, then she pulled back and kissed him on the lips. As they stood looking at each other, Lefty’s mind had an exciting thought, that wasn’t a firm, lingering kiss, but it was certainly more than a friendship kiss.

  Louise and Hide had stayed in the pastry area letting the two have their privacy, but when they heard them talking, they joined them. “Why don’t we all sit down at the table with coffee and let Suzan explain why she came back,” Louise said as she placed cups and poured coffee.

  Suzan explained she had never been so devastated in her entire life as when the ship left the San Francisco harbor, watching her friends fade out of her existence. She thought the feeling would subside as time passed, but instead, it got worse, even to the point of her breaking down in tears several times every day. The sailing was slow due to a weak southwest wind, and after sailing for several days, she got word the ship would be stopping at the Las Angles docks to pick up additional passengers, and from there the voyage would be without stops. Suzan never hesitated. When the boarding ramp was placed, and the new passengers were boarding, she hurried down onto the pier, leaving her luggage behind. She was quick to find the dock’s ticket agent who told her the next departure for San Francisco was in twelve days. Still having the entire five-hundred-dollars Lefty had given her, not counting the original cost of the ticket, she purchased a ticket back to San Francisco and asked for directions to the closest hotel in Las Angles with favorable accommodations where she could spend the twelve days. “We only have one hotel,” he said, “and it’s fairly nice.”

  The dock agent was right; the hotel was fairly nice and had a dining area. During the first day at the hotel, she wrote a letter to Mr. Calhoun, her grandfather’s lawyer, telling him of her refusal to accept her inheritance, and that she gladly gives it to her mother. On her second day, she purchased a new dress from a dress shop not far from her hotel. She also purchased a comb and other essentials.

  Suzan couldn’t keep the smile off of her face; she’d never been happier. She stayed busy by visiting hotel employees and guest. Often time, she read books from the hotel’s limited library.

  Suzan didn’t mention the time during her evening meal at the hotel dining room when a well- dressed young man about her age approached her table and introduced himself. It was obvious he was an educated man, probably from a family of means. “May I sit down and enjoy your company, ma’am?” he asked with a wide smile.

  “I’m sorry, but I’m pledged to be married to a man who would not approve of such an engagement.” The man smiled, gave a nod and left.

  All-and-all, she had no problems and did quite well while in Los Angles. People were very helpful while at the hotel and during her trip back to San Francisco.

  When Suzan finished her story, Louise refilled their cups and set a platter of pastries before them. The table was full of questions about her experience, and Suzan did her best to answer them. Finally, Lefty said with a broad grin, “We’re glad you’re back, Suzan, but are you sure you want to pass up your grandfather’s inheritance? Eight million dollars is a lot of money.”

  “I’ve never been surer of anything in my entire life, and I know it might be difficult for you to understand why I’d do this, but to me, grandfather’s inheritance is only money; it’s not happiness. I’ve lived in both environments; a life of plenty and a life with little. For most of my life, I was pampered and was waited on, doing nothing for myself or other people. Maids cleaned my room, washed and ironed my clothes, and cooks prepared my meals. I shopped at my desire and purchased anything I wanted. I had stable men to drive me where I wanted to go and went on vacations all over the world. I even had private tutors that came to my house to instruct me in schooling. I thought I was happy and living a good life, but I wasn’t, not really. I found that out when I became acquainted with the three of you. You have put meaning into my life. You’ve taught me life is not about satisfying oneself but is the giving of oneself to other people; that’s when true happiness comes.” Suzan started to say more, but tears came, and her chin started to quiver.

  Lefty reached for her hands, took a deep breath, and said, “Enough of this kind of talk. You’re back with us, and that’s what counts. We have a lot of work before us, Suzan. There’s a wedding to prepare for, and you have to get ready to sell pastries in the morning.”

  “Yaw,” Hide said. “We ain’t had a card game since you left.”

  Suzan looked at Louise and Hide. “So, there’s a wedding scheduled. I thought you said the wedding would be canceled if Hide went after the gold.” Suzan continued with a smile, “I knew you’d change your mind, Louise. Love bugs can’t be kept apart. When’s the date?”

  Suzan was expecting an exciting answer, but instead, there was a brief silence, then Louise said rather solemnly, “Hide has agreed to keep his promise and not go after the gold, so I’ve agreed to marry him. The wedding has been scheduled for February 23rd.

  “Oh,” Suzan said. “That’s only two weeks away.” Then her worried eyes went to Lefty.

  Routines returned, and the celebration was planned during the days before the wedding. Suzan returned to selling pastries in the mornings which pleased the customers and, in the afternoon, she and Louise made plans and went shopping for wedding things; everything was falling into place.

  Two days before the big event was to take place, Lefty shocked everyone at the supper table when he said nonchalantly, “I’ve rented a room down the bay a-ways. I’ll be moving my belongings tomorrow.”

  All eyes turned to him, and Suzan said, “Why did you do that, Lefty? Why aren’t you staying here with us?”

  “Hide will be kicking you out of the bedroom, Suzan, and you’ll have to take over his cot. It ain’t proper for me to be sleeping in the same room as you.” No one could argue with Lefty’s logic, so after cleaning the table, the cards were fetched, and the dealing began.

  The wedding went off without a hitch and the newly-weds left o
n their ten-day honeymoon the day after. Suzan and Lefty had assumed the jobs of making and selling the pastries and were getting along fine, enjoying themselves in the process.

  One afternoon over coffee while the honeymooners were still gone, Suzan asked Lefty what his plans were after he sold his gold and gold strike and became wealthy; what his plans were for his life.

  Lefty thought on the matter for a spell and then said, “The first thing I want to do is to get shed of being called a gunslinger, but the most important thing I want is to find a woman who will have and love me; who’ll walk side-by-side with me sharing common hopes and dreams, whatever they might be.”

  “How about children, Lefty? Do you want children?”

  He looked at her with a smile, “I wanna have some children, but I ain’t sure how many.”

  She returned his smile and said, “Children makes for a good life. You should find a woman who’ll share those wants now that you’re wealthy.”

  “I ain’t letting her know I’ve got money. She has to be willing to marry me for who I am, not for my money.” Lefty set his cup down and looked at Suzan. She was crying.

  “What’s wrong, Suzan? Why are you crying?” She only shook her head; she wouldn’t answer. “Tell me why you’re crying.” Again, she wouldn’t give Lefty an answer. Lefty stood and went to her, lifting her up in front of him with their eyes upon each other. “What is it, Suzan? What is it you want?”

  “I… I want you,” she said through sobs. “I want to be with you for the rest of my life.” Lefty was stunned; he couldn’t believe what he was hearing; he was speechless.

  “I want you, Lefty. But you don’t want me. You’ve never shown the slightest bit of romantic interest in me since we’ve known each other, and I don’t know why. Tell me why you don’t love me. What have I done? I’ll change for you, just tell me what to change.”

  Lefty’s eyes brightened. “You don’t have to change, Suzan. I love you just the way you are and always have. There’s not a thing about you I’d want changed.”

  “Then why haven’t you told me?” she said wiping her eyes with her knuckles.

  “Because you’re above me, Suzan, and I ain’t sure why you’d want to be married to someone like me when you could have any man on the Barbary Coast. You’re pretty, you’re educated, you’re sophisticated, you have determination, and you don’t cow-down to anyone…not even men.” He smiled and said, “And I know it ain’t my money.”

  “Stop saying those ridiculous things, Albert Newman, and kiss me.”

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  It didn’t take long after Louise and Hide returned from their honeymoon to figure out something was going on between Suzan and Lefty. They’d always been close, but now they were close in a different way. Of course, women are a bit more inclined to snoop into other people’s affairs, so the second day after returning from her honeymoon, Louise cornered Suzan in the kitchen after they’d finished cooking the morning’s pastries, and said, “Something going on between you and Lefty, Suzan. Tell me what it is?”

  Suzan took-on a smirky little smile and said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Yes, you do, and I want to hear about it.”

  “Albert and I are getting married,” she responded excitedly.

  Louise stood in shock. “That’s wonderful, Suzan. When is the big event scheduled to take place?”

  “I’m not sure. The date hasn’t been set yet,” Suzan said.

  “You surely have some general idea; you and Lefty must have discussed it. When does he want to have it?”

  Suzan squirmed a bit, and her smile left, “He doesn’t know we’re getting married, yet.”

  “You mean he hasn’t proposed to you,” Louise asked with a furrowed brow.

  “Not yet, but he will.”

  “How do you know he’ll ask you?”

  “He told me he loved me and we’ve kissed several times,” she said smiling, “he’s a very good kisser, Louise.” Suzan collected her thoughts and continued, “I’ve got it all planned out. He’ll be asking me within a week, you’ll see.”

  “Why did you refer to Lefty as Albert? I’ve never heard you call him Albert before.”

  “He wants to eliminate being thought of as a gunslinger and the best way to do it is to change his name. Of course, we’re only going back to his real name…his Christian name.”

  “I imagine you’ll wait until Lefty… I mean Albert gets back from the gold fields before the wedding takes place.”

  “Not at all,” Suzan hurriedly said. “We’ll be married long before he leaves on his gold trip.”

  “Those trips are dangerous,” Louise said. “There’s a chance he might not come back, or at the very least, you’ll be left alone for a long time while he’s gone. Don’t you think you should postpone the wedding until he gets back?”

  Suzan gaze stayed fixed on Louise as she said, “I know you’re very troubled with men going into the mountains after gold, Louise, and I understand your fear of it since your first husband was murdered in his venture, but as Albert has told me, he’s gone through hell and back chasing after his dream of finding gold, and now that he has, I want to be a part of his dream by being at his side until its finish.” Suzan paused and took a swallow of coffee. “I’m going with him, Louise. And I’m going with him as his wife and do whatever I can to make his trip safe and productive.”

  “Does he know you plan to go with him to retrieve his gold?”

  “I haven’t told him, yet, but I will.”

  Louise lingered on Suzan’s words about staying at Lefty’s side while going after the gold, and then she said in a subdued tone, “You’ve got a lot of telling to do, Suzan. I’d suggest you get started, but right now we need to get the pastries out front. The customers will be showing up shortly.

  The morning passed with the normal rush of pastries customers. When the shop doors were locked, and everything was washed and put back in their place, Louise poured two cups of coffee and motioned for Suzan to join her at the table. “You think I’m taking advantage of Hide, don’t you? You think I’m blackmailing him, by making him chose between marriage or going after his gold.” Suzan was taken back by the sudden question and didn’t know how to respond. Louise continued, “You can’t imagine the pain and sorrow I went through when I was told my husband had been killed. I cried for days. I couldn’t sleep, and I had to force myself to eat. I lost over twenty pounds. I even considered suicide. And it was all because of him chasing after gold in those god-forsaken mountains. I swore to myself I’d never marry again and expose myself to another tragic event like I’d been through with my husband, but Hide came into my life, and I fell in love with him.” Louise was unable to continue because of sobs. Suzan reached for her hands.

  “You’re right, Louise. I can’t imagine the pain I’d go through if Lefty was to be killed. It would be devastating. But I did go through a great deal of sorrow when my father left me in the cabin and attempted to go after help when we were in the mountains. I was hopeful he’d return, but after two weeks, I lost all hope of his return and subconsciously believed he was dead. I had nothing to eat during this two-week period; I lost all of my strength and became extremely thin, and thought for sure I’d die within a few days. That’s when Lefty found me and saved my life.” Suzan paused and then continued, “I remember vividly my father’s last words as he left the cabin for help. He told me life was an adventure and it should be lived to its fullest, no matter the conditions or circumstances, and that a person must have a positive attitude at all times if they are to have a fulfilled life and be happy.”

  “I’m sorry, Suzan. I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories from the past, but the death of your father in the mountains only supports my belief that you should wait for Lefty to return before your marriage. Why would you expose yourself to the possible torture you’d go through if something was to happen to him?”

  The women sat in silence analyzing the questions hanging over th
eir heads. Finally, Suzan said, “I love Lefty with all of my heart, Louise, and I want him to be happy. I want him to chase and fulfill his dreams, and I want to be a part of chasing after them with him. He and Hide have gone through life-threatening experiences in pursuit of their dreams of finding gold.” Suzan squeezed Louise’s hands and said, “I know it’s dangerous, and there’s a chance either, or both of us could be killed in those mountains, but it’s a chance I’m willing to take if it’ll make him happy and he fulfills his dreams.” Louise started to say something but then kept the thought to herself. “Louise,” Suzan said, “I don’t blame you for insisting that Hide stays here and not go along with Lefty after the gold. And don’t worry that you’re keeping Hide from his share of the money. Lefty told me half of the money was Hide’s, even if he didn’t go along.”

  The next four days passed in a fairly typical fashion. However, on the fifth day, there was a bit of excitement. Louise and Hide had left after the morning rush on a business matter, leaving Lefty and Suzan by themselves. They were sitting at the kitchen table enjoying a freshly cooked fried apple pie and coffee when Lefty spoke, “This apple pie sure is good. I could eat one of these every day for the rest of my life.”

  “I accept, Albert,” Suzan said smiling.

  Lefty looked at her with a puzzled expression and asked, “You accept, what, Suzan?”

  Suzan stood, went to Lefty and gave him a lingering kiss. When they parted, she looked at him with smiling eyes and said, “I accept your proposal of marriage. That’s what you were asking when you said you could eat one of my fried apple pies every day for the rest of your life, wasn’t it?”

  “Uh, I guess so,” he said, dumbfounded. But after a few seconds of collecting his thoughts and considering what had just taken place, he said, “Are you sure you want to marry me, Suzan? I ain’t in your class. You can do a lot better than me, and I want the best for you.”

  Suzan looked firmly into his eyes and asked, “Do you love me?”