Open Wounds: The Boxed Set

by Michelle Frost

  “I’m sorry I was so freaked out.”

  Rory took the hand Magnus had placed on his arm, lifting it to his mouth to press a kiss along Magnus’s knuckles. “You have nothing to be sorry for. Will...will you tell me what’s going on? Are you hurt?”

  Magnus shook his head. “No, I’m…” He licked his lips. “I’m okay. I think I just needed a minute. And I need to talk to them.” He motioned to where his brothers were standing. “Will you come with me?”

  Rory could feel himself shaking. “Of course I will, but Magnus, you’re scaring me.”

  Leaning in, Magnus pressed a kiss to Rory’s lips before whispering, “I’m okay, baby.” He pulled back to meet Rory’s eyes. “I’m sorry for the dramatics. Talking about this is something I still struggle with, but I promise I will tell you everything.”

  Settling in Vidar’s office took a few minutes, but then Vidar was shutting the door and turning the lock on the knob. Magnus was grateful. He’d rather not have to go over all this more than once, but he knew that if Rory still...if Rory still wanted him after this, then there would be more questions.

  Vidar walked to the couch where Magnus was seated on the middle cushion with Rory on his other side. Harbor and Dagen had turned the leather chairs in front of Vidar’s desk around to face them, and Rocco was leaning against the wall next to the door. Magnus had assured Vi it was okay to let Rocco in. He knew the whole story already, anyway. Kayla had squeezed him tight, and he’d only had to whisper, “Nolan,” in her ear for her to understand what was happening. He’d promised to fill her in and told her he might need a major after brunch cuddle session this weekend.

  Magnus looked around the room at all the eyes trained on him and felt a flush sweep over him, and he licked his lips. Rory’s eyes were so full of concern. Everyone else already knew the original story, or at least most of it, but Rory was walking in blind. At the urging of his therapist, Magnus had finally broken down just before Christmas and told his brothers that he’d been sexually assaulted by the man he’d been in a relationship with. It had been both the most terrifying and freeing experience of his life. His mom and Kayla had known since before he moved back home, but Rory...telling Rory wasn’t the same as telling all of them.

  Rory had been his lover. And he desperately wanted them to get back to that point. He wanted to build a life with Rory.

  Glancing around quickly again, Magnus cleared his throat. “Actually...um, could you guys give us a few minutes?” No one even looked surprised. Then Rocco spoke up quietly from his place by the door. “Magnus, I can fill them in if you don’t want to go over it twice.”

  “Yeah. That would be great actually. Thanks, Rocco.” Magnus nodded at his old friend, and Rocco gave him a tight-lipped smile before opening the door and stepping out of the room.

  Vidar laid a hand on Magnus’s arm, giving it a light squeeze. “We’ll be in my tattoo room if you need us.” Then Vidar shot a look at Rory that Magnus couldn’t parse, but Rory nodded before bringing his gorgeous eyes back to Magnus’s face and reaching for his hand.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The suspense was killing Rory, but at the same time he was clinging on to the few minutes he had left without the knowledge of whatever had put that broken look on Magnus’s face and the full fire of wrath in not only Vidar’s eyes, but Harbor and Dagen’s, as well. Knowing that whatever Magnus had to tell him would likely ignite the same rage inside him, but more concerned with the toll it was all taking on Magnus. He wanted to wrap him up like Vidar had, only pulling him even closer and covering him in kisses, but he wasn’t sure that was what Magnus needed. And more than anything, in that moment, he wanted to be whatever Magnus needed. Wanted to be strong enough that Magnus knew he could lean on Rory. That Rory wasn’t going anywhere.

  When the door closed behind the other Rourke’s and Rocco, Magnus let out a derisive little chuckle and turned, pulling his legs up under himself on the couch so that he faced Rory. Magnus looked down at their joined hands, his thumb idly gliding over Rory’s knuckles, catching on the rough dry patches because he detested the feel of lotion and only used it when his skin finally lost the battle and began to crack and bleed.

  “I don’t know where to start,” Magnus finally said, eyes still focused on their hands.

  Rory steeled himself and reached for Magnus’s other hand, turning himself slightly on the couch with their clasped hands between them. “Just rip the band aid off, Magnus.”

  “I was raped when I was living in California. It’s one of the reasons I came back home.”

  Rory barely stopped himself from visibly flinching. He heard the words, understood their meaning, but every cell of his body recoiled at the reality of them. No. This couldn’t be happening. Not to Magnus. His Magnus. His mind flooded with images, scenarios, horrible things, and he clenched his eyes shut against them. A gentle touch on his face pulled him back from his head, and he opened his eyes to find Magnus watching him.

  Rory sucked in a shuddering breath. He tasted blood. With the hand that Magnus had released, he touched his lip and came away with fingers stained red. He tried to find words, but what could he say? He was sorry? He was. He wanted to kill whoever had done that to Magnus? He did. It didn’t for one second change the way he felt about Magnus? It didn’t. He raked his eyes over Magnus’s face, searching for what Magnus needed from him. He could have it all.

  “Tell me what you need, Maggie. I’m so sorry that happened to you. I can’t…” There weren’t words.

  “It’s okay.”

  Rory shook his head. In no way was any of this okay.

  “Listen,” Magnus said, moving closer, comforting him when he should be the one comforting Magnus. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before, but we weren’t in the best place, and then we’ve only just gotten started again, and I wanted to wait until things had settled a bit. I only told my brothers just before Christmas.”

  “Magnus, you don’t have to explain that to me. I’m glad you’re telling me now, but I understand why you didn’t before.” Then a thought occurred to Rory. “What happened today?”

  Magnus sighed, leaning his shoulder more fully against the back of the couch and dropping his head. “He’s here. My ex. The one who…”

  Rory needed to move. To hit something. Then Magnus started talking again, and he forced himself to stay put and still, clinging to Magnus’s hands like they were his tether to sanity.

  “I started dating Nolan a couple years after I moved out there. He was...charming and funny. He was one of the owners at the studio I worked for. A couple of the other models tried to warn me off from him, but I didn’t listen.” Magnus scoffed. “I thought they were jealous.”

  Rory lifted one hand to cradle Magnus’s face. He needed to see his eyes. “You couldn’t have known.”

  “But I could have been smarter.”

  “What happened?”

  “He was…” Magnus squirmed like he was uncomfortable. “A little rough and dominating...in bed, but not too much so I went with it, but then he started getting really possessive outside of the bedroom and wanting to have sex after every shoot I did. Like immediately after.” Magnus bit his lip. Rory warred with himself to keep the instant stab of jealousy under control. This was all in the past, and he was not going to be a selfish asshole and make this horrific experience that Magnus had lived through about him. “I could normally...appease him in other ways, but one night I came home after a twelve-hour day on set just exhausted and sore.” Magnus grimaced, his face turning pink, and Rory squeezed his hands in silent reassurance. “That night...I told him no, but he didn’t listen.” Magnus was quiet for a moment before continuing, “He said, ‘what’s the use of having a porn star boyfriend if I can’t fuck you whenever I want?’ I knew he didn’t love me. I’d always known it, but that was when I realized he never even saw me as a person. Not really.” Magnus shook his head. “I left that night, stayed with a friend for a few days, and that’s when his crazy really came to light. He
stalked me. He called obsessively. When I went back to get my things, he hit me and tried to rape me again. Thankfully, I’d brought a friend and a can of mace with me. I got a restraining order, but I was scared all the time. So, I decided to come home.”

  Magnus sat quietly, holding Rory’s hands and watching him digest everything Magnus had just told him. It was a lot to take in, and Magnus wondered how Rory would react once he’d had a moment to process. When he’d told his brothers, it had gone mostly like he’d expected it to. Dagen had hugged him for a long time, gentle and solid as always. Vidar had seethed and held him so tightly that he thought he’d have bruises. Harbor had put a hole through their mom’s garage wall, and then cried when he’d pulled Magnus into his arms. He thought Rory might be a combination of all three.

  “Will you tell me what you’re thinking?” Magnus asked when he couldn’t take the quiet anymore. Hearing that Nolan was here in Cincinnati had thrown him, and he was still processing, but he felt lighter than he had in a long while having shared this with Rory. He had always planned to if things continued to grow between them, and while he resented the fact that his choice of timing had been taken from him, he couldn’t find it in himself to be upset that Rory knew now.

  Rory nodded, a shine taking over his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Magnus.” He shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know what to say. There are no words...can I hold you?”

  Magnus nearly sobbed. “Yes,” he said, and before Rory could move, he rose up on his knees and straddled Rory’s lap, wrapping his arms around Rory’s shoulders and burying his face against Rory’s neck. “I was so afraid to tell you. Afraid you wouldn’t want me anymore.”

  Rory’s already tight hold got even tighter, and his words came out on a growl, “Never. That will never happen.”

  Something broke in Magnus at that, and the tears he hadn’t shed since Rocco told him Nolan had followed him across the country poured down his face, but there was something he needed to know. He pulled back enough to see Rory’s face. “Then why? Why did you leave me? I know you had to take care of your family, but you shouldn’t have had to do that alone. I wanted to go with you.”

  Rory’s face was blurry through his tears, and when he cupped Magnus’s face, his thumbs brushing away Magnus’s tears, his words were gentle. “We don’t have to do this now. You have enough on—”

  “No.” Magnus stopped him. “Please tell me the real reason. I know what you said, on the phone...about not wanting to hold me back but—”

  “My grandfather killed my uncle.”

  That stopped Magnus cold. He didn’t even know Rory had had an uncle. The shock of those words stopping his tears and stealing his breath. “I guess when Caleb, my mum’s brother, came out as gay, my grandfather threw him out of the house. My mum always resented him for that, but when my dad died and she couldn’t support us anymore, granddad offered to take us in and pay off the debt when I was sixteen, remember?”

  Magnus nodded, letting his hands rest on Rory’s chest and taking comfort in the steady beat of the heart he could feel beneath his palm.

  “Before we got on the plane, Mum took me aside and made me swear to never let granddad find out I was gay. She made me swear on my dad’s memory. I was so surprised when I came back here after I turned eighteen that she decided to stay. Although, I think it was more for her other family than him. She was so mired in her pain, and though I didn’t realize it at the time, the bottle had already taken hold.”

  Magnus could feel his heart breaking. Rory had known so much loss. Losing his father when they’d barely been in their teens had taken a hard toll on Rory and his mother. That loss, Magnus thought, was what had eventually taken Rory’s mother from him, too.

  “When she called to ask for my help, to ask me to come back, I wanted you to go with me. I did Magnus, but you’d only just turned eighteen, and I was lucky Stella was letting us be together in the first place. And my mum was insistent that I keep the promise I’d made. Leaving you was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, but it was true what I said. I did think I might be holding you back. You’d just gotten that modeling contract and were so excited about doing your photo shoots and traveling.” Rory shook his head. “I couldn’t take that away from you, and I knew that if I didn’t end things when I left, that modeling contract or not…” Rory’s eyes met his and the look in them both invigorated and settled Magnus at the same time. It was so full of love—of awe—even all these years later. Rory’s hands slid around his sides, rubbing gentle circles into his lower back. “I knew you’d follow me. And one glance at you...well, I wouldn’t have been hiding anything for long.”

  Magnus sniffed and a chuckle broke free despite him. “How did you find out about your uncle?”

  Rory sobered and settled his hands-on Magnus’s hips. “As granddad got worse, his mind started to go and he...would call me Caleb. I guess I look like him, and the worse granddad got...the worse things he started to say. Mum hadn’t known. She’d thought he’d just kicked him out, but that...I think that broke her. She was gone six months after he passed.”

  “I remember,” Magnus whispered.

  Rory nodded. “The flowers you sent were beautiful.”

  “I wanted to be there with you.”

  “I know, baby. I had you here.” Rory placed a hand over the one Magnus had on his chest.

  “Rory…” Magnus’s voice was a small, broken thing. A plea.

  Leaning in, Rory hesitated only a moment, eyes raking over Magnus’s face before sealing their mouths together. Magnus whimpered. All of the emotion and turmoil of the day crashing over him and pouring out where his lips were fused to Rory’s. “Will you take me home?”

  “Your brothers…”

  “We can talk to them later. I just...I need you.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Magnus had made quick arrangements for Chelsea to close the club that night, and Rocco had agreed to go and keep an eye on things. Rory was glad, because all he could hear was Magnus saying those three words, I need you. The Rourke’s weren’t particularly happy, but they’d all agreed to meet the next day to talk about what Magnus should do about Nolan going forward. Vidar had clasped Rory’s shoulder as they were leaving Open Wounds and said to him the same thing he’d said all those years ago when Rory and Magnus started dating. “Take care of him.”

  Rory had nodded, meeting Vidar’s gaze with the surety pulsing through his veins that no matter what, from now on, he would be at Magnus’s side unless Magnus sent him away. And Rory didn’t think that was going to happen. With Magnus’s hand in his, he finally felt like he was where he needed to be. Where he should have been all along and that there was no one way they’d ever let anything or anyone come between them again. The rage he felt at Magnus’s admission about what Nolan had done to him was simmering at the back of his mind, but right now, his sole focus was Magnus and what Magnus needed from him.

  He’d started to steer Magnus’s Shelby towards downtown and Magnus’s apartment, but Magnus had shaken his head. “Can we go to your house?”

  That was how they’d ended up standing in his bedroom of what once had been his childhood home. When Rory moved back to the States after his granddad and mother both passed, he’d been surprised to find their old house back on the market. At first, he hadn’t thought that he’d be able to live there. Too many memories and ghosts, but he couldn’t put it from his mind. After he bought it, he remodeled the inside, doing most of the work himself, and somehow rebuilding this house had helped him rebuild his heart. And now the final piece was standing just across the room, looking over the pictures Rory had on one of his book shelves.

  Magnus had basically dragged him through the house, pausing only to slip off his shoes and to tell Rory, with no small bit of awe in his voice, that he loved the work he’d done to the house. Rory was quite proud of the way the house had turned out. He’d laid dark hardwood throughout the house and painted most of the walls in varying shades of gray. But once they’d crossed th
e threshold into Rory’s bedroom, Magnus had gone quiet, dropping his hand and walking around to look at the crammed bookshelf and everywhere but at Rory.

  Rory let him linger. They had all the time in the world, and if all Magnus wanted from him tonight, or every night, was to talk and simply be together that would be more than enough for him.

  Magnus gasped, drawing Rory’s eyes to where his hand was reaching past one of the larger frames with a picture of Rory’s parents to a smaller one near the back. Rory knew what it was before Magnus lifted the small frame from its spot, but he still held his breath, watching Magnus closely while he inspected the pictures inside.

  “You were so cute that day,” Magnus said, a finger tracing over the glass of the picture frame.

  Rory smiled. “So were you.”

  Magnus chuckled, looking over at him. “But you were so nervous and such a gentleman. Holding open the gate to every carnival ride for me and winning me that stuffed dragon.”

  Rory felt the tips of his ears go pink. It had been their first “date.” The county fair was hardly date worthy, but at the time, it had seemed larger than life, and he’d been so happy to be there with Magnus. “I think…” Rory started before pausing a moment. “I think I already knew I loved you. We were kids, and I know first loves aren’t normally the ones that last, but Magnus, I swear...I think I knew even then that I’d love you for the rest of my life.”

  Magnus nodded, looking back down at the picture, then walked to him, holding the frame out for Rory to take. Rory did, his brow furrowing in confusion until Magnus reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. He slid a piece of paper out and held it up for Rory to see. It was the other half of that photo strip, the edges worried and the images faded. They’d split them that day, Magnus taking two and Rory taking two. Rory’s half lived in the frame he was clutching in his now shaking hand, and it looked like Magnus had been carrying his half with him in his back pocket all this time.