Beautiful Ugly

by Shelia E. Bell

  Kacie slipped into a pair of crystal blue leggings and an oversized matching top. Not a minute too soon, because she heard Deacon’s key turning in the door leading from the garage into the hallway. Deacon rushed up behind Kacie and swooped her off her feet until she faced his stare. “Umph, umph, umph. You are drop dead gorgeous. You know that?” He smothered her in kisses starting with her ear and whispered a string of sexual innuendos while he continued to embrace her and sit her down on the sofa.

  It didn’t take long for the couple’s need for satisfaction to take over. Their eyes met, their breath grew louder and heavier, and Deacon made himself more familiar with the one underneath his weight. Sounds of passion traveled through the vents and up and down the hallway of the house. Enjoying to the fullest Deacon’s expert lovemaking, Kacie had no doubt that he would be in seventh heaven when she told him the news.

  Holding her against his sweaty, spent body on the narrow black printed sofa, Deacon nibbled on her ear until Kacie eased back as much as she could. “Come on, let’s take a bubble bath.” She jumped up and giggled while running through the house in her birthday suit. Deacon lay back for a few minutes until his strength returned.

  “Come on,” Kacie yelled from the back bedroom.

  “Hold it down, woman, before you wake up Keshena,” Deacon answered back and strode his lean, chiseled body to Kacie’s bedroom. She gasped at the sign of his returning desire. “Uh-ah. Not until you get in this bath.

  “So it’s like that, huh?”

  “Yep, certainly is.” She stood at the side of the master bath and stretched out her hand. Deacon followed. He patted her on the butt, and Kacie squealed.

  Soaping each other down in the garden tub, Kacie turned, then laid her braided hair against Deacon’s chest. “I have some good news,” she said, feeling like she was in seventh heaven.

  “Umm,” he moaned softly as his body pressed against the small of her lower back.

  “Deacon, you know I love you, right?” she said in a serious voice, but without turning around to face him.

  “Uh-oh, sounds like an episode from the Maury Show. But yeah, I know you love me, sweetness. What’s up? Where is all of this gooey stuff coming from?”

  “I know you haven’t told me that you love me, but you do, don’t you?” For just a while, Kacie was afraid of what Deacon’s answer might be. She shifted slightly and titled her head back so she could see Deacon’s expression.

  “Sure, you know that goes without saying. I’m not big on words. I like to show you how I feel about you. And I thought I did just that.”

  “Baby, of course you do. You’ve shown me in the most special way a man can. And a woman for that matter.”

  “What are you talking about?” Deacon sat up slightly in the tub and swung her around so he could see Kacie’s face like he was sizing her up. A spot of soap was on her check and on her forehead. He grinned, and then kissed the soap off of her jaw.

  Kacie took hold of his free hand. It was massive. He eased the other one under the warm bubbling water, almost taking her mind off what she was about to tell him. A gentle, low moan pierced her lips and she bit her bottom lip lightly and twisted her butt against the soapy tub surface. Barely able to speak, she managed to say, “Deacon, baby,” again she moaned. There was no turning back. Deacon had her where he wanted her. She was under his spell, and until she released her desire, there would be no use in trying to tell Deacon anything.

  Stepping out of the tub, Deacon grabbed the bath towel and began drying off while Kacie followed and did the same. Deacon had a way of getting her to succumb to him. When she was with him, she got a thrill. She lost control, and her world was all about the man she loved. But nevertheless, Kacie understood that she had to find a way to tell him about their love child.

  “I’m going to the office,” Deacon told her after he finished dressing. I have a meeting at ten this morning, and then an afternoon meeting with some prospective clients. I won’t get a chance to talk to you until later this evening, so don’t go worrying about me. He pecked a robed Kacie on her wet hair, then her lips.

  He leaned against the bedroom door frame and looked at her intently. “Hey, you all right?” he asked her.

  Pausing at first, Kacie thought she ought to just come right out and tell him. But on second thought hesitated, believing that it wouldn’t be such a good idea to share such a personal thing with him when he was on his way to an important meeting. No, she had plenty of time to tell him.

  “Yes, I’m fine. I’m just drained. You do me good, Deacon,” she moaned and kissed him at the door. “You do me real good. Now get to work. Call me when you can,” she said through a yawn.

  “You get you some sleep, precious. Sweet daddy will talk to you later.” He straightened his camel colored three button Italian wool suit that seemed formed for his perfect body.

  Kacie’s cheeks turned colors. “I will, but only if you leave now before I pull you back inside of here and strip you out of that suit, boy.”

  “I can’t let that happen, you’ll get me fired. Look, for real, I’m outta here.” Deacon strolled in his sexy stride until he reached his car. Kacie stood in the door until she saw his car take off and race out of sight. Touching her stomach, she caressed it again. “Don’t worry. Momma’s got everything under control. Don’t you worry about a thing.” Kacie turned, closed the security door behind her and went to take Deacon’s advice. She slept until an hour or so later, when Keshena stood in her crib and began to cry to get out of it.

  The remainder of Kacie’s day was great. She’d been with the man she loved and everything for now was good in her world. She busied herself cleaning the house. She was going to work for four hours today, so she prepared the kids a light meal for them to have when they got home from school.

  Afternoon came quickly. The kids came in from school, and Kacie passed off Keshena to Kassandra. “Y’all be sure to get your homework done. Dinner’s on the stove, and remember, no cooking unless it’s something you’re warming up in the microwave. I should be back home by 9:30 tonight. Bye now,” she told them and hugged them one by one.

  Her cell phone rang just as soon as she got in her car and backed out of the driveway. “Hello.”

  “Hey, I just called you at home, but no one answered.”

  “I know. I was so glad to see you this morning that I forgot to tell you I had to work this evening. I’m on my way there now.”

  “And the kids?”

  “Deacon, you know the kids aren’t allowed to answer the phone when I’m not there, unless they look on the caller ID and see that it’s me.”

  “I know that, but I’m talking about them being at home by themselves.”

  “My kids are trained. They know what to do. I cannot afford to pay three hundred bucks a week for someone to keep my kids for a few hours a day. It’s ridiculous, highway robbery. They know how to call me on my cell phone, and I work only five minutes from home. So now that we have that understood, tell me the real reason you called.”

  “I just got hold to some tickets.”

  “Tickets? What kind of tickets?” Kacie asked as she made the turn into the store’s parking lot where she worked.

  “A stage play. It’s this Friday night. Do you want to go with me?”

  “A play? What kind of play?” Kacie asked.

  “I heard it’s an outstanding Christian themed play made from a novel.

  “Oh, yeah, I think I’ve seen previews about it on television. It does look like it’s going to be good. I’d love to go.” Kacie’s voice rang with pure excitement.

  “Great.” Deacon sent a kissing sound to her through the phone. “Let me get back to work. Remember I have a trustee’s meeting at church tonight. Say a prayer for me. I think Pastor may talk about inducting me as one of the trustees. One of the other deacons gave me a heads up.” Deacon sat on the edge of his desk.

  “Wow! That would be great, honey. You’ve been committed to Cummings Street a long time, and you dese
rve the position.” Kacie suddenly started laughing uncontrollably.

  “What’s so funny?” Deacon asked.

  “I was just thinking. What are they going to call you? Your name is already Deacon.” She continued laughing. “I guess they’ll say Trustee Deacon Riggs.”

  Deacon laughed too. “You are too silly. I'm glad I have you in my corner.” His voice revealed surety and confidence. “Bye-bye.”

  “Deacon, hold up,” Kacie nervously said.

  “What is it, baby?”

  “I, I’d like to talk to you about something. But it can wait until we talk later.”

  “Okay, but I may not talk to you tonight, so don’t get bent out of shape. I don’t know how long tonight’s meeting is going to last.”

  “Sure, that’s fine. I love you,” said Kacie.

  Deacon hung up the phone without responding.

  Chapter Ten

  A person is only beautiful, when their own beauty, is reflecting on to others. Tara Grady

  Layla returned home from choir rehearsal like she’d performed eight hours of hard labor. Like most Tuesday nights, rehearsal was full of drama. Soloists argued over who would lead the new song. Some of the members thought that Layla led too many of the songs, and maybe she did. But it wasn’t their decision to make; it was the director’s. After two hours of practicing and bickering, another choir member took her home after rehearsal was over. Layla was delighted when she stepped into the sanctity of her apartment.

  She turned the key to the door and stepped inside to the warmth of her apartment. It wasn’t too cold outside, but it was easy for anyone to know that fall was about to give way to winter. She slipped out of her pantsuit and into a warm shower. Her weight had plummeted an additional twenty-eight pounds. She felt better physically than she had in a long time. If only she could forget the reason she was losing the weight so fast, then she would be so much better mentally and emotionally. She knelt down on her knees next to her double bed and folded her hands in prayer.

  “God, my Father, thank you for every good and perfect gift you’ve given me. Thank you for loving me even when I don’t love myself. Thank you for my family and friends, my church and my pastor. Lord, I ask you to watch over those who are homeless, sick, and in prison. Forgive me for my shortcomings and for my sins. Forgive me for still holding on to my past and the fears of the terrible crime Mike did to me. Help me to learn how to forgive him like you have forgiven me countless times. Help me to remember that you saved my life for a purpose and that you have not given me a spirit of fear, Father. You said that I should not fear what man can do to me, Lord, so please remove the fearful thoughts from my mind. Make me to be the person you want me to be. Amen.” Struggling to pull herself up, she stopped and allowed herself to rest back on her knees. “And God, there’s one more thing I want to ask you. I do want a man in my life if it is your will. Not just any man, Lord. I want a man who loves me for me and who I love too. Amen.” She used the bed to help her get up off her knees and climb into bed. The cool sheets felt good against her skin and mixed with the warmth inside her apartment. She was able to fall asleep quickly.

  “Layla, are you ready? We’re going to be late, baby.”

  “Honey, here I come. I had to put on the last touch of make-up.”

  “How many times have I told you that you’re beautiful just the way you are?” The man walked up to her, gathered her tenderly in his arms and held her snugly. Layla felt his heart beating against her full chest. When he reluctantly pulled away, she caught the heart rendering stare of his gaze and the pull of his sexual magnetism aroused a sense of urgency inside of her.

  “Baby, you just said you don’t want us to be late.” She could hardly speak.

  “I know what I said, but I can’t help it. You do this to me every time. Layla, I’m so thankful you came into my life. Who would have thought that our lives would turn out like this? I love you, girl.”

  “Don’t you know I’ve waited on someone to say those words to me for such a long time? I prayed to God for a man like you.” A knot rose in her throat. Her body trembled. “I love you too.

  He stopped her words by moving his mouth over hers, demanding more of her. In return, Layla gave in to the passion of his kiss and the heat of his touch as he explored her body.

  “Baby, baby,” she spoke in a whisper. When she opened her eyes, she looked around sleepily. Her heart beat wildly, and her gown clung to her moist skin. Layla eased herself up in the bed once she became fully aware that she had been dreaming. She turned over on her side and opened the drawer next to the bed. She pulled out a chocolate candy bar and took one nibble from it before she threw it in the waste basket next to her bed. Her mind slowly relived the memories of her dream.

  ×

  The following early afternoon, Layla saw the mail truck headed down her street. She had gotten up early, bathed, and dressed herself. The shawl collar sweater and one-pocket jeans gave her a boost of self confidence. She opened her front door and walked down the walkway like she was going to visit a neighbor.

  The postman pulled up beside her and got out of his vehicle. “Hello.” His voice was as charming as she’d dreamed about last night. He placed a couple of pieces of mail in the mailbox he passed, but continued to walk along side her.

  “Hello.” She tried her best to act flippantly, but was sure it wasn’t working.

  “You look lovely today, Miss, uh, uh, don’t tell me. Hobbs. Right?”

  Impressed, Layla stopped in her tracks, and for the first time she really, really looked at him. It was as if she felt blood surging from her finger tips to her toes. “You’re right. But too bad I don’t have the same privilege.”

  “The same privilege? And what exactly does that mean?” He flashed a beguiling smile and snapped his fingers. “Oh, I get it. You don’t know my name. May I start over?”

  “Start over?” It was her time to look on him in amusement.

  “Yes. Let me introduce myself. I’m Dennis, your friendly neighborhood postman.” He grinned. This time his even, near perfect white teeth transfixed her. “Dennis Parker.”

  She extended her hand out to his. “It’s nice to meet you, Dennis.”

  “May I ask where you’re headed?”

  “Oh, nowhere in particular. I decided since the day is so beautiful that I’d take a walk. It’s not too cold or too windy, and I wanted to get out of the house for a while.”

  “Oh, I see. If I’m not being too presumptuous, I thought you lived in another apartment on the other side of town.”

  Layla stood still again. “I think you are being a little nosy.”

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be. It’s just that I notice that your mail is no longer coming to that complex, and I thought I remembered your name when I put your mail in the box, that’s all. I didn’t mean any harm.” He looked truly sorrowful; so much so that Layla felt bad for coming off so strong, but she was not going to take a chance with anyone – not after Mike.

  “I moved over here not long ago.”

  “Oh, I see. This is my regular route, so I hope to see you more often,” he said with a beautiful smile.

  Layla said nothing. She turned around and went back inside her house. Her heart raced and she felt a light twinge in her stomach, which happened from time to time since the shooting.

  “Hey, Layla”

  She turned around before disappearing from her balcony. “Yes?”

  Hey, I forgot something.”

  “What?”

  “Your phone number.” he answered. Layla obliged. He put it in his phone and turned to walk away. “I usually take my lunch when I finish this route. I thought if you didn’t have anyone to report to at home, that you might let me take you to lunch.”

  Did he say lunch? No he didn’t just ask me to go out with him? Oh, my gosh! “How long will it be before you finish your route?”

  “A couple of hours.”

  After placing her finger over her lips, Layla finally spoke. “I
really would like to, Dennis, but I already have some other plans. What about a rain check?” She couldn’t believe she’d said that.

  “Okay, I’ll call you.”

  Chapter Eleven

  I’m stronger, I’m wiser, I’m better. Marvin Sapp

  Since the horrible shooting, Layla had lost thirty pounds in one month. Her appetite had diminished dramatically since they removed part of her stomach and intestines. She often became queasy if she tried to eat more than her stomach could hold. Layla looked at herself in the mirror and thought about Dennis’ offer to take her to lunch. She wanted to say yes, but the other part of her wasn’t quite ready to trust in a man again. She switched her focus from Dennis to God.

  Continuing to converse with the person in the mirror, Layla said, “God, thank you for saving my life. Thank you for taking a bad situation and making it work for my good. I’m healthier, I’m stronger, and I’m wiser. I owe it all to you, Lord.”

  +

  “It’s going to be fun having a girl’s night out.” Kacie laughed as the three friends chattered away on the phone, on three-way. “Seems like forever since the three of us have been able to hang out together just for fun. So I say, before we go to the Orpheum to see that play, and since we are going to be downtown, let’s do some wild and crazy shopping for you, Layla. You need to show off that new figure. Who knows; you just might see Mr. Postman again one day.” This time Envy and Layla laughed along with Kacie.

  Envy added, “Now you’re talking with sense. I agree. Layla, we are going to get your shop on, baby.”

  “All right, since y’all insist,” screamed Layla into the phone. “Y’all know something?” She paused.

  “Naw, but I bet you’re about to tell us,” chuckled Kacie.