Gertrude

by Kirsten Osbourne

  “I’m not feeling well!” Gertrude called through the door. “I’m not going to eat tonight.”

  “Are you sure? I can bring you a plate,” Katie responded, concerned. It was unusual for any of the girls to miss dinner, but especially Gertrude. She was always diligent about sticking to plans and routines.

  “No, thank you,” Gertrude replied softly. She heard Katie’s footsteps on the stairs as her sister went back into the kitchen with the rest of the family. Gertrude wasn’t hungry.

  The next day, Gertrude didn’t want to get out of bed. She was normally an early riser and excited to start her daily routines, but she found herself wishing she didn’t have to go to the library. Since Nowhere was such a small town, however, there were no other librarians. Gertrude was the only staff member.

  She considered sending word that she was ill and that the library would be closed for the day. If she did that, though, the mayor might take it as a sign that the library really should be closed for good. And she would have felt terrible, knowing she wasn’t really sick. Still, the thought of going to the library and having to see and hear Jedediah Thorn all day made her feel like crying.

  Gertrude washed her face and brushed her teeth and tried to prepare for the day ahead of her. She walked to the library, desperately thinking about ways she could save the library. If only there was a way to convince the mayor that the library’s presence in the town was vital. Then he wouldn’t vote to close it. And if she had the mayor’s support in addition to Cletus’s support, the rest of the elected officials were sure to follow.

  But how would she explain it to the mayor?

  The day passed quickly. Gertrude had only one patron, Harris, who came in the morning to study, went back to his house for lunch, and returned in the afternoon to read more texts. If the attendance continued this way, no wonder the mayor was considering closing the library.

  Gertrude watched through the window as she saw Jed speaking animatedly to many of her former library patrons. They were admiring his selection of books. That made Gertrude pause. How did Jed get all of his books? It was rather odd how he managed to have such a broad selection that fit inside a wagon.

  Gertrude shook her head. She needed to focus on the library, not Jed Thorn. But naturally, she couldn’t help but stare at his broad shoulders, dark hair, and strong chin and imagine what it would feel like to be held and kissed by him.

  By the late afternoon, Gertrude was no closer to saving the library. She walked toward the Sanders home dejectedly. She saw Jed grooming one of his horses. She didn’t know why, but she walked over to him.

  Jed’s face was surprised, but he smiled as Gertrude approached. “Hello, Miss Sanders.”

  “Hello, Mr. Thorn.” Gertrude felt suddenly shy.

  “Shaping up to be a beautiful night, isn’t it?” Jed asked. Though the temperatures were cool that time of year, there was a gentle breeze and plenty of light.

  Gertrude wasn’t sure what to say. “The town may close the library.”

  “What?” Jed’s eyes were full of concern. He took a step closer to Gertrude. “Why is that?”

  Gertrude lowered her gaze. “Because no one is coming to the library anymore. They’re coming here instead.”

  Jed’s expression was a guilty one as he considered the information. “I’m so sorry, Gertrude. Please believe me when I tell you that was never my intention. I am so upset to learn that I may be responsible for causing you harm.”

  “That’s not really what’s important here, is it?” Gertrude snapped.

  Jed swallowed hard. He knew Gertrude would be a challenge. He liked her saucy nature, but sometimes her harsh words cut deep. “I’m very sorry. What can I do?”

  “You’ve done enough.” Gertrude tried to soften her tone. She knew the conversation wasn’t going well, but she didn’t know what else to do.

  “There must be something. Gertrude. I’ll do anything.” Jed’s earnest expression made Gertrude’s heart melt a little.

  Gertrude thought about this for a while. “Well, I know that I’m tired of arguing with you. Can we find some agreement so we don’t fight all the time?”

  Jed nodded eagerly. “Absolutely. I’ve been feeling the same way. You’re the only person in Nowhere who I care about impressing, Gertie.”

  “Let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves. It’s either Gertrude or Miss Sanders.” Gertrude raised an eyebrow.

  Jed flushed red. “Yes, you’re absolutely right, Miss Sanders. Won’t happen again.”

  Gertrude turned slightly so he wouldn’t see that her face was red, too. “I think if you went to the mayor and explained why Nowhere needs both a library and a book wagon, that could save the library. But I don’t know. It still might not work.”

  “Whatever it takes, Miss Sanders. I’ll do it.” Jed’s voice was resolute, and Gertrude believed him.

  “Okay, then. Thank you.” She felt strange speaking to him so formally.

  “You’re welcome. Please, let me walk you home.” Jed finished polishing his horse’s saddle and set down the tools he was using.

  Gertrude was torn. On one hand, she wanted Jed to walk her home, talk about marriage, and kiss her again. On the other, he was the same Jed that made her furious day in and day out, the man who was interfering with all of her work. After thinking about it for several moments, she told him, “All right, fine.”

  Jed walked slowly beside Gertrude for most of the walk home. When they were about halfway there, he pulled her aside.

  “My favorite part about Nowhere is seeing the stars.” Jed pointed to the night sky.

  Gertrude was confused. “You couldn’t see stars where you came from?”

  “I was raised in the city. You don’t see stars as clearly as you can out here. Everything here is a little quieter and friendlier. I’d like to stay here for a long time.” Jed looked deep into Gertrude’s eyes as he spoke.

  “But you have a traveling book wagon. What would it be if you didn’t travel to other places all the time?” Gertrude didn’t understand.

  “I have a feeling my traveling days are over. I’ve found the woman I’d like to hitch my oxen to.” Jed stepped closer toward Gertrude.

  “Oxen? You haven’t been talking to Edna Petunia, have you?” Gertrude tried to make a joke, but Jed didn’t laugh. His face was completely serious.

  “Ever since I met you, Gertrude Sanders, I’ve known you were the one for me. Please don’t make me beg you, because I will beg you. I’m not too proud. Marry me, Gertrude. I won’t be happy until you agree.” Jed beamed from ear to ear as he stared at Gertrude.

  It took everything Gertrude had not to leap into his arms and agree to his proposal. But her primary obligation was to the library and the people of Nowhere. “I can’t agree to that, Mr. Thorn. Not until I’m confident the library is not going anywhere.”

  Jed sighed. “I understand. You’re a good woman, Gertrude Sanders. Sometimes I wish you weren’t quite so principled.”

  Gertrude smiled. “What do you mean by that? Hopefully nothing improper?”

  “Oh, I’ve had many an improper thought about you, Gertrude.” Jed’s voice alone sent tingles up and down Gertrude’s spine. He slipped his hand into hers, and she felt a jolt through her entire body.

  “What are you doing?” Gertrude wanted him to keep holding and touching her, but she also knew it wasn’t appropriate.

  “I’m sorry, Gertrude. I know it’s not proper, but from the moment I met you, all I have been able to think about is holding your face in my hands and kissing you.” Jed leaned in closer to Gertrude. She felt her breath catch.

  “Is that right?” Gertrude whispered.

  Jed lowered his lips toward hers. “Absolutely.” Jed pushed his tongue between Gertrude’s lips, and she let out a small squeal of surprise.

  “Shhh!” Jed warned, his eyes dancing with mischief. “Don’t want to wake up the good citizens of Nowhere, now, do we?”

  Jed put his hands around Gertrude’s waist
and pressed up against her. It was all happening so fast. Gertrude pushed him back and stumbled away.

  “I’m sorry. I have to leave!” Gertrude cried, out of breath. She began rushing back to the Sanders house.

  “What? Please, don’t go!” Jed called. He raced after her. “At least let me finish walking you home.”

  Gertrude held her hands up to him. “No, no, I’m fine. I promise. Please. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  Jed sadly waved goodbye and walked back in the direction of his wagon.

  Gertrude tried to get her heart rate and breath back to normal. She needed time to think. Jed made her body feel things that she’d never felt before. Things that were wrong and inappropriate before marriage. She knew that marriage was an option. Jed had made that clear. But was he a suitable match for her?

  Gertrude knew it was a bit snobbish, especially since she had grown up in an orphanage, but she simply couldn’t imagine living with Jed in the book wagon. For one thing, it was quite small. It was quite a feat that all of Jed’s books and living supplies could fit in the wagon, let alone Gertrude. She wasn’t vain and didn’t have trunks of clothes and shoes like other young women of her age, but she did have some belongings, and there was no way they’d fit in that wagon.

  Then there was the problem of Jed’s easy, carefree nature. Gertrude had always thought that if she did marry, it would have to be to someone who was as by-the-book as she was. A good Christian man who gave thanks to God and played by the rules. She realized she didn’t even know if Jed attended church. She had never seen him at the local church where Micah presided, but she knew there were a few other churches in nearby towns. She made a note to ask Jed if he was a church-goer.

  Finally, there was the library. How could the small town of Nowhere have enough space for both a traditional library and a book wagon? And the music was yet another concern. If Gertrude married Jed, would he play music every day for the rest of their lives?

  Of course, there were also positives to consider when thinking about Jed. There were his strong arms and gentle hands, his broad shoulders, and his delicate lips. There was the way he made her feel and the way he made her laugh. There was the way that she felt when she was with him, like they could do anything together.

  But, Gertrude reminded herself, that all meant nothing if he couldn’t support her. She was attracted to Jed, and there was no denying it…but it seemed impossible that he could support a family on his income from the book wagon. And a man that didn’t live in a home had to have a few screws loose. Just look at Cletus!

  Gertrude arrived at the Sanders’ house before she knew it. She had been reviewing all of the different aspects of the situation so intently that she’d barely been aware of her surroundings. She was home, but she was more lost than ever.

  Chapter 6

  “It’s Gertrude. Please let me in!” Gertrude knocked on the doors to Jed’s wagon.

  It was before six in the morning, and Gertrude could hear Jed grumbling a bit as he moved around in the small wagon. A few moments later, he opened the door, rubbing his bleary eyes. “Gertrude? Come on in.”

  “No, thank you.” Gertrude’s tone was stiff and formal. “I have a few questions for you.”

  “All right. Let me pull some clothes on and come outside.”

  Gertrude was in shock. She couldn’t believe Jed would acknowledge that he wasn’t wearing any clothes, or that he had invited her into his wagon, knowing that he wasn’t wearing clothes. She was glad that Sarah Jane wasn’t there to see it. She was one of the more judgmental of Gertrude’s sisters, and she didn’t approve of any inappropriate premarital behavior or flirtation. Being in a room with a man without his pants…that would certainly have crossed the line.

  After more grumbling, Jed opened the door to the wagon and stepped out. He wore a wrinkled shirt, his usual brown pants, and had put on his hat to block the sun from his face. “Morning, Gertrude!” Jed smiled broadly.

  “First question, please tell me more about your faith. You haven’t mentioned it.”

  “Well, actually, when I spoke to your parents, I told them how I donate part of my income to my church. It’s about halfway between here and Austin. I know I should really start going to the local church, but that’s the church I was baptized in, so I have kept going back.” Jed’s answer was easy and honest.

  Gertrude felt a wave of relief wash over her. She was so grateful that Jed loved and worshipped God like she and her family did. There was absolutely no way she could ever marry a man who didn’t consider church a big part of his life.

  “Next question. Do you ever see yourself having children?” Gertrude hoped Jed would answer this question well, too.

  “I love children, you know that. I have so much fun with them. I’d love children of my own one day, but I’d want the space to raise them right. I don’t think a book wagon is going to be sufficient for that…or for my future wife, for that matter.” Jed’s eyes sparkled playfully.

  Gertrude realized she’d been holding her breath and exhaled. So far, Jed was passing her test with flying colors.

  “Where do all your books come from? And how do they all fit in that little wagon?” Gertrude stared at the wagon curiously. It still mystified her.

  Jed chuckled. “My books come from many of the places I’ve traveled to. As you know, I used to go from town to town. I’d make friends, and occasionally I write to them and they will send me books. They come from shops and libraries and mercantiles. That’s how I have such a great variety.”

  Gertrude frowned as she looked at the wagon. “But the wagon is so small!”

  “I can show you if you’d like…” Jed said, standing closer to Gertrude and whispering in her ear. Gertrude shuddered as she felt his breath against her skin.

  “Not now. I have work to do.” Gertrude tried to speak as neutrally as possible, but she was shaking as she walked toward the library.

  Once she was safely inside, she took a few deep breaths, leaning against the front door. Jedediah Thorn had such a strong effect on her. She was worried that if she didn’t focus, the library would be doomed.

  The following day, Gertrude’s sister Betsy brought her children, Amy, David, Samuel, and Matthew to visit the library. She had adopted them; they were the younger siblings of her husband, Charles, whose parents had died tragically a few years back. Gertrude saw them coming and watched as they approached the building. To her dismay, she watched as they began crowding around Jed’s book wagon and exclaiming over the selection.

  No one was in the library, so Gertrude came running out to greet them. “Hello, children! Hello, Betsy! Why don’t we all come this way…”

  “Will you teach me how to play the banjo?” Amy asked Jed. “My mama used to play the piano, but she lives in heaven now so I have a new mama.”

  Jed bent down on his knee so he could speak to Amy at eye level. “I’m sorry to hear that your mother is in heaven. But I’m glad you have someone who is taking care of you.”

  “I’m Betsy Brooks. Nice to meet you.” Betsy extended a hand, and Jed shook it.

  “Jedediah Thorn. Pleasure’s all mine. Are you any relation to Gertrude? It seems every young lady I’ve met around that age is one of her sisters.” Jed looked back and forth between Gertrude and Betsy.

  “Yes and no.” Betsy laughed. “We are sisters, but we’re both adopted. We were both orphans in New York.”

  “I see. That explains why you don’t look very much alike.” Jed turned his attention to Amy. “Now, let’s see how you like to play the banjo!” He held the instrument in front of her and allowed her to pluck some of the strings.

  “This is fun!” Amy declared. “Do you think they have banjos in heaven? I think my mama would have liked this very much.”

  Jed stared at the sweet little girl in amazement. “I think they do have banjos in heaven, Amy. I think they do.”

  “Well, we should go inside the library now. Betsy and the children came to visit me.” Gertrude gestured towa
rd the library, but David and Samuel were examining a thick book together.

  “It’s a big book of plants, with all their names and pictures!” Samuel cried.

  “Can we get it?” David asked Betsy.

  “That depends. Mr. Thorn, how much is this book?” Betsy picked it up and ran her finger across the book’s hardcover.

  “Five cents, ma’am,” Jed said, winking at David and Samuel.

  “Thank you. We’ll take it.”

  “Really, we should be getting into the library.” Gertrude felt annoyed. Not only were Betsy and the children spending time with Jed and the book wagon, but they were supporting his business!

  “Mama, can I stay here while you visit Auntie Gertrude in the library?” Amy asked. Gertrude had to admit, she was absolutely adorable. It would be difficult to say no to her little face.

  But she had to. “No, Amy, we’re all going into the library.” Gertrude took Amy’s hand and David’s hand and began walking. Samuel, Matthew, and Betsy followed close behind.

  When they got into the library, Gertrude showed Amy to a small corner of the library where there was a chalkboard for practicing school lessons and some books for children her age. Matthew began looking through the stacks for a book he needed for school, and David and Samuel found some pens and pencils and began drawing at one of the tables.

  Once the children were focused on their own activities, Betsy grabbed Gertrude’s arm. “You didn’t tell me about the handsome book wagon man!”

  Gertrude blushed. “There’s nothing to tell.”

  Betsy stared at Gertrude. “I think there is. I saw the way he was looking at you! That wasn’t nothing.”

  Gertrude rolled her eyes. “Well, maybe there is a little attraction. But I don’t see how anything good can come from it. No one comes to the library any more because of the book wagon.”

  Betsy pointed to the sign that said patrons couldn’t borrow books if they also went to the book wagon. “With all due respect, isn’t that sign the reason no one is coming in here?”