Shattered Dreams (Moonchild)

by Walters, Janet Lane;

  “More like slug me. What about the Gerner twins?”

  “Vanished. Heard they joined the FBI or maybe the CIA.”

  “Helen Sloan?”

  “She married someone she met in college and divorced him three months later. Never heard why.”

  “Greg Paloni?”

  “Had his first book published a few months ago.”

  “Good for him. What’s the title?”

  Manon shrugged. “Something about murder. I seldom read for pleasure but the local bookstore will know.”

  Rafe put his half eaten roast beef sandwich on the plate. “What about Tom? You said he’s in town. Is he a teacher?”

  She nearly laughed. “Tom would never work with children. He’s an attorney with a local firm. Was practicing elsewhere but returned in January.”

  “Wonder why he came back.”

  Her spoon clattered on the table. “He said because I’m here.”

  “So he’s still interested.”

  “What do you think? No matter how often I say no, he returns to plague me with invitations and reminders.” She pushed her chair back. The remains of her lunch held no appeal. A different hunger rose. Desire, just like she’d felt in the past. Her gaze met his bringing urges she couldn’t admit. Letting Rafe into her life would drag past hurts into the present.

  “There should be a way to rid yourself of his harassing.”

  “There’s none when he won’t listen.”

  Rafe’s grin sent ripples of heat along her skin. “I can think of a way.”

  She didn’t want to hear. She couldn’t think of anyone else to speak about. Why wouldn’t one of her colleagues approach with a question that ended her panic?

  Her pager buzzed. Saved, she thought and checked the number. “I have to take this.” She dialed the lab. “Dr. Lockley, here. Good. Send Mr. Marshall’s to Employee Health and the others to my office.” She looked up. “Your lab results are normal. You’re cleared to work.”

  He chuckled. “Bit late. Though sitting in meetings is hardly work.”

  “Maybe being waylaid by Janice was.”

  Rafe’s laughter caused people to stare. “Hardly. I’m not interested in her idea of a welcome.”

  What Manon saw in his eyes raised questions she wouldn’t ask. He’d captured her interest again.

  Not good.

  Why did he have to be so damned sexy? A thought crept forward and begged for examination. Surely he hadn’t been alone for all those years. How many women had he charmed and dropped the way he had her? Another question she refused to ask.

  He finished his sandwich. “We need to talk.”

  The demand in his voice jolted her into the present. “There’s no reason I can see. You heard what I said yesterday. Strictly professional.”

  “Have dinner with me.”

  Manon hesitated and hated herself for the momentary lapse. Talk solved nothing. If they were alone, one kiss and they’d be off doing other things. Shattered dreams were beyond repair.

  “Dinner is out.”

  “Why?”

  “I have no desire to talk.” She drew a deep breath. “You’re new in town. Give yourself a chance to see what or who Fern Lake offers.”

  “I’m not looking for options. I want a chance to clear misunderstandings about the past. I won’t ask for more if you will listen.”

  But he was. She saw the way his blue eyes caressed her face. “I’ve no desire to look at what was a painful time.”

  With a finger he stroked circles on the back of her hand. Spirals of heat flowed from the touch, lighting feelings best forgotten.

  “There’s every reason to face the lies of the past. They shaped our present. I want to move forward. Don’t you?”

  “I have.” She looked around. Were people staring?”

  “Who told you I was dead?”

  “Probably my father.”

  “How did he learn?”

  “I haven’t the slightest idea. I haven’t dwelled on that time.” She stared at the table. Desire lapped at her determination to keep him at a distance. If they could forget the years of silence and just have a no strings affair, she would enjoy. All this talk about what had happened would stir anger and grief. She refused to live with those emotions again.

  She stood and lifted the tray. “Have to go. I’ve a full afternoon to make up for yesterday’s cancellations.”

  “Dinner tonight. You can choose the restaurant.”

  “You are persistent.”

  He nodded. “You’ve got that. What time?”

  She walked away. If she didn’t answer, he might get the idea. She’d lost him once and wasn’t about to face a second time when he decided to ride away.

  * * *

  Rafe watched Manon walk away. The sway of her hips and her tightly packed ass made him consider leaping to his feet, tossing her over his shoulders and carrying her to his apartment. Once there, they would make love and solve the mysteries of the past. When she knew the truth, how would she react?

  He half rose. His thought of abducting her formed an impossible fantasy. He sat down. Not a smart move. If he attempted such a tactic here, he would embarrass himself, especially when Manon hit him where it hurt.

  The major problem was the way she revved his engine. All he thought about was stroking her silky skin until she begged for completion. He drew a deep breath. Until they sorted truth from lies he couldn’t tell her he’d never stopped loving her or how he’d believed she’d vanished into a life he’d been unable to find. Today, she wouldn’t believe him. Perhaps she never would. That thought sent his spirits plunging into an abyss.

  With a groan he took his tray to the conveyer belt to the kitchen and rode the elevator to the fifth floor. In his office he spent some time studying floor plans. Then he pulled the policy and procedure book from the bookshelf. He looked through the pages, astonished by some policies that were more than twenty years old. The most recent one he found dated two years ago. He jotted a note on a pad on his desk. Committee needed.

  A tap on the door sounded. “Come in.”

  The gray-haired secretary appeared. “I have some work for you.”

  “Gran has mentioned how you kept her days organized. Good to see you’ll do the same for me.”

  She deposited a stack of paper on the desk. “July’s schedule for you to review. You’ll need to initial each one so I can make copies. Also a decision needs to be made regarding how to fill the uncovered shifts.”

  “How is this usually handled? I don’t want to bother Gran, ah, Mrs. Patton.”

  The older woman pressed her hands on the desk. “I’m sure this is one of the reasons she took sick. Happens every summer. Nurses threatening to quit unless they have the time they’ve requested for vacation.”

  Rafe drew a deep breath. “So how are those shifts usually covered?”

  “By posting an offer for those nurses who want extra shifts. There are always some who want overtime. Also by using the float pool.”

  Rafe studied the first page. “Threats aside, why were so many weeks of vacation permitted at the same time? He rubbed his forehead. “I’ll bring these to you later. Can you find copies of the requests for vacations?” He reached for the policy manual, searched the tabs and found the policy for vacations. Ten years old but the terms were clear and this schedule on his desk didn’t follow the rules. A change was due for August. He would have to deny requests. Sure wouldn’t help his popularity.

  The secretary returned with a stack of notebooks. Rafe studied the requests entered for July. Most mentioned the difficulty of finding child care. He nodded. Having some kind of day care would help. That was a Board decision. He wondered if other departments had the same problem with summer staffing.

  At four thirty, he left the office and went to the step-down unit. He dropped into the chair beside his step-grandmother’s bed. “How are you?”

  “Better. You look beat.”

  “I am.” He scowled. “Meetings dragged. To
o much paperwork and problems with staffing.”

  She nodded. “Vacations.”

  “Scheduling for the summer doesn’t follow policy. Why do you allow so many of the staff to take their four weeks in a block and add several personal days to the mix?”

  “We don’t want a dozen or more resignations.”

  “You’re too generous. If they leave and seek other employment, they’ll be working summers at those other hospitals.”

  “There’s a committee working on making changes but they get nowhere.” She closed her eyes.

  Rafe groaned. “The hospital should have child care available during the summer. I’ve seen it work elsewhere.”

  Mrs. Patton’s eyes flew open. “Good thought. Free?”

  He shook his head. “Subsidized. Is there a place on the grounds that could be used without too much expense?”

  “Several. The auditorium is seldom used. There’s also a one story building on the property that’s vacant. Talk to the heads of the lab, X-ray and Dietary.” She patted his hand. “So glad you’re here. Got so tired fighting. What are your plans for this evening?”

  Rafe grinned. “Paying a call on your doctor.”

  “Are you sure that’s a wise idea?”

  The concern in her voice warmed him. “The sooner she and I talk about the past, the quicker we can move forward.”

  “You could be right but be careful.”

  The phone rang. Rafe handed her the receiver.

  “Emma, how nice of you to call…Doing much better…He’s here.” Mar. Patton laughed. “I’ll tell him but I doubt he’ll listen…He is that…I’d love to see you.” She handed the receiver to Rafe.

  He arched a brow. “What are you going to tell me?”

  “You’re sizzling and you should leave Manon alone.”

  “Not going to happen.” Rafe rose. “We need to talk about what happened. I’m tired of treadmill emotions. Any idea where Manon lives?”

  “Yes.” She clasped his hand.

  “Tell me.”

  Her fingers tightened. “Not sure I should.”

  “Gran, please. I need to know. If I must I’ll find another way to learn.”

  “Don’t tell her I gave you the directions.”

  “Promise.”

  “Garden Street, red brick at the corner of the cul-de-sac. Take Main to Maple, turn left. The third left is Garden.” She squeezed his hand. “Are you sure dragging the past into the present will help? She’ll be crushed when she learns what her father threatened to do.”

  Rafe looked up. “Maybe not. She toured Europe with him and knows what he’s like.”

  “You’ll do what you must. Don’t hurt her and don’t let her hurt you. You did the only thing you could. You were still a child.”

  Those words produced a chuckle. “Not a child. Eighteen going on nineteen, Thought I was mature.” He kissed her cheek. “Hurry and get well so I can pick your brain about this place. When you’re better, you can head the policy and procedure committee. They will listen to you. I’m making a list of areas to examine.”

  “Thanks a lot. There’s already a committee.”

  “And you’re my choice to head the group. That book has policies twenty years old or older.” He paused in the doorway and blew a kiss. “See you.” Her laughter followed him to the stairs. He bounded to the first floor and the parking lot.

  As he started the bike, a plan unfolded. Manon had refused to go to dinner. Didn’t mean he couldn’t take the meal to her. He knew the perfect take-out place. He hoped the food remained as great as he remembered. As he rode to the apartment, he decided the idea was perfect and geared to push her into the past.

  After a shower and changing into jeans and a tee shirt, he donned his jacket and gloves. He rode the bike to Burger Bounty. Manon had always enjoyed the bacon blue cheeseburger and the giant potato fries.

  He parked in front of the shop. As he stepped inside, the rich aroma of frying meat reached him. Nothing had changed. A line of people, mostly young, waited to reach the counter. A half dozen tables lined one wall in the long room. He took his place and hoped his order would involve little wait time and allow him to reach Manon’s house before she cooked dinner.

  His stomach growled. He glanced at the people seated at the tables. One figure caused his hands to curl into fists. Of all the people in town, this was the one he didn’t want to encounter. Though a meeting with Tom Sands had been bound to occur, did the encounter have to be tonight?

  Tom put his burger down. He strutted to where Rafe stood. “So you really are back. You’ve a lot of nerve showing yourself in Fern Lake. Imagine you’re after her. Just letting you know she’s not available for scum like you.”

  Rafe stared at the shorter man. “How do you figure that?”

  A sneer curved Tom’s mouth. “She doesn’t love you, not after what you pulled years ago. How long do you plan to stay?”

  “Why is that your business?”

  “We don’t need your kind around. Suppose you’re peddling drugs.”

  Rafe sucked in a breath. “Aren’t you an attorney? Do you not understand what slander means?”

  “Of course I do. Truth isn’t that.” Tom’s face turned scarlet. “I asked you a question.”

  “Here’s my answer. I’m in Fern Lake for the long haul. Even have a job.” Though he kept his voice low, people stared. The line moved forward.

  Tom followed. His gaze moved from Rafe’s head to his boots. “What kind? Construction?”

  The urge to slug Tom moved closer to the surface. Rafe fought for control. Physical action wasn’t the way. “Sorry to disappoint you. I’m the new Director of Nursing at Fern Lake General.”

  Tom’s eyes widened. His hands fisted on his hips. “Stay away from Manon.” His words ended on a shrill note.

  Rafe moved to the counter. “Two blues and a large order of fries. Put them in an insulated bag.”

  Tom sidled closer. “Did you hear what I said?”

  “Yes and so did everyone in here. Do you think she’ll like the scene you’ve created? I think not.”

  “Doesn’t matter. She’s mine.”

  “Not going to happen.” Was Tom crazy? Hadn’t he heard Manon’s refusal? Why didn’t he accept he would never possess her?

  “She’s always been mine. Her father assured me and named me as his choice to protect her when he couldn’t.”

  Did Tom believe in Manon’s father’s goodwill? He was a fool if he did.

  Rafe paid. With his order in hand he strode to the door. “The decision to accept or reject you is Manon’s. I know she tells you no, now and in the past.” He left the shop.

  “You’ll learn I’m right,” Tom shouted.

  Rafe tucked the food in the saddlebag and donned his helmet. No way would he continue this conversation.

  Tom waved a fist. “I’m a patient man. This isn’t finished.”

  Rafe turned. “Will take more than patience when a woman doesn’t like you.” He pulled out of the parking space and rode down Main Street. He followed Gran Ruth’s directions. When he reached the house, he rode up the long driveway and parked. For several moments he sat and organized his thoughts. Finally he removed his helmet.

  Was she at home yet? A glance at the windows showed lights. She was there.

  Sitting and staring at the house was the coward’s way. He dismounted and removed the bag of food. After drawing a deep breath of the sultry air, he strode up the walk to the front door.

  How would she react? He held the bag with the logo to the front so she would see Burger Bounty. Would she bite? He pressed the bell and waited. Just as he was about to ring again, the door opened. His cock surged fully erect. He leaned against the door frame and curled his hand around the edge of the door.

  Chapter 5

  Manon’s mouth gaped. Rafe raised the Burger Bounty bag. Though she tried to speak, no sound emerged. She tried to press her lips into a firm line and failed. Another attempt to speak was unsuccessful. Of all the
times to develop lockjaw. The way he stood with one hand on the door and the smile she remembered sent temptation rushing like water over a ruptured dam.

  Go away.

  She swallowed. That mental shout remained unsaid. Her gaze locked with his. Waves of desire beat against the urge to slam the door. Fire in his blue eyes enticed. Indecision froze her into a statue of ice.

  Speak. Send him away.

  She couldn’t force herself to utter a sound. The staring contest continued. She wanted to snatch the bag and shut the door. Memories of days long ago surfaced like eddies of heated water. Days she’d iced over. Words of love he’d spoken. Words of forever. Words she didn’t want to remember, yet couldn’t forget.

  Hunger, not for the contents of the bag, threatened to wash her over the falls into the hot springs of the past. Her heart thundered. With grim determination she tore her gaze from his face.

  Wrong move.

  Her gaze landed on the bulge beneath his fly. The months since her last relationship with a man rose and brought a desire to be held. Was his need as strong as hers?

  Pulsing began. Her heart rate accelerated. Her breasts felt heavy. She clamped her teeth together. Why did he possess this power to arouse her? He made her want to see his nude body preparing to cover hers. She should send him away but the words wouldn’t form. His scent wafted toward her, curled around adding another layer of desire.

  Shut the door.

  She raised her head. One of his hands curled around the edge of the door. If she acted on that thought she would smash the fingers that had brought delight. A quick glance told her he wouldn’t retreat.

  She cleared her throat. “Why are you here?”

  He waved the bag. “Brought dinner. Since you won’t go to a restaurant with me, I figured we could eat in.”

  Manon swallowed. “Go away.”

  “Not going to happen.” He slid through the opening. “You don’t want me to leave.”

  “How can you know what I want? You haven’t seen me for twelve years. People change.”

  “And still remain the same.”

  His smile rippled along her skin. He was right and wrong. She released a held breath. She could handle a sexual encounter. There had been several in her life and she had walked away unscathed. Sex was all she wanted from him. She stepped back. He kicked the door closed and followed.