Spring Fever

by Barbara Winkes

  “I saw David earlier,” Andy said.

  “Yes, he’s here with his girlfriend,” Rebecca informed her. Whatever led to David’s change of heart, it came in handy now.

  Andy’s face fell, but she wasn’t so easily deterred. “Oh, I know how you feel. I’ll be honest—”

  “Andy.”

  “Eric and I went through all of this, and we made it in the—”

  “Andy, stop it. This is Betty’s party. Surely, you don’t want to make a scene with Charles and Eric’s colleagues around? Leave it alone, unless you plan to apologize to my daughter for scaring the hell out of her. Contributing to the cost of her counselor would also be an option. Maybe then, we can talk.”

  Rebecca was proud of herself for containing the conversation and her own wish to slap the woman in front of her. It would do no good, she knew.

  Callie came to her rescue. “See, Andy,” she said, “I have to thank you. Your protest against the anti-bullying program really inspired the teachers, and you got me a reading gig.”

  Andy blushed to the roots of her hair. “Keep mocking me all you want. If you don’t repent, you’ll have to deal with the consequences. God will punish you.”

  For a moment, Rebecca considered her options. She could certainly argue with the best of them, and she assumed she knew the Bible better than Andy did. She also knew nothing she could say would convince someone like her. Andy had made her choices, and so had Rebecca.

  “Maybe, but the law might punish you. At this point, looking into a restraining order seems like an interesting option. Have fun at the party.”

  When Andy realized she wasn’t getting any help, she spun on her heels and left.

  * * * *

  The conversation wasn’t over yet. Rebecca had a feeling about it, and Andy probably knew it too. This was about the harm Andy had done to Maggie—at least it was for Rebecca—but there were other dynamics in play too.

  Andy and Father Reynolds forced her to take a look at her own interpretation of her faith, and time after time, she came up with the same result. Their ideas couldn’t differ more, and she had no respect or patience for them using religion to serve their own agenda. Maybe they’d been misled, or maybe there was money to be made, but none of that was an excuse in the long run.

  Still, when she walked into the bathroom to find Andy crying, Rebecca couldn’t help the stir of sympathy. Maybe it was pity. That she had any kind of empathic sentiments for the woman frustrated her.

  “I’m not the one who needs to apologize,” Rebecca said calmly as she closed the door. “Harassing my family and others, I hear, has practically been your hobby from the day you moved here. Did you really think that would go over so well?”

  “I hate this town,” Andy sniffed. “Everybody hates me.”

  “Hate is a strong word, and I’m sure that’s not true anyway. It would be a good start, though, if you started to take responsibility. Going after Miss Romano for that program? I’ve known her for many years. She is one of the best teachers in that school, and it’s ridiculous to think she’d put students at a disadvantage.”

  “She’s a queer too,” Andy said bitterly.

  “Don’t start rumors.”

  “Why? Shouldn’t everybody be out and proud, like you?”

  At this point, Rebecca had almost forgotten what she’d come here for in the first place. She opened her purse and closed it again, thinking that nothing was so important it couldn’t wait until she and Callie got home.

  She hoped Andy wouldn’t choose Miss Romano as her next victim.

  “Leave everybody alone,” she said. “This is not your call, and arguing with what you imagine God to be will not help.”

  Andy turned to the sink and washed her face, staring bleakly at her mirror image.

  “I was doing your daughter a favor. Yes, she might be scared now, but that’s nothing in comparison to the pain she’s going to face later, when she learns what’s really going on.”

  “Oh, please. How about your son? You think he’ll be proud of you?” Any sympathetic feelings Rebecca might have left fled rapidly.

  “Are you not judging?” Andy finally faced her—her gaze imploring, bordering on desperate. “You think I’m such a joke, but unlike you, I’ve fought. I’ve battled those sick, sinful impulses, and I saved my marriage. Maybe you envy me for that.”

  Rebecca couldn’t help a surprised laugh at the absurd accusation. “Aren’t you forgetting something here? You keep coming after me!”

  For a moment, the conflicting emotions played over Andy’s face—anger, confusion, and something Rebecca couldn’t quite interpret until Andy stepped forward and kissed her.

  Rebecca stood, dumbfounded, speechless, even when Andy shrank back so quickly that she nearly hit her hip on the counter.

  “See? See what you made me do?” Her voice had gone up to a higher notch, making her sound like on the verge of a breakdown. Rebecca felt oddly responsible. At the same moment, she had to suppress an inappropriate bout of laughter. At least, the picture had gotten a lot clearer in a heartbeat.

  “You tempted me!” Andy was horrified.

  “I did no such thing.” If I had the power to do that…wow.

  “Father Reynolds thought I could be a friend to you, and help you find your way. I told him I wasn’t strong enough yet, and this is what happens. Why did you do this to me?”

  Rebecca struggled to find the right words, feeling like she had stepped into an alternate universe. “What exactly do you think it is I did? Wait, don’t answer that. Don’t worry though. It’s not like I’m going to tell everybody.”

  “You’re like all the rest of them,” Andy seethed. “You’ll see…you…” She turned to flee from the room.

  “Nice talking to you too,” Rebecca said to the slamming door.

  She didn’t think Andy could do her a lot of harm, but nevertheless, Rebecca still felt stunned by the depth of the woman’s delusion. She decided to find Callie and head home. It was probably time to relieve Delia from her kid-sitting duties, and they’d have to get to the airport early tomorrow to pick up Fiona. Lost in thought, she nearly ran into another guest, startled to realize it was David.

  “Hey. We were just about to leave. I saw you brought Susan. I’m glad you’re working things out.” Obviously, now that she’d found her speech, she was back to rambling. Could anyone blame her, given the events of the evening?

  David smiled ruefully. “Me too. I guess you’re all set for the summer trip?”

  “Pretty much, yes.”

  “I know we talked about this, but I’d like to pay some part of it for the girls. It’s a great opportunity for them, especially Dina.”

  “You don’t have to, but if you absolutely want to, I’m not going to stop you.”

  They shared a hesitant smile.

  “Rebecca, before you go—”

  “Do I want to hear this?” Her tone was level, but David understood her worries anyway.

  “I want you to know I’m sorry,” he said. “I was hurt, and the way I dealt with it, I ended up hurting you…and Susan. I know you always tried to do what was best for the kids, and I guess all of this…it’s what you needed to do.”

  “Thank you. I appreciate that.” If tonight was the time for painful truths, then so be it. “I get where you’re coming from, but that one time, you scared me. I know you didn’t mean to.”

  “I went to see Craig,” David said. “Nothing’s changed on that front. He keeps claiming that Maria would still be alive, if it wasn’t for you, and that his marriage would be as solid as ever.”

  “Somehow, that doesn’t surprise me. I didn’t even know she’d be at the church that night. We talked for a few minutes. Then, we went home. I never imagined—”

  “I know. I found that disturbing, but what’s worse is I realized I wasn’t much better, acting like a creep around you.”

  “For what it’s worth, I didn’t believe you’d ever go that far. Have a good night, David, and say he
llo to Susan. I’ll e-mail you the bill.”

  “You do that. Let me know how it goes with Andy.”

  “What?” she asked, startled, as if he had any idea about what happened in the bathroom.

  “About the school program. If she and Eric are stirring up any more trouble, I could call the school too,” David clarified.

  “Oh, that. Sure. Thanks. I think we’ll have more parents on our side. I…have to go.”

  “No problem. Take care.”

  It occurred to Rebecca that while she was perfectly fine not sharing that rather baffling moment, Andy might not feel the same, and the story she’d tell would be as distorted as everything else Rebecca had heard from her.

  Callie’s smile told her she was blessedly unaware for the moment. Rebecca would tell her later, when they were alone. It worried her to think that Father Reynolds had been in on the plan all along, that he was still trying to pull strings in the background.

  He wouldn’t win.

  People in Autumn Leaves were more suspicious of new people in town than anything else, and Callie got her share of that, but she was not the one under all the scrutiny anymore.

  He and Andy were.

  * * * *

  “The good news is that David came to some conclusions, and he’s moving on,” Rebecca said after they’d brought Maggie home and seen her off to bed. Since the temperature was still mild this evening, they’d retreated to the porch for a nightcap. “The bad news is that Andy lost it completely. She cried to me in the bathroom, and then she kissed me.”

  Callie was aware something must have happened when Rebecca returned to the party outside and asked to leave soon after, but she’d sensed it wasn’t anything Rebecca wanted to discuss right then and there. The conclusion startled her, though she had to admit it wasn’t much of a surprise.

  “I can’t believe the nerve she has! I might have been unaware for a long time, but at least I didn’t go around attacking people. What the hell is she thinking?”

  “I guess she hasn’t been thinking clearly in some time.”

  Rebecca gave her a quizzical look, and Callie realized how that must have sounded to her. “Not that I can’t understand wanting to kiss you, even though I prefer to be the only one to do it. She’s just very confused by her feelings, the brainwashing she no doubt got. Everything she accuses you of is probably true for her. She’s jealous of you.”

  “I get that, but this isn’t just about me. Even worse, Father Reynolds put her up to it. I’m thinking it might be a good idea to go to service in Marin County, even if it’s a longer drive.”

  “You’re sure?” It was in that church where Rebecca’s presentation of her work for the church website had turned into a passionate speech. She had even talked about marriage. Of course, at the time, she’d meant it in theory. Callie was aware of that. Still, that place meant a lot to Rebecca. She had roots there, and it didn’t seem fair that Father Reynolds’ scheming should rob her of that.

  “No,” Rebecca admitted, “but going to his will only remind me of what he did and piss me off. He came here when Maggie was missing, and he still had the gall to—wow. I’m sorry. This is not the relaxing glass of wine to end the evening I had in mind.”

  “I’m sure I can help you with that, and I’ll do it better.”

  Rebecca laughed, leaning back in her chair with a sigh. “I have no doubts. I don’t really want to make decisions about him or Andy at the moment. Tomorrow, we won’t go anyway. Let’s make sure your mom has a good stay here. Is there anything she’s not supposed to know?”

  “Between Sean and Asha, I think there’s not much left,” Callie said dryly. “Except…they didn’t know about last Halloween. So, please don’t mention it.” The shiver running down her spine had nothing to do with the temperature. “Not this time at least.”

  Rebecca took her hand on the table, holding it in hers and giving Callie all the answer she needed.

  * * * *

  The last time at the airport was rushed, trying to get home as soon as possible without getting stuck in the snow—too many uncertainties between them after the confrontation with Nicole.

  Today, it seemed like a much friendlier environment as they had a coffee in the waiting area, watching planes arrive and take off into the clear blue sky in the distance. The constant flow of people arriving and hurrying toward their gates was mesmerizing.

  “Look,” Rebecca said to Maggie, who followed her gaze, slack-jawed. “The next time we go, it’ll be a big plane like this.”

  “—and we’ll be on that big plane forever,” Callie muttered, obviously not too thrilled about that part of the trip.

  For all her grumbling, however, she looked relaxed and excited.

  Focusing on the positive. The best thing to do about Andy was really to ignore her and, if possible, not be alone in a room with her. In the light of day, Rebecca could look back on the events of the day before with some amusement. She’d feel more sympathy for the woman if she’d shown any redeeming qualities. Since Andy had chosen to stay in her usual self-pitying, self-righteous way, Rebecca didn’t think she owed her any more chances. Case closed.

  Now to meet the mother of the woman she loved. Rebecca was certain Fiona O’Brien wasn’t anything like David’s mother, Laurie, with whom Rebecca had a complicated relationship over many years. Still, she tried to imagine herself in the other woman’s shoes—seeing her daughter with someone almost a decade older and who had cheated in a previous relationship.

  “Would you stop worrying?” Callie chided gently.

  “I’m going to be forty this year.”

  “Yes, I know. So what?” Leaning closer, Callie whispered, “Hey, when we first met, you thought I was this predatory lesbian preying on the women of the neighborhood. Now, you’re afraid those few years will be such an issue?”

  Rebecca gave her a quizzical look. “I wasn’t that naïve, and predatory never came to my mind.”

  Callie laughed. “My point is Mom is probably aware you didn’t have the girls when you were twelve. You know Asha. She has a high opinion of you, and she talks to Sean all the time. Believe me. There won’t be any big surprises. The storm has passed.”

  “I really like that imagery.” Rebecca cast a look over to Maggie, who leafed through a magazine. “Let’s hope it’s true.” She didn’t need to mention her words weren’t just a reference to Fiona’s visit.

  * * * *

  Rebecca watched the reunion between Callie and her mother with mixed emotions. They didn’t talk all that often—just like Rebecca and her own parents—though she suspected the reasons were completely different ones. She wondered what would make them come all the way from their home in Florida. Mom, Dad. I didn’t move in with a friend. I’m a lesbian.

  Yes, maybe that would do it…or not.

  “Rebecca, it’s so nice to finally meet you.” She accepted the brief hug Fiona gave her, smiling back at her. It was obvious where Callie got her petite form and hair color. Fiona’s might be assisted by dye these days.

  “Likewise,” she said. “I hope you had a good flight.”

  “Oh, yes. It was too short though. I love flying.” That was where the family resemblance ended, Rebecca thought with amusement.

  “…and you must be Maggie,” Fiona continued. “Callie told me you’ve been writing your own stories. That’s great.”

  Maggie beamed and blushed under the praise. “I want to write books, like Callie.”

  “Then, it’s good to start early. Would you, by any chance, show me anything you’ve written?”

  The two of them walked ahead, chatting amiably. Rebecca cast a bewildered look after her daughter, engaged in a conversation with a woman she’d met a few moments ago. On one hand, it was heartbreaking to think she might have talked to Andy this unassumingly. Maggie usually didn’t trust so easily. Your uncle or the mother of a classmate should be safe, but sometimes, they weren’t. It was good to see Maggie recover and find that there were still adults she could open
up to.

  “I guess that worked well,” Callie said to her, putting her arm around her waist. “Let’s go home.”

  She went with Maggie in the backseat while Fiona took the front passenger seat to stretch her legs a little after the flight. Rebecca couldn’t help comparing the situation to a similar one almost twenty years ago—her introduction to the Lowman family.

  She’d made do, because she’d found a good friend in her sister-in-law Maria, and because she had mapped out what she’d wanted in life…and she’d wanted it with David Lowman. A friend, a companion, and eventually, a family. She’d thought a relationship that felt warm and safe would be enough to call it love. It felt reasonably right, especially after they had the children, their individual responsibilities, and their respective place in the structure of their community.

  It was ironic to realize that, for most of the time, she had tried to be and to give enough—a goal never quite accomplished, if you asked David’s mother—but it turned out this life hadn’t been enough for her. Warm and safe didn’t suffice anymore—once you knew the difference between companionship and the complete joy that another person’s presence could give.

  Fiona might not even want to tackle any difficult questions, but if she did, Rebecca felt confident she had simple and effective answers. You couldn’t argue with love.

  * * * *

  Callie was aware Rebecca had the idea she’d have to undergo and pass some kind of test. It was easier for Callie, knowing Fiona’s affection didn’t come with any conditions. Still, they were talking about adult situations, and she wasn’t sure what exactly Asha had shared with Sean that eventually got to their mother.

  She wanted Fiona to see their shared home, a glimpse of their daily life. She’d had her own struggles, some of which she would not share with her mother, but Callie wanted her to know she was aware of the sacrifice Rebecca had made in order to be with her.

  They sat down for a small snack after giving Fiona a quick tour of the house, since they’d planned a restaurant visit later.

  “It’s bright in here. I think you’re happier than Valerie was in all her time in Autumn Leaves.”

  Fiona made herself tear up, and Callie realized she wasn’t far from it.