Girl on a Diamond Pedestal
Page 16
She was starting to wonder if she should have taken the extra time, taken everything he could give. Some days it seemed like her pain couldn’t get any worse anyway, so maybe it would have been better to take a bed that had Ethan in it, rather than her big, cold bed back at the manor.
Back at her decrepit old house. But at least it was hers. Ethan had sent those papers already, paid in full. And as far as the public was concerned, they were married. No one was paying close enough attention to realize they hadn’t crossed paths in two weeks.
That was another thing she’d done. Gotten her house on the market. Soon she’d be able to move into the city, or just outside of it. Somewhere smaller. More practical.
Someplace where being alone didn’t echo so much.
“Sir, I’m afraid you’ll have to get in line.”
David’s distressed tone was answered by a harsh curse spoken in a very familiar Australian accent. She looked up and nearly melted onto the spongy rubber floor.
“Ethan?”
“You work here?” he asked.
He didn’t look good. Well, that was a lie—he looked delicious. But he looked tired. Like he hadn’t slept for two weeks. Like his whole body hurt him. He looked like she felt.
“Yes, I do. If I didn’t they wouldn’t let me behind the counter. Employees only.”
“Right. Yeah …?.right.”
“Did you have something to say?”
“I’ve had a lot of things to say, for a long time. But you walked out on me. You left me on my knees.”
People, David included, were staring now.
“May I take a break?” she asked, her eyes not leaving Ethan’s.
“Please,” David said.
She took her apron off and pulled the band from her hair, releasing it around her shoulders, before stepping out from behind the counter. “What?”
“Outside,” Ethan said.
“All right. But I don’t have long. Jacques just called and if I’m on a break anyway, I should return that.”
“Oh. Jacques.”
“About the audition.”
“Of course.” He opened the coffee shop door and held it for her. “How did that go?” he asked when they were out on the sidewalk.
“It was … he said I was a bit too dark. He wanted to hear something brighter from me. But I told him a different day.”
“Why?”
“Because I didn’t feel bright.”
“Any idea why that was?” he asked, his voice rough.
“You know damn well why, Ethan Grey. What are you doing here? Do you need your trophy for something else? Is that it? Did you not twist the knife hard enough into your father?”
He shook his head. “No. I don’t need a trophy. I don’t want one either. I want you. You were never a thing to me and I … I behaved abominably. And you’re right, it was the worst thing I could have done.”
“Then why?”
“It was just what you said. You were right. I was looking for Grey’s to give me some kind of validity. To bring me some sense of satisfaction and purpose that I didn’t seem to have without it.” He took a sharp breath. “I told my grandfather I don’t want the resorts.”
“But your father …”
“Can have them. Revenge is empty, Noelle. Vain. It was for myself. All that time I thought that it was for my mother, but it never was. It was for me. I was so desperate to keep blaming my father, to find a way to make it all about him so that I wouldn’t acknowledge … I wasn’t enough for her. Or for him.”
“Ethan …”
“I wasn’t as important as her job. I wasn’t as important as her marriage. There were a few times when she told me … she wished she had never had a child. It was my fault my father didn’t love her. And that day … If I hadn’t blamed him …”
“You don’t deserve any blame in that, Ethan. You were a child.”
“A child whose parents barely looked at him. I … There’s something broken in me, Noelle. I know that. But … I still want you. Even though I messed everything up, even though you should say no, and find a man who isn’t damaged like this, I want you.”
“Then why …” she choked up, her words stalling in her aching throat. “Why didn’t you say this before I left?”
“Because I didn’t think … I thought if you still didn’t want me, even though I was getting more money, more power, then there was nothing I could ever say that would change it.”
“You jackass. You thought I would want you if you had more money?” The stunned look on his face would almost have been funny if her chest didn’t feel like a hole had been punched in it.
“It was never about you, Noelle. It was about me. Why wasn’t I enough? My mother was so miserable raising me she tried to kill herself. My father has never seen any value in me. Why should you be different? Not because you aren’t amazing, but because I just can’t seem to earn the love of people in my life. And I’ve always dealt with it. I’ve never begged for it. Until you. I’m begging you. And I’ll get on my knees again if I have to. I want you to love me.”
The image of him, so proud, so strong, ready to crumble at her feet, undid her completely. Two warm tears slid down her cheeks and splashed onto his arm.
“I do love you, Ethan. I have … loved you … for such a long time. But I didn’t think you wanted love.”
“I didn’t. That’s a huge part of why I acted the way I did that night in the casino. I was trying to force myself to get back to business. But I couldn’t. And in the end I … I don’t want to. Love hurts, and I’ve really gotten a dose of that in the past two weeks. But I’ve decided it’s worth it. Because even though I’ve never been in so much pain before, I’ve also never felt so alive as I do because of you. Just because I love you.”
“That can’t be right.” She shook her head.
“You don’t think so?”
“No. Because that’s how you make me feel. Like I can do anything. You’ve never tried to hold me back, or tell me I can’t. You made me want to try at life again. And I was … scared, so I ran from you, from what you made me feel. But I don’t want to run. I want to stay here with you.”
“Here?” He looked around them, at the bustling sidewalk.
“Not right here, but you know what I mean.”
He dipped his head and kissed her. Warmth flooded her and she felt her heart beat again.
“I want to ask you to marry me,” he said.
“Then do it!”
“But I don’t want to interfere with your career. With touring.”
“Playing again … I want to play again. But it’s not who I am. I get that now. I’m so much more than just the piano. Than what the public thinks about me. I’m me. And you helped me figure out what that means. I want to be with you, and if music fits into that, then I’d love to play. But it’s not everything to me. It doesn’t define me. And that … there’s so much freedom in that.”
“Then Noelle, will you marry me?”
“I’m married to you already,” she said.
“I know, but we’ll do it somewhere else, not in Vegas this time.”
“I liked our wedding.”
“In that case, will you stay married to me? Forever?”
“Yes.”
“Thank you, Noelle, for loving me. Just me.”
She leaned in and kissed him, her tongue teasing the edge of his lips. “It’s not a hard thing to do, Ethan. You’re exactly what I need. More than enough for anyone, and perfect for me. Even if I could have all the fame back, all of it and then some, the adoration of millions would never mean as much as having your love.”
EPILOGUE
HE loved it when she wore red at the piano. He was certain she did it to tease him. And it always worked. Two years of marriage hadn’t seen any of the spark dim in their marriage. If anything, it burned brighter now than ever before.
Ethan watched from the first row of the concert hall as Noelle started to play the grand piano, her fingers tripping lightly
over the keys, her slender shoulders working with the rhythm.
The house was packed tonight, filled with people who had come to listen to her music.
Pride surged through him. She’d been playing in theaters along the east coast regularly for a while now, thanks to her resurgence of fame after playing in Jacques’ orchestra. And now Noelle played her own music, on her own terms. Not in world-famous music halls as she’d done once, but she never seemed sorry about that. Not even for a moment.
Ethan picked up the program that she’d handed him before the start of the show and opened it. There was a handwritten note inside, done in Noelle’s neat style.
Tonight, I’m playing a special song. The one I started in Australia all those years ago. I know how it ends now. Do you? Happily.
Ethan’s throat tightened and he looked up at the stage, at the woman he loved. She looked back at him, her eyes shining in the spotlight as she played.
Later he would have to remind her of all the other things he’d taught her. After the show. And after he’d thanked her for all she had shown him.
And for bringing love into his life. Because there was no amount of fame or money that could rival the love they shared. Those things were easily lost, and they both knew it.
But their love was forever.
* * * * *
All the characters in this book have no existence outside the imagination of the author, and have no relation whatsoever to anyone bearing the same name or names. They are not even distantly inspired by any individual known or unknown to the author, and all the incidents are pure invention.
All Rights Reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. This edition is published by arrangement with Harlequin Enterprises II BV/S.à.r.l. The text of this publication or any part thereof may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, storage in an information retrieval system, or otherwise, without the written permission of the publisher.
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® and TM are trademarks owned and used by the trademark owner and/or its licensee. Trademarks marked with ® are registered with the United Kingdom Patent Office and/or the Office for Harmonisation in the Internal Market and in other countries.
First published in Great Britain 2012
by Mills & Boon, an imprint of Harlequin (UK) Limited.
Harlequin (UK) Limited, Eton House, 18-24 Paradise Road,
Richmond, Surrey TW9 1SR
© Maisey Yates 2012
ISBN: 978-1-408-97384-4
Table of Contents
Cover
Excerpt
About the Author
Title Page
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Epilogue
Copyright