Savage Love

by Riley Storm

  “Listen, Lucien. You need to get him to talk,” Chief said. “He’s got what you want. Your solution.”

  “I still don’t follow. You’re doing this thing where you tell me how helpful he is, without telling why. Stop letting the adrenaline influence your brain.”

  Chief glared. “This is the shifter they sent to replace you at the hospital, you dumbass. Don’t you get what that means?!” He grabbed at his ribs again after the outburst, cursing softly.

  “Yes,” he said quietly, his eyes drifting back down to the floor and Lede’s body. “Yes I do.”

  The answer to his prayers was now laying on the floor in front of him.

  Or would be, if his entire team weren’t banged up. Lucien could feel half a dozen places on his own body that were in a rough way, though he was doing his best to be the stoic leader to all of them just now, just in case the attackers came back for their own leader. He couldn’t imagine they would sit by for long.

  Nor will they even if they don’t come back.

  “We don’t have much time,” he said to the others. “We have to act soon. Lede can give us the access, hopefully help us bypass most of the security, but we need to act fast. Before they get in, get set up and waiting for us—and disable his codes.”

  Lana looked at him. “We’re not in any kind of condition to fight,” she said. “Like, at all. We need some time to recover.”

  Lorik didn’t say anything, but the grimace of pain on his face, not to mention the mess that was his right side where he’d gone sailing through the wall, told Lucien all he needed to know.

  Then there was Chief, who could barely even talk excitedly without a lot of pain.

  “You’re right,” he said, thinking it through. “We also can’t stay here. They’re going to be coming back for him.” He pointed at Lede. “Coming back here. In fact, that’s probably going to be their first priority. Lyken will organize the attack himself. We need to leave here right now. Get your stuff.”

  In his head, he was thinking that if they timed it just right, they would have a chance. Hurt, banged up and unprepared as they were, it might just all come down to timing. It would take time for the routed shifters to get back to the hospital facility, where Lucien knew Lyken had set up base. Once there, they would have to get organized, and come after him.

  I really hope I’m right about this. Because if I’m wrong, we’re going to be royally screwed.

  The timing would have to be just right…

  33

  We don’t need you anymore.

  Those were the words Lucien had said to her as they packed up their meager belongings from the tiny safehouse and piled into the van. Four shifters, one human and one Bergey. The cargo van was designed to seat two, however, and though the others had offered the seat up, she’d politely declined, wanting to sit with her dog, knowing he’d be nervous in the back.

  Which was why Chief now rode up front, nursing his cracked ribs. Lana and Lorik sat across from her, Lorik already asleep on Lana’s shoulder as she worked to keep him upright while they drove, despite her own exhaustion.

  We don’t need you anymore.

  She knew that Lucien meant for the raid. That he was excited to have a way to help his friends that didn’t involve him asking her to put herself in danger. Ask was all he would have done. If she’d said no, Alison had every bit of confidence that Lucien would have stormed the facility anyway. That was just the sort of person he was. His friends were in trouble, and he had sat idly by for too long. It was that trait that made him, in her eyes, a good leader, despite whatever he said to the contrary.

  The truth was, though, that despite the terror that flowed up from deep within at the idea of helping them storm this secret facility, Alison now felt she was being left out. The shifters had welcomed her among them, and though she’d not realized it at the time, she’d let herself open to them. Some part of her, it seemed, had accepted that she was going to help them gain access, separate from whether she decided to pursue things with Lucien or not.

  They were her pack. Her friends. The only friends she’d really ever had, even though she’d known them but a few days. It was just one of those things. She belonged there, among them. It was felt on a level so instinctual she couldn’t define it.

  To Alison, it was akin to suddenly being blessed with a bunch of brothers—and one sister—that she’d never realized she had.

  Now they were just ready to throw her by the side?

  Logically, she knew that wasn’t what they were doing. They were trying to protect her, to ensure she didn’t have to take part in the raid. After all, she was human, and they weren’t. They could do all sorts of things she couldn’t. Alison had seen evidence of that firsthand during the fight at the house, among other things.

  Reaching out, she steadied herself against the floor with one hand as they turned, using the other to hold on to Bergey, ensuring he didn’t slide across the floor.

  We don’t need you anymore.

  It resonated deep within her, on a level she knew Lucien didn’t get, because he didn’t know about it, wasn’t aware of everything she’d gone through. It wasn’t his fault, but it hurt just the same. They had Lede, now they could do it without her.

  What about what I want?

  The truck bounced as they took another turn, this time off the road, she assumed, judging by the way the truck shifted. They had to be close to their destination; it wasn’t all that long a drive away, no more than ten minutes to the warehouse on the outskirts of town, and they’d been driving for at least that already.

  Lucien must have taken a longer way, to ensure they weren’t followed, or something like that.

  Moments later, the truck came to a halt. She heard the front doors open and close as the engine rattled off into silence, and a few seconds later someone undid the latch and lifted the rear gate. It slid up noisily into the ceiling, revealing them to already be in the warehouse. Lucien had simply driven the truck right inside.

  She let Lana and Lorik exit first, then walked to the edge. Bergey, excited to be off the truck, ran to the edge and jumped off, excitedly going to explore the new playground. She heard his claws skittering off the concrete as he happily romped about the massive structure.

  “You okay?” Lucien asked, giving her a hand down.

  Alison only nodded, lost in her own little world as she climbed down from the truck.

  “I’m glad you can be safe now,” Lucien said awkwardly. “And that I don’t have to ask you for help.” He paused, but when she didn’t say anything, he kept going. “None of this went down how I wanted or imagined. I just want you to know that. It was never my intention to get you involved. I should have waited until this was all over before seeing you again.”

  “You’d be dead by now if you hadn’t come to my house,” she countered. “No matter what else, I’m glad you did, because I don’t want that.”

  “Wanted the honor to yourself?” he teased.

  She didn’t smile.

  “Sorry, bad timing,” he said, clearly unhappy with himself, if the flash of anger in his eyes and further compressing of his lips were anything to go by.

  “Lucien, I want to help.”

  There, she’d said it.

  He frowned, big bushy eyebrows wrinkling above his pale blue eyes. “What do you mean? We have Lede now. You can stay safe. Out of harm’s way. We don’t need you anymore.”

  Alison steeled herself against that terrible phrase, but despite her best efforts, Lucien must have finally noticed how it affected her.

  “Alison?” he asked softly, his head lowering closer to her level in concern. “What is it? Why does that bother you so much?”

  “Because,” she said, looking away, not wanting him to see her cry.

  Strong fingers closed around her jaw, slowly turning her head back so that he could look at her. Alison gave token resistance, but caved in the end.

  “Why?” he asked, one big thumb reaching up to caress her cheek and wipe
away the trail of wetness that fell from her eye.

  “Because I’ve never been a part of anything in my life,” she explained, the words tumbling forth suddenly, surprising even her. “Never. Not until you and the others showed up and welcomed me into your little gang. Your pack. Whatever you call it. I know I’m not one of you, but I felt like I belonged, and dammit, do you have any idea how many years I’ve waited to feel like I belong?” she sobbed through tears. “How many nights I stayed up late, dreaming of a life where I fit in, where I felt like I was needed.”

  Lucien sighed. “And now I just told you we don’t need you anymore.”

  She nodded, using the back of her palm to wipe the tears away. “When I was a child, not an infant, but old enough to remember, my parents gave me away. They didn’t want me anymore. Didn’t need me. I remember the day they dropped me off at the orphanage, Lucien. I remember that. Do you have any idea how deep that hurt goes?” she asked in a whisper.

  “I can’t imagine,” he rumbled, a mixture of sadness and anger.

  “Well let me tell you, it runs deep. I’ve never trusted anyone much farther than I could throw them and well…” she gestured at herself. “I’m not much for throwing people, as you can see. Not my strong suit.”

  He cracked a fleeting smile at that before growing somber again with her.

  “Is that why you’ve been so hesitant with me?” Lucien asked quietly. “Why my leaving hurt you so bad? You thought I abandoned you?”

  Shrugging, she looked up at him. “Everyone else in my life has. My real parents. Unknown numbers of foster parents. Coworkers. Supposed school friends. In the end, they all abandoned me because I was broken. Why would you be any different? Why would you want me?”

  Lucien was already sweeping her up into a hug before she’d finished. “I’m so sorry,” he said, repeating it over and over. “I didn’t know. I feel terrible. I…I never meant for you to think I abandoned you when I left. Nor did I mean to have you think you weren’t wanted just now. I just…I wanted to ensure you were safe.”

  She smiled through the tears. “Sometimes, to be a part of something, you have to throw safety to the wind and just let yourself be a part of something bigger, Lucien. I’ve wanted that chance my entire life, but every time it’s come up, I’ve backed away. Until you. Until all of you. I may only be human, yes. I’m not asking to go throw down next to you, but I want to help, Lucien. I want to contribute.”

  He stiffened. “Alison, listen. I want you to know first of all, that I will never leave you again. Do you understand that? I will—”

  “Don’t you get it?” she said, interrupting him. “That’s what you’re doing now. You’re all going off on this super dangerous mission, and you’re leaving me behind.”

  “But—”

  “No buts,” she said, interrupting him a second time. “I told you, I’m only human, but I can do something to help. Anything.”

  “There’s literally no reason for it!” he said, his voice rising in frustration. “We have someone with all the codes. Everything we need. He can actually get us even deeper into the facility. You can stay safe, uninvolved. So that once it’s over, you can go back to your life safely. Without fear of reprisal. What more can you want?”

  Alison snorted explosively, the sound loud and echoing in the warehouse confines. She no longer cared if the others heard. “Do you really think that these men are that blind to my participation? That they haven’t seen who helped you at the waste transfer station? Or what about the men who already broke into my house and threatened me? Will they just ignore all that? What about how furiously you fought to save me earlier today? Think they missed that too?”

  Lucien was quiet. She knew she was winning the argument.

  “They will come back for me, Lucien. Unless you win, they will come back for me. I know that. I understand that. It means though, that I’m safer with you, than I am staying here. What if they find this place too? They found the last one, no reason they don’t know about here. Yet you would still have me just wait here, alone, without any way to escape if they come here while you’re far away? Come on. Think Lucien. Use logic, not your fear for me, to guide your thoughts!”

  She had him, she knew that, but Alison wasn’t done. “I might not be strong enough here,” she said, pointing to her bicep. “But I am here.” Alison tapped her heart. “And here.” A finger double-tapped the side of her skull. “It’s enough.”

  Lucien was quiet, his eyes searching hers as he worked to find the words she knew he had to say. It wouldn’t be easy for him to accept it, but they both knew he had to. There was no rational reason for him not to.

  “No,” he said firmly, crossing his arms.

  Alison wanted to tear her hair out. “Why the hell not?!” she screamed in frustration.

  34

  “Because I love you!” he shouted, the words ripping free from his throat unexpectedly.

  He hadn’t meant to say them, not here, not now, with the tension between them so high, and nerves frazzled, blood flowing. They were better suited to be said after the raid, when they could calm down and think clearly.

  Too late for that now.

  “What?” Alison gasped, staring up at him.

  “I love you, okay?” He clenched a hand into a fist in frustration, but there was no turning back now. “You are my mate. I want you and only you, Alison. Don’t you get that? There is nobody else.” He inhaled sharply, trying to stay calm, but it wasn’t working. “It would destroy me if something were to happen to you, even more because there’s no need for you to put yourself in harm’s way any longer.”

  “But Lucien.”

  “No buts!” he shouted, using her own words against her. “Don’t you get that it’s not because I don’t have faith in your abilities. I’m doing it because my primary concern in life right now is you, and I can’t have that distracting me while I’m trying to save my brothers!”

  Alison took a step back at his outburst, clearly taken aback by everything he was saying. That was no surprise. Lucien was shocked by everything he was saying. Why wouldn’t she be?

  “You…love me?” she asked, her mouth forming the word slowly, like she was unused to saying it.

  “Yes! I do. I. Love. You.” He snarled at no one in particular. “I didn’t mean to tell you right now, it just sort of slipped out, okay? But of course I do. What else did you think this was all about?”

  “I…”

  His eyes burned brightly as he stared down at her. “If you make a comment about thinking that I doubted your abilities, then I’m going to be very hurt. Because I think I’ve shown time and again that I respect them. More so after the excellent job you did driving the garbage truck.”

  “Well, I don’t know what to say then,” she said, throwing up her hands.

  “Then you’re wrong,” he told her quietly, looking past her.

  In his mind, he was seeing everything that had come and gone between them, and everything he hoped would come to pass. The blossoming of their relationship into something deeper. Marriage. Children. All of that, and many more experiences that he wanted to have with Alison, and no one else.

  “I don’t want you along because I don’t want to expose the only woman I can see myself with to danger,” he said quietly. “I have every belief that you could do it. That you could pull off whatever we may need of you. I didn’t want to ask you to come before, but I had no choice. Now though, now I have that choice.”

  Alison set her face, and Lucien suddenly felt very unsure about all his arguments.

  “What about my choice?” she asked him in just as soft a voice. “You’re taking that away from me by saying I’m not coming.”

  There it was. The gut punch he’d been expecting but wasn’t sure where it would come from. She was right, of course, he was removing her from having a choice, a say in the matter. But it was for her own good.

  “Why do you want to willingly put yourself in harm’s way?” he asked, confused.


  “You’re so smart, Lucien,” she said, putting a hand on his chest, making him tremble. “But you’re also really stupid, you know that? You ask me why I can’t see, but in reality I think you’re the one blinded here.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Because,” she explained gently. “This is the right thing to do. Yet somehow, you can’t see that. All of you have put your lives on the line for me several times now. It’s about time I repaid the favor. All manner of things could go wrong with Lede. What if he refuses to give you the code? Gives you the wrong code? So many things.”

  Lucien chewed on his lower lip, thinking it over, looking at Alison, thinking about it some more, staring at her face some more. It was then he noticed the set of her jaw.

  “You’ve already made this decision, haven’t you?” he asked in defeat.

  She smiled. “You’re learning already,” she said, stepping forward and getting up on to her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. “I’m proud of you.”

  Lucien grumbled incoherently. “Not cool,” he added. “What are they going to think now that they just watched you beat me down.”

  She giggled and patted his chest. “They’ll think you’re a very smart man.”

  “Right. Okay, listen. If you’re coming along, we’re compromising. You stay in the truck as backup. No exceptions, no excuses. I’m not backing down on this one. You’re there if we need you, but only if.”

  Alison looked up at him, and he met her gaze with steel of his own. Even Lucien had limits, and this was one of them.

  “Okay, I can handle that,” she said at last. “Now, you need to get some rest and heal up. Come on,” she said, leading him over to where one of the tents had been set up.

  Lucien followed along dutifully. They were leaving in one hour, enough time for the attackers to get back to the hospital, inform Lyken, and for Lyken to take the only obvious option open to him.