Pride and Joy

by M. L. Rice

  Leah laughed. “It may be fast for you, but I’ve been wanting to kiss you since junior high. Never in a million years did I think it would actually happen.”

  Bryce’s eyes widened and she shook her head in disbelief. “I can’t believe I never knew that.”

  Leah raised her eyebrows. “Like I would have ever said anything!”

  Bryce took her hand, “Hey, I kind of wish you had. We’d have had more time.”

  “I don’t want to think about time.”

  “How about we just agree to enjoy what we have right now? Whatever happens, happens. Deal?”

  “Deal.”

  Leah crawled forward and straddled Bryce’s legs. Bryce brushed Leah’s brunette curls from her face and pulled her forward, running her hands down her back and kissing her gently.

  *

  The next morning Bryce woke up to the sound of her phone ringing. It was Jennifer.

  “Hello?” Bryce mumbled.

  “There you are.”

  “Yeah, here I am. What’s going on?”

  “Nothing. Arati and I just assumed you were going to the lock-in with us last night. We didn’t see you there and when we called you didn’t answer.”

  Bryce remembered turning her cell phone off as soon as Leah had agreed to sleep over. Then Bryce remembered that Leah had slept over! She turned her head to see Leah asleep on top of the covers, a Coast Guard blanket draped over her. Curls lay gently across her cheek and her mouth was slightly parted as soft snores escaped her lips. Bryce smiled.

  In a whisper she said, “Oh. Yeah. I didn’t feel like going. Being with that many people isn’t my thing right now.”

  “Hmm. Makes sense. I just wish you would’ve told us. We were worried about you. Angela couldn’t find Leah either.” Jennifer paused. “Wait. Oh my God. Bryce!”

  Bryce tried to ignore the warmth in her cheeks. “What?”

  “Is Leah with you?”

  Bryce shrugged even though Jennifer couldn’t see it. “Yeah. So?”

  “Oh my God. Did you guys…No, sorry. None of my business. I’m not Arati.”

  “No! No, we just hung out. I’m not ready for…that…yet. I mean damn, I just figured out that I like chicks. Give a girl time, yo!”

  Jennifer laughed. Bryce could tell she was pleased that she had finally found someone she was really interested in and was comfortable talking with her about it.

  “Okay. But you have to let us know everything. Arati is going to have a damn conniption fit when she finds out! She’ll be so happy for you too!”

  “Well, what are you guys doing today? Why don’t we all go have lunch in the park? I’ll bring my football.”

  “Bryce, as per usual, you’re the only one who wants to throw that stupid football around. But lunch sounds great. Twelve o’clock?”

  “Sounds good. Can you bring the sandwiches?”

  “Yep. Okay, see you soon. I’ll call Arati.”

  Bryce hung up the phone and gently patted Leah’s shoulder. “Hey. Leah. Time to wake up. It’s almost noon already!”

  Leah shifted and slowly blinked her eyes open. “Oh. Hey.” She smiled sleepily. “Thanks for letting me crash here. I was too tired to drive home.”

  “Making out until three a.m. will do that, I guess.”

  Leah’s smile widened even more. “Yeah, I guess it will. I’m sure as hell not complaining, though.”

  “Me either. But come on, let’s get ready. We’re going to meet Jenn and Arati in the park for lunch. If you want to, I mean.”

  “Absolutely. I like them. They’ve always been really nice to me.”

  *

  Leah and Bryce entered the kitchen and found a pair of blue eyes staring at them suspiciously.

  “Morning, Mom.”

  “Don’t you mean ‘afternoon’?”

  Bryce looked at her watch.

  “Nope. Have ten more minutes until afternoon.”

  Her mother turned her attention to Leah, who stood slightly behind Bryce. “How are you today, Leah?” Despite the greeting, her eyes remained steely.

  “I’m well, ma’am. Thank you for letting me stay over last night. My parents say thank you too. They don’t like me to be on the roads too late.”

  Her mother nodded curtly. Bryce felt a chill in the air that had nothing to do with the air-conditioning vent directly above her. Why was her mom acting so strangely? She was normally extremely welcoming to all of her friends, and right now she was on the verge of being downright rude. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Leah shrink to hide behind her even more.

  “Are you okay, Mom?” Bryce asked tentatively.

  “Yes. Of course I am. But I do need to talk to you about something. Leah, may I borrow my daughter for a few minutes?”

  Leah stuttered, “Y-yes, of course.”

  Bryce swallowed and followed her mother to her father’s office. The door was closed firmly behind them.

  “What’s up? You’re acting all weird.”

  “Your father and I are still worried about you. You haven’t been yourself lately. We’re wondering if…” She paused, trying to find the right words. “We’re wondering if that Leah girl has something to do with it. We think she might be a bad influence on you.”

  Bryce’s jaw dropped. “Uh, no, Mom. Leah is amazing and one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. And why would you single her out? Arati does way more crazy things than Leah or any of my other friends combined, and you love her.”

  “Yes, but Arati hasn’t been joined at the hip with you…alone…in your room…since you met her.”

  “Look, Mom. Leah is not a bad influence. It’s just that I’m about to leave for the academy and I don’t have a whole lot of time to spend with a new friend, you know? I’m trying to make it count.” What Bryce said was true, of course, but she knew her mother would see past the innocent face she was desperately trying to show. She could already feel the heat starting to scorch her ears, a sure sign that she was either lying or leaving out important information.

  It’s a damn good thing I don’t play poker, Bryce thought wryly as she held her breath, wondering what her mother would say next.

  “Bryce…just…be careful. The devil has many disguises, and some of them seem like good things on the surface. He waits for you to get comfortable with his lies and then he has you. Just like that.” She snapped her fingers.

  “Are you seriously saying Leah is the devil? Really?” Her face fell in disbelief. “That is so incredibly insulting and backward.”

  Her mother shook her head. “No, I’m not saying that. Leah seems like a good person, but even good people can be led down the wrong path and can take others with them. I mean, look at it from my perspective. She shows up out of the blue and now you’re with her all the time. You’re acting strangely, you’re secretive, you’ve left poor Dani to help out at the SCSW charity events alone. Her mother says she’s been really depressed for the past month. I think she misses you. It just seems like this Leah girl is…leading you astray. It might be best if you don’t see her anymore.”

  Bryce’s brow furrowed in anger. “Mom, I’m going to go now before you…throw holy water on my friend or something. Leah and I are meeting Arati and Jenn at the park for lunch. And don’t worry, if she sprouts horns and a tail, you’ll be the first to know.” She spat out the words.

  “Bryce Lee Montgomery! Don’t you take that tone with me!”

  Bryce opened the door and slammed it as she headed back to the kitchen. She saw Leah sitting in one of the kitchen chairs and grabbed her arm as she made a beeline to the back door. “Come on. We don’t want to be late. And we sure as hell don’t want to be here anymore.”

  Leah followed along silently in Bryce’s turbulent wake.

  *

  Arati was already at their usual picnic table in the park when Bryce and Leah arrived. Jennifer joined them with the sandwiches only a few minutes later.

  “Here you go. Turkey for Bryce, egg salad for Arati, PBJ for me, and Leah, I
didn’t know what you wanted so I made you two. Egg salad or turkey?”

  Leah smiled shyly. “You didn’t have to do that, but I’ll take the egg salad.”

  “So are y’all girlfriends now or what?” Arati burst out.

  Bryce almost choked on the bite of turkey sandwich she had just taken. Leah patted her on the back as she coughed and spluttered. She was grateful when Leah answered, “We’re not really thinking about things like that right now. Things are too up in the air, you know?” Leah looked at Bryce for approval.

  Bryce nodded. “Yeah, we’re just enjoying each other while we have the time. We don’t know what will happen next.”

  Arati smiled widely and spoke to Leah. “Well I’m just happy you got our rigid little Bryce out of the closet.”

  “Hey!” Bryce objected.

  “Oh, come on, Bryce. Jennifer and I have been waiting for you to figure it out for years, but you’re just so damn determined that you haven’t been able to see past your own ambition.”

  Bryce, wide-eyed, stared at her.

  “It’s true,” Jennifer said plainly. “Aw, look guys, she’s blushing!”

  “Am not.” Bryce pouted. Her friends laughed happily.

  Chapter Nine

  The next day Bryce started the summer schedule at the pool, working Monday through Friday. Taking time off for graduation had been fun, but she was glad to finally get back in the water. Well, next to the water, watching little kids try, with admirable persistence, to avoid the splashes and dunks of their friends. She’d only had to rescue someone once since starting the job, but she couldn’t count the amount of times she had blown her whistle or yelled for kids to stop being morons in one fashion or another. Still, she enjoyed it and was happy in the knowledge that she was there to protect people.

  The class she had taught on the weekends had ended that morning, and she was fairly confident that none of the children—or Daniela—would harm themselves in the water.

  Daniela.

  Before this last morning session she hadn’t spoken with her since their class two weekends ago, but every time she saw or thought about her she remembered Arati and Jennifer’s revelation that Daniela might also have a crush on her. That was stupid, though. Daniela obviously had a crush on Michael. It had been so obvious at the swim meet. For some reason the thought of Daniela liking someone else caused her to prickle with jealousy.

  Bryce shook her head to clear it. It seemed like she just couldn’t stop thinking about girls. She must really be desperate to explore her new feelings. She thought about it logically. She really had been so focused on school and swimming (and she had never found many guys attractive—go figure) that she hadn’t allowed herself the same leeway of other teenagers in the love department. Now her hormones seemed desperate to play catch-up. That, and she now knew with certainty that she was indeed gay. She wasn’t one to second-guess herself for long, and the events and feelings of the last few weeks left no doubt in her mind. That fact alone didn’t bother her at all, but the timing couldn’t have been worse.

  What am I supposed to do now that I’m leaving for school in a month? I can’t start a serious relationship. It’s not fair to Leah, and it’s sure as hell not fair to me. I won’t have time to sneeze with the workload I’m about to have.

  Maybe she’ll wait for me…

  As soon as the thought entered her head, she knew it was absurd.

  Right. Because people never find love or explore their sexuality in college. God, this sucks.

  She supposed she’d just enjoy it while she could, making it absolutely clear there were no strings attached. And, oh, there were so many things left to enjoy.

  With her thoughts wandering in an entirely inappropriate direction considering her location and duties, she saw a teenage boy slip and fall as he was running, yanking her out of her tantalizing daydream. She’d already warned him twice. She sighed as she descended her ladder, first aid kit in hand. Back to reality. Her inner musings about Leah would have to wait.

  *

  Leah elbowed Bryce as they walked slowly through the park that evening. “What’s got you so quiet tonight?”

  “Sorry. Just thinking.”

  “About what?”

  “About myself. About us.”

  Leah was silent.

  “I love spending time with you and…and the other stuff,” Bryce’s face flushed, but she doubted Leah could see it since the sun had almost completely set over the horizon. “But I just don’t know how we can make it work once we go off to college.”

  Leah stopped and kicked at the dead grass before finally replying, “I’ve been thinking about that too. I don’t want you to feel like you have any obligations to me once we’re separated. I respect you too much to tie you to me…to this town…when you’ll be off in the world adventuring.”

  “Hey, you’ll be having a blast at SSU too, you know.” Bryce turned to Leah and smiled.

  “You bet your hot ass I will!”

  Bryce laughed and presented her backside for Leah to smack, which she did with glee.

  “We’re still good with ‘whatever happens, happens’ right?” Bryce asked hopefully.

  “Yeah. I’m good with whatever quality time I get to spend with you.”

  “Speaking of quality time, I think it’s about time we get back to my room.” Bryce didn’t need to elaborate.

  *

  The next morning Bryce awoke to a soft tapping on her door. It took her a moment to realize it was her Mom trying to wake her for her morning shift at the pool. She fumbled for her iPhone on the bedside table and realized with a jolt that she had overslept. She had been so busy with Leah, she had forgotten to set her alarm. As soon as the thought formed she also noticed Leah draped over her. The covers had been kicked down to the end of the bed, and they were both dressed only in their underwear.

  Fuzzy warm memories slowly crept into Bryce’s sleepy mind. She and Leah had spent hours listening to each other’s favorite music, wrapped tightly in each other’s arms. Late into the night Bryce had been drifting slowly into sleep when she felt Leah’s soft lips brush against hers just as one of her own favorite ballads started to play from the iPod speakers next to the bed. All feelings of drowsiness had fled in a rush of eager passion.

  Bryce smiled dreamily at the remembrance of the blissful hours spent exploring each other’s bodies and experiencing real intimacy for the first time. She reveled in the warmth of Leah’s body next to hers and snuggled in closer to her sleeping form.

  Then everything happened in a blur.

  She heard her doorknob slowly beginning to turn and with a rush of fear she remembered she had also forgotten to lock her bedroom door. She had to get up before—

  It was too late. Her mother was standing in her doorway, looking at her in abject horror. She scrambled out from under Leah’s embrace and tumbled onto the floor next to her bed, her eyes never leaving her mother’s.

  “Mom, it’s—”

  “Get…her…out of my house, Bryce.”

  “But, Mom—”

  “Now!”

  Bryce’s hand trembled as she turned around, still on her knees next to the bed, and shook Leah’s shoulder to wake her.

  Leah stretched and smiled as she slowly opened her eyes. Her smile immediately froze in place when she looked over Bryce’s shoulder and saw what must have been a terrifying look in the older woman’s eyes. Her glance shot back to Bryce, who could hear Leah’s frantic thoughts as if they were her own.

  “You have to go, Leah. I’ll call you later, okay?” Bryce’s voice shook.

  Leah simply nodded and got up on the opposite side of the bed, trying in vain to hide her nudity. No one said anything as she quickly gathered her wildly scattered clothing and dressed with trembling hands. In less than thirty seconds, she edged past Bryce’s unmoving mother, down the stairs, and out of the house.

  Bryce shakily got to her feet and put on the workout shorts and T-shirt that had been lying next to her bed. Whatever
was about to happen, she didn’t want to feel even more vulnerable by being half-naked.

  When she was done, she stood and faced her mother, bracing herself for a fight. Her mother’s frizzy dark blond hair was exploding from its usually well-crafted helmet style, and Bryce struggled to meet her gaze. She looked like a Midwestern Medusa who wanted nothing more than to turn the whole world to stone. Bryce had never seen such fury. She knew her mom was judgmental and holier than thou at times, but she never seemed to anger quickly. The fire in her eyes scared the hell out of her.

  “Mom, Leah—”

  “You will never say that whore’s name in my presence again.” She spoke with livid calmness.

  Bryce only blinked.

  “We did not raise you to be like…like this.” Her mother gestured with disgust in her direction. “How dare you commit such filthy acts in this house?”

  “Mom, we—”

  “I don’t want to hear it, Bryce!” Her mother’s hands flew to her face, covering her eyes to block out the shame she saw before her. It took a minute for her to regain her composure. She unconsciously wrapped her fist around the ever-present gold cross that hung at her neck. “You know God will punish you for what you have done. You must ask for forgiveness.”

  Enough. “God will punish me for being born gay?” Bryce couldn’t believe that the words came out of her mouth, but out they were determined to pour. “He’ll punish me for the way He made me? Mom, I’m the same good person I’ve always been! The same smart, genuine, hardworking girl you’ve always been so proud of! Why should it matter that I’m attracted to women?”

  “God doesn’t create perverts!” her mother screamed. “You will burn in hell if you give in to this disgusting lifestyle!”

  Bryce’s mouth hung open in shock. She didn’t know how to respond.

  Her mother advanced on her quickly and Bryce tripped backward, falling onto her bed.

  With her finger in Bryce’s face she said quietly, “You are joining the United States military. They don’t let filthy…lesbians”—Her nose crinkled in disgust as she said the word—“into the service. You are about to ruin your life. Throw away everything you’ve worked for!”