Nothing to Lose

by Angela Winters

  “How will I know you’ll do it?” Erica asked. “You lie all the time.”

  “I don’t lie all the time,” he protested, “but all I can give you is my word. I respected your mother tremendously. And, even though you’re acting like a brat, Achelle deserves to have her name cleared. I’ll handle it.”

  “Good.” Erica turned and headed for the door. When she reached it, she turned back to him. “And from now on, leave Alex out of your dirty dealings.”

  “Mind your own business,” Jonah said. “I’ll do what I want.”

  “Ugh!” She threw her hands in the air and left his office. He didn’t deserve a good-bye in her opinion.

  She was extremely frustrated just thinking about Juliet’s accusations. But for some reason, she believed Jonah. It was crazy, but she had a feeling that whatever it was he had with her mother was real enough that she could count on him to at least clear her name with his wife. He was right. She deserved that.

  Regarding Alex, Erica didn’t know what to think, but she was afraid for him. Jonah could pull him in and then he’d stop being the great guy she had come to care about so much.

  Sitting on a park bench after eating lunch, Billie was checking her face in her pocket mirror. She’d hoped to clean up before going back to the office, but she wasn’t having much luck. Lately she’d been crying often. It wasn’t just that the person she loved most in the world hated her, but it was that she deserved it. She deserved all of it.

  She was blaming Porter for being an asshole or Michael for not understanding. She wasn’t willing to face up to her own weaknesses and faults. She’d gotten a taste of power and felt like she could get justice for wrongs done to her in the past. For once in her life, she felt in control and thought she could do whatever she wanted. No, she thought she was entitled to do whatever she wanted.

  With Michael ignoring her and Tara feeling worse than ever, Billie reached a low she hadn’t felt in a long, long time. It was similar to how she’d felt when her marriage first fell apart and Tara begged her not to leave, but she had to. She’d felt like such a failure.

  She watched as a couple sat down on the bench less than twenty feet from her. They had to be at least in their eighties. Still holding hands, they sat and looked around. The woman made eye contact with Billie and smiled softly. Billie smiled back, noting the look of happiness and contentment on the woman’s face.

  She wondered, how long had they been together? How many kids did they have? How many grandchildren? How many times had one of them hurt the other and thought it was over, only to figure out he or she couldn’t be without the other? How many times had one failed and the other lifted the spouse up with love and support?

  The man looked at the woman and said her name. She’d been looking at a pigeon on the grass, but she looked back at him. He winked at her and she giggled, squeezing his hand more tightly.

  Billie felt her heart catch in her throat at that small gesture. She wanted to cry—but not the painful crying she’d been doing this last week. No, she wanted to cry from joy at seeing real, enduring love.

  This was what she wanted—what she’d always wanted. She’d thought she’d had it with Porter, but it didn’t happen. She had blamed him, claiming his affair ruined it all. It broke their marriage, but he didn’t ruin it all by himself. She allowed herself to believe that the way he’d treated her ever since she left him was his fault alone. It wasn’t, though. She’d let him in her bed. She’d let him tell her lies. She’d let his touch mean more to her than her self-esteem.

  She was still so angry because that enduring love had been ripped from her, and she’d thought she knew who was to blame. But nothing was that simple, and she was a big-enough girl to face up to that. Finally . . . but probably too late.

  Erica was nervous as hell as she knocked on the door to Alex’s office at campaign headquarters, but she knew she had to face him. It was ridiculous for her to continue bending over backward to avoid running into him. She had ignored any texts or e-mails from him that weren’t strictly work-related. She’d made excuses to avoid their usual lunch together, or she’d made sure that she left for lunch while he was still in a meeting.

  She didn’t care what Jonah wanted. Yes, there was a part of her that craved pleasing him, right alongside the part of her that wanted to tell him to go to hell every time she came face-to-face with him. It was not the father/daughter relationship she had in mind, and she imagined it would never be what she’d wanted. But she wasn’t about to let him get in her head so much that she couldn’t move on with her life.

  “Come in!” Alex yelled.

  When she entered, he was talking on his cell phone, but stopped the second he saw her. Erica sensed surprise and annoyance in his expression.

  She closed the door behind her and walked over to his desk as he quickly finished his phone call and placed his phone on his desk.

  “Long time, no see,” she said with a cautious, almost questioning tone.

  Alex nodded. “So you’re not ignoring me anymore, or is this about work?”

  She sighed, walking around the desk. She leaned against it, trying to appear as humble as she felt.

  “I know I’ve been a bitch about this, Alex. I’m sorry. I genuinely am.”

  “It was just a kiss,” Alex said. “You acted as if we’d almost had sex.”

  “It was just unexpected.”

  “Was it really?” Alex asked, looking up at her. “I feel like this has been building between us for a while. Was it completely one-sided?”

  “No,” she assured him. “It wasn’t. Obviously, we were growing . . . We were becoming good friends.”

  “Friends?” He laughed, leaning forward. “Wow, I guess I had this all wrong.”

  “This isn’t easy for me, Alex. Please give me a chance.”

  He nodded, sitting back.

  “I don’t have a trusting nature,” she said. “Growing up without a father and . . . Just where I was, I had to be on my toes all the time. It’s a coping mechanism to believe I shouldn’t trust someone, shouldn’t get close to them.”

  “You’ve proven yourself to be someone I can trust,” she continued. “Even though that whole scenario with Terrell threw me for a loop, I know you did it because you care about me.”

  “I do,” Alex said, quickly getting up from his chair.

  Erica was a little startled at the sudden action, but she didn’t move. He was standing next to her, facing her, only a few inches from her.

  “I don’t want explanations,” he said. “Erica, I want to know how you feel.”

  “I—”

  The door to his office swung openly suddenly and Jonah entered, yelling Alex’s name in a dangerous tone. They both turned to face him. The second he realized what the scene was, or what it appeared to be, the dark expression on his face grew even darker.

  “What in the hell is going on here?” he asked, entering the room.

  “Nothing.” Erica quickly stepped away from Alex and walked around the desk.

  “We discussed this, Erica.” He eyed her sternly.

  “Nothing was going on,” she repeated.

  “You both looked very close,” he accused. “Is this what you’re getting paid to do?”

  “Sir,” Alex began, “we’re working very hard. You can be assured—”

  “I can’t be assured of anything with you,” Jonah responded sharply.

  Alex looked genuinely shocked and offended. It made Erica angry. Why was he so mad? What was going on?

  “Jonah—”

  “You’re to blame for this too, Erica,” he said.

  “We were just talking!” she yelled.

  Erica noticed that Alex looked surprised at her tone. He gave her a warning glance, as if to tell her to watch it. She imagined Alex must have thought she was crazy for yelling at Jonah.

  “Not that,” Jonah said, pointing to the place where they’d been standing when he entered. “I’m talking about DC Whisperings!”

  �
�What is that?” Erica asked.

  “It’s a blog,” Alex said. “It’s a gossip blog, mostly about national politicians and society people in D.C. What happened?”

  “The campaign got a call from the editor,” Jonah said. “They posted a picture of me and my wife at a fund-raising dinner party. One of their commenters said they had undeniable proof that I’ve cheated on my wife—DNA proof!”

  “DNA proof?” Erica asked, knowing exactly what that meant.

  “Are we talking about some kind of little blue dress?” Alex asked, referring to the President Clinton sex scandal.

  “Worse than that,” Jonah said, looking at Erica.

  Erica felt her stomach tighten as she realized what Terrell was planning to do. He wasn’t just going to expose Jonah’s relationship with Sherise. He was going to expose her own relationship with Jonah. Now that she made it clear that he was out of her life, he was going to try and hurt her as well!

  “What is worse?” Alex asked, confused. He then looked at Erica, perplexed, but she only shrugged in response. Jonah was giving up way too much.

  Jonah pointed accusingly at Alex. “You were supposed to pay Terrell, and he was supposed to leave town and stay out of this.”

  “I did exactly what you said,” Alex said.

  “You don’t know it’s him,” Erica stated.

  “I don’t?” Jonah asked. “It only took our IT guy a few minutes to track down the commenter. They haven’t gotten a home address, but it’s coming from Columbia Heights. Right near where your thug of an ex-boyfriend lives now.”

  “Are you sure of that?” she asked. “How did they do that?”

  “That’s not important,” Jonah said. “What is important is that you both failed, and DC Whisperings wants to know more.”

  “That’s manageable,” Alex said. He walked back to his desk and grabbed his cell phone. “It’s just a gossip blog. They all try to break these stories, but they’re not professionals. They can be dealt with. We can put a stop—”

  “Not you,” Jonah said. “You’ve done enough here. I’ve put Laura on it.”

  Alex looked extremely upset that he’d been passed over for this crisis. “But, sir, I know much more than Laura about—”

  “You’re out of this one,” Jonah said. “Both of you!”

  “If you’d just listened to me,” Erica stated.

  “Enough!” The force of his words startled her. Jonah was almost menacingly angry. “I fought in fucking wars,” he said. “I’ll be damned if I let some punk hustler make me weak. He’s done!” He turned and stormed out of the office.

  “Jonah!” Erica called after him.

  “What is he . . .” Alex rushed over to her. “Erica, you’re shaking again.”

  She turned to him. “You have to help me, Alex.”

  “With what?”

  “He’s going to hurt Terrell,” she said. “I think he might do worse.”

  “Jonah?” Alex was shaking his head. “He’ll probably just threaten him. I know how these things go. They threaten someone with exposing their own past or—”

  “No, he’s not going to do that.” Erica grabbed Alex’s hands in hers. “Please, you have to help me get Terrell somewhere safe before Jonah gets to him.”

  “But why—”

  “Alex! You have to trust me! Just trust me. Will you help me?”

  He looked apprehensive, but he nodded. “What do you want me to do?”

  “We have to call his job,” she said. “Tell him to get out of there now and we’ll meet him.”

  He shook his head. “I’ll bet he quit his job after he got the payment.”

  “Then his apartment,” she said. “We have to get to him.”

  “If he’s in Columbia Heights, my mom lives pretty close to him,” Alex said. “We’ll take him there for now.”

  “Let’s go,” Erica said. “I just hope we aren’t too late.”

  16

  Sherise’s eyes were closed, her face looking upward to catch all of the sun on this beautiful early afternoon. She thought she was going to have to get back on the exercise wagon to control her weight gain with this pregnancy. Now that things were about to lighten her load, she’d have time to do that, like take a long walk in the sun with her husband.

  “What is this shit?”

  Sherise opened her eyes to the sound of Elena’s fake Midwestern accent.

  “Oh, hi, Elena.” Sherise pointed to the chair across the table from her. “Have a seat.”

  Elena looked around. “I’m supposed to be meeting someone else here. The host must have sent me to the wrong—”

  “You’re at the right table,” Sherise said. “Dennis isn’t coming. A friend at the firm got ahold of his phone while he was in the bathroom and sent you that text. You’re here to see me.”

  “No, I’m not.” Elena placed her purse over her shoulder and looked down at Sherise in a menacing way. “I don’t have to talk to you. I’m about to sue—”

  “No, you’re not,” Sherise said impatiently. “Stop making a spectacle of yourself and sit down.”

  “What I’m going to do,” Elena said, with a pointing finger, “is call my lawyer and file a harassment claim against you now.”

  “I’d think twice before doing that,” a deep voice said.

  Elena’s mouth fell open at the sight of Justin as he came around the curtain and approached their table.

  “What are you . . .” She was getting suddenly nervous. “You’re not allowed to come near me.”

  “You don’t have a restraining order against him,” Sherise said. “There’s no law that says he can’t be near you.”

  “This won’t look good for the case,” she said, smirking.

  “There’s not gonna be a case.” Justin sat down. “Your lies have caught up with you, Elena.”

  Elena gave a haughty huff. “Is that what you think?”

  “It’s what we know.” Sherise placed the file, which was in her purse, on the table. “Now sit down, Ms. Brown.”

  The smirk on Elena’s face disappeared as she looked from Sherise to Justin and then to the file on the table.

  “What’s that?” she asked.

  “It’s a copy of everything,” Sherise said. “Yours to keep.”

  “Everything?” she asked, finally taking a seat.

  “Is this really all about revenge?” Justin asked.

  “I don’t have to justify myself to you,” Elena said. “I have a witness and—”

  “Dennis isn’t going to be able to help you after this,” Sherise said. “We know that your dad worked for Okun Industries for, what, thirty-five years?”

  Elena swallowed hard, not saying a word.

  “When the executives at Okun realized they had mismanaged the company, they knew they were going down.” Sherise watched with a smile as Elena’s expression changed. “They had run out of money and the debtors were pounding on their door. They’d already laid off half the workers.”

  “It’s not uncommon for companies to use pension funds to pay debts,” Justin stressed.

  Elena’s expression hardened. “But they didn’t use it to pay off their debt. They used it to pay themselves bonuses before declaring bankruptcy and shutting down the company.”

  “What they did was wrong,” Justin agreed. “It’s not supposed to be used like that, but it’s not a crime.”

  “It was a crime,” she said, “until you made it legal.”

  Justin shook his head. “This is sick, Elena.”

  Sherise continued her summary. “So your daddy lost his pension when Okun raided it, and you blame Justin?”

  “I was doing my job,” Justin explained.

  “Your firm’s aggressive lobbying changed that law,” Elena said. “What you did, made it possible for them to get away with it.”

  “You could have sued them,” Justin said. “There are recourses for employees who—”

  Elena laughed and Sherise heard something in that laugh. Elena was an angry woma
n full of pain. She was bordering on the edge of sanity. Sherise wanted to feel sorry for her, but she couldn’t. If she’d targeted anyone else, Sherise would try and find sympathy, but Elena hadn’t.

  “Do you know how you sound?” Elena asked. “You push for these laws, knowing the consequences can destroy lives, take away everything that decent people have worked for, and console yourself by saying that they have legal recourse. It all works out, right?”

  “So you plot revenge,” Sherise said. “You change your name. You get an internship on Capitol Hill. You did well, considering all the lying you had on your résumé.”

  “Dennis helped you,” Justin said. “I know he did. How else would you get to the firm with such a shady background?”

  “Men are stupid,” Elena said flatly, as if not caring anymore.

  “You wanted a big payday,” Sherise said. “Justin was collateral damage.”

  “No!” Elena slammed her fist on the table.

  “Take it easy,” Justin warned, looking around.

  “He wasn’t collateral damage,” Elena said. “He was the head of that lobbying effort. Justin and the firm made tons and tons of money making it possible for Okun to destroy my family’s life. Dennis told me everything.”

  “You know that Dennis was supposed to head that up,” Justin said.

  “He was taken off that case,” Elena argued, “because he told the heads at the firm that he didn’t agree with it anymore.”

  Sherise laughed. “He played you, bitch.”

  “Dennis was taken off the case because he was showing up for meetings drunk,” Justin explained. “The client almost fired us. He went to AA after that.”

  Elena’s indignation slipped away as she looked from Justin to Sherise.

  “I guess he used you too,” Sherise said. “He wanted to get in your panties and get back at Justin for taking over his account. Did you promise to share the money with him?”

  Sherise realized that Elena was still holding on to hope, and it was a waste of time.

  “Look, honey,” Sherise said, “it’s over. We have all the evidence we need. Look in the folder. There’s even a picture of you and Dennis making out in Bartholdi Park last week.”