by Lara Swann
That he’s here and everything will be okay.
I finally break down sobbing myself, the shock and terror of what might have happened to my nephew…to the kid I love more than I can say…all of it finally overwhelming me.
And with Josh, I can do that. He rides the storm with me, rubbing my back, kissing my temple, the edges of my eyes, my cheeks…
Until his mouth hovers over my lips.
And I push up.
I want it. I want him. More than I want to think about right now.
He takes my mouth in his, kissing me with an urgency and passion that I’d been scared had been all in my head.
I melt into him, my whole body surrendering to his strength. Using more than just his physical presence to bolster my own.
I kiss him until I’m struggling for breath. Until I can taste the salt of my tears in between us. Until my head feels light and I see stars and I finally feel that actually, things might be okay.
“I’m so glad you were here.” I finally say, my voice soft, as we break the kiss.
He squeezes me closer in response, his chin resting against my head, and I bury myself into his chest.
Happier than I could have imagined that the uncomfortable silence between us has broken.
And I have Josh back.
Whatever Josh is to me now.
Chapter Twelve
Josh
I run my hands through my hair, the shower steaming around me as I slick it back and finally wash out the gunk from the lake.
It felt like we stayed there for a long time before anyone was ready to return to the main house - and while holding Cassie again had left me feeling better than I had all day, I’d really started to stink.
The images flick over my mind in the shower, and I can’t help reliving it - the screaming, the dive, that crazy rush of adrenaline and the driving fear that it wouldn’t work, that I wouldn’t be in time that pushed me to go just a little faster, find just a little more energy and speed.
I shudder and notch the heat up further, letting it burn at my raw skin and scour away that thought.
It worked out. You made it. He’s okay.
I give myself a few minutes for the jagged spikes of fear to settle again, then I finally shut off the shower and step out of it.
By the time I walk out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around my waist, Cassie is waiting for me in our room.
She looks up at me, half-hesitant, but I don’t even stop. I just walk right up to her and wrap her in my arms again, bringing her close. I’m almost naked, and the softness of her hair brushing against my bare chest would be enough to do things to me, except we’re still both preoccupied by everything that’s just happened.
“They didn’t need a doctor anymore?” I ask after a few moments stood together like that.
“No, Lucas is fine, just a little shaken up. We all are.” She shifts back, just a little, and looks up at me. I brush a strand of hair back behind her ear and she gives me a little smile. “All he really needs right now is his Mom.”
I nod, and gently stroke the back of her hair. All I can think about is how precious she is.
And how happy I am to have her back in my arms now. Knowing that she, and Lucas, and everyone else, is safe and well.
This day has been killer.
And I know there’s still so much unspoken between us, after last night. I can still feel it hanging over us, but I’m more than willing to ignore it for now.
I don’t know how Cassie feels about any of it, and if there’s one thing I know about this girl, it’s that she needs space to work things out for herself. As tempting as it’s been to walk straight up to her, drag her into my arms and kiss her until she’s seeing stars all fucking day.
Last night fucking blew my mind, and I thought I knew what good sex felt like. Cassie’s always told me, perfectly matter-of-fact, how good she is in bed. Hell, we’ve even made it something of a competition, who can slip the most comments about our sexual prowess into a conversation.
But…fuck.
It shouldn’t surprise me that she meant it.
But still.
Fuck.
And after a night like that…with anyone else, we wouldn’t keep our hands off each other all day. We’d be at it for hours, trying to sate an impossible need, and enjoying every mind-blowing failure.
Instead, I haven’t touched her. At all.
Fuck my life.
But with Cassie…it’s not just sex. And we’re not two strangers. Or even lovers.
There’s too much stuff floating around us. And Cassie is nothing if not prone to over-thinking.
So I waited for her. Throwing every acting skill I have into pretending to be her irritated boyfriend, in the middle of some fight, unable to respond to any of the occasional heated, uncertain glances she was giving me.
Even if it drove me fucking crazy.
“I came to find you.” Cassie says after a while. “Everyone wondered where you’d disappeared off to.”
“I figured I’d give you all some space, after everything…thought you’d want to be together for a bit.” I say. “Also, I stank.”
She laughs at that. “So did everyone. Hell, I probably do too.”
I have to bite my tongue hard not to offer to help her with that.
All the things we used to say so easily to each other are now…Confusing. Fraught. Dangerous.
It’s not just her that’s uncertain about this.
Except I’m the one who knows how I want it to end.
It’s just this middle part that’s complicated as fuck.
“You’re the hero of the hour, you know.” She gives me a wry smile, then rolls her eyes. “I think they were confused why you didn’t stick around for the glory.”
I shake my head. “They don’t know me very well.”
She pauses at that, and I notice what I just said.
“No…they don’t.” She sighs, resting her head against my chest. “Though I think John and Maria would forgive you anything now, and I’m not sure whether everyone else is too far behind. All those issues you spent so long emphasizing…”
“It’s alright.” I say. “Even if they end up liking me, they can still be relieved if we break up. And you can act devastated enough to get them off your back.”
I’m not quite sure why I’m reassuring Cassie about that, but…that was what we were here for.
“I guess.” After a moment, she nods. “We might have to step things up a bit, though. We go home in a couple of days, so our big blow out needs to be ready for that.”
I murmur something affirmative, even if the idea of it is starting to bother me.
It was always the plan, but…
I kiss her instead of finishing that thought. Partly to distract me. Partly because she’s right here in my arms. And partly because I haven’t done that enough today.
She opens up to me the way she has done every time, her body relaxing into mine and our tongues tangling together in a memory of our bodies last night. My cock stirs beneath the towel, fire lacing my body and wanting so much more, but I shift just a little away from her instead. She’s probably noticed my reaction anyway, but at least this way she can pretend she hasn’t.
When it ends, Cassie looks up at me, her eyes clouded with heat and uncertainty, but her pulse beating harder in her throat. She worries at her bottom lip, making me think of kissing it again, and then sighs in a way that makes her entire body move with the gesture
“This whole thing hasn’t exactly gone as I intended.” She finally says.
“Because of Lucas?” I ask, tilting my head.
Even though I know that’s not really what she’s talking about.
“Yeah, and…this.” She gestures to the air in between us, and shakes her head. “What are we doing here, Josh?”
I look back at her, and she seems so lost that I just want to pull her into me, hold her tight and never let her go.
I know what I want to say.
> I want to say fuck it to the whole ridiculous plan.
Tell her that we should forget about breaking up, let her family see who I really am, and see what happens if we give this a real go.
It would fix all our problems.
Except the one where she’s trying to avoid getting into a relationship.
And the one where she wonders what the fuck will happen to our friendship if we fuck it up.
That took me a long time to think about.
And she’s had one day.
It’s too much, and I know it. So instead, I turn the question back on her.
“What do you want to do, Cassie?” I ask, my voice low.
“I…don’t know.” Her eyes latch onto mine, both of us trying to read each other. Trying not to say the wrong thing.
We’ve never had that problem before, and I can’t help wondering just what she’s hoping from me.
“Do you regret last night, Cassie?” I finally say, and I can’t help the seductive undertone to it as I see the way she’s looking at me. “Because I won’t say that I’m sorry it happened. I’m not sorry at all.”
“No…I’m not sorry either.” She whispers, barely voicing it out loud.
My mouth curves into a smile at that, and I can feel the heat radiating from my body as I shift just a little bit closer. It’s too much to ignore. Too much to deny.
I’ve barely tasted her and I already feel addicted to this girl.
“Do you want to do it again?” The question is out there before I can think better of it, but it’s the only thing on my mind right now.
Maybe we can’t throw off the fake part of our relationship. Not just yet. But…that doesn’t mean we can’t have this.
Her eyes widen, but the spark of heat there turns into a flare, and I can read the answer written there as clear as day.
If she can just say it.
It takes a long moment, but it finally comes.
“Yes.” She bites her lip as she admits it, and that’s enough to almost send me into an orgasmic spasm right there.
“Then…why don’t we?” I move closer towards her, my hand cupping the back of her neck as I bring her in to my body.
She gasps, barely noticeable but there, and I feel her shift under me. Closer. Wanting more.
My cock starts to harden against the barely-there towel, and my lips lower to hers, nibbling and teasing as she wraps her arms around my shoulders.
“But…” She starts, even as she’s kissing me back. Even as she’s pressing against my crotch and making me groan with anticipation.
I ease back just enough to let her speak, ignoring the longing to throw her back on the bed and drive her speechless
I want this time to be deliberate.
I can see the confusion written across her face, even as I’m pretty sure she’d rather I take the throwing her on the bed option and leave this conversation hanging over us.
“I’m…I don’t understand, Josh.” She says, uncertain. “What about…what happens when we get back?”
The question she’s been thinking about all day, I’m pretty certain - especially since she relaxes, just a little, after finally voicing it out loud.
“I don’t know, Cassie.” I answer honestly, but try and appear unconcerned about it. “This whole week has been…different. I’m not sure either. But, I don’t know - why don’t we wait until we’re back, to see what happens then.”
It’s not really an answer, but it’s the best I have. I don’t know what’s going to happen, and I don’t think now is the right time to work it out. Not with her family all around and what she thinks this week is all about to confuse everything.
She hesitates a moment, but I know she’ll agree.
All either of us really wants right now is to delay it. A mutual understanding that we don’t need to worry about it now. That we can continue being…whatever the hell we’re being right now.
And do the thinking later.
“Okay.” She finally nods. “We’ll…see what happens when we get back, then.”
“And continue doing this now?” I grin at her, my mouth playing over hers again as I start backing her up to the bed. She goes easily, and I can already tell how eager she is. “Might as well have a little fun while we’ve got the chance, hmm?”
She moans in response, and I’m done talking.
I pick her up easily in my arms, and finally get to throw her onto the bed, watching as she lands on her back with a cry of surprised laughter.
My towel has fallen away in the process, and she’s left staring at me in all my raw, exposed glory.
I give her my best cocky smile and watch as her eyes dilate, her breath hitching slightly.
I move my hand from my hip as she watches, taking my thick shaft in my fist and slowly starting to stroke it. My biceps bulge with the motion, and I know what seeing my firm hand around my cock does to women. Cassie is no exception, except she actually acts on it - her legs spreading and her own hand creeping down under her jeans.
I moan at the sight of it, at the tempting hint of what’s happening under there, knowing her juices will be flowing freely now, and hearing those little gasps and noises as she starts to enjoy herself as well. Her eyes are fixated on me, partly fascinated by my own motion, and partly challenging me to join her.
It’s not an invitation I can pass up for long, and as my cock starts to throb hard in my grip, I nudge closer towards her on my knees.
“You’ve got…entirely too many clothes on.” I say, guttural and intense.
“D’you think?” She asks, in a sweet voice that almost makes me question those hot, fuck-me eyes.
I smile dangerously, coming forward to land over her, my mouth on her lips, her throat, her chin.
“Let me help you with that, baby.” I murmur, my tongue and lips making her start gasping against me.
“I…don’t like…you calling me baby.” She breathes, but she’s kissing my neck now too, trying to press up against me and feel more.
“Mm, well…I like it.” I say, distracted by the indent just above her collarbone, and the way she shivers every time I breathe over it.
“Fucking…asshole.” She mutters, her hips coming around mine now, before I’ve even started tackling her clothes.
“That’s what…you wanted, right?” I laugh against her, and barely catching her flipping me off before my mouth dips lower.
A thrill ripples through me at the banter. The kind of thing we’ve always shared. Just…not usually during sex.
Somehow, it makes it even better.
I slip open the buttons on her top as my mouth reaches it, her firm breasts pressing through and up against me and the delicate lacy bra she’s wearing exposing them perfectly. I groan at the sight, and barely manage to finish with the buttons before I’m ripping the top off and kissing and nibbling the top of those beautiful tits.
She gasps, and then she’s reaching behind to unhook her bra and throw it off too, thrusting her chest up into my face and practically demanding more.
I’m only too happy to oblige, and my mouth finds one nipple a moment later, while my hand strokes and teases the other. I suck hard, groaning at how good it feels, my cock full and pulsing against her while I make her gasp and squeal under me.
She wriggles under me, and then I feel her shimmying out of her jeans and kicking them off. I chuckle even as I roll her tits in my fingers and she gasps up at me.
“I’m…doing…a better job with the clothes than you.” She mutters.
“I’m a little…distracted.” I grunt in response, caught between amusement and desire.
My tongue and mouth flick between her breasts, my hands running down her soft, delicate skin and the feel of it driving me crazy with need.
She bucks up against me, and I can feel the wetness of her entrance against my hard, aching cock.
“Fuck…I want you.” I groan as I press myself against her, remembering just how fucking good she felt last night.
L
ooking down this time and seeing her bright, hot eyes looking up at me. Aware and wanting this. Wanting me.
“Then…fucking…take me.” She gasps, her pulse jumping in her throat as I growl in response.
I’m done with the niceties - with the idea of a slow tease or drawn out pleasure.
I know exactly what I want, and I’ve waited too long today to get it.
I position myself right in front of her, then grab her hips and slam inside.
She feels amazing. Blissful. Wet and tight and so perfect as she cries out and stretches to accommodate me.
I lean down to kiss her, not letting up for a moment now, and from the look on her face that’s the last thing she’d want.
I ravage her mouth with mine as my hands pull her into me, fucking her hard and fast and making her cry out again and again. I can feel her pussy trying to grip hold of me, trying to pull me in and suck me deeper, and I don’t even give it a chance, letting the burn of friction between us drive us both higher.
She’s gasping and crying now, moaning desperately as she clutches at my shoulders and urges me on - higher, faster, harder. Everything I want and more.
I take her breasts in my hands, teasing and playing with the hard, sensitive nubs as I feel the build inside me, as my cock throbs with the need I’ve been trying to ignore all day and I can’t stop thinking that I’ve got her. I’ve got Cassie.
She’s underneath me. Taken. Owned. Possessed.
Everything I want, right here.
“Cassie…god…fuck it…”
I’m muttering anything that comes into my head now, and I hear the same on her lips. My name. Again and again as I don’t let up. I tilt my hips, just a little, and it makes every hard thrust bump up against her clit. She gasps, her eyes opening wide as she looks up at me, and I grin devilishly back at her.
“Josh…ohhh…” She moans and it goes right through my body.
My cock pulses hard inside her, and I can feel myself on the edge. Wanting her there too. Wanting to feel her go over with me, to have her clenching around my cock.
I lean down and take her breast in my mouth, suckling hard and tugging at her other tit with my hand.
She cries out, and it breaks in the middle, her hips thrusting up to meet me and our bodies bumping together.
