Forbid Me

by M. Robinson

  He sighed. “The first time I kissed her she was fifteen.”

  Lucas scoffed, stepping toward him, but Jacob didn’t move a muscle, ready to take whatever blow my brother was going to throw at him.

  “You’re telling me you put the moves on my fifteen-year-old baby sister when you were twenty fucking two years old?” Lucas gritted out, his fist clenching at his side with a deadly stare.

  “It wasn’t like that. Your mom had just been diagnosed. I found her on the beach—”

  “You fucking took advantage of her? You piece—”

  “Stop!” I screamed, coming in between them. “Please stop this. You’re ruining it,” I said with tears forming in my eyes. “He didn’t take advantage of me. He was there for me… he’s always been there for me. I’m not going to let you or anyone make that into something that it’s not. Do you fucking understand me? I love you more than anything, Lucas. But I won’t let you make our already fucked up situation into something seedy and ugly. I won’t let you take away some of the best memories of my life. Not after everything we’ve been through,” I stated, my voice shaking.

  “Lily, I just found out that this has been going on since you were fifteen years old, behind my back and you expect me to stand here and be okay with that?”

  “I stayed away from her after that. I shut her out because she was a kid and I was a grown ass man. I had the same thoughts as you do right now. It’s always been my number one concern, Lucas. Up until a year and a half ago, I hadn’t seen her in three years. Three fucking years, I stayed away from her. I won’t do that again. I didn’t want you to find out this way. I never wanted you to find out this way. I want a life with her. I want what you have with Alex. I want that more than anything in this world. I promise you that I will never hurt her again. She’s mine. She’s mine forever. This isn’t us dating or getting to know each other, I want to marry her.”

  Lucas jerked back, stunned. “What?”

  “You heard me.”

  “Bo.”

  His gaze went to Alex.

  “I told you. They love each other. He loves her as much as you love me and vice versa. They’re meant to be together like we are. Please, let them be. They want your blessing. That’s all they’ve ever wanted.” She gritted out.

  “Half-Pint… I… I’m sorry… I just…” He shook his head and my heart pounded in my chest with the words I knew were coming.

  “I can’t… I’m sorry I can’t…”

  “Lucas,” Jacob called out after him as he left the room.

  I bowed my head, tears falling down my face.

  My brother’s words breaking my heart.

  I took her into my arms, hugging her as tight as I could.

  “I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry,” I whispered into her ear. I had promised her she wouldn’t lose him.

  “I’ll talk to him. He’ll come around. You know how Lucas is, he’s stubborn and he needs time to reflect. I promise he will come around,” Alex sympathized, rubbing Lily’s back.

  I held her the entire time she broke down, and all that I feared was that she was thinking about her mom, sad that she had lost another person. If this would have been before she died, I know Lily would have been stronger, but she didn’t want to lose another member of her family, especially not like this. The longer she cried, the more pissed off I got, my temper looming and I could feel it fucking pumping through my veins. After she had calmed down, Alex told her she needed to take a hot bath, that it would make her feel better. I had never been more grateful to have Half-Pint there. She knew me and what I wanted to do. Lucas and I needed to work this out without having Lily present.

  Man to man.

  I knew where I would find him. He would be taking out his frustrations on the waves. I walked down the patio stairs and onto the beach as he was getting out of the water.

  “Don’t fucking try me, Jacob, not right now,” he spit out with a menacing tone.

  “Or what? You’re going to hit me again? Fucking do it! Hit me. Come on hit me, as many goddamn times as you want, if it’s going to make you realize that this isn’t going away. I’m not leaving her. I’m right fucking here, waiting!”

  He threw down his board into the sand and shoved me. “I thought you were my friend!” He pushed me again. “I thought you were my brother!”

  “I am! Don’t you fucking see that! Jesus Christ, Lucas, it’s been almost ten years, ten fucking years for us to get to this point!”

  “You think that matters to me? I don’t give a shit if you would have waited twenty! She’s my fucking baby sister, you piece of shit!” He charged me, ramming his one shoulder into my ribs. His momentum propelled my body into the sand where he landed on top of me, having the advantage. “I can’t even fucking look at her! All I see is your hands all over her!” He threw the first punch, his fist connecting with my cheek. I laid there taking it.

  “Do you feel better? Hit me again!”

  He did, he hit me four more times after that. Twice in the jaw and twice in the ribs, before getting off of me, stumbling back a little. He regained his balance and hovered above me. If looks could kill, I’d be dead.

  I rolled over getting on my hands and knees, spitting blood in the sand.

  “I loved you. I fucking trusted you, man! I sent her to you! What, Jacob, did you fuck her the entire week? Huh? I guess you made a fool out of me didn’t you?”

  I stood, wiping my mouth, never taking my gaze off his. “That’s not what happened, you have to fucking know me better than that.”

  “I don’t fucking know anything anymore. I can’t think about how many times I left you alone with her. I was supposed to protect her, yet I handed her right fucking to you. Do you know how sick that makes me?”

  “You know that’s not true.” I touched my ribs, hissing upon contact.

  “I don’t know shit. I don’t know you at all.”

  “Fuck, Lucas! What do you want from me, man? I’m telling you the truth,” I roared, spitting more blood into the sand.

  “Its too late for that, Jacob! I already saw my baby sister sucking your fucking cock!” He shoved me hard. I stumbled but remained upright.

  I winced, that was a low blow.

  “Yeah… so you tell me. What am I supposed to do now? Since you have all the answers, asshole?”

  “You can hate me. You hate me all you want. I can take it. But Lily? Lily is upstairs bawling because she thinks she lost another family member. She doesn’t deserve that. She’s done nothing wrong.”

  He jerked back.

  “She loves you. She loves you so damn much. I hate that this is happening. I hate that I can’t do anything about it. But please, do not take it out on her.”

  “What the fuck, man? How could you do this? How am I supposed to get passed this?” He started to pace back and forth, hands pulling at his hair.

  “I didn’t do it to you, Lucas. I love her. I’ve tried not loving her. I’ve tried for years… I can’t. I’m sorry, bro. I never wanted to do this to your family, especially after everything you guys have been through. You know that.”

  He shook his head, disappointed. “You know what really fucking kills me is that I didn’t know. How did I not know? I love Lily more than anything in this world. How did I not see it? Am I that fucking blind?”

  “I… don’t…” I sighed not knowing what to say.

  “I can’t look at you right now. I can’t even stand to fucking look at myself either. After all the years and everything you did to keep Alex and I apart… you were fucking around with my baby sister? You’re such a goddamn hypocrite.”

  “I love her,” I simply stated not knowing what else to say. “I’m so fucking sorry, Lucas. I don’t know what else I could say other than you’re right and I’m fucking sorry.”

  “Everyone knows, don’t they?” he asked out of nowhere.

  I faintly nodded.

  “Since the beginning?”

  “For the most part.”

  “My mom a
nd dad too?”

  “Your mom knew. She gave us her blessing on her final days. I’m sure your dad knows something, but I was going to talk to him next about it. I want to ask for Lily’s hand in marriage.”

  “Shit…” was all he could manage to say.

  “I told you. I’m not fucking around. She’s mine.”

  He took a deep breath, looking all around the beach and then back at me. “You hurt her, Jacob, you so much as make her cry one fucking time and I will bury you alive. You hear me? You will fucking die.”

  “I’ll bring the shovel.”

  “I don’t fucking like this. I’m not going to pretend like I do. I’m not saying that’s not going to change, but for right now I’ll accept it because what other choice do I have. We’re not okay.” He shoved his finger into my chest.

  I nodded again.

  He grabbed his surfboard and I followed him back up to his house. Lily was sitting on the couch with Bo in her arms, Alex standing in the kitchen making some breakfast. She took one look at me and then at Lucas.

  “I’ll get you some Ibuprofen, Jacob.” She kissed Lucas on the neck. “Feel better?”

  He shrugged and grabbed a beer from the fridge, throwing me one. I took it down in three swigs, walking into the living room. Lucas never took his eyes off me, burning a hole in my back. I knew he was watching Lily and I like a fucking hawk.

  “You okay?” she asked as I sat on the coffee table in front of her. I could tell she wanted to comment on my appearance but didn’t want to add any more fuel to the fire.

  “You hit harder.” Cracking a smile for her, trying to lighten the situation.

  She smiled, biting her lip.

  “Everything will be alright, sweet girl. I promise,” I murmured. “I’m going to meet with your dad. I’ll be back later.”

  She nodded. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too.” I kissed her forehead.

  And left.

  Jacob left and we all ate breakfast in silence. Lucas didn’t say a word to me, not that I expected him to. After breakfast, I put Bo down in his crib for a nap. I turned around to find Lucas standing in the doorway, watching me with a look in his eyes I had never seen before.

  “Lucas, you scared the shit out of me,” I said, grabbing my chest.

  “Are you happy?” he questioned. His arms were crossed over his chest with his back leaned against the wall.

  “I’ve never been this happy in my entire life,” I paused to let my words sink in. “I pursued him, Lucas. For years it was all me. He never wanted to disrespect you, our families, or me. For the longest time I didn’t understand his reasoning. A little part of me resented it. I felt bad that I didn’t feel that way and he did. When mom died everything changed for me. Even up until now I was terrified of you finding out. I can’t lose another family member, please don’t make me choose.” Tears formed in my eyes and he immediately came over, putting his arms around me.

  “Shhh… you’re not going to lose me. I promise.”

  I nodded into his shirt and he pulled away. “Lily, all I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy. You’re always going to be my baby sister. I may not understand you and Jacob, but as much as I hate it right now… I’ll respect it for you.”

  It wasn’t what I wanted to hear but I said, “Okay.”

  “Do you love him?” he questioned.

  “More than anything in this world.”

  “If he hurts you, I may have to kill him. You’ve been warned.”

  I laughed. “He won’t hurt me again.”

  “So he’s hurt you before?”

  “Lucas, I don’t want to talk about that. It’s in the past. He won’t hurt me again. I trust him. But I will say this, every time he walked away from me it was because of you. I won’t let him push me away again.”

  “I promised mom that I would take care of you, but you’ve always been able to take care of yourself. I need to remember that. I need to let you grow up.”

  “That’s probably a good idea.”

  He smiled. “I’ll always be here, Lily. I’m your big brother, you’re stuck with me.”

  “Good. I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

  He kissed my forehead and left. I knew he was going to talk to Alex, and I hoped it would go as smoothly as it had with me. Even though I knew he was hurt that she lied to him. Alex would find some way to make it up to him though.

  “You may get a sibling before you know it, Bo,” I giggled, shaking my head.

  It was late by the time Jacob came back from talking with my dad. At least this time he didn’t have more bruises. His lip was swollen with a cut down the side, his left eye had light bruising starting to form around it, and he had bruised ribs.

  I felt awful.

  “It looks worse than it is,” he stated as we lay together in the guest bedroom.

  “So, you were being honest about the whole letting him kick your ass thing, huh?”

  “Look what it’s done for his perspective.”

  “Hmm… not much.” I laughed, kissing the cut on his lip. “But at least he knows now. How was my dad?”

  “Your dad was not surprised in the least. Which makes me think your mom told him more than what we thought.”

  I wasn’t going to tell Lily that her dad wasn’t pleased with the fact that everything started when she was only fifteen. He yelled, a lot. I think he debated on hitting me himself. The only reason he didn’t was because he took one look at me and knew Lucas had already handled it for him. As soon as I took the ring from my pocket, he shut up fairly quickly. After he threatened me a few more times, he gave me his approval before I left. I didn’t tell Lily I went to see her mom’s grave to thank her for everything. I sat there for a bit also telling her how Lucas reacted and what my face looks like from it. Before I left, I told her that I would always take care of her little girl.

  No matter what.

  Lily laid down on my chest, and I hissed from the pain.

  “Shit!” She instantly sat up. I pulled her back down wanting to feel her.

  “I’m fine.”

  “I just hurt you. You’re not fine.”

  I thought about it for a second. “You know what… I’m really not fine. I’m actually really hurt. I’ve never hurt this bad in my life. I think I may be dying.” I grinned.

  “Oh yeah, big man? What can I do to save you?” She smirked right back.

  “I don’t know. I think this is serious. I may not make it through the night.”

  “Maybe I should check on my friend? You know, make sure he’s okay after all this. It’s important that he still loves me.”

  I nodded, placing my hands behind my head. “Whatever you think is right, baby.”

  She kissed every one of my bruises, working her way down to “her friend” as she called him. She placed me into her wet, hot mouth, sucking my cock like she had something to prove. I couldn’t take it anymore. I flipped her over and fucked her until she begged me to stop.

  I didn’t.

  It was Lily’s twenty-fifth birthday. She loved to take every opportunity possible to remind me that I would always be seven years older than her. We were having a party for her at Alex’s restaurant where she was currently their entertainment. Word got around fast about Lily’s talent. People from all over the world come in just to watch her perform. She’s been in the papers and on the news. She was called a hometown celebrity. It never fazed her though. All she wanted to do was play and sing. I opened my law firm a month after we moved and so far things were running smoothly. Our house was finally furnished. It took fucking forever. Lily was constantly changing things left and right… Alex wasn’t helping the situation either. Lucas’s company remodeled a few things for us.

  We were not as close as we used to be, but slowly we were getting back there. Lily didn’t pay him any mind and neither did Alex, who was now four months pregnant with a girl. Lily laughed her ass off for like ten minutes when we found out the sex. She said one word, “Karma.�
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  Dylan was working crazy hours doing God knows what. We barely saw him anymore. Every time I tried bringing it up to Lily, she blew me off. Changing the subject to something else, which I found odd. Austin moved back a few weeks after we did. No one knew what the fuck was going on with him and Briggs. I could tell some shit went down with them. Who knows when it would stop, if it ever would.

  “Phew… I need to sit down,” Alex breathed out, putting her hand on her belly.

  “Don’t let Lucas hear you. You’ll never leave the house again,” Lily responded. “You know what? I’m actually surprised he let you out tonight, Half-Pint.”

  “You think he could make me miss your birthday party? Hell no.” She continued to rub her baby bump.

  Lily laughed. I lugged her toward me, hugging her tiny frame into my chest to look down at her. “Have I told you how beautiful you look?”

  “Once or twice, but you’re thirty-one now so…” She winced. “Your memory must be going, old man,” she giggled.

  “You little shit.” I spanked her.

  “Hey, hey, hey what are your hands on?” Lucas chimed in, rubbing Alex’s bump.

  “What’s mine,” I replied not taking my eyes off Lily.

  “You’re lucky I don’t kick your ass, again.”

  “You would be lucky if I let you do it, again.”

  “Alright, boys, let’s remember it’s my birthday. This pissing contest ends now. We’re nice to each other today!” Lily sang out loud.

  “Bo, I need help with the cake. Come help me.” Alex pulled him with her.

  “Is this code for kitchen fu—”

  She put her hand over his mouth. “Oh my God!” She shook her head with wide eyes while Lily and I tried not to laugh.

  Dylan walked in as they were about to leave, making his way to the bar.

  “Fuck, man, what the hell happened to you?” I asked, taking in his bloody lip, bruised eye, and his knuckles all cut up. He looked like he had been in a fight.

  “Bad day at work,” he simply stated, grabbing a beer from the bar.

  “No shit,” was all I could reply.