It Is What it Is

by Ivory B.

  Suddenly his ringing cell phone brought him out of his deep thoughts. Los already knew who it was from the ringtone. He reached over snatching the phone up quickly to avoid waking Lucky. “Nice what’s good?” “What’s good is I just came from Mom Dukes crib and caught her and Aunt V scrapping on some WorldStar shit Bruh.” “What? Yo is you serious?” Los said rising from his back trying to ease from under Lucky without waking her. “Los listen that shit was crazy, Mom was beaten the breaks off V man. I broke that mess up and Mom was still tryna get at her. V wig ended up all cocked to the side like it was on its gangsta lean, Momz went savage on V had her leakin and everything.” “What?!” Los asked getting hyped and jumping out of bed when he heard blood was drawn. He knew his brother had the tendency to hype shit up in order to make things more entertaining but Nice sounded dead ass. “Where you at right now?” Los asked. “On my way back out to Momz crib.” “Man I’ma meet you out there, I’m on my way to check on her and find out what’s goin on.” “Say no more Bruh I’ll see you out there,” Nice responded before hanging up.

  Lucky stirred awake when she heard Los moving through their room swiftly as he was getting dressed. The loud familiar click clack sound of him releasing the safety off his gun made her open her eyes in time to see him tucking it in his waist band before he shoved his feet hastily into a pair of Timbs. “Carlos what’s going on? Where you going Pa?” Lucky asked with slight alarm as she sat up in bed. “Luck it’s nothing I’ll be right back,” he said before leaning in and hurriedly placing a kiss on her forehead. Lucky wasn’t buying whatever Los was trying to sale clearly something was going on.

  Lucky looked over at the clock on the nightstand nearly two hours later wondering when Los was going to come home? She’d been up since he left the house and she planned on staying that way until he made it back to her in one piece. At that exact moment Los was standing in the doorway of his mother’s spacious living room burning a hole through her with his cold amber eyes. He’d been at his mother’s house for over an hour and she’d refused to even acknowledge his presence. Nice had decided to take it in for the night figuring Cathy would talk when she was good and ready but Los refused to give up. Cathy looked over at the doorway noticing Los standing there with his arms crossed across his chest mean mugging her as if he were a disappointed parent expecting Cathy to answer to him about her behavior. “For real Mom we gon sit here and act like that mess with you and Aunt V ain’t just pop off?” Los asked with an indignant look on his face. Cathy looked over at her son ready to put him in his place he was so much like his father at times. “Carlos I don’t have to answer to you like I’m your damn child, as a matter of fact I think it’s time for you to go.” Carlos looked at his mother stunned. He couldn’t believe she was actually kicking him out the crib like Martin used to do Pam. “Ma you wildin; me and Nice couldn’t even look at each other too hard growing up and the rare times we ever came to blows you lost it, but here you fighting ya sister. You being a real hypocrite right now,” Los said with disappointment lacing his words. “Carlos! Who the hell is you talkin to like that? Boy I will bust you in yo gotdamn head for tal…” Cathy stopped mid-sentence placing her hand to her chest to calm herself. “Carlos please leave my house and leave me the hell alone,” Cathy said making sure she put emphasis on each word she spoke. Los snatched his keys from his pocket and headed towards the front door with quick angry strides. “You don’t have to get up I’ll lock it,” Los shot over his shoulder before slammimg the door shut without giving his mother her usual hug and kiss on the cheek.

  Cathy took a long exhale once she heard the door shut and lock. It felt as if she’d been literally holding in these emotions that came pouring out as soon as she was alone. She jumped up and walked over to the fireplace tossing her half empty wine glass into the fireplace causing it to momentarily roar as if it were angry. Cathy walked sluggishly back to the couch flopping down carelessly as the alcohol in her system began to take ahold of her. Before she knew it her eyelids began to get heavy and then it was lights out.

  Cathy’s heart raced fast and hard enough to go into cardiac arrest on the spot as she listened to Candace and Carlos have a heated argument standing in the backyard. She’d just returned home from class early not expecting to see her sister’s car in her driveway. Cathy entered the house and called out her sister’s name getting no response. It wasn’t until she followed the muffled voices coming from the kitchen that she realized both her sister and Carlos were on the back patio engaged in a heated argument. She moved fast towards the sliding glass French doors that lead outside to break the argument up not knowing exactly why her sister and husband would be arguing in the first place.

  “What the fuck are you crazy? You not thinkin straight Candy you gotta get rid of that.” Carlos stated in a demanding and slightly panicked tone. “No I’m not getting rid of anything, I’m keeping my baby and you can’t make me kill my baby, I won’t do it,” Candy screamed damn near hysterically. “What? You having what?! Oh fuck,” Carlos stressed running both hands down his face pacing back and forth like a caged animal. “You really not thinkin, you being selfish what about ya sister? Ha? What about my wife? Do you know or care about what this shit will do to her? I mean…what that baby will be Carlito’s brother, sister, cousin? Now do you hear how twisted that shit sounds? It sounds crazy because it is crazy! Now Candace get ya mufuckin mind right you not having that baby.” Carlos demanded his dark eyes looking unpredictable and wild. Candace half thought about what a wild animal would do when you had it cornered, she was well aware of what Showtime was capable of but she wasn’t backing down from what she thought was right. Yes this was a fucked up situation but she wasn’t killing what she felt was God’s will or else he wouldn’t have made it that she got pregnant from that one brief time they shared. Well that’s how her young mind justified it. Candace looked into the same dark eyes that used to always have her mesmerized. The same eyes she would daydream and fantasize about but for some reason those eyes weren’t the same. She’d always had a crush on him although she knew it wasn’t right.

  Candace could remember both her and Cathy peeking out of the bedroom window they shared pulling back the blinds to watch the normal everyday in the hood activity. This was as close as they could get since their grandmother was so strict on them. Usually it was to school and back, do homework and chores, wake up and do it all over again. So when it was time to go to bed and the lights went out in the bedroom Cathy and Candace found themselves perched up in their bedroom window enthralled by their neighborhood. One of the things they loved to see come and hated to see leave was the man better known as Showtime. It was obvious he was the man; he’d come hang out in front of their building to collect money from his workers and to check one of his booming operations he ran out of their neighbors Marie’s apartment. When Cathy started secretly messing around with Showtime Candace childhood crush should’ve ended there but unfortunately it somehow got stronger. Maybe it was the whole phenomenon of wanting something that was forbidden or unattainable for Candace. But she’d never imagined that infatuation with her sister’s husband going as far as it did.

  Candace decided to take her crush on her Sister’s husband to the next level one fateful night after a marathon card game. Carlos and Cathy’s house was jumping as they hosted a card party with some off their closest friends and family in attendance Everyone had been drinking pretty heavily that night and some even partaking in a little weed while playing cards. Liquor had been flowing along with an abundance of food, while oldie but goodies played loudly throughout the house by way of the custom stereo system. By the wee hours of the morning the party had finally started to die down with everyone leaving to go home or either going to their respective rooms to sleep. Candace was over that weekend as she found herself on many weekends. Cathy had extended an open invitation to her sister after their grandmother passed away leaving Candy on her own in her own apartment. Cathy wanted to stay close with her younger sister to keep a w
atchful eye on her since she was basically out in the world on her own now. Plus Candace was great with the boys and Cathy loved the relationship Carlos had with his Ant.

  Candace found herself in the kitchen cleaning up the aftermath of the card party so that her sister wouldn’t have to in the morning. Cathy had retired to bed hours ago; she was always a lightweight when it came to drinking so after two beers she’d called it a night. Chad and V had left a little while ago leaving Carlos and his buddy Tim behind. The men played one more game before Tim called it a night as well. While Carlos was outside bidding his buddy farewell Candace couldn’t help but think about how good he looked that night with a pair of black slacks on and a wife beater. His wife beater clung to his muscular chest while showing off his nice muscular arms. She couldn’t help but feel green with envy as she watched her sister sit on his lap while he sang along to Al Green’s Love and Happiness.

  Candace slipped out of her night pants leaving her panties wedged inside of them so the only thing she had on was a t-shirt that barely covered her voluptuous ass cheeks. She could hear Showtime close the front door and walk down the hallway to the bathroom. She didn’t know what came over her maybe it was the alcohol or the weed V had snuck and let her smoke in back of the house that night out of Cathy’s sight but she thought it was now or never. Candy grabbed a half empty can of Budweiser she was about to dump down the drain and guzzled it to give her a little more liquid courage. The hallway was dark as well as the bathroom. Candace stood at the bathroom door for a fleeting moment having second thoughts about what she was about to do. She shook her fears off and slipped right into the halfway opened bathroom door undetected. Carlos was in his shake movement about to slip his Cobra back into his pants when Candy wrapped her arms around his back and placed her hands on his wood. She stroked his manhood, fascinated as it grew in girth and length in the palm of her hands. Carlos head rolled back into his shoulders as a moan of satisfaction slipped from his lips. She got faster with her strokes using the pre-cum that seeped from his lower head as lubricant. Candy pressed her soft breasts to his back and moaned along with him. Suddenly he turned around fast grabbing her with urgency as he positioned her up against the bathroom vanity. He hiked one of her legs on top of the vanity right before sliding inside of her essence. Candace braced herself and took a deep breath as Carlos plowed his way inside of her. She’d had a few but never had she felt anything like this. She felt his large powerful hand grip her hip while he placed his other hand against the mirror in front of them. Carlos slid in and out of her each time his large nut sack hit her plump cheeks with a loud slap. She could hear his heavy labored breathing in her ear as he leaned in close and kissed her neck. Candace gasped when he pressed up against her and began to rotate his hips in a circular motion. She belted out a satisfying moan as her womanhood gushed for him. “Oh, yeah that’s it right there baby.” Carlos moaned through heavy breathing. He stood up on his tippy toes plowing upwards into her slippery walls attempting to crawl up in her wetness. His strokes became faster and harder sending Candace flying into the faucet and accidently turning on the water. Suddenly she was pulled from the sink onto her feet. “Bend over baby grab them ankles you how I like it.” Showtime said in a sexy demand. Candace did as she was told and threw her ass back to meet his pumps. “Ohh!” Candace moaned in satisfaction being mindful of anyone hearing them although she didn’t think anyone would over the stereo. He glided in slow, in and out stimulating her each time with his dick filling up every inch of her. Candace whimpered and shook right before letting her creamy insides rain down on him. Carlos picked up his speed causing Candace to let her ankle go and reach for the wall to brace herself as Carlos went deeper and faster. She felt his dick jerk inside of her and his large hands grip her hips tighter right before he released his seeds deep inside her womb. “Oh my god Cat, my baby Cat I love you,” Carlos professed drunkenly through huffs. Candace stood there mortified her heart literally fell to her toes. She pushed him off of her; she could hear him stumble a little bit on his feet trying desperately to break his fall since he still had his pants around his ankles. Candace went to the light switch on the wall and turned it on. “I’m not your gotdamn wife,” she snarled in a loud whisper. Carlos blinked rapidly as if he were trying to get his eyes adjusted to the light and the more he blinked it seemed as if he were trying to change the image that stood before him. His wife’s baby sister standing there looking freshly fucked, broken hearted with his babies streaming down her inner thighs. Oh fuck! Oh no! Carlos pulled up his pants swiftly and headed towards the bathroom door. Candace tried to grab at his forearm to say something but he plowed right through her heading straight to one of the guest bedrooms to try and wash away his sins. He would soon find out that no matter how much he scrubbed himself that morning he could never wash himself of the life he had just created.

  That was two months ago and now Showtime stood face to face with the one person he’d been avoiding successfully since it all went down. Candace knew he was there alone with the boys because Cathy had class that evening, Cathy wasn’t the typical drug kingpin’s wife she actually wanted to go to college and establish a career of her own. Candace looked at him with vulnerable and needy eyes as he glowered back at her with genuine regret. “Why have you been ignoring me? We need to talk about what hap…” Candace didn’t even get a chance to finish her sentence before he grabbed her firmly by the forearm and dragged her onto the back deck. “My boys are in the fuckin house what is wrong with you?” Showtime sneered thinking of Nice and Carlos who were in the living room watching television. He looked nervously through the glass French doors for reassurance that no one was there. “Why haven’t you been answering my calls?” “Cause we don’t have shit to talk about, what happened between us was a mistake that won’t ever, ever happen again. Do you understand me?” Showtime asked firmly. Candace stood there with glossy eyes as if she were on the verge of tears. “I’m pregnant,” she blurted out. “What?! You what? Nah, nah, nah you gon get rid of that shit!” He screamed in a damn near panicked tone. “No I’m not this is my baby and yours too and no one’s gonna make me kill it. I don’t believe in abortions.” Carlos started pacing back and forth like a caged wild animal pinning her with an angry glare. This bitch playin games, she gon fuck around and come up missin, I know it’s gonna hurt Cat if something happens to her sister but it will hurt her more if that baby really is mine. It’s probably not even mine, she might be bluffing but damn I can’t take the risk of her having it and it really being mine. She gotta get rid of it or else Cat gone leave me for sure, I can’t have that, I love my wife. Cat don’t deserve this she been good to me, too good fuck! Money! Yeah money will make this problem go away I know it will. “You not thinkin, you being selfish. What about your sister? Ha? What about my wife? Do you know or care about what this shit will do to her? I mean…what that baby will be Carlito’s brother, sister, cousin? Do you hear how twisted and crazy that shit sounds? It sounds crazy because it is crazy! Now Candace get ya mufuckin mind right you not having that baby.” Carlos demanded his dark eyes looking unpredictable and wild. He moved in closer to Candace causing her to step backwards in fear of what he might do to her and the baby growing inside of her. “If you tryna shake a nigga down, okay you got it. I’ll pay you whateva you want. I won’t even write no check we can go straight to the bank just get rid of that before ya sister finds ou…” “You dirty Muthafucka!” Cat screamed bursting through the backdoor with a butcher knife coming towards both Carlos and Candace. Cathy had a knife held high over her head running towards them like a killer out of a slasher film. Tears clouded Cathy’s vision as her hands shook violently. She was so angry and hurt she was having trouble breathing. It literally felt as if she were dying slowly inside as her chest and throat closed up on her. A low sob escaped Cathy’s lips as she wielded the biggest butcher knife she could find in the kitchen aiming at the source of her pain, her husband. Without thinking about the most important person in her life which was
her son or the consequences she swung the knife with precision aiming straight for her husband’s throat. Carlos raised his arm in the nick of time ducking his head behind one arm while quickly moving to subdue her with his other arm. She heard him grunt in pain as the knife sliced through his shirt like a sharp pair of scissors to a piece of paper. Cathy swung the knife again as Carlos lunged for it not caring that he was injuring his fingers by grabbing at the knife blade with his bare hands. Right now he was in a fight for his life; his adrenaline was pumping so fast he didn’t feel a thing. Cathy brought the knife down aiming for his heart only managing to deliver a nasty flesh wound to his chest since he pulled back while at the same time grabbing ahold of her small wrist. Carlos looked into his wife’s eyes and honestly didn’t recognize her, her eyes were crazed and past the point of anger. Although he was two sizes bigger than his petite wife, he honestly felt in fear for his life. She’d already went for his throat and chest so it was clear she wasn’t playing games. Tears poured down Cathy’s face as Carlos overpowered her; she came to the realization that he wouldn’t feel physically what she was feeling emotionally by having that butcher knife lodged deep into his heart. That’s exactly how Cathy felt right now, like she’d been stabbed in her back right through her heart by him. Candace screamed in fright throwing her hands to her mouth; for a moment she thought this had to be some type of bad dream until she saw the crimson colored droplets of blood hitting the floor, she knew then that this was all too real. “Oh my god! Oh my god Cat you stabbed him.” “Yes I did and bitch you next!” Cathy threatened through loud pants, tears and wounded eyes. Candace didn’t respond instead she stood there cowering in the corner with tears running down her face. “Fuck him! You’re my sister! My sister! How could you do that to me? I took care of you always looked out for you like you were my own!” Carlos knew he had to defuse this situation as he struggled with his wife for possession of the knife. Cathy held onto the handle of the large knife with a vice grip. He didn’t want to fuck around and get flatlined nor did he want her to accidently get hurt in the process of them struggling. Carlos squeezed down on her hand hard enough to break bones causing her to finally let go of the knife. It dropped to the floor with a thud and he hurriedly snatched it up before bursting through the French doors from the patio back into the house. Cathy was hot in pursuit running in the house behind him. Carlos looked down at his arm and noticed for the first time he was bleeding profusely. He proceeded to rip open his shirt to get a better look at his wound. She’d cut him all the way down to the white meat past the layers of fat under the skin. The best way to describe how his arm looked to him was a fried hot dog when it burst down the middle. “Oh shit!” Carlos spat in somewhat disbelief as he looked down at his open arm. The cut had narrowly missed his vein. He ran straight to the counter and damn near tore the cap off the Vodka bottle before taking it to the head. Carlos felt as if he needed that to prevent himself from passing the hell out. He then took the bottle and poured it over his open wound to prevent infection. “Fuuucck!” He screamed out in pain, then he wrapped and tied his torn shirt around his arm to try and minimize blood loss. Suddenly he saw Cathy coming towards him fast from his peripheral view. She reached for the liquor bottle he put down and he knew what was coming next. “Cat! Cat gotdammit calm down!” Showtime demanded with fright in his eyes. She’d never seen her husband afraid; no not big bad Showtime but there was a first for everything. Cathy had a firm grip on the neck of the bottle and she had intentions on busting him in his head with the bottle then shoving it in his chest. He knew he had to mollify Cathy quickly and he knew exactly what to do to bring his wife out of this crazed space she was in right now. Showtime raised his arm to try and shield himself from the bottle while backing away.