by Bella Emy
“Hey, Pops.” I walk out onto the patio after closing the screen door behind me.
Maverick rises. “Want to sit here?” He asks, offering me his seat next to Pops.
I chuckle. “Nah, it’s cool, bro. I’ll sit right here.” I pull out the chair on the side and take a seat.
“Want a beer?” Maverick asks. He’s being awfully polite on this fine afternoon. Usually Maverick is all about himself. Maybe he’s happy to see me. Or maybe he’s just growing up. Either way, it’s good that he’s not chasing around a skirt today.
I shake my head, dismissing the offer with a hand. “I’m good, thanks, man.”
He nods twice. “Cool, cool.”
Mason, off to the left, laughs. “Dude, what is with you?” he asks Maverick. Guess he’s noticing it, too.
“What?” Maverick answers, looking like he doesn’t have a clue. Knowing him, he probably doesn’t.
Mason shakes his head. “You’re acting weird, doofus.”
“Don’t mind them,” my father says to me.
“I don’t pay it no mind.”
“Hey!” Mason says.
I hold out my hands in defense. “I’m just saying, bro. You guys do you. I’m just going to sit out here and chill until dinner’s ready. Which reminds me why I came out here in the first place. Mom wants you guys to wash up for dinner. It’s almost ready.”
I don’t have to repeat that twice. As soon as my brothers hear dinner is about ready, they rise to their feet and head for the screen door.
“Perfect, I’m starving,” Pops says. Seeing that he has an appetite is a great sign of his recovery. “Make sure you help your mother set the table, you two,” he says to my brother right before they disappear inside.
They groan but don’t protest.
“Mom wanted me to do that,” I confess.
My father smiles widely at me. “Shhh. They don’t need to know that.” He winks. “As long as one of you three does it, it’s fine and Mom will be happy.”
I chuckle. “Should we get on inside, too?”
Pops thinks for a moment before saying, “How long did your mother say till dinner?”
“Fifteen.”
He nods. “Okay, so that’s really like twenty-five.”
The two of us laugh.
He picks up his glass of iced cold water from the table and takes a sip. “So, how’s things going, Son?”
I sit back in my chair. I wonder if he means how work is going and if I’m behaving and controlling my temper. He’s probably worried that I’ll lose it again one day and get in trouble. I need to reassure him. “Pretty good, can’t complain. Work is great, too. All good, Pops.”
He eyes me dubiously. “That’s great. It’s really good to hear, but that’s not what I’m referring to, Maddox.”
It’s not? Shit, then what the hell does he want to know?
I look at him straight in the eye. “I’m not sure I follow, Pops.”
He shakes his head, a wicked smile pulls across his lips. “The girl, Maddox. The one you’ve had your heart set on since you were kids.”
I look at him with a confused expression. What the fuck? How the hell does he even know something is going on with her? How does he even know I have—and have had—feelings for her?
Pops swats his hand in my direction, hitting the air. “Oh, stop. You don’t honestly think for one second that your mother and I were blind to your lovesick heart and puppy dog eyes for this girl, do you?”
I don’t say a word and just swallow hard, not knowing how the hell to respond.
He shakes his head again. “Jesus Christ, Maddox. We used to be your age once, too, you know? We were also kids in love a long time ago as well. You’re not the first.”
“P-Pops, I know, but…”
“Oh, you know, you shmow. You kids are all the same.” He looks away out into the backyard and then brings his gaze back to me. “Even though she’s not talking to you right now, don’t give up on her. Don’t let her go, Maddox. Don’t leave her right now when she needs you.”
Oh my God, everyone is telling me the same thing. But how the hell does he know this? Fine, maybe he knows about everything from when we were younger. I guess living at home and always hanging out together was a dead giveaway. But this, and now? How could he know?
And then, as I turn my head toward the sliding screen door, I see Mason staring at us, smiling.
Ah, Mason. That’s how Pops knows. Of course, he’s listening and of course, he’s the one who told him.
I smirk at him and shake my head from side to side. He just mouths the words, “I’m sorry, Mad,” and then flips around and disappears into the next room.
I turn back to my father just in time to hear him say, “Everyone I’ve spoken to about this keeps telling me the same thing.”
“Because it’s the truth, Maddox. Think about it. Really think about it.”
I nod. Yeah, there’s got to be some truth in it if they’re all singing the same song. Mason’s right. Grant’s right. And Pops is right.
Pops places a hand on my arm. He lets out a deep breath and then says, “Something similar happened with your mother way back when. If I had listened to my head and not my heart, you and your brothers would not be here today. I wouldn’t have had my love right by my side through all these years, and that’s a life I could never imagine. Don’t go down that route, Maddox. Don’t lose this girl. Be there for her still and you’ll see everything will work out fine.”
As he says those words, my mother comes out onto the patio with a wide opened smile and places her hands on her hips. “Aren’t you guys hungry today?”
I chuckle to myself. I wonder if the smile on her face is an indication that she heard what we were talking about. Maybe she did, and it’s bringing her back some memories. Who knows.
Pops smiles at her adoringly. After all these years, they’re still in love. That’s where I want to find myself forty years from now. With my love, right by my side.
With Adelyn. The realization hits me so hard, like a bolt of lightning shocking my soul.
“Yes, dear. We’re coming in now.” Pops rises from his chair and I do the same.
“Good,” Mom says and turns around, heading on inside first.
Pops places a hand on my shoulder, willing me to turn and face him. “Remember my words, Son.”
I nod.
He winks and says, “After dinner, I think you know exactly what you need to do.”
I do. But this can’t wait till after dinner. This has to be now.
Pulling away, I head toward the white gate that leads out to the front of the house. I spin around before pulling it open and say, “Pops, tell Mom I’m sorry, but I have to go! I’ll make it up to her!”
He smiles at me with a knowing look, but still he asks me just the same. “Where are you going, Son?”
“I’m taking your advice, Pops,” I say, pulling open the gate. “I’m going to get my love!”
Chapter Thirty-Five
I reach her block in a surprising three point five seconds… or at least that’s what the rush of the drive over felt like to me. It’s a relief when I notice her car parked out in front of her place. At least this time I know she’s here. After so long, I’m finally going to be seeing Adelyn.
The entire ride over, all I could think about was her sweet face and the echoing of Grant, Mason, and Pops’ voices.
“… don’t give up on her. Don’t let her go, Maddox. Don’t leave her right now when she needs you.”
“Keep showing her you’re there for her. She thought you weren’t an option anymore. She thought whatever she had with you was over. Now that things have changed, I’m sure she’s having a hard time dealing with everything… Don’t let her go through this alone. Be there for her. Keep calling her, keep going to see her.”
“Leaving her would be the worst thing you could do for her, Mad. Letting her suffer through her emotions all on her own is the worst possible thing… She needs you more t
han you will ever know, Maddox.”
I pull into the first parking spot I see about three houses up from her place and jump out of my car. I almost forget to lock my doors in the hurry, but I manage to somehow find the button on the key fob and race to the front of her building.
“Adelyn!” I call before even reaching her door. I’m sure she can’t hear me from the second floor of her apartment, but dammit if I don’t try.
Once I reach the front entrance of the building, I pull out the keys and unlock the heavy door. I run up a flight of stairs in record time and stop when I’m standing in front of her apartment door.
I may have just let myself into the building, but I won’t just barge right on into her apartment. I suck in a deep breath and knock three times.
No response.
She’s here. I know she’s here. I saw her car parked right out front.
Unless someone came to pick her up. The same someone who she’s been seeing after sleeping with me.
I shake my head. What the hell am I saying? I don’t believe that for one second. I know that’s not the reason Adelyn’s been distant.
I try again, ringing the doorbell.
Still no answer.
I resolve to knocking one last time and then saying, “Come on, Adelyn, open the door.”
After a moment, I hear her voice. “G-Go away, I’m not home.” She sucks in a sniffle.
Dammit, she’s been crying. What the hell?
“Come on, Ad. It’s me, Maddox. You can talk to me.” At least, I hope she still feels she can.
“I said I’m not here. Go away.”
I roll my eyes. “Okay, fine. I’m coming in.” I insert the key into the lock and let myself in. The place is dark, so I reach over and turn on the lamp sitting on the end table to the right of the door. Then I see her but I almost don’t recognize her, sitting in the same spot as she had been in, on the day I raced over from work when I found her crying to herself. Once again, she’s cuddled up against the corner of the floor, knees up to her chest. Once again, she looks a damn mess.
Her mascara is smeared down the sides of her cheeks. She hasn’t just been crying. She’s been sobbing, bawling. She’s broken once again.
I frown. Everything we did brought her back to square one, and it’s all my fault. She’s feeling this way because I touched her like she begged me to. She’s feeling like this because I allowed myself to have a taste of her, and then I couldn’t turn back around and stop myself.
This is all my fault.
“Adelyn,” I whisper, sauntering over to her. I’m disappointed as hell with myself.
She buries her face into her knees, covering her face. “Go away, Maddox. I don’t want to see you.”
I knew it. She’s mad at me. She hates me. She doesn’t want me around. That’s why she’s been keeping her distance. That’s why she pulled away. Not because she needed time. Not because she didn’t know how to process her feelings. But because I did what I did, and now she can’t stand me.
I knew I should have never gone ahead with it. I knew I should have never placed my hands all over her soft skin, devouring every inch of her body.
Because of it, I’ve lost my best friend. And because of it, she never wants to see me again.
And then, once again, the voices of Grant, Mason, and my father come ringing back in the front of my mind.
“Don’t give up… don’t let her go… don’t abandon her.”
I shut my eyes tightly as I finally reach her and kneel to be at her level. “No.”
She looks up at me through her wet lashes with a confused expression on her face. “What?”
I shake my head and sit on my ass beside her. “I said no. I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving your side, Adelyn, until you talk to me. I’m not leaving until you can look me straight in the eyes and tell me with all honesty that you indeed want me to leave.”
“Fine,” she answers after contemplating my words for a few moments. She turns her face and stares at me directly in the eyes. “I want you,” she turns her gaze to the ground and then says, “to leave.”
I chuckle softly. “You don’t mean that. You looked away.”
She shrugs and then looks back up at me. “I almost did.” She’s fucking beautiful and I just wish I could take her pain away. I hate to see her like this all over again. This time it’s because of me, though.
I smirk. “Almost doesn’t count.”
She rolls her eyes, letting out a deep breath and then wiping her tears with the back of her hand. “I hate this.”
I take that as her invitation to let me in. “You finally ready to talk to me? ‘Cause I mean, I’ve got nowhere else to be, I can stay here all night until you’re ready to talk.”
She scoffs and pushes back against the wall. “Why are you doing this, Mad? Why are you like this? Why won’t you just go and let me rot alone? Let me be by myself to figure shit out, okay?”
I shake my head. “I can’t do that, Adelyn.”
She rolls her eyes again. “And why the fuck not? Why can’t you just—”
“Because the last time I left you, you said it was one of the worst days of your life, and I refuse to do that to you again, Adelyn. I won’t.”
I swallow thickly and then confess the truth I’ve been holding deep inside of me for years. “I love you.”
She stares at me speechless for a good minute, as if she never knew how I felt about her. Maybe she didn’t. But dammit, she knows now.
“I love you, Adelyn. I’ve always loved you,” I repeat.
She shakes her head. “I’m a monster, Mad. How can you love a monster?”
A monster? Her words confuse me.
I move to sit in front of her and place my hands on the sides of her arms to make sure she hears me out. “You’re not a monster, Ad.” I search her eyes to make sense of her words but in them I can see that she really feels this way. “Why are you saying that? Stop it.” I reach over, pushing the hair out of her eyes. “You’re the sweetest person I know.”
She pushes me away. “No, I’m not, Maddox. I’m a fucking monster. How could I not feel anything about everything?”
I furrow my brows. “Anything about everything? What’s everything? Can you elaborate? I’m not sure I understand.”
She sucks in a deep breath. “How could I not feel anything like bad or guilty, about everything, like all you made me feel?”
Ah, there it is. I allow her to continue before interrupting.
She places her elbow on her lap and then lays her head on it. “I mean, we slept together, and I enjoyed it. Fuck, did I enjoy it.” Her eyes light up, and I’m guessing it’s because the moments of the night we spent together come flashing back in her mind. I want to chuckle at her words, but I don’t.
Adelyn searches my face, but all I do is nod and let her continue speaking.
“I didn’t feel bad about it. I didn’t even feel guilty. And I still don’t. It’s been weeks, and I still don’t feel bad about it. I’m a monster.” Now she places her head in both of her hands.
I reach out, touching her arm. “Hey, there’s no reason to feel bad, Adelyn.”
She slowly looks up at me. Softly, she says, “Yes, there is. I was about to get married… but what did I do? Instead of continuing to mourn Rick’s death, I celebrated it by sleeping with you.”
Well, that’s a whole new way of putting it.
I shake my head. “It wasn’t celebrating…”
She bites her bottom lip for a second, and fuck if that doesn’t bring reminders to my mind. But now’s not the time.
She shrugs. “It felt like a celebration with how good it felt.”
It sure as hell felt good, but it was the one thing that made sense. After all those months of pain and suffering she was due for one night of feeling good, really good, unlike any other way I had made her feel before.
I know I need to remind her now. “Adelyn, you were hurting so much. You needed a relief, a break. You needed to forget th
e pain, just for a little bit. Don’t punish yourself for wanting to be happy again.”
She nods. “I know that. I’ve tried to remind myself of that every single day since we made love.” She pauses for a second and then says, “Don’t you see, Maddox? I slept with my dead fiancé’s best friend… I slept with my best friend. How am I not feeling bad about any of this? How did I enjoy all those feelings you gave me deep inside every time I think about how you made me feel that night, how you make me feel every single day… how you’ve made me feel every single day since the first moment I laid eyes on you.”
Since the first moment she laid eyes on me?
Tears roll down her cheeks once more, but as her words leave her lips, I know I absolutely cannot let her get away. I know I can’t walk out of here tonight without claiming what I’ve always wanted for as long as I’ve known Adelyn Pierce.
I place a finger gently under her chin, willing her to look into my eyes. “Adelyn, do I make you happy? When you’re with me, are you happy?”
She shrugs and lets out a soft giggle through the tears. “More than anything.”
“More than anything,” I repeat, breaking into a smile.
She bites her bottom lip once more. “I… I love you, Maddox. I always have.”
I nod. “Then let’s not let this get away from us.”
She furrows her brows. “What do you mean?”
“This,” I say, leaning in and smashing my lips into hers. She doesn’t even try to fight or hold back. Instead, she gives in and meets my kiss with her own.
Our lips part, and our tongues find their way back to one another. My arms embrace her and she leans into me, giving me everything she’s got with just this one kiss.
When we finally pull away, slowly parting, our foreheads stay against one another as we smile and allow ourselves to catch our breaths.
“I love you, Adelyn Pierce, and there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to make you happy.”
She giggles, the tears finally dried and gone. “I love you, too, Maddox Martinelli… so damn much.”
I chuckle, grabbing her and bringing her into my lap, right on the floor of her living room. I hold her tightly, enjoying the feel of her back in my arms. The familiar scent of her cinnamon shampoo comes wafting back into my nostrils. Damn, I missed her.
