Perfect Paige

by Ines Saint

  Charlene’s face fell a moment, because the insult hadn’t found its mark, before saying, “Well, there’s always someone, right?”

  Alex left, and Paige went to the kitchen, to sift through everything she wanted to say and choose a good comeback while she put some coffee on. Nothing good enough came to mind.

  “I thought your, er, neighbor, was late for work,” Charlene said.

  “What do you mean?”

  “The door across the hall just opened and shut.”

  Paige could only stare a moment, wondering if the woman was so filled with negativity and bad feelings that it somehow heightened her senses. Like how radiation had given Spider-Man his Spidey senses.

  And why did she care what this woman said or thought about her? No one liked her. No one ever really believed her mean-spirited gossip. No one. But they all pretended to. All because her husband, who was actually a very positive and optimistic person, was a top dog at a leading manufacturing company. “I have no idea what my neighbors are up to,” she replied. “I have better things to do than spy and look for dirt.”

  Charlene ignored her jab, and grabbed Paige’s hand as if they were confidants. “Come on, you can tell me. You were both flushed when you opened the door.”

  “I had just carried groceries up eighteen steps. I have no idea why he was flushed, though.” Paige would never figure out why her brain didn’t stop her from saying what she said next. She knew why the thought occurred to her: Charlene’s competitive streak was predictable. Anything set it off. But she’d never understand why nothing stopped her from actually spitting out her mischievous words. “I think maybe he has a crush on me.”

  The smirk fell, before being quickly replaced by the fake smile and a shrug. “Did you see the way he looked from me to you and back again when I walked in? I think we both know what he was thinking.” Charlene laughed.

  Paige forgot about making coffee for the spiteful woman, and instead walked over to open the door. “He was probably thinking we both look ridiculous in our identical chignons,” she said, before pulling hers out of its confines and running her hands through it. “I hate to be rude, but I have to put my groceries away and hop in for a quick shower. I have a drug test today.”

  “A drug test?” Charlene repeated, walking out.

  Paige knew she was giving her all sorts of juicy things to repeat. She also knew that many people who couldn’t stand Charlene would listen all too happily to her exaggerations, and then spread them about. Paige had never been like that, and she knew some others weren’t, either. But for the first time, she regretted the fact that the good apples didn’t just shun the bad apples, and maybe teach them a lesson in the process.

  The power of being the queen bee of that circle hadn’t been based on who she was on the inside, it had been based on what everyone thought she had on the outside. Sure, she was well-liked, but Charlene wasn’t and still she was just as respected.

  The power she was feeling right then felt so much better. It was based on real pride. “Yes,” she said excitedly. “I’m going to be working as a nurse at a rehabilitation clinic.”

  “A rehab clinic?” It was obvious Charlene didn’t know how to feel. The things Paige was saying were supposed to be no-no’s in their world, and yet Paige was stronger and more confident than ever, while all that was holding Charlene up was spite. The viper smile came out. Her only weapon. “All right, I’ll let you go, then. You’re clearly too busy for social chats.”

  “I am. I’m rediscovering real life.”

  Charlene shrugged delicately and left. Moments later, Alex walked out of his apartment. “Is she gone?”

  “I think so. But snakes slither. They can sneak up on you unnoticed.”

  He smiled and stepped closer. “Be careful you don’t say anything you’ll regret. You know she’ll hear it.”

  Paige studied him, trying to come to terms with her reaction to him. She’d been lying to herself for too long, and she just didn’t have it in her anymore. It took too much energy, and there was now an odd relief with simply acknowledging what was in front of her. The way he’d looked when he’d told her he’d seen the very real effects of white-collar crimes had resonated with her for some reason. There was more to both of them, and now they both knew it.

  It was obvious neither of them was happy about it. It was like she didn’t even know which way was up anymore. What did lust have to do with deeper truths, anyway? It was supposed to be a purely physical thing.

  Except she knew it wasn’t. Glenn hadn’t wanted her in well over a year. It had made her feel undesirable and, as hard as it was to admit it, pathetic over how hard she’d tried to win back his desire. It had been humiliating, and it had killed her own desire for him. It had made her tired of trying so hard to do the right thing . . . only to be wrong about what the right thing was.

  Charlene McBride was not a nice person. What the right thing was didn’t even matter to her. She’d come to gloat and criticize. To kick Paige when she was already down. It felt good to have denied her the satisfaction.

  Paige shrugged. “She’s outside. But I haven’t heard her car door close. She’s probably group-texting her brains out.”

  “Right. I’m sorry. Again.”

  She cleared her throat. “What, exactly, are you sorry about this time?”

  He was staring at her so intently, it was making her stomach do acrobatics it hadn’t done in years. “Everything.”

  “Can you see Charlene?” she asked, to make him look away.

  He slid his glance toward the three windows in front of the stairs. “Yes.”

  “Can she see us?”

  “She’s leaning on her car door and alternately looking down at the phone, and then up at us.”

  “Would she be able to record anything?”

  “No. Not from down there. The reflection from the windows wouldn’t allow it.”

  “Then come closer. Let me fix your tie.” The investigation, Alex, and unhealthy ties to her old life were standing between her and the road to newfound peace.

  He took a tentative step. “Why?”

  “It’s domestic. It’ll make Glenn wonder. And she’ll tell him. I guarantee it.”

  He took another step, and he was right in front of her. She got on her tiptoes and began fixing his tie. The pulse on his neck was beating, and it made her own blood heat up again. “What about your reputation?”

  “I’m feeling more sane now that I denied her the power to hurt me. I should’ve remembered that I never believe what Charlene says. It’ll do her good to actually be saying the truth and realize no one believes her.” She finished. “Is she looking up here?”

  Alex shifted a bit and slid his eyes down. He grinned. “More like gaping up.”

  She grinned, too. “Pretend you’re whispering in my ear.”

  He leaned in. “Like this?” His breath was close to her ear. It sent heat to parts of her body that had been cold for ages, and made her blood pump too quickly to keep her thoughts steady. She hadn’t expected that.

  “Yes. Just like that,” she whispered back.

  “How crazy do you want to make me—er, him? Glenn?”

  As if she wasn’t breathless enough, she nearly laughed, but swallowed it when it came out more like a pant. “I—I don’t know. I just need to be done with all this.” All of it. The hold pattern her life was in, the strange, totally inappropriate feelings toward the man in front of her, the associated confusion and guilt over everything.

  He leaned in then, and brushed the tip of his nose against her cheek. So simple, yet it made the little hairs on her arms stand on end. “Relax. I won’t take advantage of you. I promise,” he whispered right inside her ear, sending little shock waves everywhere.

  “Aha.”

  “She dropped her phone.” He chuckled. “Is it okay if I hold you?”

  “Aha.”

  He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. His body was hard and hot, and his breath was now teasing t
he little nerve endings on her mouth. There was no way he wouldn’t notice how fast and shallow her breathing had become.

  It’s a show. We’re putting on a show. Her hands crept up around his neck, and she buried her face in his neck, to keep him close enough to fool Charlene, and at the same time get his lips the hell away from her mouth.

  Musky, woodsy, and citrusy scents of freshly showered and shaved male swirled around her. He moved his head and his warm breath on the sensitive skin of her neck threatened her sanity. Another super-agent power they probably taught over at Quantico. No one could fake-kiss that well without lessons on technique. Make Your Partner Crazy 101. He must’ve aced the class.

  He stopped moving then, his breaths became labored, and he whispered an epithet that for some unholy reason aroused her more than any endearment ever had. He was as affected by it as she was.

  * * *

  Alex fought to maintain control. To be aware of his surroundings. But Paige was making him forget the world. Her hands were around his neck, and her heart hammered against his chest, as if she was as attracted to him as he was to her.

  “That’s enough, you two!” a voice called up.

  As loud as it was, it only registered a second later, when Paige pushed him away.

  “Hope! You’re back!” Paige squeaked. Alex was too breathless and befuddled to move.

  Befuddled. Now, that was new. He’d told himself it was undercover work, and Paige was his partner. But that wasn’t what it had felt like. Did he have to report this now? He could understand his physical reactions to her possessed voice—any behavioral analyst could tell him he had messed-up taste in women. But his reactions to everything else made no sense. It was beyond his realm of experience. Zings from her eyes to his? From his chest to hers? All nuts.

  “Uh, yeah, I’m back. And just in time, too. Was that the Bride of Chucky out there? Were you two putting on a show for her? Man, her face was worth it. I swear she looked more jealous than anything. But you two were enjoying that just a tad too much, don’t you think?”

  Paige’s face went red.

  The door downstairs opened then, and Alex finally managed to move, to see if Charlene McBride was back. His head immediately snapped back, shocked. It was Grandmother Hilda and Great-Aunt Helga. How the hell had they found him? Had he conjured them up by talking about them? It wouldn’t be the first time he’d gotten that feeling.

  His phone buzzed then, and he looked down at the screen to see one word from Boyd: Sorry.

  “Alex, who is woman you kiss? Is she why you move and no say one word?”

  “I wasn’t kissing her. I was pretending to kiss her because of a case,” he said, perfectly aware that more idiotic words had never come out of his mouth.

  “It’s true,” Hope chimed in. “I can vouch for that. My sister is not stupid enough to get involved with Agent Hooke.”

  “If is for case, then why you enjoy so much?” Grandma Hilda asked.

  “Is okay if he enjoy. Men have urges.” Great-Aunt Helga turned to Hope. “Women, too. Is not stupid.”

  Hope’s eyes looked like they were going to pop out of her head. Her mouth was open, and she was looking up at Paige as if she couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

  Alex stood there, immobilized. This couldn’t be happening. He cleared his throat. “Boyd told you where I was staying?” It didn’t make sense. He was on a case.

  “He only say Dayton. The dark-skin one say Spinning Hills. We stop at expensive gypsy coffee shop with strange women, and the old Spanish lady who dress in provocative manner tell us you here.”

  A weird noise came from Paige, and he turned to see she was having a hard time holding everything in.

  * * *

  Tears clouded Paige’s vision. They’d been caught enjoying a fake kiss. What did that even mean? And “old Spanish woman who dress in provocative manner . . .” Rosa would have a fit. She looked down.

  The women below were twins, though there were differences between them. One had more meat on her bones and she had chin-length gray and white hair. The other had short, mostly gray, curly hair. Both wore tracksuits, but one was purple and the other light blue. They rolled their r’s, elongated all “i” and “e” sounds, and pronounced w’s like v’s. They also had zero filter, it seemed, which almost made her forget any inhibition she had about being caught pretend-kissing Alex.

  But then her smile disappeared. Hope would have a field day over what she’d seen. Would she tell Ruby, Rosa, and Grandma? There was no way she could meet Hope’s eyes. If she did, she’d die of embarrassment over what her sister had seen, and go down laughing over what she’d just heard.

  Alex started down the stairs. “Why are you here?” he asked.

  “Is your birthday on Tuesday. You say Americans make big deal about the birthday,” Grandma Hilda said.

  “We here to make big deal,” his aunt Helga declared.

  Alex reached the bottom of the stairs. “I was ten when I said that. I’ve gotten over it. I tell you so every year.”

  “I know what we can do!” Hope said. Her eyes were sparkling. “Let’s go to the expensive gypsy coffee store. They have treats and we can all sing to him.” Paige’s sense of humor came back. There was nothing that would make her day more than watching Ruby, Rosa, and her grandmother interacting with these two. It would also give Hope loads more interesting things to talk and tease about than the almost-kiss.

  “No, no.” His grandmother shook her head. “Alex have the celiac. No treats.”

  “It’s okay, my daughter does, too, and I have gluten-free cookies we can take over there. We can all have treats and sing!” Paige smiled at Alex, who was glaring at her. She glanced down at her watch. She had an hour before her drug test. She’d barely have time, and she wouldn’t be able to change, but it didn’t matter. The drug test was at an independent laboratory, and she no longer had to worry about running into people who expected to see her looking immaculate anyway.

  “I’m meeting two agents today. We’re executing two searches. I don’t have time,” Alex protested.

  “What time are you meeting them?” Hope asked.

  Alex gritted his teeth. “In less than an hour.”

  “That gives us plenty of time! Plus, the café is full on Saturday mornings. You can question a lot of people in one place.” Paige ran into the apartment, grabbed the leftover cookies, and practically skipped down the stairs.

  The moment Hilda and Helga were out the door, Alex turned on Hope and Paige. “You will stop making fun of them this instant. They’re good women who arrived here orphaned, widowed, and very young, with my mom born soon after they arrived. They never really learned to get on, so they clung to each other. Starting a taxi company, hiring mostly migrant men from other countries didn’t help matters. They isolated themselves, in a way. They’re to be admired, not ridiculed, okay?”

  Hope stared him down. “We are not making fun of them. We love them already and we want to spend more time with them, that’s all.”

  Paige nodded emphatically. It was true.

  Alex eyed them. “Women don’t love those two. Women run the moment they meet them. Let them be. I’m warning you.”

  “More threats?” Paige rolled her eyes at him.

  “Our mother arrived intoxicated at Paige’s high school play, and Gracie and I held her up all night, like she was Bernie from Weekend at Bernie’s. We don’t run easily,” Hope countered.

  “And the only fun we’re planning on having is watching them interact with the strange women at the expensive coffee shop,” Paige added, in the spirit of honesty.

  When they walked outside, Hilda and Helga were waiting in the taxicab, both sitting up front. She, Hope, and Alex all squeezed into the back. Thankfully, Hope had maneuvered it so that she was in the middle.

  “So?” she muttered. “Did you two take care of your urges?” Hope asked. Paige knew she wouldn’t drop it easily.

  “The urge to infuriate Glenn and get this all over
with?” Paige asked. “Yes.”

  Hope then turned to Alex. “If your birthday was Tuesday, then why didn’t they make the big deal then?”

  “Russian superstition. Birthdays should be celebrated after the birth date.”

  “So they’re superstitious?” Hope asked.

  “You have no idea.” It was more of a sigh than a reply.

  * * *

  When they walked into the café it was full, as she’d predicted. The Amador brothers were there with their significant others; Holly, Marissa, and Cassie. Marty, the owner of Huffy’s Tavern, was there, too. Paige went over to give him a hug. He was the only one she hadn’t seen since she’d been back, but she sidled back over to Hilda and Helga as quickly as she could. Mr. Linden, the retired school principal, and the mayor were there, too, playing cards. Alex went straight over to them as soon as he walked in.

  The look on Rosa’s face when she saw Hilda and Helga spoke volumes. She narrowed her eyes and folded her arms over her chest. “I thought you said our prices were ridiculous.”

  Hilda looked like she didn’t understand why Rosa was repeating this. “Yes. But business booms. If customer want to be stupid and pay too much, is very smart for you.”

  Rosa looked like she didn’t know how to respond. At first.

  Hope stepped between them and said, “They’re here because Agent Hooke’s birthday was on Tuesday and they want to make a big deal out of it today. We thought we’d bring him over here and sing to him.”

  Grandma Sherry’s eyes sparkled. “What a good idea!” she enthused. She put two fingers in her mouth and whistled high and quick. Everyone quieted down. “I think almost everyone here has spoken to Alex at some point this week.”

  Hilda whispered, “Whistle inside doors is bad luck.”

  Paige looked over at Alex. His expression was neutral. Whatever he was thinking, it didn’t show. It would be impossible to truly get to know someone who was that good at hiding his thoughts.

  “Well, his birthday was on Tuesday, and his grandmother and great-aunt have come all the way from Cincinnati to sing to him today. Will you join us?” she asked. “Treats will be on the house.”