Kade

by Dana Archer

  Then darkness takes everything away.

  Nine

  Zoe

  A soul-shattering scream rips from my throat at the same moment Kade’s naked body hits the ground. The gun I shot Kade with falls from my limp hand. I rush forward and drop to my knees next to him. The curve of Kade’s spine, his tight rear, and his muscular legs paint the picture of a man in the prime of his life. The stillness in his limbs, the lack of breaths expanding his chest, and the blood turning the white snow red tell a different story.

  “He’s not dead.” I drag my shaky fingers over his head. The silky, soft strands slipping between my fingers teases my skin. “He can’t be dead. He’s immortal.”

  Speaking the truth doesn’t miraculously bring Kade back to life. Minutes pass, and he still doesn’t move. The pain in my chest spreads outward, eating away at my strength, my life, my very soul.

  “Don’t you do this to me.” I move my fingers to Kade’s chin and turn his head.

  Blood dribbles from the hole between his eyes over his nose and across his hard-cut cheekbones. His open golden eyes stare at nothingness. There’s no sense of consciousness, no hint of life, no recognition.

  I’m looking death in the face.

  The trembling in my fingers travels up my arms to my chest. My teeth chatter, and salty wetness coats my lips. I lick them, tasting the bitterness of mascara and tears. Who knew I had any left to shed? Or that I’d be crying over a man who lied to me? A shifter who claimed me like some abandoned toy that otherwise would’ve gotten tossed out.

  The knowledge I’m “owned” by this Royal alpha usually flusters me, spurring me to think up ways to defy him. It doesn’t tonight.

  Tonight, I ache.

  Jerking my hands away from Kade’s head, I press my fists to the sharp pain over my heart, then stumble back from where he’s lying there…dead. Or maybe pretending to be dead to punish me.

  “You didn’t lose your head. Your heart’s still in your body.” I rush back to Kade, bend over him, and scream into his face. “You are not dead, so stop playing this game. I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all. Now, stop it!”

  Because the thought of Kade—dead—is not a happy one. In fact, it’s not one I’m sure I can face. The pain in my heart is worse than I’ve ever felt. Worse even than when I learned I lost my family. Worse than when I had to listen to Vince’s side of that night and his tale about how BJ attacked me.

  But it’s my fault Kade’s not breathing. I am the one who hurt him. I pointed the gun and shot.

  With my hand covering my mouth, I choke on a sob. “Darn you, Kade.”

  He can’t die. He just can’t. He needs to be alive. Everyone around him would miss his glare, his bossy attitude, and his know-it-all lectures.

  The heck with everyone else, though. I’ll miss him, if only for his smile. I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who’s ever seen that side of Kade—the one where he’s actually sort of happy—and I’ll be lost if I never hear Kade laugh again. He has a good laugh—a deep, full chuckle. He’s got the kind of laugh a dad would have when his kids were acting goofy for him.

  More tears spill over.

  Sniffling, I grab his shoulder and roll Kade onto his back, cradling his head in my lap. Blood still flows from the hole in his head. His chest doesn’t rise. He doesn’t blink. Had Kade been human, I’d be calling the police to turn myself in for murder.

  “He’s going to be fine.” I brush the short strands of Kade’s golden-blond hair from his forehead. “Do you hear me? You’re going to be fine. You have to be fine. I need you. I need you more than I can put into words.”

  Nothing truer has ever come out of my mouth. I feel the conviction in my heart—in my soul. I need this man to live. I need his bossiness. I need his smile. I simply need Kade in this world.

  “Please don’t be dead.” I stroke my finger over his lower lip. Still soft, still warm, but no breath teases my skin. The flow of blood trickling from the hole in Kade’s head slows, however.

  Leaning over him, I brush my lips over his, and the taste of chocolate teases them. It’s his blood…the blood of a Royal.

  Another memory returns—Kade arguing with me and trying to convince me to take his blood. It’d heal me, he insisted. I’d been bleeding and in pain on the couch in Josh’s office at the Black Widow. Mira’s jaguar had just attacked me. And all I could think about was self-preservation. There was no way I was putting my mouth on Kade, even if it was only his wrist I wrapped my lips around. That man oozed trouble, the kind that could get a girl hooked on him.

  He took the choice out of my hands and got his mouth on me—to heal me. And he did. With each swipe of his tongue over the deep cuts in my thighs, he sealed my fate.

  I stare at the spot between his eyes, but I can’t see well enough in the dark to tell if it’s closing even with the moonlight reflecting off the icy snow on the ground. There’s only one thing to do.

  “I need to go for help. Okay? I’m not abandoning you, but I don’t know how to help you. My phone’s in the ’Cuda. I’m going to go get it, hopefully call for help, then come right back. Promise, Kade. I promise. I won’t leave you.”

  Carefully, I ease out from under Kade, letting his head rest gently on the ground, then I turn from him and run. Twigs and branches break under my boots. Twice, I almost trip. Still, I push myself, running blindly at times when the canopy of evergreens blocks the moonlight.

  Finally, the ’Cuda comes into view. I yank open the driver’s side door. An arm hooks around my chest. And a hand covers my mouth.

  “A promise is a promise, Zoe Jane Conway.” Kade’s voice wraps around me with a force I feel in my heart, maybe my soul. “And I won’t ever allow you to break the one you just made to me.”

  The heat slipping through my body and settling low is all for Kade. The press of his naked body to my back reminds me I never stole a glimpse of Kade’s groin while he was lying on the ground. I wish I would’ve. The growing length pushing into my back promises to either terrify me as being way beyond anything a woman can safely take into her body or ruin me for other lovers. And honestly, both options leave me a little anxious.

  I curl my fingers around Kade’s wrist and draw his palm from my mouth. He doesn’t fight me. His thumb tugs on my lip as I pull his hand down. “What promise is that?”

  “To never leave me.” Kade brushes his lips over my cheek, then touches the tip of his tongue to the corner of my mouth.

  I turn my head, twisting in his embrace. The blood is gone. So is the hole between his eyes. All that’s left is a determined and focused gaze of a predator who’s caught his prey. “I never said never.”

  Kade’s mouth curves into the smile I’ve only seen a handful of times. Each one left my heart racing. This time’s no different. My quickened breaths fog the air.

  With his focus on my mouth, Kade reaches down and raises the lever for the seat, folding it down. Then he lifts me with a hand under my bottom and maneuvers us into the backseat. I don’t resist him. I cling to him, hooking my ankles at his lower back and interlacing my fingers behind his neck. His intense gaze holds me captivated, intrigued, and…caught.

  My rear meets the cushioned bench seat, and my hands slip over Kade’s shoulders. He releases me and closes the door, then lowers the passenger seat, opening up the space in the back. He kneels on the floor in front of me, somehow squeezing his large frame comfortably into the spot. Then studies me, a slow sweeping inspection that has me trembling by the time his focused stare reaches my face.

  Darkness paints a streak over his rough face, except for part of his nose and one golden-brown eye. Green, yellow, and black streaks bleed into the white of that single eye locked on to me, turning it completely golden and etched like the most exquisite gemstone. Never have I seen anything as dangerously beautiful as Kade with his primal side peeking through.

  A guttural sound slips from my throat. It’s not a pretty sound, not a noise I’ve ever made before, but it’s all I can
manage. The anticipation building within me blends with the sexual heat warming me and leaves me pliant and eager. I can’t explain the reaction. Or say I’ve ever felt anything like this before. All I know is I’m hanging on every nuance in Kade’s expression. In this moment, he’s my entire world, my reason for living.

  Blocking out his image, I take a moment to get myself together. My thoughts are as crazy as the voice in my head sometimes makes me feel. Kade’s hot but he’s just a guy. Okay, he’s a shifter, but he’s not my everything. To that, I swear, but each passing second, Kade’s scent fills my lungs and strengthens me. He smells rich and earthy and reminds me of life.

  “I mean it, Zoe. I’m holding you to your promise.”

  Kade’s voice works through me, sensitizing my body and making me ache for his touch. “I didn’t say I’d never leave you.”

  Kade drags the back of his hand over my cheek, answering my silent wish, and turns my head slightly, then bends over me, his mouth inches above mine. “You will.”

  And then Kade’s lips cover mine. His tongue twines with mine. And my resistance—if I even had any left—slips away.

  Ten

  Zoe

  After you make it through your teenage years, you’re supposed to know enough to stop doing stupid stuff like have sex in the backseat of a car. Life experiences or maturity or some kind of adult reasoning kicks in and stops you from giving in to impulses. That’s what adults always said growing up. Apparently, knowing better doesn’t apply when you’re in the arms of an alpha shifter who drips sexuality and possesses the strength of a walking god.

  Or the descendent of a goddess.

  I lift my head from Kade’s shoulder and press my trembling hands against his chest. Hard muscles and glistening warm skin send a little shiver through me to settle low. Kade groans, the sound threatening to push me to the point where nothing would stop me from pleasuring him. Again.

  I doubt he’d have any issues with fooling around again. From his thick arms that could easily hold me up all night to his well-defined abs and powerful thighs, he’s built for loving women. Taking me over and over tonight would be nothing to a man like Kade. Me, on the other hand? I’d never be the same. Then again, I don’t know if more sex matters. No man—shifter or human—can compare to what Kade did to me or how he touched me.

  Or how he could shine light into my dark soul.

  Kade lifts my chin until I’m staring into his face, not down the length of the perfect body I’m positive I’ll dream about for the rest of my life. This view isn’t much better, though. Chiseled features, a stubborn press to his lips, blond hair that has a shimmering quality even in this dim light, and golden tanned skin paints an image of masculine beauty, but it’s his fully golden eyes I can’t stop looking into. They’re hypnotic and more beautiful than anything I’ve ever seen. I could find heaven within them.

  The gentle press of Kade’s fingertips to the back of my hand registers. I ease my trembling fingers from where I was caressing Kade’s face. Or at least I try to. Kade’s slight touch firms, holding me in place with my fingertips resting against his temple and my black fingernails near his heated, inhuman eyes.

  “It’s no wonder why shifter women can’t stop watching you when you come into the Black Widow.”

  “Why’s that?”

  Although no longer quite as gravelly or animalistic, Kade’s voice sounds just as dangerously sexy as it did when he asked permission to be with me. I couldn’t deny him then, and I can’t now. And that is what makes Kade threatening to what little peace I’ve found in life. I’d tell him anything, do everything, and try whatever he suggested if he asked me. I wouldn’t care about the consequences. All that’d matter is that he’d keep looking at me this way. It’s addicting. Healing. Freeing. With Kade’s gaze on me, everything bad I’ve done fades away, turning me into some kind of angel or something equally worthy of him.

  “Zoe?” Kade moves his hand from covering mine to my mouth, slipping his fingertip between my lips. “Why’s that?”

  I swirl my tongue around his finger, focusing on his taste and not his fully colored feline eyes. “They were hoping you’d look their way and notice them. Maybe choose them. Now I know why. They wanted to see this.”

  “What’s this?”

  Going by his slight intake of breath and the excited hitch to his voice, he knows what I’m referring to, but wants me to say it. I can’t refuse him. The compulsion to respond is irresistible.

  I trace Kade’s eyelids. He closes them, hiding the temptation his eyes pose but drawing attention to his full, thick lashes. The almost feminine quality to them enhances the aura he gives off instead of dimming it. He’s as strikingly deadly as the big cats he houses. “Your eyes. They’re gorgeous like this.”

  “Without any white showing.”

  “Yes.” I answer even though his tone doesn’t hold a question.

  Kade cradles my face between his big hands, the gentle pressure of his thumbs calming me. “No other female has ever seen my eyes like this. No other female ever will either. Only you.”

  Had Kade not been holding me, I would’ve retreated from the expression of wonder softening Kade’s normally impassive features. Not out of fear, but out of compassion. I don’t enjoy hurting men. I force a chuckle. “No other lover’s ticked you off enough to bring out this side of you, huh? I guess that means I’m lucky to be the one to make you snap.”

  “This has nothing to do with you ticking me off.”

  Everything within me wants to ask what it means, but something tells me I don’t want to know. I tug Kade’s wrists, pulling his hands off me, then separate our bodies. My breath rushes out, and the sensation I’ve lost something precious and irreplaceable overwhelms me. I sit back on Kade’s bent legs while the odd feeling passes. “Well, I’m glad I didn’t anger you too much, then. Look, I didn’t know that jaguar was you. I was just doing what I’ve always done. Protecting myself, you know? A girl can’t take too many chances, especially when there’re predators in the woods.”

  Kade watches me. He doesn’t lecture me about shooting without knowing my target’s name, even though I deserve the lecture. Had the jaguar I shot been a single shifter, he would’ve died. He had to be a shifter too. Jaguars aren’t native to West Virginia. The ugly truth is—I acted on my emotion. And for what? To appease some part of me—that crazy part who wants to bathe in the blood of my enemies—by hurting Vince?

  Even if the big cat was Vince, he wouldn’t have died. Vince may not be as strong as Kade, but he’s still immortal. Just like Kade. They’re both special, descended from powerful goddesses. I’m not. There’s nothing special about me, and Kade needs to realize that before he gets some crazy idea in his head just as Vince did once. I succeeded in setting him straight back in high school. Something tells me Kade won’t be so easily swayed, however. All I can do is try.

  “Well, I’m safe. You’re alive. And”—I reach over the folded-down front seats and pull a couple of T-shirts from my bag—“it’s late. How about I drive you back to wherever you left your car, and we can go back to our places. Call it a night. You know, we had a good time, but now it’s over.”

  “For tonight.”

  I glance at Kade—a mistake. He could be a wicked sex demon or something. If he curled his finger, I’d crawl back on his lap. “Yep, definitely for tonight. It’s also over for—”

  “For tonight only.” Kade slides his hands up my thighs. “But we will pick up again exploring this connection between us later today. That I promise you.”

  With a hard flick of my wrist, I toss a shirt at Kade, hitting his face. He makes no move to grab it. He sits up, the pink cotton top falling over his groin.

  I tug my top over my head. “No. I don’t think that’ll be happening. This was great and all, but I’m more of a one-and-done kind of girl, and I don’t—”

  “Zoe.”

  His tone stops my rambling, stops my breath, stops the world around me. All that’s left is Kade and w
hat he’s going to say.

  Kade draws me forward, sliding me up his legs until the discarded shirt separate us. “Don’t fear this.”

  “I don’t fear anything.”

  “Don’t lie to me.”

  “I’m not.” I spread my fingers over Kade’s chest, keeping the space between our bodies. “Why should I fear anything? I can only control so much. If I can’t stop something bad from happening, then that’s the way it is. Some things in life hurt.”

  “Fear can keep us alive.”

  “If I die because I’ve done something stupid, then I die.”

  “You can’t die.” Kade wraps his arms around me and bends his head closer, his lips brushing my temple. “You’re too important to me.”

  “Then you need to reexamine what that word means to you. Someday, I’m going to die. That’s just the way it is. You can’t stop old age. So my advice to you is to save that particular emotion for someone who can return the sentiment. I can’t.”

  Silence stretches between us, building into a tension I can’t bring myself to break even though I know nothing good will come from whatever Kade is struggling to say. Finally, he exhales, the warmth of his breath compelling me to lean into him with an unspoken promise he alone can chase the chill from my soul. “You’re my true mate, Zoe Jane Conway.”

  The laugh on my lips is the crazed kind. I lean back as far as Kade’s loose embrace allows and take in his image. Seriousness leaves his gaze focused and firms the already hard press of his mouth. I shake my head on another twisted sound. “Are you sure you’re completely healed? I did use hollow-point bullets. Maybe you should go home and get a good night’s rest. Don’t worry, I won’t mention you’re messed up and rambling to anyone. It’ll be our little secret.”

  “You’re my true mate, Zoe Jane Conway. I don’t need time to think about it or consider what it means. It’s a truth I feel in my soul.”