No Turning Back, A Breaking the Rules Novel

by A. m Madden

  Since Riana got home from the hospital, she had been recuperating nicely. With every day that went by, she seemed stronger and more like herself.

  At her first postpartum exam two weeks after giving birth, Dr. White had been pleased with her progress. If all continued to go well, Riana could introduce running again and light yoga after her next appointment in a few weeks. She couldn’t wait, anxious to return to her normal… less being a pescatarian. It seemed my girl enjoyed her meat too much.

  As for myself, I thanked God every day for her being okay. Although Riana faced my worst fears, she survived it and so had I. While physically she was on the mend, emotionally I worried about her.

  We had a counselor coming to the house once a week. Apparently, her emotional distress had to do with hormones and postpartum. I got that. It was the underlying layer of sadness that stemmed from what she’d admitted in the hospital that killed me. She never brought it up again. Still, I couldn’t help but wonder how much having a child had been on her mind, and how much it contributed to her mood.

  The entire situation tore a piece of my heart out little by little. I hated myself. Now knowing she wanted kids, how could I deny her that? On the other hand, how would I survive anything nearly as terrifying as the complications she’d had during delivery. Fuck, I’d never known fear like that. It was all too much to digest… so much so, I called my brother and asked him one question—did he want another child?

  It was something I never had the nerve to ask, and in all fairness, he wasn’t in the right frame of mind to consider it.

  His response was quick and short. Absolutely.

  My silence prompted him to explain that it took finding Hope to remind him he may have experienced a horrific loss, but his desire for a family didn’t die with them.

  Our conversation left me stunned, and I had a lot to think about.

  And that was all that I’d been doing these past few weeks… thinking. It was when life veered off track when things were put into perspective. Sure, after an uncomplicated pregnancy, Riana should’ve had a normal delivery. After I took a leap of faith and quit my successful job, I should’ve slid right into a successful business.

  Should’ve… should’ve… should’ve.

  Fuck should’ve.

  But Riana was fine, and for that I was so grateful. And even though my career was in shambles, I was so grateful for cutting ties with a man who I now knew had a black soul.

  The thinking led to a few epiphanies.

  First and foremost, I decided life was just too short—too short to stress, too short to second-guess. It would be one of the hardest things I’d ever done, but I decided to stop fighting for my life in a business I wasn’t sure I liked anymore.

  I had plenty saved up, and if I sold the Miami condo, I’d have some leeway to take a much-needed break, enjoy Ree, and decide what I wanted to do next. Maybe I’d take a page out of Bryce’s book and mentor kids, start a tutoring business to get them academically on track before they were thrown into situations where they were forced to chase their own tails. The possibilities were endless, and with Ree by my side, it didn’t matter what I ended up doing as long as I came home to her every night.

  Second, and more important… I would make Riana my wife and then the mother of my children.

  It was Monday morning, and while Riana slept peacefully beside me, I slipped out of bed and closed the door. After taking Kayla for a quick walk, I fed her breakfast, prepped my first of many coffees, and slid into my office to get some work done.

  There wasn’t much to do. The rumor situation had dried up any new prospects. Really, my time was spent keeping our existing clients that I had while Wes took over traveling to scout out young athletes.

  It was Wes I worried about. He’d put his faith in me, and I’d failed him. Because of my reputation and track record, my business should’ve thrived right out of the gate. I’d taken for granted things would go well for us. Dumb, especially knowing what Doug was capable of. I would never take what should happen for granted ever again.

  My mind had been entranced by the long list of emails that always accumulated over a weekend. I vowed not to touch work once I turned off my computer on Friday nights. That meant being bombarded come Mondays.

  Most were more of the same: people looking for that exclusive interview with Ryder Carter. Until my phone ringing with a call from Joseph caused a moan.

  “This can’t be good,” I mumbled before saying, “Hello.”

  “It’s done, Ryder. It’s over.”

  Assuming I hadn’t heard him right, I said, “Say again?”

  “It’s over. Doug Morton has settled out of court for two million dollars along with a prepared statement released to the press. Quint Lawson will be breaking the news this evening on his show. I told you I was handling it.”

  I’d been so stunned that I couldn’t speak except for “How?”

  “The thing with a rumor is there is rarely proof to substantiate it. No different than someone being accused of something. Once it spreads, whether true or not, the stigma would always be there. Some would always believe it. It’s a cheap way to cause damage without implications in court. But when a rumor has roots, like a cash trail, it goes from mere speculation to extortion.”

  “That prick.”

  “Yeah. It seems Mr. Morton made quite a few payments to a student whose family faced financial hardship. While carrying a huge loan on their shoulders, Morton paid the kid to falsely impersonate athletes struggling with their GPAs. He had that racket going for a while, even as you worked for him. It seemed to be his security net if you, or any of his other agents, were to leave. And you did just that.

  “Your resignation set the wheels in motion. Morton went from paying the kid off to bribing him to keep his mouth shut. Worked for a while. Turned out the kid has a conscience.”

  “Motherfucker. How did you find this kid?”

  “That’s my job, Ryder. Once I revealed the kid’s sworn statement to Doug, he knew he faced a lot worse in court than my demands. In my opinion, he got off cheap. He’s a real snake oil salesman, that one. But I knew you didn’t want to drag this on. Your name will be cleared, and you’ll have a nice little nest egg to help you get back on your feet. Besides, after this, athletes will be flocking to your agency. Sooner than you think.”

  “I don’t know what to say, Joseph. ‘Thank you’ doesn’t seem enough.” I really owed him so much. Not only for saving my business and clearing my name but for doing it at a cost I could afford. Joseph had charged me a fraction of his usual hourly rate. I also owed Ricky for insisting I use Joseph. “I would like to pay you in full.”

  “Not necessary. Your case hit a nerve with me. It was a pleasure watching that prick sweat.” After he congratulated me and hung up, I sat staring at the phone for a long time before dialing Wes.

  “Hey. I was just about to call you. You’re never gonna believe this.”

  “I could say the same. You first.”

  “I’m flying to Pittsburgh. Meriwether is a yes.”

  Doug wasn’t kidding in that new clients flocking sooner than I thought.

  We had chased Declan Meriwether for months. Still a junior in high school, he’d already created enough chatter in the football world to get noticed. Built like a tank at sixteen, the possibilities to be signed were endless. And now we’d gotten him.

  “You there?”

  “Yeah,” I said a bit stupefied.

  “I thought you’d be losing your shit.”

  “Oh, I am. I just can’t believe this. Joseph called. Doug settled. Two million, and a prepared statement for the press.”

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” Wes said so loudly Riana probably heard him. “Holy shit, Ryder! We did it! We fucking did it!”

  “We sure did, buddy.”

  Riana was always going on about manifesting. She believed it with every fiber of her being, and after the morning I’d had, I now did too.

  I found Ree sitting on t
he balcony, sipping a cup of tea. She seemed in a trance, staring at nothing. I took a moment to watch her, knowing what I was about to share would lift a huge burden from her shoulders.

  The sound of the sliding door caught her attention, and she turned toward me with a smile.

  “Baby, you’re not going to believe this.” I squatted at her knees and took her hands in mine. Big brown eyes searched my face as I said, “Doug called. It’s over.” Her pretty lips parted in surprise as I recounted the conversation I’d had with my lawyer. Through it all, her smile grew, and the sadness I’d become accustomed to seeing in her eyes slowly ebbed.

  She threw her arms around my neck, squeezing me for dear life. “I knew it! I knew it would go away!”

  “You did, baby.” I gently pulled her arms away from my neck to stare into her eyes. “I hated putting you through it all. Thank you for being there for me.”

  “Always, Ryder. Every day for forever.”

  “There’s more… ,” I went on to say. “Wes called. We got Meriwether.”

  “Oh my God, Ryder! That’s fantastic!”

  She kissed me softly, and then it seemed as though she had something else to say but didn’t. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing’s wrong. It’s just that… don’t be mad, okay?”

  “Oh no… what did you do, Ree?”

  “Hear me out,” she was quick to say. “I overheard you talking to Wes about Declan Meriwether, and I, um… I know his mother.” As I continued to stare at her, she rushed on to say, “Yolanda was a client of mine at Angels on Earth. We kept in touch over the years, and I knew she would want her son to sign with someone as moral as you, Ryder. She needed to hear the truth from someone she could trust. That was me. So I called Joseph. I wanted to be sure what I planned to do was okay. He gave me the green light, confiding that things were going well on his end. And then I made the call.”

  “Riana.”

  “Don’t Riana me. There was something I could do to help, and I did it. You guys handled all the legwork; I merely opened a window. After Yolanda Meriwether and I caught up, she told me that Declan was undecided between you and another agent. He didn’t care about the rumors, having followed your career. But he worried that your agency wouldn’t survive the gossip. All I did was explain the situation to her and left it at that. It was up to Declan to decide. Which he did. I’m not sorry for that… I’m sorry for keeping it from you.”

  She waited as I processed it all, and then her eyes widened a bit when I pulled her to standing and wrapped her in my arms. “Riana, don’t ever apologize for having my back, or for doing something out of your love for me.”

  I’d been there. I was guilty of the same. Stemming back from leaving her behind so she could continue in a job she loved. Or for keeping my business failures to myself to spare her from stress.

  I’d done it all for her… and I would do anything for her. Like having a baby. If she couldn’t conceive, then we would consider every possibility available to us. I knew without a doubt when that day came that old fears would rear their ugly heads… sure as shit, I’d keep that from her to spare her worrying about me. From start to finish, I’d experience it all with her because I loved her. We did what we had to for the ones we loved… without apology.

  “I love you,” she said, resuming her kiss until I pulled away and stared into her eyes.

  “I love you too. And there will be plenty of times I fuck up in our relationship. Just remember, like you, I do it out of my love for you.”

  “Sounds like this is a disclaimer, Mr. Carter.”

  “It’s a promise, Miss Carter, soon to be Mrs. Carter.” As I stood there holding her, kissing her like a starved man, I had to mentally thank Wes for being horny that night and dragging me to a loud, noisy club in Miami.

  Epilogue

  Him

  Ten months later

  It felt like a wonderful dream. There had been only one time in my life when profound happiness squeezed my insides to the point of nausea, and that was when she’d agreed to be my wife.

  I was marrying her.

  After all these years, some together, the awful ones we’d spent apart, and then the amazing ones when we were together again… it was all for now. This was the moment I wanted more than anything in my life. To finally make her my wife.

  The piece of paper that would say so was validation that we’d fallen back in love after a second chance. That my leaving her before wasn’t in vain. That we now shared a life in Florida just as I imagined we would.

  The R. Carter Agency was thriving as I hoped. We now had a location in Miami, employing twenty-plus employees, including a nonprofit agency under the management of my soon-to-be wife. She helped us set up Score to Learn, helping athletes improve their academics with tutoring services on campuses. So far we were present in ten universities, with fifty more scheduled to hop on board in the next year.

  She had been very busy with Angels on Earth as well. It was now a huge success in Miami-Dade County and surrounding areas, with other locations popping up around the country. Her office and staff occupied the ground floor of my building in downtown Fort Lauderdale. Unless I had to travel, every morning we walked to work together, and every evening we walked home together. On some of those trips that I took, she came along to scout possible locations for Angels on Earth.

  The rest of our time had been spent taking that monthly escape that I had started last year. We also socialized with Ricky, Cooper, and the twins often. Riana had formed a special bond with those adorable girls. And our favorite thing to do was having downtime with our precious Kayla while counting the days until our wedding.

  She wanted a small, intimate gathering. I scanned the neatly lined rows where my parents; Ricky; Marco; her friend Janie and Janie’s fiancé, Ross; Wes and London; my brother’s girl, Hope; and a few of my clients made up a good chunk of the guests who came to witness our day.

  After the ceremony, there would be a reception at the restaurant overlooking this park. Our guests would feast on delicious food and an open bar, dancing to a band into the late hours of the night. And then I would be whisking her away for a honeymoon beginning with a week on Bella Viaggi I before flying to Europe for an additional two weeks.

  London, Rome, Cannes, Barcelona.

  As promised, my girl deserved to see the world.

  With luck, I’d knock her up on that honeymoon. That was my plan, at least. And once we returned, my wedding gift to her would be revealed—a house on Rebecca and Marco’s street for us to raise our family in.

  The music shifted, and everyone twisted in their seats to watch Rebecca walk down the white runner. Anticipation had my stomach flipping, while my brother placed a hand on my shoulder in a sign of support. His other hand tightly held on to Kayla’s leash, the dog sporting a burgundy bow around her neck, matching Rebecca’s gown.

  Meanwhile, all I could do was home in on the spot where she would soon be appearing.

  And then there she was, her arm tucked under Cooper’s, wearing a simple satin gown that dipped at her waist and flared out in soft pleats around her to the floor. Her arms and shoulders covered in an intricate lace that revealed just a hint of her smooth skin. A small veil pinned into the waves of her golden-brown hair. While she held a simple bouquet of burgundy roses, the oranges, reds, and yellows decorating the trees around us served as a stunning backdrop to her beauty.

  As melodies from the harpist beckoned her closer, my heart threatened to explode in my chest with overwhelming emotions I struggled to contain.

  She reached where I stood, smiling brilliantly. Cooper gently kissed her forehead and offered me his hand to shake before taking a seat next to his husband. Rebecca accepted her bouquet before we stepped onto the gazebo together.

  “You look stunning,” I said, taking her hands in mine.

  “You look hot,” she countered, and I laughed.

  “Ready?” The preacher smiled at us and at our nod opened his Bible to begin the ceremony. />
  The entire time I couldn’t take my eyes off her. When the time came to say our vows, she stole my breath with not only her words but the love I saw on her face. When it came time to recite mine, autopilot kicked in, because I had been in a hypnotic trance.

  We rushed through exchanging rings, wanting to get to the good part. The part when the preacher finally pronounced us man and wife, the part he gave us permission to kiss. We crashed into each other, bodies and lips, kissing passionately while forgetting everyone and everything around us.

  Engaged in a desperate clutch, neither of us wanted to let go. We were now promised to each other for all eternity. The moment I had waited for had come.

  When my large palms drew her even closer, refusing to break away from her lips, she sighed into my mouth. We were seconds from turning a corner our guests should not have to see.

  Someone clearing their throat caused her to giggle adorably and gently shove me away. The crowd laughed and heckled, and neither of us cared. Through it all, her eyes shimmered with emotion in the revealing sunlight, bright and beautiful while exposing every ounce of love she held for me. I didn’t have a doubt that mine mimicked hers.

  “You’re mine,” I said against her lips.

  “I’ve always been yours,” she said back.

  “I’ll love you… forever.”

  Her

  I leaned on my tiptoes, placing my lips on his ear. His grip around my waist tightened, and when I whispered, “You’ll love us forever. I’m pregnant,” he straightened in shock before crushing his lips to mine once again.

  The End

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