Tree of Life

by Sarah Joy Green-Hart

  If it made him happy, it made her happy, so she seated herself again, pushing the dirty pot out of her mind.

  * * *

  Even as the cool evening seeped into the forest, Mama and Papa had not returned. Woodcutters and herbalists were returning from their day’s journeys, and only a few stragglers lingered on the forest floor.

  Adahy took a great breath and sighed it out. "I’m thrilled, Hesper. A week is too long now that the decision is made.” He stood and grabbed his bag. "But we ought to part ways. I will inquire after Theia and Avriam. It’s odd that they haven’t returned yet.”

  Hesper stood and bowed her head, smiling her gratitude. She must compliment him, but her courage failed. He would leave! He could not leave before she said something kind to him.

  Would she say something poetic and foolish? Perhaps he would think it was silly or lacking in sincerity. Maybe this would make it harder for him not to touch her. Would it?

  Just do it.

  She pulled words out of her fear and opened her mouth to let them fall where they would. "You are the most handsome man I know, and you are very wise, and your eyes are like the stars.”

  There. She said it.

  A few moments passed, feeling more like minutes. She focused instead on the fine quality of her beaded poppies on his bag.

  "Very poetic, my dear friend. Lovely of you to say.” His words stroked her ears with the softness of milkweed. "You know, no one has ever mentioned whether touching hair is allowed.”

  "My hair?”

  "Your hair.”

  "I think you would feel your conscience too well.”

  "Not a bit. I’d come nearer and kiss your face, but that will have to wait. I promise the stars in my eyes will always be there to see clearly. No more of this treetops-in-the-way torture.” He kissed his fingertips and tipped them toward her, then walked away.

  She steadied herself with a deep, cleansing breath before leaping to the first branch of her tree and climbing to the loft. She sat for only a few minutes to ponder and gush over the day’s events, then the hatch opened, and Mama entered, followed by Papa.

  Something was wrong.

  Four | Post-Conquest: 232

  Mama dropped to her knees in front of Hesper. "This morning, Tangi and Tane said they were going to the clearing in the east, and they have not returned.” She wiped tears from her face. "They should be in a loft somewhere. Anywhere!”

  Hesper reached out to hold Mama and hug away the sharpness of the fear. Mama, the ever-present comforter had held her many times. This was the least Hesper could do. Hesper turned her face to kiss her.

  "Wife!”

  Stunned, Mama stiffened and pulled away to stand and face Papa. "Husband?”

  "Your rambling will do nothing for Tane.” Papa spoke half to himself as he paced the floor. "Those boys have probably made stigs of themselves in a Meros home on the ground. Our enemy troubles us enough, and we do not need trouble from our own. If Tane returns unharmed, his venture will have been a waste. Experience is the only thing that boy does not have. Perhaps it will drive the truth into his dense mind.” Papa slapped his own head.

  "In the meantime, we will not speak of him. If he never brings his rebellious, wandering feet back to us, we will not utter his name again. One less impediment to unity.”

  Mama’s confident gaze melted into sorrow. She threw herself on the floor, face to the wooden boards.

  In the past, Mama and Papa had a fair number of disagreements. Many frustrating moments for Mama, and justifiably angry times for Papa, but never had Mama offered herself with the plea.

  "Avriam, I beg you not to sacrifice your son for unity. I offer you the plea. I will do anything that you ask of me. Do not abandon our son.” She took a long, congested breath and shuddered it out. "Do not dishonor the wisdom of our ancestors who gave us the plea to stir compassion in those with power in the community.”

  Papa stood, erect and unyielding, while Mama, vulnerable and broken, waited for him to relent.

  "You are stronger than I am.” Her hand jerked forward, hesitated, then took Papa’s foot. The other followed. "I must obey you, but I beg you not to require something so bitter and painful.”

  Papa’s posture did not alter. Clearly, he had no intention of responding in a receptive, traditional manner.

  If Papa would just touch Mama’s head, speak Tane’s name—console her.

  Hesper’s eyes stung at the thought.

  He would not give in. So, Mama did.

  She stood and shuffled wearily to her place behind the deer hides. The dull light made Papa a mere silhouette in the middle of the loft. Still as Hesper was, the force of her heart’s pulsations made her body sway involuntarily.

  If she went to bed now, it would be over in the morning.

  No. This would never be over.

  "Papa,” she whispered.

  The floor of the loft creaked and hide brushed against hide. He must be looking at her.

  Tears blurred her vision as she stood. "I have something to say to you.” How weak she sounded. “You are in error to speak to Mama that way. Mama has proven her worth as a human. She possesses the blood of Unified leaders, which is something you do not have.” Her voice grew stronger for this step. She would not retreat.

  "Hesper, no.” Mama called out from behind her curtain with a choke and a sob. "Quiet, girl. Go to bed.”

  "I am a woman, not a girl.” Hesper inhaled through her nose and exhaled through her mouth. Her voice belonged to this declaration, and she must not say it quietly. "Mama opened herself to receive and give life to the Unified people through her children. She is the epitome of feminine strength. You have dishonored her and her reasonable grief, and I am ashamed of it.”

  Had the loss of his children finally broken Papa’s mind?

  "Something bad must have happened to Tane, your son. He would never join the Meros, so what qualm do you have with him?”

  "Child!” Papa barked. "Who has given you life? Yourself? Have you done it?”

  "No, sir. I am living it and using it to speak. Who gave Mama life? Was it you, sir? No!” Her voice crumbled into tears. "You have wronged her and our ancestors in doing so. This is not the way of the Unified. You speak of the shame Tane brings to us, and now you shame us with your hard mind.”

  "First I shame our ancestors’ wisdom.” Papa tossed his hands in the air. "Now I shame the Unified with my resolve! Tell me more. Pour more shame on me! Shame for keeping you in a safe, warm loft. Shame for bringing you up into adulthood. Shame for my work and devotion to our people.”

  Hesper stepped toward Papa, reaching. "You yourself taught me that we speak honestly and respectfully to all. It honors their humanity. You do not even honor her humanity, much less her noble birth and motherhood. You have taught me how we must latch on to peace in every circumstance, shunning deep anger that will cause us to hate or behave irrationally. Peace makes unity, turbulence causes division. Are those not honorable words you have said to me and now forget?”

  A rap on the loft’s hatch startled them both.

  "Who is it?” Papa’s cold voice chilled Hesper.

  "Adahy!” he called, almost cheerful. "I’m here to see Hesper. I’ll be gone for a few days, and I want to speak with her before I go.”

  "Go, speak with him,” Papa whispered.

  Hesper wiped her face and strode past Papa to open the hatch. Adahy stood at the foot of the tree, waiting for her. Trembling, she lowered herself to the branches and climbed down to meet him. His voice had been so happy, but when she saw him, concern had stolen the stars from his eyes.

  Hesper led him a few paces from the oak where she rested her forehead against the bare trunk of a loblolly pine and touched its comforting roughness. Her thumb resisted movement in a spot of tacky resin.

  "Papa is angry with me,” she breathed. "Adahy, he might even postpone our marriage if he thinks I am unfit to marry.”

  "A verbal agreement is binding. The elders will not allow hi
m to back out of a marriage arrangement so easily. I won’t allow it.”

  When he spoke with certainty, he had the ability to convince her of almost anything.

  His voice laughed. "Maybe he will be anxious to get you off his hands now.”

  "I cannot stand by without doing something. Papa will not allow us to talk about Tane until he returns. Tane is dead to us as Joram was.”

  "I’m sorry, Hesper.” His hand rested near hers on the tree trunk. "Regardless of Avriam’s shortcomings, I am grateful you were born to a man like him. He loved and cared for you with the same ferocity with which he rejects and scorns your foolish brothers, and it has served you well as a person. Hold on to that knowledge.”

  Hesper faced him and pressed her back to the tree. Her mind and heart raced one another to a place far from reason.

  "I have high regard for your sense of justice, dear friend, but for your own good, you must calm yourself. Will you calm down?”

  A few quiet moments passed between their forest-shadowed faces. Adahy’s presence nourished her like deer bone soup. Still, something lacked. The hardy, satisfying experience of human touch. The meat and salt of the soup.

  "Hesper, listen to me. Your emotions will settle because you are able to make it happen.” His voice, soft and quiet, calmed her. "You are strong that way. You sting with nettle, but imagine the jewelweed a wise woman such as yourself has grown alongside it.”

  Weak and shaky, a laugh wiggled its way out of her. "The antidote to a nettle’s sting. Often grows nearby. You are clever.”

  "I try.” He chuckled. "Remember, please, peace and safety are in your loft, guarded by strong, gentle trees. You are home and you are with me, and you’re in the forest, which means you are safe, and you can relax . . .”

  The water and light sensation came from him now, just as it came from her earlier. Tears subsided as she wrangled her feelings into submission. "How did you do that?”

  "A trick I learned from you today, and something I learned from a sympathetic Meros quite some time ago.” He shifted, sliding his bag farther up his shoulder. "I love you, Hesper. I will see you in a few days.”

  They bowed to each other, and Adahy ran to the west on noiseless hunter’s feet, as always.

  Now, back to Papa. To the argument that would not go well. Hesper’s first time defying him. If only the god Adahy spoke of were real. It would be nice to imagine that a powerful being would hear her cry for help. Help to find Tane.

  Upon entering the thick black of the loft, she set the hatch in its place with a hope that Papa had gone to bed. When the silence settled, his voice, sharp and short, emerged from the darkness

  "Did he touch you?”

  What? "No. No, Papa, of course not.”

  "If that is so, I am forced to believe you spoke poorly of me. Why else would you step away from the loft? You had business you wanted either unheard or unseen. Since Adahy is too honorable and you are too honest for me to insist he touched you, I must believe the only other possibility.” Papa slapped her face. "Your brother has brought enough shame to us today,” he growled. "You will not do the same. Go to sleep.”

  The sound of Papa’s feet crossed the loft to his bed. He laid down and settled beside Mama, leaving Hesper dumbstruck in the shadows. Like the crack of a tree branch she trusted to hold her up, Papa’s patience ended. His desire to punish Tane unleashed him on the innocent with the discrimination of an injured badger. Hesper charged to her bed-pelt and laid down. Her wet, stinging face contorted with anger, but she would settle her emotions. She was strong that way.

  An involuntary whimper came up with a sob, and she shoved it down. Hard. Adahy, hurry home.

  * * *

  He had to go now if he intended to return in time to be a part of the wedding preparations. Hesper had been dealing with her father’s temper all her life, and she would be okay. He had to trust Avriam and trust the culture. It was the Unified way.

  Unity without meddling.

  Out of the woods and to the west, he waded through tall grass. The faint sugary scent of evergreens blew his way. He dug a lemon-spice drop out of his bag and popped it into his mouth.

  Hesper often had her recurring nightmare after troubling experiences. It might be good to be around for her to talk to tomorrow morning—just in case. Maybe staying for one more day would be wise. He stopped to consider.

  The lemon candy coating had dissolved. Soft, honey-sweet spice crunched under his teeth.

  This had been a good day. That would balance it out and spare her the troubling dream. She’d be okay.

  He carried on walking.

  Hesper’s brother, Tane, on the other hand, was a zealous bonehead. Tane was with the Earth People. Absolutely. He’d been doing their work, climbing their ladder, gaining authority in their ranks. Often out in public, sometimes dressed in Meros clothing to fit in, he was always up to no good.

  Couldn’t the Unified be content with peace in the forest for now? Peace so near he could almost kiss it. These stubborn Unified folks would push the Kyrios and their military too far and destroy themselves. The Kyrios and law enforcement wardens might back off for a while if the Unified would bide their time. Not that hiding was the solution. They must rebel against the oppression someday, but not now.

  Past the tall grass, he stood on the abandoned dirt road that would take him home. Instead, business called him three miles west, where he’d find a place to sleep for the night before running his errands and returning.

  Back to chaos. Back to the corruption of the outside world. For his people’s sake. For the Unified.

  He couldn’t kiss peace, but he would kiss Hesper, and that was close.

  * * *

  Hesper’s small hands scooped a mess of burnt-orange evergreen needles into a pile. With a snap, she broke off a bumpy stick doll from the tall, dead pine and named it Cassia.

  Just as she laid Cassia in its prickly, dry bed, the crunch of footsteps turned her around. Hesper screamed and backed into the low-hanging branches. Twigs scratched, leaves shook and fluttered against her face and arms as she flailed her way out of them and took in the sight of the beardless man who startled her. How strangely he dressed, wearing a hat and stiff black clothes with gold buttons as shiny as his boots. He had to be Meros. Unified did not dress that way.

  She had snatched up a kit the day before and felt a tiny heart thundering inside its warm, furry little body. Now she knew how it felt. Her heart seemed to be beating just as fast, and her shaking legs would not allow her to run.

  "Hesper.” The man, hunched over, clutched his chest with one hand. He reached out with the other. "It’s Joram. Do you . . . do you not recognize me? Do you remember . . . remember m . . . me? It’s been a year.” A thin smile. "I often played with you by that pine.” He collapsed on the ground, losing his hat, and rolled to his back.

  Only then did she identify the features of her older brother, Joram. Her legs loosened, and she ran as if through thick mud. Her childish hands fumbled with the silly gold buttons, and in a fit of frustrated rage, she ripped them off to pull the coat away from his body. Several puncture wounds in his chest put him in grave danger. The bleeding did not seem too bad, yet.

  "Bullets go right through.” Joram gasped, pointing to his injuries. "Right through.”

  Bullets? Her tiny hands could not cover them all. Could she lay her body over them? Sit on them? Something to stop what bleeding there was? Impossible.

  Normally, she refused to accept the title of Little Girl, but she was all too aware of her mere six years now.

  Herbalists and midwives had been training her for only a couple of months, but they had taught her a few things. She now knew about a large patch of yarrow at the northern edge of the woods. Soldier’s woundwort! That would help him! She could never get there and return in time to save him, though.

  Twitching and jerking, Joram grabbed her arm. "Get Papa.”

  Right. Papa. Papa! Her heavy legs wobbled and shook as she ran to the east.
Where was he? Stopped beside her oak, she listened for his hammering. After a few moments, the faint pounding began, filtered through trees and distance. She closed her eyes to hear better. North-east.

  Papa was working on someone’s loft when she found him. Her screams and pleas meant nothing. He would not come, and Mama would not go without Papa’s permission—something he would never give.

  "He is one of them now.” Papa hammered a nail into the loft. "Forget him and make peace with the loss.”

  Hesper knelt and placed her face on the forest floor, coughing on the detritus she inhaled as she wept. If Papa’s feet had been planted on the ground, she would have clasped them with her little hands. Even the use of that desperate custom did not change his mind.

  Joram was off-limits. The Meros were the enemy, having taken the Unified’s country and prosperity and forced them to run for their lives. If someone betrayed the Unified, they did not deserve the safety their people had worked to establish.

  Jaw set, she looked to the north. Joram’s human papa might disown him, but Nature could not disown its own. Yarrow might save him, but going so close to the outside world at her young age might result in severe reprimands and punishment.

  Was it worth it?

  He was probably dead.

  But what if he was not?

  I must do what I can. He would die if she thought only of herself.

  It took all her focus and strength to push her legs through the invisible sludge that made them heavy and slow. Determined to overcome it, she pressed on to the edge of the woods and snatched a handful of white yarrow tufts, which she mashed in her hands as she ran, turning them pink with Joram’s blood.

  When her little legs brought her to his side, he lay in the arms of a bronzed, deer-skinned stranger who spoke soothing words, encouraging Joram to be still. Pale and glistening with sweat, Joram looked past the stranger and gave Hesper a blank-eyed smile before his body quaked and exhaled for the last time. The stranger twisted around to see her. Adahy.