by Brent, Amy
“Okay everyone, welcome,” said Paul. “We're glad you could join us. Today's first lesson will focus on close contact, and if necessary, you can execute this move in self-defense. Please note, these moves can maim or even kill, so please never use them unless there is no other option. The terminology ‘self-defense’ is there for a reason. Please be morally responsible in that regard.”
I watched as Paul went through the moves. He called Ben up to help him, and he looked perfect the way he moved. I was enjoying my view a little too much, especially considering I was supposed to be mad at him.
“Okay, I want you to pair up. The person nearest you is your partner. If you can't find anyone, you'll have to use your imagination. Nah, just kidding. We have even numbers, so there'll be someone for everyone. I always like that joke, though.”
I gave a laugh and found myself paired up with Rocco. He was beefy and wore a kind smile. He obviously worked out because he looked like the Incredible Hulk.
“I hope you'll go easy on me,” I said.
“Of course, I’m a true gentleman, at least that's what my lovely wife tells me.”
I was glad to have a distraction. Watching Ben do self-defense was definitely putting my mind in that naughty place, and I was working, today. Rocco would give me a run for my money.
He smiled at me. “Okay, you try first. Kick; then punch, then hit me in the belly.”
“I might break you,” I said, giving him a wide grin.
“Yes, you might,” he said, pandering to my ego.
I kicked, punched, and then swiped his belly. I only made light contact as Paul had suggested for safety. After I'd finished my moves, Rocco fell to the ground and played dead as I laughed loudly. He laid there with one eye open, and then we swapped; I became the attacker. I enjoyed my time with him, immensely. He was absolutely hilarious, a real BFG—big friendly guy.
I hadn't realized how much fun it would be, learning a life skill in such a beautiful setting. I looked at the others who were also having fun. Some partnerships were a little more serious than Rocco and me, but everyone seemed to be enjoying their time together. Paul drifted around to help the groups, and Ben was partnered up with a fifty-something male recruit. He was giving Ben a real run for his money. He looked as ripped as Ben and had a martial arts kind of attitude.
We broke up our partnership for lunch, and Rocco shook my hand and thanked me for being such a great partner. I gave him a big smile and told him how much fun he’d been. My belly still hurt from his joking around; he'd made me feel exceptionally happy and had encouraged me as well as I’d tried to execute the moves more distinctly. He was a really lovely guy. Ex-Army he’d said and happy to work from home as a self-professed entrepreneur. His wife had been with him since they were both sixteen years old, and they had a daughter and a son. I bet he made a great dad, and his wife was exceptionally lucky.
Before I could think about my choice for lunch, I noticed a woman coming in from the parking lot, walking toward the canteen. It was one that I recognized, an individual that grabbed my attention.
It's Ben's mother.
I felt my body get anxious as I watched her walk ahead, looking for Ben. She was wearing pastel colors and had her hair tied up neatly in a bun. She was as beautiful as ever. She'd always been lovely to me when Ben and I had been dating.
Before I could think of anything more, I saw him, the cutest little boy. He was running behind her holding something made of Legos. It was Ben's little boy. It must have been.
I stood and watched him run to Ben. He dropped his airplane and jumped into Ben's arms, hugging him tightly. It was a smaller version of Ben. He had gorgeous eyes, the same shape, and he had the same dusty hair color in a similar short cropped cut. He was the definition of cuteness.
I sat with Nicole, and the loudness of the canteen ensued. I watched as Ben walked over with his son in his arms, his mother following.
“Hey, Lindsey; hey, Nicole! This is Rita, my mother, and this is Jacob, my son.”
I didn't know how to react. It was clear that Rita recognized me, and she smiled, taking the airplane from Jacob, who was trying to get down.
“I'm four. I'm Jacob.” He ran to his nana and asked for the airplane. “This is my mega jet.”
I smiled at him, and my heart filled as he spoke. He was showing Nicole and me his pride and joy. Nicole said a “Wow,” and I said, “That's so awesome!”
As we spoke he got shy and ran back to his nana. He hid behind Rita's skirt, and I sat in awe of him. I wasn't one to warm to kids in that way, but he was Ben's boy, and my heart skipped beats for him immediately.
I watched as Ben interacted with him. Jacob was playing a peekaboo game with Nana Rita in the middle. Ben was trying to catch him, and when he did, he tickled him. I felt my heart nearly flip as I watched him in his father role; it was a sight I'd only ever imagined in my mind. It was the most beautiful treat I ever saw. I felt raw, and the emotion washed through my core.
“Okay Jacob, we can get some food, and then Nana will take you home.”
“Can I eat ice cream?” he asked.
“Sandwich first.”
“Okay, but just a half one, Dada.”
I watched them walk off, and Rita gave a kind wave. She still looked amazing, and she was exceptionally loving, just like I'd remembered her all those years ago.
Nicole looked at me and did a zip-lip signal, knowing that I wouldn't want to talk about it where we were. It wasn’t the right time. We ate the rest of our lunch in silence, and I felt different, somehow. I literally had no words to describe what I just saw.
Ben as a dad—wow.
Ben
I stopped by at Lindsey's camp. She seemed a little less stressed when she did at self-defense the other day. I knew that I wasn't totally forgiven, and despite the truth of the situation, at least I'd been honest about my feelings. That was something I'd always struggled with in the past, sharing my feelings.
I saw Lindsey and Nicole packing her car up with some things, and she looked in my direction as I got out of my car. She and Nicole picked up a BBQ and seemed to be struggling with it. It was big and bulky.
“Need any help?” I asked, hoping I wouldn't get snapped at or given the silent treatment that I hated so much.
“Yeah, I actually think we might need help. We had a BBQ cookout today.”
I made my way over, and Lindsey joined Nicole's side. We all lifted together, and I managed to maneuver it in without too much trouble.
“Thanks for that,” she said, giving me a half-smile.
“No problem.” I paused, and then my words surprised me as I said them. “I wanted to invite you over to my place for dinner tonight. Mom always has Jacob on Fridays, so would that be alright?”
I watched her face half-light up; I think I'd surprised her as much as I had done myself. I didn't know if it was a great idea or a stupid one. Time would tell, I supposed.
Nicole broke the awkward silence for us. “She'd love to, what time do you want her there?” she asked, giving us both a wide grin.
I smiled. “Um, seven would be perfect.”
“Sure, she'll be there, won't you Lindsey?” asked Nicole, ready to push her into it.
Lindsey bit her bottom lip and smiled. “Sure.”
I felt myself get excited at the thought that she'd accepted, even if Nicole had goaded her somewhat. I wanted to spend time with her, and it just felt—well, to be honest, it felt right.
“Okay, I'll see you in a few hours,” I said, feeling nearly exuberant.
“Yep, see you soon.”
I got into my car and drove away. I was a great cook, and I'd always cooked for Lindsey when we'd dated. Szechuan Chicken that she used to love was going to be the dinner of choice, served with rice and a hint of basil, just to set it off nicely. Dessert would be cheesecake. Mom had put it in my fridge yesterday, so I could serve it with strawberries and fresh cream, which used to be two of Lindsey's other favorite things. My head whirred; I wa
s preparing dinner in my mind before I even got home. I'd wear that nice blue silk shirt I had, topped off with my good faded jeans.
I got home in a flash and prepared the meal. Once it was done, I let it stay in the oven, so it would be warm when Lindsey arrived. We'd enjoy red wine with it, sweet, not dry. Lindsey and I liked many of the same tastes, food and drink-wise.
Before she arrived, I showered and changed. I was clean shaven when I heard a knock at the door. Mom had cleaned up the house for me earlier that day while Jacob was at kindy, may God bless her beautiful soul. It had been great timing. I think I would've run out of time if I’d had to do that, as well.
I opened the door, and I tried not to gasp as I looked at her. She wore a black, figure-hugging dress, with dark stockings and red heels. She smelled of something magical, and her face and hair looked better than divine. She had those gorgeous wispy bits hanging down, and I felt my pheromones dancing as I gazed at her beauty. She looked absolutely stunning. Hot as fuck, to put it bluntly.
“You look amazing,” I said.
“Thanks,” she replied, handing me a potted plant. “I thought it would be a good housewarming gift or something. It's jade.”
“Oh cool.”
We sat down together, and I felt good about the whole situation. I wanted us to get along, and at the very least, I wanted us to be friends.
“I'm so glad you came,” I said, opening the wine.
“Really?” she asked, still feeling a little on guard.
“Yes.”
I poured us both a glass, and we sat and ate together. The meal was one of her favorites, well, it used to be, and I could tell she was impressed by my efforts.
“I kinda wanted to make up for that night at the bar. I think you used to like this chicken dish too, so I hope it's alright.”
She finished her mouthful, and her eyes lit up like beacons as they sparkled in the light, which I'd dimmed before she'd arrived. Watching her eat was like heaven. She looked so delicious, and my dick had been wanting to be with her the whole night long. She was the most delicious thing I could remember ever setting my eyes upon. Ever!
“It's super-yummy. I'd forgotten how good it tasted.”
I knew it wouldn't be right to kiss her, not yet. I cleared the plates, and we sat for a while. I wanted her to understand who I was and what I'd been through, just a little bit more.
I explained how hard it had been joining the Navy SEALs, and about the effort I'd needed to succeed in that. It had consumed me, to the point of wanting to quit at times. But it was the only thing I really had as a goal to aim for because I'd left everything else behind. Paul had said it would toughen me up. He’d joined a few months before me, and he was right.
Lindsey listened intently as I spoke to her, and the glimmer in her beautiful eyes gave me hope that we could maybe get things back to how they were before—somehow. I still didn't know about the whole cheating scenario. I had believed that she'd done it for so long now that it was hard to reason with myself. My subconscious mind thought that it was true, and I'd convinced myself of that fact for longer than I could remember. It was hard to let it go, once and for all. There was still a part of me that believed it was true.
Lindsey knew I hadn't told her the full story. I could sense she had questions about Jacob. I thought it best to tell her about my ex. “When I first began dating her, she seemed kind and caring,” I said.
Lindsey smiled at me, happy she was going to finally hear what had gone on. Her eyes were melting my heart as she sat and gave me her full and undivided attention. I really felt as if I could say anything to her, and she'd understand. She scooped up the cheesecake as I told her more.
“So anyway, she began spending ridiculous amounts of money, shopping at the most expensive places, buying shoes, handbags, you name it. I asked her why she felt the need to spend a grand a month on material things, and she just ignored me. There was hair, nails, spas, and god only knows what else.”
“A grand?”
“Yep, it was a bit much, and then she started putting Jacob into daycare more often and going out all the time with her friends. Turns out she was seeing some guy who had a lot of money. Bradley, he was a total twit who couldn't see past her vagina. Excuse my expression, but that was the truth.”
“Really? She cheated?”
“Yep, and it's six months now that she's been gone. She ran off with him to another state. She hasn't called Jacob, not even once. I only have a forwarding address to send the divorce papers to when I get around to it. She said she'd sign them if I pay for them.”
“God, she sounds—”
I finished her sentence. “Like a narcissistic, cheating, lying, money-hungry, bitch from hell.”
“Yes, you read my mind.”
“Jacob has been adjusting well, considering. I mean, he still asks about her, but we try and change the subject. Mom has been an absolute godsend, helping to look after him. He's made new friends at kindy, and that's helped a great deal.”
Her facial expression changed. “How can a mother not miss her child?” she asked, giving me a look of shock.
“I don't know, but honestly, I think he'll do better without her, in the long run.”
She agreed. “God, it's still harsh, though.”
“Yep, I know. What a weird life it is that gets dished out to us. Go figure.”
“What did you see in her?”
“To be honest, I truly think I was lonely. I needed someone to talk to when I got home. Being in the military can get lonely when you’re not working.”
“I bet. A dog might’ve been a better choice.” We both laughed loudly.
“Paul’s got a dog, a golden retriever.”
We talked for another hour, and we sipped more wine. I turned the heating on to make the place feel cozier. We laughed like old friends who'd missed each other's company on a big scale. And I guess that was true. I had missed talking with her. She made me feel like I could say anything at all and open my heart without the fear of getting hurt.
Wow.
I began second-guessing myself again; the whole cheating debacle wasn't something I wanted to revisit. She'd sworn that she wasn't guilty, and I wanted to believe her so much.
I shifted my thoughts away from that issue and found myself wanting to touch her and take her. She looked so beautiful, sexier than ever. She'd matured into a wonderful woman, a woman that cared about others. And that, in and of itself, was a quality that I truly admired because I also had a passion for doing the same thing.
The wine flowed as the conversation did too. I learned more about what Lindsey did with her life, and she learned more about mine. We made no mention of the past or anything that dredged up horrible memories or heartbreak. It was fun to hear about some of the other people we’d known when we’d dated, and how their lives were panning out. There was Margaret who’d married Frank, an Italian guy who’d teased her in high school. Apparently, they had six kids now and were totally in love with one another. Then there was John and Marty. Marty had dated John in high school, and they both bought the local store a few miles away. They didn’t want kids because they loved to play golf. Golf was their baby.
We laughed about Kimmy who’d done a strip at the local football game; she’d turned out to be a rock chick lesbian who now played in a semi-famous band. We joked about one of our old teachers who got caught with his penis stuck in a vacuum cleaner; apparently, he went to the hospital with it still attached to his member. And then there was Mrs. Beatty. She had the café on Longinton Road. She’d hit her husband on the nose so hard that it broke it. He’d got caught having an affair with Jeremy Eros, a good friend of his wife’s. She also got revenge on Jeremy too, by painting his Jeep with horrible words that denoted him as a man-whore and a cheater. It had not gone down very well with his wife, who’d then filed for divorce.
We laughed for hours about the stupid gossip we spoke of, my belly hurt so bad, and then my gaze went to hers. I couldn’t stop myself from k
issing those sweet and vulnerable lips; her femininity was driving me crazy.
All I wanted to do was take her and have my wicked way. She was the most gorgeous woman I’d ever seen and been with on an intimate level. I felt extremely lucky to be talking with her after all those years had passed by; she could’ve been married with kids when I’d arrived back home.
I leaned in and then the magic happened as our lips touched. It was soft, sensual and raw. I’d never wanted anything more than I did in that very moment.
Fuck, Lindsey, you’re so perfect and beautiful.
Lindsey
A body full of alcohol did a great job of numbing the senses, but, this time it would be very far from numb. I did have a stomach full of apprehension, and how our interaction would be when we both had our wits about us. Could I go through with it, or would I freeze and pull back from Ben? Hell no. I’d come this far, so there was no way I was going to pull back. If sexual chemistry were the fourth of July, there’d be fireworks screaming around the landing toward Ben’s bedroom. My body felt on fire, and it was a culmination of years of sleeping alone in a wasteland of loneliness.
Maybe I should tell him that. God, he looks good tonight.
Ben pushed open the bedroom door. His bed was made, nice and neat, and it looked crisp enough that you could bounce a quarter on the sheets. I stepped inside and heard the click of the catch behind me. I turned to look at Ben; his magnificent body was wrapped in his figure-hugging shirt, and the outline of his muscles became defined by the light which cast a golden glow over him.
He reached for the bottom of his shirt and raised his arms over his head. His muscles rippled, and his abs creased harder while his stomach tensed. His shirt fell from his fingers, and he stepped forward and pulled at the end of his belt with his right hand. The slight rattle of metal filled the bedroom when the buckle jangled. Ben popped the button of his jeans and pinched the waist in his fingers while he slowly yanked down his zipper. His eyes were permanently fixed on mine.
