Lulu's Café

by T. I. Lowe

  Unable to stand her own stench any longer, Gabriella headed for a long, hot shower. She stopped by the washing machine and tossed her top and bra inside. She knew the bloodstains on her panties and pants would be next to impossible to remove, so she added them to the garbage bag.

  As Gabriella numbly went through the routine of straightening her curly hair and applying makeup, the ringing phone broke the silence and startled her. Silence had become a constant companion. She went days without hearing one single word from anyone.

  “Hello?”

  “Yes, Mrs. Sadler? This is Mr. Sadler’s secretary. He asked me to inform you that he will have supper delivered tonight so that you can have the night off.” The secretary seemed pleased to relay the pleasant message.

  “Okay. Thank you.” This was another part of the making-up ritual. At least it wasn’t a new vehicle this time. Gabriella had adored the gifts in the beginning, but as she’d matured over the past ten years, this act only made her feel cheap.

  After hanging up the phone, Gabriella decided to explore the gift box waiting for her attention in the kitchen. She took the luxuriously wrapped box back to the bedroom and sat down on the only comfortable surface in the loft, the bed. Once the silver paper was removed, Gabriella pulled an emerald-colored silk nightgown and matching robe out of the box. The gown was long and elegant, with a built-in bodice. She cringed when she discovered that the size, 18, was correct. Embarrassment coursed through her as she realized Brent had to take such a large piece of lingerie to a counter to be purchased. How dreadful it must have been for him to have a slim, young salesclerk ring up his purchase in none other than a lingerie store. Gabriella was sure the saleslady pitied such a fine-looking man for being stuck with a plus-size wife.

  As she looked at the gown, she believed that Brent had to love her. Why else would anyone choose to be with a fat nobody? What possible reason could he have but love? She re-dressed in the gown and robe, and then she touched up her makeup. Staring at her reflection, she vowed to do her best to please Brent. Surely she could never find a better man than him. Gabriella was in love with Brent, and she needed him. These thoughts, along with other tangled thoughts of trying to stay alive, played through her head in loops.

  She glanced at the clock and realized it was nearly time for Brent to arrive home, so she made her way to the liquor cabinet to prepare his drink. Needing some encouragement, she took two shots of the bourbon and plastered a smile on her face. Soon after, the door opened and Brent sauntered in. She handed him his drink, but he declined it with a rueful shake of his head.

  “I’m trying to cut back.” He wrapped his arms around her softly and nuzzled her neck. “I’ve missed you, baby.”

  Gabriella drank in his affection. She could happily spend a week wrapped in his comforting arms. “I’ve missed you more,” she said against his shoulder.

  “I love this color with your hair.” He held her at arm’s length long enough to inspect her attire before pulling her back into his embrace.

  “Thank you. It’s beautiful.”

  “Only the best for my baby,” he whispered in her ear, sending goose bumps down her body. This man, the one who could beat her down to nothing, could also make her feel like the most important woman in the world. This was the man she fell madly in love with. Although he didn’t visit much, it was more than worth it when he did. He could spellbind her with one look or turn that same face into pure terror.

  Brent pulled Gabriella’s face close and gently kissed her. Tasting the unexpected bourbon on her lips, he pulled away and grinned at her. “You started our party without me? I guess I could have one drink with you.” He smiled wickedly as he reached for the glass.

  Gabriella wished she had not indulged in the alcohol now. She was not a drinker. From her time waitressing in Vegas, as well as witnessing Brent’s drunken rages, she was totally against it. Now, in one weak moment, she was afraid she might have ruined the evening and would have to deal with drunken Brent and not her sweet Brent. He was rarely able to stop with one drink.

  But she was lucky tonight. After his third bourbon, Brent pulled Gabriella toward their bed, where they spent the rest of the night making up for the closet visit. Supper was delivered and later thrown away, untouched.

  Brent took these apology nights seriously. It was as if he thought he could wipe her memory completely clean of his crimes against her. She knew she should stand up to him and demand that they talk about getting him some help. She knew she should file a report against him. She knew it had to stop, but when he loved her, she couldn’t turn the affection away. To feel significant on nights like that was irresistible. She thought this was true love. It felt like true love . . .

  4

  DONUTS . . . DONUTS MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER!

  “It’s a perfect morning for a perfect donut. Welcome to the Donut Diner. May I take your order?” Shayna asked from the drive-thru speaker.

  “You took the words right out of my mouth,” Gabriella responded.

  “Hey, Gabby. The usual?”

  “Yes. But could I change one coffee to a milk?”

  “Sure. Drive around.”

  Gabriella had hoped the large sunglasses would sufficiently hide the bruises and her swollen nose. But apparently not.

  “Oh . . . ,” Shayna muttered after she opened the window. “Wow, Gabby. What happened to you?”

  Gabriella nervously laughed it off as she tried to shield her face with her hair. “I tripped into a stupid table and nearly took my face off in the process.”

  “You’re the clumsiest woman I have ever met. Is your nose broken?” Shayna asked, suspicion creeping into her voice.

  “I don’t think so.” Gabriella handed over the money.

  Shayna passed the box of warm donuts and the coffee through the window. Once Gabriella set those down, Shayna passed the bottle of milk but kept her grip on it. As Gabriella tugged for her to release it, Shayna gave her a knowing look.

  “Does Mr. Sadler know yet?” Shayna asked as she released the milk.

  Before Shayna could continue, Gabriella quickly rolled up the window and drove off.

  On the way to the doctor’s office, she enjoyed half the box of donuts and saved the rest for the way home. She was already nervous, and now she was a bit frazzled with Shayna figuring it out so easily. Gabriella hadn’t had a period since that last extended stay in the closet, a little over two months ago. Her body felt all out of sorts, and she was pretty certain she was pregnant.

  Brent had been relatively good lately, so Gabriella had been starting to feel confident about telling him the news. He had made it very clear from the start there was no room for children in his life plan. She tried to broach the subject three days ago. That led to her busted face and a one-night stay in the closet.

  After her release, Gabriella secretly made the doctor’s appointment. She was too worried to wait for her face to heal before getting checked out. She would have to start her relationship with her new obstetrician with lies. Shayna was good practice, but even she hadn’t bought it. The makeup seemed to be enhancing the swelling and bruising instead of camouflaging it. Gabriella decided she would go Hollywood-style and keep her sunglasses on until she was tucked into an exam room.

  Since it was Thursday, she used her grocery-shopping time for the appointment. Before leaving that morning, she’d made arrangements to have groceries delivered to the loft around one. She’d used the delivery service before when she was down with her ankle. She also set up a post office box before hitting up the donut shop so she could have an address for the medical forms. After her appointment, Gabriella was determined to put together a solid plan to escape Brent. She had to, for the baby’s sake.

  As she pulled up to the medical office, her phone rang at the designated time. “Hello?”

  “Hey, baby. Have you made it to the market yet?” Brent asked.

  “Just pulled up.” She hoped the quiver in her voice didn’t reveal the lie as she stared at the medic
al plaza. “Is there anything else you need?”

  “No. Just checking on you. Are you wearing your new earrings?”

  Gabriella glanced in the rearview mirror and studied the one-carat diamond earrings sparkling on her earlobes.

  “Yes. They’re beautiful. Thank you again.” She tried to sound genuine but knew she fell flat.

  “Have supper ready at seven.” Brent hung up.

  “I hate you,” she whispered into the phone before placing it in her purse.

  Taking a deep breath, Gabriella exited the Range Rover and made her way into the medical suite identified as the office of Dr. Clara A. Simmons, ob-gyn. Ignoring the receptionist’s stare, Gabriella prepared to tackle the medical history forms. Before she could sit down, a nurse ushered her into an available exam room. She was impressed at how fast the place operated. By the time she removed her sunglasses, a tall woman with coffee-colored skin and a funky yet neatly kept Afro entered. The embroidered name on her white coat identified her as the doctor. She met Gabriella’s gaze.

  “I was told we have an emergency. I’m Dr. Simmons.” Her caramel eyes studied Gabriella as she waited for an answer.

  Gabriella, struck by the Southern accent that accompanied the doctor’s words, was momentarily speechless. “No. No emergency. This is just a regular visit.”

  “No?” the doctor asked, her brow puckered. “You sure?”

  “This?” Gabriella indicated her face. “I tripped into a coffee table and nearly took my face off.” She laughed. By the doctor’s expression, she wasn’t buying it any more than Shayna did. “I think I’m pregnant,” she blurted, hoping to get the focus off of her lie.

  “Okay.” Dr. Simmons stepped into the hallway to beckon the nurse. “This is Julie. I believe you already met briefly. Julie, will you please get a blood and urine sample from Mrs. Sadler? Once you get a pregnancy confirmation, set her up in the ultrasound room.”

  “Yes, Dr. Simmons.”

  The nurse led Gabriella to the lab area. Gabriella took a deep breath before she stepped onto the scales and nearly cried when the needle rested on 237 pounds. How had she let herself go that badly?

  After checking her height, temperature, and blood pressure and collecting the necessary samples, the nurse led Gabriella to the ultrasound room, where she instructed her to put on an exam gown and lie down on the table. She offered Gabriella a reassuring smile before she left the room.

  Ten minutes passed in complete quietness before the doctor entered the room. “Congratulations, Mrs. Sadler. You’re pregnant.” She patted Gabriella on the shoulder. While the doctor put on her gloves, she instructed her patient to place her feet in the stirrups and to try to relax. “I’m going to do a vaginal ultrasound since you are in the early stage of your pregnancy.”

  Great. Gabriella shimmied down the table to reach the stirrups. More fun stuff . . .

  Once the dreadful exam was completed and Gabriella had re-dressed, she met the doctor in her office. Seated across the desk from Gabriella, Dr. Simmons began going over all the information.

  “By my calculations, you are approximately ten weeks pregnant. The ultrasound and blood work shows that everything is on a healthy course.” The doctor handed Gabriella the ultrasound pictures and pointed to the white, oddly-shaped spot peeping out of the dark abyss of her uterus. “That small peanut is your little treasure.” The doctor flashed a warm smile.

  Tears trickled down Gabriella’s face as she returned Dr. Simmons’s smile. She could finally celebrate this intimate news with someone, even if it was with a stranger.

  Gabriella allowed herself to briefly pretend . . .

  This newly acquainted woman was actually her lifelong friend. They’d even attended the same college and had been roommates. They were meeting for lunch to plan a backyard barbecue, where they would announce to a yard full of family and friends about their joyful bundles on the way. Of course, they both had doting husbands who were over the moon about the pregnancies and had made it a competition to see who could pamper their pregnant wife the best. This life was perfect, and it was filled with love and family and lots of laughter . . .

  “Gabriella?” Dr. Simmons spoke after she cleared her throat to get Gabriella’s attention.

  As the daydream faded, the reality of sitting in a doctor’s office with a bruised face and an unexpected pregnancy, which she had to keep secret, sank in. Fear and nerves suddenly wiped the smile off her face.

  “Are you okay, Gabriella?”

  “How far along do you have to be when you can no longer get an abortion?” Gabriella asked as she openly wept.

  Her question took the doctor by surprise, but she quickly recovered and pulled a business card from her desk drawer. “If you want to terminate your pregnancy, I can refer you to another doctor.” She tried to pass the card to Gabriella. “I do not perform abortions, but I will respect your choice,” she stated in a very clinical voice.

  Gabriella refused the business card. “No . . . you don’t understand.” She paused before she wrestled with the decision to confide in Dr. Simmons. She focused on her hands folded in her lap. “Is what I share with you confidential?”

  “Absolutely. Patient privacy is a big deal.” The doctor waited patiently for Gabriella to continue.

  “My husband says absolutely no children, so it’s very important for me to keep this a secret until he can no longer do anything about it.” She continued to weep as she fiddled with her wedding ring.

  “Your husband has no right over your body, Gabriella.” Dr. Simmons hesitated and then added, “He also has no right to do that to your face.”

  “I fell into a table. It’s my fault. If I would just learn to do better, these accidents wouldn’t keep happening.” She slumped in her chair, stunned that she had totally screwed up her excuse. She sounded pathetic. She started to retract the statement, but the doctor interrupted her.

  “Look at me, Gabriella,” Dr. Simmons said in a steady voice and waited to continue until Gabriella finally looked up. “No table has the right to do that to you. You can blame it on being clumsy, but you have a baby that you are responsible for now. You have to protect your baby from the table.”

  The only thing Gabriella could do was nod her head in agreement.

  “I’m going to be praying for you.”

  “Oh . . . okay,” Gabriella mumbled.

  “Don’t you believe in God?”

  Gabriella looked away from the doctor’s questioning eyes. “Yes. I’ve just never gotten to know him very well. I bounced around between group and foster homes all of my childhood.” She shrugged. “Mostly the homes didn’t seem to have much faith in him. I’ve only been to church a handful of times.” She clamped her mouth shut, surprised at sharing so much with this stranger.

  The sound of a drawer opening brought Gabriella’s attention back to the doctor. “Well, how about you get to know him.” She produced a Bible and handed it over. “Start with Romans. Jeremiah is one of my favorite books too. My favorite verses are highlighted.”

  “I can’t take your Bible.” Gabriella tried to give it back, but the doctor raised her hands and shook her head.

  “No. It’s yours. Now, tell me, what are you taking for the pain?” Dr. Simmons asked as she studied Gabriella’s face.

  “Regular strength Tylenol. I called a pharmacy to make sure it was okay for the baby.”

  “Very good. The nurse is putting together a packet for you to take home. It will include all the pregnancy dos and don’ts, as well as a book that shows the weekly stages of your growing baby. There is also a month’s worth of prenatal vitamins. If those agree with you, I’ll write you a prescription at your next appointment.”

  Gabriella nodded as she tried to pull herself together.

  “Watch your diet closely. Remember, your baby eats what you eat. If you eat half a dozen donuts, then so will your baby.”

  Gabriella flinched. She wondered if the doctor could smell the donuts on her.

  “Try to stick wit
h lean meats, fresh fruits, and veggies. Also low-fat dairy and whole grains are needed. Let’s try to be mindful of your weight gain throughout the pregnancy. With you already being overweight, we need to be cautious and try to avoid unwanted risks to you and your baby.”

  Gabriella hung her head and fell completely to pieces. Dr. Simmons moved to the vacant chair beside Gabriella and held her hand.

  “Honey, most of my patients are a little overweight. Don’t be embarrassed.” The doctor squeezed her hand. “I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t try to encourage proper health for my mommas and their babies. Right?”

  “Yes. I’m sorry. I’m just having an emotional day,” Gabriella whispered as a headache nudged its way to the surface.

  “Welcome to pregnancy hormones, sweetheart.” Dr. Simmons smiled. “Julie also grabbed you a splint for your broken nose from the plastic surgeon’s office next door. And I’m going to have her give you a dose of Tylenol before you leave. Okay?”

  Gabriella nodded as she watched the doctor stand. “Can I ask you a personal question, Dr. Simmons?” She knew she had taken way too much of the doctor’s time already.

  “Honey, you’ve had to shine me all of your glory God gave you and confide in me about your peculiar troubles with tables. I think you are due a personal question.” Dr. Simmons laughed warmly.

  “Where did your beautiful accent come from?” Gabriella had fallen in love with the rich Southern dialect of the doctor’s words as soon as she first spoke. It sounded like home to her, warm and soothing.