Master of My Heart

by Marissa Honeycutt

  I hold out my other hand and more lights swirl around before diving into my palm and vanishing, absorbed by my body.

  “Sabrina . . .”

  He is calling me again. He wants me. He’s going to take me!

  I hide in a shadow as he looks around. He doesn’t see me! He looks right past me!

  But now he looks angry.

  “I know you’re here, Sabrina,” he says in a low voice, walking around in a large circle. When he walks away from me, I let out a silent sigh. “You can’t help but come here. You’re drawn to it.”

  The lights shimmer around him and I can see his cold eyes searching.

  “I can feel you, Sabrina. You think you’re clever, removing your Immortality from your body? It won’t last, you know. It will return. I didn’t give it to you. It’s in your very being. You may think you’re hiding from me, but I know you’re here. I will find you.”

  He closes his eyes. I feel him searching for me. The lights swirl around me and make me spin. I feel them touching me . . . My body willingly accepts their intrusion, even though my mind knows it’s dangerous.

  “No,” I whisper.

  When I fall to my knees, he hears me. My heart leaps in my chest as our eyes meet. His smile is cold and triumphant as he stalks toward me. I shake my head.

  “No . . .” I scramble back, away from him, but his pace doesn’t change. “NO!” I scream.

  “No!” Sabrina screamed again and forced her eyes open, seeing only darkness. The sparkles were gone. He was gone.

  She held up her hands in front of her face and saw them glowing faintly. My Immortalness.

  The door opened. She looked up to see Jayson standing there. He didn’t walk to her, though. Part of her was relieved. Part of her hurt at his rejection.

  “Are you okay?” he asked.

  She looked back at her hands, which had disappeared into the darkness again. She’d absorbed it. She was Immortal once more. And now he’d find her . . . whoever he was. And Khyan, too. Even worse, this meant she could hurt people again.

  “I’m fine,” she answered in a broken whisper.

  Jayson shifted from foot to foot. She could feel he wanted to come in and comfort her, but he didn’t want to be tempted again. She felt his emotions, his desires, more keenly than she had sensed anyone since she’d used the diamond back home.

  “Go back to bed, Jayson,” she whispered, lying on her side and staring out the window into the darkness. A few moments later, the door closed and she was alone again. As she should be.

  I’m fully myself again. And dangerous.

  *****

  “Do you want to talk about last night?”

  Sabrina looked up at Jayson as he sat down across from her at the kitchen table the next morning. “Last night?”

  He nodded. “You had another nightmare.”

  “It wasn’t a nightmare . . .”

  “Really?” He frowned. “I heard you scream.”

  She blinked and looked down at her cereal. “I’m okay.”

  Jayson reached across the table and put his hand on hers. “I didn’t stay to comfort you because I didn’t want to be tempted, Sabrina. Not because I don’t care.”

  “I know,” she whispered, blinking hard to keep the tears at bay. She did know that.

  He sighed and walked around the table to sit next to her. He wrapped his arms around her. “I’m sorry,” he said, pressing his lips against her temple.

  She shook her head. “It’s not that.” She pulled away and blinked again. “It’s better that you didn’t stay.” She stared at her cereal again.

  “Why? What was your nightmare about?”

  She bit her lip. How could she possibly explain the Immortality seeping back into her body? “Same stuff as usual.”

  “I don’t believe you.”

  She looked up at him. “Why?”

  He raised his eyebrows, brown eyes full of concern. “Because you’re pale and shaking.” He nodded toward her hand. She looked down to see the spoon in her hand trembling, the milk in the bowl rippling.

  She dropped it and pressed her hands together between her knees.

  “What happened?”

  Sabrina faltered on the verge of trying to explain. But how could she explain that she wasn’t totally human? That, if she wanted to, she could read everything he felt right now. She couldn’t read his mind, per se, but she could read his emotions. How would she explain that her ribs were completely healed, even though they ached terribly yesterday? That she could make him have sex with her and he wouldn’t be able to resist in the slightest? That she could make him do anything she wanted him to do? That she might get angry and kill him or anyone else who got in her way?

  Then there was Khyan. He probably sensed her right now and would be here soon to take her back to . . . Where would he take her? Ramon was dead. But he had a brother. Castel. Maybe he’d taken over Ramon’s place. Was he looking for her, too? Had he sent the people to talk to Mr. Baker after she’d disappeared?

  Maybe Khyan would just let her go? Let her be? In the months before Sabrina escaped, he hadn’t even been around much. Maybe he was bored with her and would leave her alone.

  Probably not.

  Then there was the man from her dreams. The one who haunted her sleep. Who was he? Why did he want her? Something inside told her she should know him, know what he wanted from her, but she couldn’t remember anything concrete. Why?

  How could Jayson possibly understand even half of that? She knew he cared about her. She didn’t want to be disgusting in his eyes. But if it was the truth . . . ?

  Why did her life have to be so complicated?

  But she still had her dancing. It was really all she had. She should be content. Life was far better now than the last few years had been.

  “Sabrina?” Jayson rubbed her arm. “You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.” He gave her a sad smile. “I know you’ve been through some really bad stuff, though. I’m here if you ever want to talk.”

  She didn’t respond. What could she say? Would he want to hear the horrible things that happened to her? He wouldn’t look at her the same way if he knew the things she did, the things she enjoyed. They weren’t normal. She was a sick, twisted, perverted whore and murderer.

  “I’m okay,” she whispered, then stood and took her bowl to the sink. She let the mundane task of rinsing it out become her prayer. Let this be my life. Wash away the bad and make my life ready to be filled with normal, healthy things.

  Jayson got up and walked over to her, taking her wet, soapy hand. “Sabrina, I’ll do anything I can to help you. You know that, right?”

  She saw the sincerity in his eyes and heard it in his voice. She wanted to lean up and kiss him, but she knew he wouldn’t like it. And what would happen if she lost control. She’d never forgive herself if she hurt him, like she’d hurt others.

  “I don’t think you can help me.”

  Jayson shrugged. “Doesn’t mean I won’t try. Besides, I know people who could probably help.”

  “I doubt it.” No one could help her. She’d likely hurt them if they tried. Who could possibly stand up to an Immortal if they came around to take her? No one could win against them.

  “Do you want me to ask?”

  She shook her head. “I don’t want anyone to get hurt.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  She didn’t answer him as she hurried to her room to get dressed for class.

  *****

  That afternoon, without even trying, Sabrina found herself hyper-aware of what Jayson felt. Normally, she had to expend energy to read people. She wasn’t certain if it was because Jayson was an open, honest person, or if she was just extra sensitive at the moment. He wasn’t the type to hide his thoughts, and even before she became Immortal again, she coul
d usually tell what he was thinking just by looking at his face and studying his eyes.

  To her surprise, he was quite emotional when he danced. She sensed him not only working out the mechanics of the dance, but also the emotion behind it. She learned from it and tried to match him in her own dancing.

  She could also sense that he liked her, but was doing his best to keep their dancing strictly professional. Even though she remembered how nice it was to have sex with him, she knew she shouldn’t get involved now that she was Immortal again. She didn’t want to hurt anyone. Surprisingly, on a certain level, it helped keep her desires under control. When she realized what was going on, she missed her entrance and they had to start over.

  At the end of rehearsal, Martin stood in front of them. “I honestly am astounded at the improvement between last week and today,” he said, raising his eyebrows. “You were doing excellent, but now . . .” He tilted his head. “You two aren’t sleeping together, are you?”

  Jayson, who had just taken a drink from his water bottle, coughed and choked as Sabrina gasped. “What?” she exclaimed.

  “You two are more in tune with each other today. I thought . . .” Martin frowned, shaking his head. “I apologize, but that usually only happens when there’s been a change in the level of intimacy.”

  Sabrina glanced at Jayson, not knowing what to say. Yes, they had, but not since that first night.

  “We’re not sleeping together,” Jayson choked out, eyes wide. “I swear.” He looked at Sabrina, who nodded. They weren’t. Not anymore.

  “I believe you,” Martin said, a relieved look on his face. “That kind of thing can get messy.”

  “I know.” Jayson shook his head.

  Sabrina frowned, confused, and Martin smiled. “A few years back, I had a couple dancing together. Halfway through the season, they had a big fight and could barely stand to be around each other. I don’t make rules regarding relationships between dancers. I think that’s intruding too much and some work out wonderfully. But I don’t encourage it, either.”

  “He discourages it,” Jayson corrected.

  Martin smiled and gave a small shrug. “Maybe a little.”

  Sabrina didn’t want to upset him in any way and made a mental note to keep away from the guys in the company. But what if he finds out we already did? Would we be in trouble? Jayson had already said he wouldn’t do it again, though, so maybe it would be okay.

  “Well, whatever you two are doing, keep it up and you’ll be the talk of the town on opening night.” Martin beamed and turned to leave the room, then paused and turned back around “Sabrina?”

  She had been about to sit down to change her shoes to go home and stumbled a bit as she tried to change her vertical direction. Martin walked back to her. “Aiden will be here tomorrow afternoon for your first rehearsal.”

  “Okay.” Butterflies skipped around in her stomach. “I hope I don’t disappoint him.”

  Martin smiled. “Keep doing what you’re doing and you’ll be great.” He paused. “Did something happen yesterday?”

  She shook her head. “No. Why?”

  “Your dancing. Something’s different. Different than even yesterday.”

  She bit her lip. Her dream. “My ribs are feeling better.”

  Martin studied her for a long moment. “Maybe that’s it. Well, whatever it is, keep it up. It’s enchanting.”

  Sabrina gave him a tight smile and nodded. “I’ll do my best.”

  He reached out and tapped her nose playfully. “That’s all I ask.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  The next afternoon, music filtered into the hallway as she walked to one of the smaller rooms on the second floor, where she’d been told to meet Martin and Aiden for their first rehearsal.

  She hurried to the studio but stopped in the doorway when she saw Martin talking to a man who could be none other than Aiden Lang. His long, dark hair shimmered and hung loosely around his jawline. Martin demonstrated a pantomime as Aiden’s amber eyes watched intently. When he laughed, his whole face lit up and he got little wrinkles around his eyes. His white t-shirt was loose, but she saw the definition in his arms when he held them up over his head.

  Martin saw her standing in the doorway and motioned her over.

  “Am I late?” she asked nervously, dropping her bag in the corner and pulling her pointe shoes out.

  “Not at all.” Martin smiled. “Aiden arrived early, so we went ahead and started.”

  Aiden turned around and smiled at her. Without meaning to, she opened her mind to read him and felt his desire. His face was friendly and didn’t betray his deeper emotions, but she knew he wanted her.

  She looked down at the floor as she hurried across the room. His gaze disconcerted her. At lunch, she’d decided she would try and act cool when she met him. She didn’t want to seem foolish. But now, looking into his eyes, she felt flustered and nervous.

  “Sabrina, this is Aiden Lang,” Martin introduced. “Aiden, this is Sabrina Mansfield. She’ll be your Clara.”

  She glanced up at Aiden and gave him a small smile. “It’s nice to meet you,” she said softly.

  He smiled at her, his eyes curious. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sabrina. I hope we perform well together.”

  She nodded, looking at the floor.

  Aiden chuckled. “I didn’t think ballet dancers were shy.”

  Martin put his arm around her shoulders. “She only moved to Boston a few weeks ago and is still getting used to all of us.”

  “Hmm. That’s hard.” The sincerity in his voice made her look up at him. He gave her a sympathetic smile. “Moving to a new city can be tough.”

  She nodded as she studied Aiden’s face. There was something off inside him, but she couldn’t figure out if it was good or bad. Being able to read a man’s emotions wasn’t always an advantage, she decided.

  “All right. Shall we?” Martin asked. “Let’s start from the beginning of your entrance, Aiden.”

  *****

  “Now remember, Aiden. You’re creating this dream world for Clara, your dear goddaughter, in the hopes that she’ll bring your nephew home. Make it magical. She’ll jump, and you lift her through the jump.”

  Sabrina still found it strange, having someone so close to her as she danced. She’d gotten used to Jayson over the last couple days, but Aiden was different. He wasn’t a professional dancer, either, so they spent a lot of rehearsal with Martin helping him learn to dance with her. But she found it helpful because she, too, was re-learning to dance with a partner after so many years. Maybe that was why Martin had them starting early. There weren’t a whole lot of acts where they danced together, but they did interact a great deal.

  “Try again, Sabrina,” Martin encouraged.

  Sabrina ran gracefully toward Aiden. He grabbed hold of her waist as she leapt, lifting her higher than she could have gone on her own. He spun her around, then set her down as elegantly as she went up.

  “Good!” Martin exclaimed. The music stopped and he looked between the two of them. “Feel better? More natural?”

  Sabrina nodded.

  “It makes sense, now that I’ve got it,” Aiden said. “We work together to do the lift.”

  “Exactly,” Martin said with a grin. “I know you’ll do fine. We have plenty of time.”

  *****

  Sabrina walked down the stairs, slowing her steps as she looked out the glass doors, seeing darkness beyond. It wasn’t that she was exactly afraid of the dark, but she wasn’t overly fond of walking alone at night. She’d done it a couple times since she’d been here and everything had been fine. But it still spooked her a bit. It felt like someone was watching her the whole time.

  She needed to get a phone. Then she could call Jayson and ask him to come get her. Maybe. She felt silly, being afraid to walk home alone.

  “
Sabrina! Hey, Sabrina.”

  She turned to see Aiden hurrying down the stairs toward her. He stopped when he got to the same step as her.

  “Hey. I was wondering if you had dinner plans tonight.”

  Sabrina stared at him, wondering why he was asking. Yes, she’d sensed his desire for her when she first met him, but he could have anyone he wanted. She’d seen him flirting with Audrey and Mya when they rehearsed with the Mirlitons earlier in the afternoon. Audrey had flirted back shamelessly, and he appeared to be very interested in her.

  “I was probably going to eat,” she replied cautiously, then mentally kicked herself as she realized how silly her response was. Of course she had plans to eat!

  Aiden grinned. His smile was rather entrancing. She could see why women liked him. He was charming, nice, and confident, bordering on egotistical. “Eating is a good thing, especially after rehearsal.” He chuckled. “Would you be interested in eating dinner with me?”

  “I should probably just get home,” she said slowly, glancing out the door once more. “It’s been a long day.”

  He nodded. “I can understand that.” He glanced out the door. “Can I at least give you a ride home? It’s late.”

  Sabrina chewed her lip, tempted by the offer. Then she wouldn’t have to walk home alone. “Okay,” she reluctantly agreed.

  Aiden smiled again. “Let’s go.” He led her toward the back of the studio.

  “Where are we going?” she asked nervously. She’d never been back here.

  “The parking lot. My car’s back there.”

  “Oh!” she exclaimed, relieved.

  Aiden laughed “Did you think I was going to kidnap you or something?”

  “I suppose that’s kind of a stupid thing to be afraid of, huh?”

  He opened the door and put his hand on her back to guide her across the lot to a sleek, black sports car. “Yeah. I think I’m too well known to be able to kidnap someone and get away with it.” He opened the car door and she got in. Aiden walked around the front, got in, and started the car. “Where do you live?”

  Sabrina gave him the address, which he typed into the GPS on the dashboard. “Ah, not too far.”