Under My Skin

by Shawntelle Madison

  He laughed. “You still believe in the human race. I like that about you. But that’s not the way the real world works. If you had the chance to live forever, to keep all your money and continue to be young and wealthy for the rest of your life, would you be willing to keep a dark secret?”

  I heard the hum of the ship. We’d reached the pickup point.

  He asked me one final question. “Have you met a Guild member yet who had regrets?”

  I didn’t answer him while we boarded the transport ship. Quinn helped me settle into my seat. At first, I was alone, but he returned soon enough at my side.

  “Do you need anything?” he whispered in my ear.

  A shiver passed through me. If he only knew.

  He took my hand, intertwining my fingers with his. As much as I wanted to ask what was going on between us the past few days, I didn’t want to ruin it. Was I his girlfriend? What kind of relationship did we have?

  “You don’t have to hold my hand if you don’t want to do it,” I murmured. The blindfold had given me a bit of courage I hadn’t had before. Looking into someone else’s eyes at a time like this tended to make it all the more difficult to reveal your soul.

  “We’re not at the compound,” he said. “No prying eyes.”

  He was looking at me. He had to be. My stomach quaked. Every nerve ending jumped and fired wildly.

  “I’m just saying if you don’t like me—” I began.

  “Do you remember the day when you met Lieutenant Kelping for the first time?” he interjected.

  “Yes,” I whispered. So much had changed since then.

  “That was when I saw a fire in you for the first time. The spark of rebellion.” He brought my fingertips up to his mouth. I sensed his smile, warm and comforting. “That was when I began to fall for you.”

  My heart jumped into my throat and collapsed back down again. I tried to let go of his hand and draw mine back to my mouth, but he wouldn’t let me.

  “Don’t. I’m looking at you right now and you’re perfect. Don’t you dare cover up what I’m about to kiss.”

  He didn’t even give me a chance to anticipate what was coming. It just happened. He lightly kissed my forehead, his lips warming my skin. His mouth slowly trailed down the bridge of my nose to my lips. A brief brush of his lips against mine became something more as our heads tilted and he drew me closer. I leaned against him and reveled in the exquisite intensity of the moment.

  By the time we parted, I was breathless. All this time I’d forgotten I wore a blindfold. My hand reached up again to touch my lips, but he stopped me.

  “I’m still staring. Don’t even think about it,” he whispered.

  My hands formed a pool in my lap and I fought a flash of shyness. My mom was right about the third response when someone was staring. There are countless reasons why people stare, Tate. Choose one of three responses I taught you and you’ll be fine. The third one is the most important.

  So I sat and enjoyed the ride, not moving an inch.

  When someone loves you, they stare because they only see what makes you beautiful. So look back at them with the same feelings they have for you.

  I had a blindfold over my eyes, but, for once, I could truly see Quinn. I didn’t need eyesight to know he cared for me, that we belonged to each other.

  The ride to reach the headquarters of the Resistance was too brief.

  The whole place was abuzz with activity. Men and women hauled and opened boxes from the storage rooms. People at comm-consoles held heavy discussions. What were they planning?

  Quinn didn’t pause long for me to see much, but through one hallway, in particular, we passed a group hunched over a comm-console. One of them with dark brown hair glanced up. He had to be around my age, maybe a bit older. Everyone wore the same navy blue uniforms, but he stood out with eyes so light blue, they were almost white. Our gazes locked, and I stared at him until we disappeared around a corner.

  My first stop was the infirmary for another shot. Felicity immediately checked me. “Does she have the Lund Bracelet on?”

  Quinn nodded and I rubbed at the vibrating bracelet they’d placed on my wrist this time. Just seeing that metal ring again made me shudder.

  After my shot, they took me back to the conference room. A metallic box sat the edge of the long table. It was about two feet square by six inches with black cables extending from the side onto the table. Each cable had what appeared to be rubber suction cups on the end.

  “What is that?” I murmured.

  “Your lesson,” Quinn said. “Have a seat.”

  I took a seat on the other side of the table, away from the box. Quinn laughed and wheeled my chair over to the box. “Good try, Tate. You know it’s here for you.”

  I gave a short laugh. “Do I have to be enthusiastic about it?”

  He took a seat across from me, close enough for our knees to bump against each other. Carefully, he attached the plugs to my forehead, the sides of my head, and my back.

  “What does it do?” I whispered. On the front, near the bottom, I spotted engraved letters: Property of Gerald D. Hastings, Esquire. “Did that box belong to someone from the Guild?”

  “Yes, and now the Resistance uses it to train people just like it trains the Guild.”

  “How?”

  “Be quiet. I need to calibrate this thing.” From the compu-tablet attached to the box, Quinn did some things and eventually the box came to life.

  “Is something supposed to happen?”

  From behind me, I heard Felicity ask, “Is she always like this?”

  I opened my mouth for a reply, but Quinn spoke. “What you need to do in order to free yourself is to understand how the Guild works. How they see their potential victims. What does it feel like to sense another soul—to brush against them and gauge how easy it would be for you to take over.” He paused to make sure I was paying attention. “This is important. You must understand how he sees you in order for you to fight against him. Do you remember when you took the test?”

  I nodded.

  “They touched you. Matter of fact, you should remember a lot of folks holding your hand, that kind of thing.” Quinn reached for my hand and took it. “When they touch you, they’re using a technique to read your brain waves. They’re searching for a particular signal.”

  My forehead wrinkled up.

  “Brain waves are the electrical signals in the cerebral cortex—the outer part of your brain—that are only detectable by certain machinery. As human beings, we can’t read these signals. But by using this box here, we can be taught how to detect them. I just need to alter the way your body reacts to other magnetic fields. In particular, the magnetic fields present in the human body.” He tapped a few times on the compu-tablet and checked the plugs on my head. “This should feel weird, but it’s important for you to pay attention to what you sense. It might not be something you see, taste, or hear. But for the right person, you’ll notice the difference.”

  He reached for me and brushed his hand against mine. A spark jumped between us.

  “What was that?”

  “Your senses should be heightened right now. Do you feel it?” He grabbed my hand. And then I felt it. I suddenly saw the vast expanse of a million stars through a distance as far as I could see. I felt an erratic soft pulse that vibrated my ears. And within the center of all this, a single entity occupied this space. I sensed it. I recognized its warmth and longed for it. It was Quinn’s mind. Before I had a chance to reach out to the presence within him, he let go of my hand.

  I sighed softly as he chuckled. The sensation remained with me and I longed to take his hand again. To revel in its comfort.

  “Time to show you the other side of the coin,” Quinn said.

  Felicity stepped forward and took my hand next. I expected another rush of sensations. But there was nothing. I held her hand and felt the softness and warmth of her skin but nothing more.

  Felicity gestured for one of the guards to take my hand. I
felt a slight buzz but far weaker. Another man was empty like Felicity.

  “Why does everyone feel different?” I asked.

  “You’re sensing how open they are to becoming a host. This machine amplifies the signal.”

  I itched to take Quinn’s hand again, but I stayed focused on the discussion at hand. “So it teaches the Guild to figure out if they want to bid on a particular person.”

  “Exactly,” Felicity said with a frown. “The better trained the Guild member, the more likely they are to pick someone to fit their consciousness. Based on the age of the victims we see at the auctions nowadays, the optimal signals come a few years after puberty.”

  “It’s important you remember how this feels.” He took my hand again. The sensation was weaker than before.

  “Why does it feel different now?”

  “Training from the box can only be done every so often,” Felicity said. “We’ve found that prolonged exposure affects the systems in the body. Our first testers suffered from brain bleeds—strokes. One ride per customer.”

  I released Quinn’s hand and stared at the box. So the Guild became what they were, using this device, a metallic box with wires that somehow gave them the key to immortality.

  “How does it work?” I asked.

  Felicity shrugged. “We don’t know really. It doesn’t draw a lot of power. The Guild member we took it from had had it for a long time, most likely acquired from another member.”

  I had so many questions and such limited time. “So if I understand how to bring another soul into my body, how do I kick one out?”

  Quinn glanced from Felicity to me. “You don’t kick them out. You do to them what they plan to do to you all along. You absorb them and bury them forever.”

  I couldn’t help thinking about Quinn’s words as they gave me a tour of the labs. In order to free myself, I had to take over my own body. In some ways, it made sense. In other ways, it frightened me. To takeover meant I’d have to kill General Dagon. Naturally, this didn’t sit well with me. I’d been taught to respect life. Maybe I’d hoped for an easier way out.

  All the tech the Resistance had gathered had been stored in a laboratory on the lower levels of the underground camp. A few more of the metallic boxes had been stacked in corners along with other devices I didn’t recognize.

  Felicity pointed out items of interest. “We’ve accumulated a lot of information over the past one hundred years. A lot of lives were sacrificed, but progress has been made.”

  A set of Vorhees Units, in various pieces, sat on a table. “What about those? Do you know anything about how they work?”

  “Based on our successful hacking attempts on the network, we do have some intel on those. The Vorhees Unit is actually based on a pre-Guild project conducted by the military hundreds of years ago. From what I’ve read, the military back then amped up their medical research when the plagues hit. A lot of their research was based on finding cures. During the process, they uncovered a way to harness the mind control abilities of a parasitic fungus that infected insects.”

  “A fungus?” I asked.

  Quinn chuckled. “Not exactly. They most likely applied it using viruses. At the time, the military was quite curious as to how the fungus controlled the ants. In its simplest form, the fungus made chemical changes to the brain. Those changes allowed it to make the ant do what the fungus wanted it to do so it could multiply. The process, in the end, killed the insect.”

  I imagined the process and made a face. “That’s disgusting.”

  Thoughts gathered in my mind: the offering at the well to prepare us for our “patrons,” the Vorhees Unit attached to my neck, and the touch from the Guild member to “gauge” me for a proper placement. All of this had been in place for so long. What chance did someone like me have to free myself and have a real life?

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  A quick trip to the bathroom meant a security detail also. Initially, I was more mortified than the two female security guards were at the prospects of following me into the small room. They glanced away for privacy, but it was still awkward. I could’ve protested but even I wouldn’t have trusted myself alone. The General was conniving and manipulative. Based on what I’ve read about him and what I’ve seen, I could imagine what he’d do to these people. He’d attack my guards. With their weapons in his hands, he’d wreak havoc in this place, even with handcuffs on.

  While I used the cleanse unit, fear cut into me, but not the kind when the General came. It was the fear of knowing that at any moment, he could wake up. He’d take over, and maybe, just maybe, this might be the last time I was awake. Even worse, I might die. Would my soul go to heaven while my body remained alive on Earth?

  “You okay?” one of the guards touched my shoulder.

  I glanced at her. I’d stood in front of the cleanse unit a little too long. My hands had become quite hot.

  I nodded and managed to offer a small smile. “I’d be better if I could get rid of the guy swimming around in my head.”

  She frowned. “Is he awake right now?”

  “Oh, no. Still asleep. And I want him to stay that way.”

  On the way back to the conference room, someone waited for me in the hallway. It was the boy I’d seen earlier, the one with the light blue eyes.

  He blocked my path to keep me from walking by. “You look exactly like she described you.”

  “Excuse me?” Even my guards were taken aback.

  “Don’t worry,” he told them, “I won’t keep you long.”

  He stood at least a good foot taller than me, but he bent his head over to smile, a nice one at that. “You’re Tate. I know your cousin, Zoe.”

  I tilted my head, hoping this wasn’t some kind of cruel joke. “How do you know her?”

  “I’m Tyson Caldwell. I work for Justina Helmquest in New Amesbury.”

  Part of me wanted to be reserved with him, but I couldn’t contain my excitement. “Is she okay? Is she...”

  “She’s still alive. Zoe’s a fighter. I’ll give her that.”

  My thoughts immediately went to the pink disk and her last message.

  He continued. “Justina doesn’t trust her household staff, so it’s been almost impossible for me to contact Zoe. I’ve worked as a member of her staff for over two years now and she wasn’t kind to the last body she acquired. Each one is merely a plaything until she gets bored and finds the next one.”

  We appeared to dance around each other for a moment, unable to think of what to say. Until a question came to mind. “What did she say about me?” I asked.

  He laughed softly. “That you have a good heart. I can see that.”

  “Does my good heart include my Lund Bracelet and matching handcuffs?”

  He shrugged. “From what I’ve heard, General Dagon isn’t someone to tangle with.”

  “That’s true. How is she really?”

  He paused for a moment while a group passed us in the hall. My time was running out. Soon Felicity would come looking for me.

  “She’s trying, but it’s a battle with Justina. I expect Zoe to...you know...lose the fight soon.”

  “How soon?”

  “Maybe a week. Hopefully two.”

  So little time. Alphonse bragged about how he’d done it in a few days. Des had told me a month for some. But the end result was always the same. The host mind lost the fight.

  But if I had a chance, couldn’t Zoe? “What if you got Zoe the antivirus?”

  “I don’t know if she’d trust me to take it.”

  “What if I told you to tell her something so she would trust you? Would you do it then?”

  “Sure.”

  I thought quickly. I saw Quinn coming down the hall. He might not approve of my idea. I told Tyson about the pink disk and the messages she’d sent me.

  “The messages are only one-way, but at least she’d been able to tell me that she was okay.” Quinn reached my side and glanced back and forth between the two of us. “She’ll need he
lp to fight Justina, and I hope that if we work together, we can do something.”

  “I’m willing to try. She said you’re the only family she has around here, and I’m inclined to believe you’ll do what you can on your end.”

  Quinn’s eyebrows went up. “You’ll do what?”

  I introduced Tyson to Quinn. Apparently, they hadn’t met before. “We need him to relay a message to Zoe that I’m still fighting the General.”

  “How long have you been with the Resistance?” Quinn asked.

  “For a year or two.”

  “The name Caldwell sounds familiar.”

  “My parents were both into medical research. My father was a double agent. He developed chemicals for the Guild while he worked for the Resistance on the side. Well, he did until he disappeared.”

  “I’m sorry about that,” Quinn murmured.

  All three of us looked at each other. Unsure what to say. Quinn broke the silence. “Our time’s running out. We can’t gamble like this, keeping you here when the General could wake up at any time.”

  I nodded. I wanted to speak with Tyson more about Zoe’s life. What was it like at her home in New Amesbury? Did Justina treat her in the cruel manner the General did to me?

  “Is there some way I could keep in contact with you?” I asked Tyson.

  “It isn’t safe,” Quinn said. “I’ll talk to Felicity and see what can be done.”

  Quinn was right. I gambled every time I came here. Opening lines of communication around the General wasn’t safe without planning out the logistics.

  He must have sensed my apprehension. “Don’t worry. Felicity will help us make arrangements for Zoe’s rescue and I’ll relay the information to you. She will make sure Tyson is notified.”

  I nodded. Giving up control to the Resistance was for the best.

  With our conversation over, I parted ways with Tyson. I didn’t look back as I walked away, but I sensed his eyes on my back.

  The flight back to the estate was silent. Quinn sat next to me, but not as close. He seemed lost in his own thoughts. I wished I could see his face.