Missy DeMeanor Cozy Mysteries Boxset

by Brianna Bates

  “When did she go back?” Noreen asked.

  “Guys,” Missy said. “Let’s just drop it.”

  She said the words, but truthfully she wanted to hear what Brett had heard. Had Tyler and his wife finally called it quits for good?

  “You know what I know,” Brett said.

  Noreen cocked her head to look at Missy. “All the more reason to give him a call.”

  “All the more reason not to.” Missy shook her head. “I can’t call him five minutes after he’s broken up with his wife.”

  “It hasn’t been five minutes,” Noreen said. “It’s at least been a day if Brett heard it last night.”

  Missy rolled her eyes. “That’s not the point. I’d feel like a…vulture. Like I’ve just been waiting for their relationship to die.”

  “Haven’t you?” Noreen said, playfully.

  This time Missy didn’t hesitate and threw the book at her. It smacked Noreen on the shoulder, bouncing harmlessly off her and settling on the floor.

  “Missy!” Brett said. “That’s inventory.”

  “I’ll gladly pay you the dollar-fifty,” Missy said. “It was sooooo worth it.”

  Noreen was unfazed and laughing so hard her face was turning red. “Miss, you have the perfect excuse to call him—he can get the details on Karen’s…”

  Missy watched her carefully. Noreen obviously couldn’t think of the appropriate euphemism.

  “You know,” Noreen said, the laughter suddenly drying up.

  “Death,” Missy said. She felt the emotions welling up inside, about to overwhelm her.

  Without breaking stride, Noreen came over and hugged Missy. Brett started to come around the desk to join in for a group hug, but Noreen held out a finger.

  “Ladies only, Brett.”

  Missy was crying but found the moment within a moment hilarious. Brett was almost twenty years older than them but had long made his affection for Noreen well-known. He’d been trying to seize on the opportunity to give Noreen a hug, not Missy.

  “One of these days, Noreen. You’ll see the error of your ways.”

  ***

  Noreen knocked off at four. Given how slow it had been, Brett slipped out to grab an early dinner at the pizzeria down the road.

  “Can I bring you anything back?” he asked.

  Pizza sounded delicious. It was also Missy’s worst food in terms of putting on the pounds. One slice could do serious damage. She’d probably wake up tomorrow morning five pounds heavier. It was five pounds she couldn’t afford. Her black dress, the only appropriate outfit she had for a funeral, was already too tight.

  “I’m not asking you to solve an equation,” Brett said, because she was taking too long to answer.

  “Do they have salad there?”

  “It’s a pizzeria.”

  “Guess not, then,” Missy said. “Nothing for me, thanks, Brett.”

  He went out, leaving her alone in the store. She spent the next half hour trying to finish the romance novel. It was a good story, she found herself really rooting for the characters to get together by the end, and even though she didn’t have much left to read, she just couldn’t concentrate. Every time the male lead spoke or did something, she found herself picturing Tyler in her mind. From there, it wasn’t a stretch to imagine she was the female lead…

  “Stop,” she told herself, purposely putting the book down. “You made up your mind to get over him. So get over him. There’s nothing between you anymore.”

  But that little voice in the back of her mind reminded her Tyler might be able to get her more information about Karen’s death. That was really the only reason she was going to call him, wasn’t it? Her childhood friend had died pretty horribly and she just wanted to know why.

  Missy tried going back to the book to distract herself, but she couldn’t focus. Finally, she relented.

  She had his cell phone saved under the contacts in her phone. But the last time she’d used it, his wife had given her an earful, ordering her instead to contact her husband at the office if she needed to discuss “police business.” In other words, the woman had basically accused her of interfering in their relationship, if not downright cheating. Missy didn’t care for Tyler’s wife, but she had to respect the woman’s wishes. Especially if she didn’t want to look like a homewrecker.

  Missy had to go on Brett’s laptop to find the number for the station. She hoped Tyler was working.

  A woman’s voice answered. “Grove City Police, how may I help you?”

  “Hi, this is Missy DeMeanor. I was trying to get in contact with Ty—Detective Brock, I mean.”

  “What is the nature of your call?” the woman asked. Missy could hear her clacking away on her keyboard, no doubt logging this phone call in the computer system.

  Missy almost said Personal but wisely thought better of it. But at the same time, she didn’t want to tell this woman exactly why she was calling. If Tyler was going to call in a favor with a cop in Templeton, he’d probably want that information kept private.

  “It’s about a recent death,” Missy said. “He told me to contact him at the office if I had any questions.”

  It was a total lie. Tyler had never said anything of the sort, and in fact she hadn’t spoken to him in three months.

  “I see.” The woman was skeptical. “Please hold.”

  Missy heard the click while the woman put her on hold. There was no On Hold elevator music, just silence. Missy was beginning to think this was a mistake. If Tyler’s wife had just left town and Missy was calling in only a couple days later with a suspicious story, it wouldn’t look good for him.

  But she’d already gone down this path. It would look even stranger if she hung up now before Tyler could get on or the woman came back. She had to stick it out.

  There was a click. “Hello, Melissa.”

  Tyler’s rich baritone was short and clipped. There wasn’t much warmth in it tonight. She loved how he called her Melissa, though. It had been one of his things, refusing to call her by her nickname like everybody else. He’d explained that he preferred her full name because she wasn’t a nickname kind of girl, she was special. His words had melted her heart in high school, and all these years later still had a similar effect.

  “Tyler, I’m sorry to bother you at the office.”

  “It’s okay,” he said quickly, as if trying to speed the conversation up. “What’s going on?”

  She wanted to ask about his wife, but knew that was the one thing she couldn’t ask about. “I’m guessing you heard about Karen…” Missy couldn’t bring herself to say dying or passing away. She just couldn’t.

  His voice grew a little softer. “I was real sorry to hear about that. How are you holding up?”

  Missy was almost in tears again. “Okay.”

  “I never knew her that well, but she was a nice person. She must have been if you two were close.”

  Missy beamed at the compliment. “Thanks. It was awful finding her in the bathroom.”

  Tyler said nothing. He was back to being the chief detective, as opposed to her high school sweetheart.

  Missy went on. “The detective in Templeton, Paul Johnson, maybe you know him?”

  “PJ? Sure do.”

  Missy breathed a sigh of relief. At least they knew each other. Now for the hard part. “He told me that Karen died of an infection.”

  She let that hang for a moment to see how he’d react.

  Tyler let the silence stretch. “Is that so?”

  Missy had been hoping for a little more interest on his part. “Yes, but that’s all he’s telling me. Just that she died of an infection.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  Missy waited again for Tyler to jump in and offer to help. But he didn’t.

  Missy sighed. “I guess why I’m calling is…”

  “You want me to pull some strings, call in a favor, and get information out of PJ?”

  Missy grimaced. When he put it that way, it sounded like she was asking him to do
something inappropriate. Which she kind of was.

  “Forget it,” Missy said. “I shouldn’t have even called.”

  Tyler said nothing. At least he didn’t hang up.

  Missy felt the tears spilling down her cheeks but she managed to talk through them. “Karen was a really good friend. My best friend after Noreen. I just want to understand what happened. She told me that night she hadn’t been sick, but then she was coughing and later she told me she’d had diarrhea for a week…”

  Missy was rambling, unsure what to say and now audibly crying.

  Finally, Tyler spoke. “Missy, I’m sorry to hear about your friend. But there’s really nothing I can do to help you here. I can’t interfere in that investigation.”

  “There is no investigation,” Missy said. “She’s dead of an infection.”

  “The case belongs to PJ and Templeton. I’m sorry. Now was there anything else?”

  Why are you being so cold? she wanted to ask, but didn’t.

  “I understand,” Missy said. “Goodbye, Tyler.”

  She hated how the last phrase had sounded so final, like they would never talk again. But maybe that was a good thing. She wanted to move on. She needed to move on.

  ***

  Missy got home at six, fed her dog Cody, took a quick body shower, and changed into the black dress. It was really too tight, and Missy realized she’d tried it on in the morning, when like every other human being she was at her most slender. It was quite a feat of acrobatics to get into the dress. She couldn’t get the zipper all the way up in the back and when Noreen showed up at her door, she asked her friend to help with the last few inches. Noreen was wearing a black dress also that stopped a few inches above her knees. As always, she looked devastatingly hot.

  Missy’s dress had spaghetti straps, so she wrapped a black shawl around her shoulders. Despite the heat, she didn’t want to show up at a viewing with her ta-tas in full, plain view. She said goodbye to Cody and gave the dog a couple doggy biscuits, her way of compensation for being out of the house all day and leaving Cody alone.

  Then they were on the road in Missy’s old truck, the one she’d inherited from her father.

  “Missy,” Noreen said. “There’s dog hair all over this seat. My dress is going to look awful.”

  “No one will notice.”

  “Every guy in the parlor will notice because it will be all over my butt.”

  “Wow, modest much?”

  Noreen shook her head. “I don’t have any boobs, so they’ve got nothing else to look at.”

  Both women were laughing.

  Noreen said, “You’re lucky. It must be cool to have a guy check out your boobs. I wouldn’t know what that was like.”

  Missy groaned. “Oh yeah, it’s real cool when you’re talking to a man and he can’t keep his eyes on your face. Really cool.”

  “First world problems,” Noreen said.

  They were both laughing and Noreen cranked the radio that somehow miraculously still worked. They sang along to some Top 40.

  The funeral parlor was over in Templeton so it took them almost thirty minutes to get there. The parking lot was filled to the brim and the nearest spot was about a million miles away. The funeral parlor was a converted two story house, and she figured the director probably lived on the second floor.

  Missy and Noreen headed inside. As Missy walked up the front steps she came face to face with Connie on the porch under the awning. The tall, blonde woman wore a floral dress and looked really pretty. She was working on a cigarette and almost smiled when she saw Missy.

  “Hi, Connie.” Missy stopped a few feet short. She didn’t really want to talk to the woman, but it was a funeral after all. And judging by Connie’s wet cheeks, she’d been crying a few minutes ago. She hurt, just like Missy hurt. The right thing to do would be to commiserate. Missy took a deep breath, reminding herself that Connie had been friends with Karen as well. “This is my friend Noreen.”

  Connie looked Noreen up and down, her eyes lingering oddly on Noreen’s chest. If Missy didn’t know any better, she would have thought Connie had just checked her friend out.

  “Nice to meet you, Noreen.” Connie offered her hand and the two women shook. Then, before Missy could fathom what was happening, Connie had stepped forward and hugged her with her whole body, like they were good friends going back forever. Missy hugged the woman back. When they pulled away, they both smiled at each other.

  “Spanx?” they both asked.

  Then they were both laughing pretty hard, despite the occasion. Connie stubbed out her cigarette and deposited it in the disposal unit.

  Missy said, “Spanx are God’s gift to the big and beautiful.”

  “That they are,” Connie agreed. “It’s good to see you.”

  “Likewise,” Missy said, feeling more comfortable around her.

  “I just can’t believe it,” Connie said. “She was so young…”

  Missy didn’t know whether she was allowed to share what scant details PJ had given her, but she didn’t care. “An infection.”

  Connie shook her head but didn’t react that much. She’d already known. “It doesn’t make any sense.”

  Missy nodded. Now that they had talked for a few minutes, Missy figured she could politely excuse herself.

  “Well, we’re going to head inside.”

  “I’ll come with you.”

  ***

  The line to Karen’s casket stretched all the way back to the front door. Missy, Noreen, and Connie queued up. They made small talk and Missy did her best to include Connie, but the woman had gone quiet and gave mostly one word answers and polite smiles.

  “Who is that?” Noreen nodded in the direction of a side room where some women had congregated.

  Missy peered inside and groaned. “Oh God. That’s Abella.”

  The attorney that had worked with Karen at the firm was holding court, telling all the other women present some story. They listened with rapt attention. Missy could just make out what she was saying. Abella was talking about one of her cases that had actually gone to trial and how she had outwitted opposing counsel by pretending to be a dumb blond and purposely bumbling a discovery request that resulted in a harmless error…Missy didn’t begin to understand what she was saying, but the women in the room were impressed.

  “You know her?” Noreen asked.

  Missy shook her head. “I just met her two nights ago. She’s an attorney at the firm Karen worked at.”

  “So I gathered. She’s mentioned her job title about five times in the last minute.”

  Missy peered around the room and saw the other women who’d been with Abella at the Diet Club. With them hanging on, it seemed like Abella had an entourage. The attorney came to the end of her story and the other women beamed. Missy got the sense they would have clapped if they hadn’t been inside a funeral parlor.

  Abella noticed Missy looking into the room. “Hello there, Muffy.”

  “It’s Missy,” she said, then decided to throw it right back at the attorney. “How are you, Abba?”

  “Abella.” She held that fake smile in place but her eyes were cold. “Good to see you again, under the circumstances.”

  Missy nodded but couldn’t bring herself to trot out some tired cliché. She couldn’t pretend to like this woman.

  The attorney stepped out of the room, her entourage in tow. “We’re headed out, Missy, but I was just wondering if you had heard what happened to your friend.”

  Missy arched her eyebrows. “I did.”

  Abella pursed her lips. “An infection, just awful.” She shook her head very dramatically. “She really should have taken better care of herself, don’t you think?”

  “I think we’re at a funeral.” Missy’s anger was rising. “And I think it’s very rude to speak ill of the dead.”

  “What did I say?” Abella said. “Just that she needed to take better care of herself? We all do.”

  Missy had had it with this chick. The line move
d up, but Missy stayed put and turned to face the attorney.

  “Why don’t you get out of here?”

  Abella pretended to be offended. “Now, Missy, I understand how upset you are, but that’s not really—”

  “Shut up,” Missy said. “Shut up. You didn’t even like Karen. I was around you two for all of five seconds and I could tell right away. The only reason you came was because you worked with her and felt compelled to show your plastic surgeried face so your colleagues couldn’t call you a heartless bitch behind your back.”

  The quiet conversation in the foyer dried up. Missy felt everybody watching her.

  Abella’s smile had turned dangerous. “Be careful, woman. I’m an attorney and my reputation is very important to me. Anybody that damages it with bald-faced lies like that might end up getting served with lawsuit for slander.”

  Missy’s face was on fire. “Yeah, I figured you’d hide behind the law.”

  Abella’s smile finally broke. She kept her eyes on Missy but addressed her friends. “Come on, girls, let’s get out of here. Obviously, not all of Karen’s friends had class.”

  She turned on her heel and marched out, her hangers-on in tow.

  It took ten seconds for the hum of conversation to pick up again. Missy moved up with the line. Noreen nudged her shoulder.

  “Wow.”

  “In case you couldn’t tell, I really don’t like that woman.”

  “I’ll say.”

  Connie leaned in. “Karen didn’t like her either. You should have heard some of the horror stories. She tried to get Karen fired a few times, wrongfully of course.”

  Missy believed it. That woman was vicious so Missy wouldn’t have been surprised to learn she was a back-stabber.

  They moved forward with the line. Eventually they crossed the threshold between the foyer and the viewing room.

  “Look, it’s you,” Noreen said.

  Missy didn’t know what her friend was talking about, but then she saw the displays set up in the front of the room. Old photos decorated the first one, mostly pictures of Karen when she was younger. Missy spotted herself in a few of them.

  “I never knew she had these…” Missy said, pouring over them. In one, Karen and she were sitting in Missy’s old bedroom at home playing with dolls. Both girls had their hair up in pig tails and were squealing with delight.