Beau jerked up, staring back at him, and Ethan had to smile. “Whatever you want,” Ethan said softly, calming himself with deep breaths. “Do it. Just don’t make me come yet. I need to feel your touch, your mouth, your hands. All over me. All night.”
Beau kneeled once again, sliding his hands down the inside of Ethan’s thighs and his body caught fire, flames licking at his balls from the gentle caress of Beau’s callused fingers against his skin. “Anything?”
“Yes, fuck, anything.” Ethan’s back tightened as Beau pushed his legs open slightly.
“Turn over.”
Ethan stared back at Beau for a moment but then rolled over onto his stomach, his head buried in the pillow.
Beau’s mouth clasped onto the sensitive skin at the back of his neck, and he moaned. Reaching down, he gripped Beau’s thigh with one hand, needing to hold on to him, to feel his bare skin in his palm as he grounded himself in the moment. It was too good.
As Beau’s tongue trailed over his back, Ethan realized he was outlining the tattoo he’d gotten several years ago - This above all: to thine ownself be true. He’d gotten the words etched in his skin as a reminder to himself, but it hadn’t helped. As much as he wanted to embrace who he was, to be content with himself and his life, Ethan had never accomplished his goal. He’d lived his life in denial, and up until now, he thought he was ok with it.
That was until Beau had walked into his life and turned it upside down and inside out. Now, no matter what he did, he couldn’t stop thinking about the what ifs. And every last one of them included Beau.
“Fuck!” Ethan groaned when Beau’s mouth trailed down the center of his back, his firm grip on his hips easing lower, lower still.
Awww, hell.
Ethan’s entire body tightened when Beau slid his tongue down the crack of his ass, using his hands to separate his ass cheeks. It was… the most remarkable feeling and even though Beau had just done that in the shower, Ethan was eager for more. The way he aroused the oversensitive skin made Ethan shudder.
Gripping the pillow beneath his head, Ethan buried his face deeper as his body soared to new heights. He began rocking his hips backward, forcing Beau’s wicked tongue inside of him.
“Beau,” Ethan moaned, turning his head so he could breathe. “Beau, fuck. I need to feel you.”
“I’m right here, baby,” Beau growled before teasing him with his tongue, then his finger. Deeper.
Oh… fucking shit, son of a bitch!
Beau’s finger eased inside of him, twisted and then…
“Oh, hell. Oh, fuck.” Ethan’s body tensed painfully, the exquisite torture consuming him from the inside out, forcing him closer and closer to the edge although he was fighting back with all of his might.
Where did Beau learn to do that? He was pressing inside, hitting the exact spot that had him seeing stars, his body shaking from the potency of it. It wasn’t very often that he’d had his prostate massaged with a finger, but obviously Beau was trying to make him delirious. He told his hips to pull away, but they had a mind of their own as he thrust back against Beau’s hand, forcing that exhilarating sensation to engulf him altogether.
“Beau, I need you inside me. Don’t…” Taking a deep breath, Ethan willed his body under control, but he was losing his grip faster than he thought possible. “Don’t make me come. Fuck!”
Ethan wanted Beau inside of him. Fucking him until he didn’t even know his own name.
Pulling away was the hardest thing he’d ever done, but he wasn’t willing to come. Not yet. This was Beau’s first time, and it meant something to Ethan for them to be right there together.
Beau crawled up over him, and Ethan sucked in air, trying to calm his rioting hormones.
“Condom,” Beau whispered, and Ethan pointed toward the nightstand beside the bed.
“Lube’s in there too. Oh, and Beau…”
“Yeah?”
“Hurry.”
♂♂
Making Ethan lose control was now at the top of Beau’s list of things to do. Every single day.
Having the freedom to explore his body was the most erotic thing he’d ever experienced. Being able to bring him pleasure was like a salve to his soul. Never had he known anything like it before.
Having only been involved in threesomes where the woman was usually with Zane, Beau had gotten used to being there for pleasure only, but never had he received that sort of satisfaction from the act. There was certainly something to be said about giving, rather than receiving, but Beau had never realized the monumental meaning behind those words until today.
Grabbing a condom and the bottle of lubrication sitting by the already opened box, Beau knelt on the bed behind Ethan. With hurried hands, he slid the latex over his iron hard erection, careful so that he didn’t go off like a rocket from his own hand. Using the pump-action bottle, Beau coated his cock, his hand and then applied more lube directly to Ethan’s asshole. He proceeded to massage the lube into Ethan’s tight hole, before sliding his body over Ethan’s once more.
If it hadn’t been for his cock begging for release, Beau would’ve been satisfied to drive Ethan to orgasm with his fingers thrusting in and out of his ass. He picked up the pace briefly, loving Ethan’s groans and grunts as he tried to force Beau deeper, despite his request not to send him over. Withdrawing his fingers, Beau gripped his own shaft at the base, stemming the overwhelming urge to come just from watching Ethan’s reactions.
“Turn over,” Beau urged, holding himself up so that Ethan had room to move.
Once Ethan was on his back, Beau settled between his legs again, staring down at his lover. The man was breathtaking. Every move, every sound, every look.
“Inside me. Now.” Ethan’s demand left no room for argument.
Beau shifted, leaning forward and propping himself up with one arm while he positioned his cock at Ethan’s entrance. His muscles tensed in an effort to take things slow.
“Slow, baby,” Ethan crooned and Beau met his gaze, his heart swelling from the term of endearment. Why he had the feeling that Ethan didn’t use that word often, he had no idea. And why it made him feel like he was ten feet tall and bullet proof was beyond him as well.
Pressing the head of his cock against Ethan’s well-lubed asshole, Beau sucked in a sharp breath. “Fuck,” he breathed out heavily. “You’re so tight.”
Ethan’s hands came down to rest on Beau’s thighs, and the contact was so gentle, so caring, he was hard pressed to continue. It took several long seconds before Beau managed to breach the tight ring of muscles, and when he did, he was barely breathing, the tight sheath of Ethan’s body swathing him with molten heat.
“Come here,” Ethan whispered, lifting his arms up and welcoming Beau closer. “I want to feel every part of you against me.”
Beau wanted that too.
When he was hovering above Ethan, their eyes locked together while he began to slowly rock inside of his body, he wasn’t sure he was going to last for more than a few seconds.
“You feel so good,” Ethan groaned, his head tilting back.
Beau pressed his lips to Ethan’s throat and closed his eyes, letting the warmth of his body consume him. Easing his hips forward, Beau slid in as deep as he could before retreating gradually. Repeating the motion over and over until his body was covered in a fine sheen of sweat, his bottom lip probably punctured because he’d been biting it in an attempt to hold off his release.
“Tell me that you’ve never done this before,” Ethan said, his hands moving up to cup Beau’s face.
His eyes opened and he met the passionate blue gaze of the most striking man he’d ever known. “I’ve never…”
“Tell me,” Ethan demanded, his voice more urgent. “I need to hear you say it.”
“I’ve never done this before.” And Beau wasn’t just talking about the fact that he’d never slid into the warm depths of a man before. He was speaking on a much deeper level, but he wasn’t going to let Ethan know that. As it w
as, Beau wasn’t sure how the words came out because he felt like he was floating, hovering in the clouds, watching what was happening from a distant perch but basking in every single glorious sensation. It was the most electrifying feeling in the world to be with this man.
“It’s incredible,” Beau whispered. “So fucking good.”
Ethan gripped his chin, and Beau realized he’d closed his eyes again.
“Look at me.”
Beau fought the urge to let the friction consume him, to take him away. He burrowed deeper, thrusting his hips forward, sliding into Ethan’s white-hot heat until he couldn’t go farther.
“I’ve never known anything like this.”
Beau’s eyes widened. He wouldn’t have been more surprised if Ethan had whispered that he loved him. And he didn’t need to hear the words because the emotion that caused Ethan’s voice to tremble told him everything that words couldn’t.
He swallowed hard, unable to speak because he knew if he opened his mouth, he would say those words. He would scare Ethan to the point of retreat and right then and there, Beau wanted this moment to last for eternity.
“Harder, baby,” Ethan groaned, his hands sliding down his back to grip his ass.
Beau’s hips bucked, driving him in hard. Ethan maintained eye contact as Beau let himself go, trying to go slow at first. He was buried in Ethan’s ass, and he was so overwhelmed that he wasn’t sure how he managed to hang on to that last remnant of his control because the urge to pound into him began to intensify.
As though Ethan knew exactly what he wanted, he lifted his knees, raising them closer to his chest, which sent Beau in deeper.
“Oh, fuck. You feel too damn good. Fuck me, Beau. Fuck me hard.”
Beau hesitated only briefly before he pushed up, gripping Ethan’s knees as he began to grind his dick into the scalding hot recesses of Ethan’s body. Faster. Harder. Deeper. Before he knew it, he was pounding into Ethan, reveling in his sensual moans and the way his hands were once again gripping his thighs.
When Ethan released Beau’s leg with one hand and began stroking his own cock furiously, Beau knew he wasn’t going to last.
“Come for me, E,” Beau whispered. “I want to come in your ass. Ahhh, fuck, E.”
Beau slammed into him over and over, watching as Ethan squeezed his cock in a tight fist, stroking faster and faster.
“Fuck, E! I’m coming!” Beau yelled, a tortured growl escaping his chest as his body hummed to a new level, higher and higher until… his release detonated, exploding out of him as his hips locked, his dick buried deep inside of Ethan.
“God, yes!” Ethan bellowed as he came on his chest.
Before Beau could think or do anything else, he leaned forward, licking the cum from Ethan’s chest while he tried to catch his breath. He didn’t want to move away, didn’t want to pull out of Ethan’s body because he feared he would never feel anything quite so perfect again in his entire life.
And unlike before, Beau knew without a doubt that he’d fallen head over heels in love with this man.
Now he just had to figure out what he was supposed to do with that knowledge.
Chapter Twenty Five
♂♂
Ethan knew he was dreaming. Knew that what was happening couldn’t be real because there was no way he could possibly survive the horror of that day all over again, yet he couldn’t force himself to wake up.
“I’m not scared. I don’t want this. I don’t want you. I’m not…”
Ethan watched Gavin’s throat work as he swallowed hard, his eyes darting around their surroundings. Ethan knew he was looking for someone or something, or maybe just an escape route. Whatever it was, Ethan could only focus on the words coming out of Gavin’s mouth.
“I didn’t want that to happen between us. You shouldn’t have made me.”
Ethan’s boot got caught on a log as he stumbled, the force of Gavin’s words nearly landing him on his ass. He couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. Was the man he loved really saying he’d forced him to…?
“What? How can you say that?” Ethan asked defensively, trying to swallow past the suffocating ball of emotions that had lodged in his throat. “I didn’t make you do anything. We made love, Gavin.”
Ethan watched as Gavin shook his head and then his eyes landed on something behind Ethan. Without thinking, he turned to see what it was.
Oh, shit.
“You little fucking faggot!” Gavin’s older brother Jimmy suddenly appeared behind Ethan. He was yelling, his voice so angry, so deadly, a shiver raced down Ethan’s spine as he tried to back up only to come up against the downed tree that Gavin had been sitting on minutes earlier.
Ethan had only met Jimmy once, and even then he got a bad vibe from him. But this man, this man was pure evil staring back at him like he was ready to murder Ethan.
“You sorry fucking cocksucker! I’ll teach you to prey on men, you fucking faggot!”
Before Jimmy’s rambling words could register, the pain did. Ethan watched as though in slow motion as the baseball bat swinging from Jimmy’s arms came around and made a direct hit with his… ribs.
Fuck. Can’t breathe!
Ethan curled over, the pain excruciating, and all but crippling him as he gasped for air, trying to scream through the torment shooting fire through his ribcage. There were no sounds escaping, but Ethan was getting lightheaded. His body crumpled to the ground as though his bones had all been shattered with that one well aimed hit.
Ethan would soon learn that was just the beginning.
“You son of a bitch. Faggots aren’t welcome in this town.” Jimmy’s rage projected through his words, echoing off of the water not far away as he brought the bat down on Ethan again, this time hitting his upper arm.
Ethan didn’t know what Jimmy was aiming for, but he couldn’t even move, couldn’t protect himself. Glancing around hysterically, he tried to find something to defend himself with, but the bat made contact with his left thigh and the fire that shot through him made him scream.
Out of his periphery, he saw Gavin standing several feet away, his eyes wide with terror, but he wasn’t moving. Wasn’t trying to help.
“That’s right, you little fucking girl. Cry for me. That’ll teach you to fuck anyone in the ass. Especially my brother!”
Ethan forced his eyes open as he curled into a tighter ball, trying to protect himself the best he could. It wasn’t helping. Jimmy found every vulnerable spot with either the bat or his boot, sometimes both. And with every savage blow to his ribs, and the brutal punches to his face, Ethan feared he wouldn’t survive the next one.
Where the hell was Gavin? Why was he letting this happen? Had he told Jimmy that he had forced him?
Oh, God!
Pain. Every merciless hit had fire licking through Ethan’s body, his brain function dimming as he fought unconsciousness, obviously his body’s way of trying to save itself from the agony.
“Gavin!” Ethan yelled. Or at least he thought he was yelling. The sound came out more as a gasp. He needed help, unable to save himself from the brutality.
“Don’t say his name,” Jimmy roared. “Never say his fucking name again. He’s not a queer like you!”
Ethan couldn’t hang on. He tried to make his brain function enough to breathe through the pain, but it was too much for him to handle. There was nothing he could do as the blackness wrapped around him, sucking him under. He was hovering on the edge of consciousness, wanting desperately to escape, but knowing if he let go, he might never wake up.
He wanted to wake up. This couldn’t be the end. Couldn’t be the –
“Ethan! Wake up, baby.”
Ethan searched for the voice from inside the cruel dream, tried to pull himself out of the nightmare. The sweetest voice was calling him and he knew he needed to get to him, needed to find Beau. Needed someone to save him.
Hard arms wrapped around him, gripping him tight and holding him close. Familiar arms. Not trying to hurt him.
> There was no pain.
“E, baby, wake up,” Beau whispered against his ear, his lips warm where they touched him.
Ethan managed to force his eyes open. The room was dark and it took a moment to orient himself, but he recognized his bedroom, his pillow, the spicy rich scent of Beau.
He was grateful when Beau didn’t say a word, didn’t ask any questions, just kept him securely wrapped in the safe circle of his arms. He had no idea how much time passed as he lay there, soaking up Beau’s warmth, listening to his heartbeat, feeling the flex of his muscles around him.
“I’m sorry,” Ethan said some time later when he managed to get his breathing regulated, his heartbeat back to a normal rhythm.
“Don’t apologize,” Beau said roughly, but softly, his arms tightening ever so slightly.
Ethan nodded his head in agreement and burrowed closer to Beau. He was facing away from him, and he was thankful Beau couldn’t see his face. Had he been crying? He knew in the past he’d awoken from the nightmare drenched in sweat, tears streaming down his face. He didn’t want Beau to see him like that.
He hadn’t had a nightmare about Gavin or Jimmy in a long time. Several months at least. And he knew what brought it on, but the memories were now forefront in his mind and he knew it was going to take some time to push them back into that little box that he tried to keep them contained in, no matter how desperate they were to get out.
“E?” Beau’s voice was steady and strong, a lifeline that Ethan found himself clinging to.
“Yeah?”
“If you ever want to talk, just know I’m here.”
Ethan swallowed past the lump in his throat. He wanted to take Beau up on the offer, to share his deepest, darkest secrets with this man, but he knew it wouldn’t help. If anything, Beau would probably look at him differently. If he knew that Ethan was responsible…
Ethan (Alluring Indulgence) Page 22
