Sons of Justice 11: If Love Was Real (Siren Publishing LoveXtreme Forever)

by Dixie Lynn Dwyer

  “Lots of things are going through my head.”

  “Like what?” Yani asked, easing his hand to her chin and brushing her lower lip with his thumb. He stared at her and she looked at him, mesmerized by his dark blue eyes. “I love your eyes. They’re so gorgeous, and your skin, perfect, soft, youthful,” Yani whispered, and then leaned closer and pressed his lips to hers.

  She felt his hand smooth along to her neck, and tilted her mouth up toward his so he could deepen the kiss. Flame lifted her arm above her head and leaned lower to suckle her breast. She couldn’t believe she felt so much so soon. That they seemed to want her constantly. She moaned into Yani’s mouth. This is how the day was going. Resting in between, then making love again and again. She was exhausted, yet aroused, wanting them inside of her, yet feeling after every time they made love that she was more connected, more desperate to possess them. Seeing the dog tags, holding them in her hands, made her think of how it would be when they left for a mission. What would happen after today? What did they expect from her, and better yet, what did she expect from them?

  Yani softly released her lips and Flame released her breast and nipple to ease down her body with his mouth. He lifted her one thigh over his head and onto his shoulder, widening her to his fingers. He stared at her pussy. She gulped, kept her one arm above her head where he left it, learning that they expected submission, and she pretty much loved being submissive. It made her orgasm. Got her ready for their cocks.

  He slid fingers into her sensitive pussy and she felt the ache.

  “Ouch.” She gasped. He froze, scowl on his face and Yani did the same. Slova and Cast sat up. Flame pulled his fingers softly, slowly from her body.

  “Pain?” he asked her. Tears filled her eyes. She didn’t want to be fragile or weak, she wanted to be strong, and capable of handling them. What if she couldn’t? What if they were too big and she was just too petite in comparison? She covered her mouth with her hand and went to move. “No.” Yani and Flame grabbed her at the same time. Flame slid out from between her legs and started barking, “Slova get a hot bath started.”

  “Cast, look for something in her bathroom to ease the ache. Epson salt or something,” he ordered, and the two men, still with scowls on their faces, headed into the bathroom.

  Yani slid from the bed and stepped into his jeans.

  “What else, Flame?”

  Flame appeared like he was trying to breathe through his nostrils he was so upset.

  “Flame, it’s okay.” She reached for his forearm.

  “No. It isn’t. We took you too many times. We’re big men, and have big cocks, and should have controlled our need and took our time with you. You never had sex before, and you’re feminine and small, and so fucking tight. Jesus, we should have realized.” He ran his fingers through his hair.

  She gripped onto his shoulder and his hair and pulled him lower.

  “No, no it was perfect and beautiful, and I wanted to do it again. I still do.”

  “No,” he and Yani said at the same time.

  She didn’t know how to feel about this or how to process it. “Wait, don’t be angry and disappointed at me. I’ll get better at it. I will.”

  “What?” Cast asked, walking back into the bedroom.

  “I can handle it,” she said.

  Flame cupped her cheeks and stared into her eyes. “No, baby, we’re not saying you can’t handle us. This is normal for it to hurt, to ache afterward. We should have gone slower because there are four of us. We’ll rest, and get something to eat after you take a bath.”

  She stared at him, but saw the change in his eyes, in his facial expression. Her heart ached, too. She screwed up by admitting she was achy. Now he would think she was immature and unable to handle a ménage. They’re so strong and capable and she’s weak, or at least they see her as weak.

  “Bring her in. She had bath salts in the closet, I put those in there,” Slova said, and then Flame got up, reached for her and then lifted her up into his arms.

  “I can walk.”

  “No. You’re our responsibility. We should have known better. Done things differently. This was a concern even before learning of your inexperience,” he snapped, and then carried her into the bathroom. His words, the way he referred to her inexperience was almost as if it were a negative and a curse. Had they wanted a woman who had more experience with sex? He slowly set her into the water. She felt how hot it was, but didn’t complain. She wouldn’t say a word. She didn’t understand any of this. Not their intense reaction and what was to come of this. She sealed her lips and leaned back in the tub, exhaled as the heat of the water was felt instantly. She leaned back.

  The bathroom was so small as was the entire apartment. She was sort of embarrassed by it, and with four extra-large men squeezing in here and staring at her, she wanted to cry.

  “I’ll be fine. I’ll soak a little bit and be okay. Why don’t you guys get something to drink, and when I’m done I’ll make us something to eat?” she said to them. That was her. Always wanting to appease everyone. Take care of them, solve things and not just sit back and do nothing.

  “You’ll do no such thing. We’ll handle dinner, you soak at least twenty minutes,” Flame said, and looked at his watch then set a time.

  “Seriously, did you set a timer?” she asked him, and maybe with a bit of attitude. She didn’t know where that came from. Well, maybe she did. From being embarrassed on multiple levels. He raised one of his eyebrows up at her and she swallowed hard then sat straight, leaned her head back, and closed her eyes. She just got a direct order. She thought about her reaction, and about this situation. She was embarrassed by her apartment, by her inability to handle four lovers her first time having sex, oh but it was so good the first few times. She didn’t think she was achy at all as her pussy reacted to their lips and tongues, but when he slid his fingers into her cunt, it ached and burned a little. She eased her fingers over her belly and down to her pussy lips. They were swollen. That was different, and as she eased a finger deeper, she only felt a slight ache. Maybe Flame had a point and knew a bath would help.

  That thought made her think of their experiences with other women. How many other women have those men screwed?

  Tears filled her eyes. They were all close to forty. She was twenty-five and had no lovers. Some of her friends had one or two at twenty-five. Maybe the norm by forty might be…oh God. A tear fell. They could have way more than twenty lovers a piece, that would be over a hundred women between the four of them. She covered her face with her hands.

  I had none until them. They were my first, would they be my only ever? Am I too young to commit to them? What if this is a mistake? What if they didn’t take me giving them my virginity seriously? Oh God, how many virgins have they de-virginized? She was in a complete panic. Then she thought she heard the front door close.

  “Oh God, they left me.” Tears rolled down her cheeks and her heart ached something terrible. Then she heard Flame’s voice and Yani’s. So they were still there, but someone left. Maybe Slova or Cast. Maybe to get food. She tried to settle her nerves, and all the fears down. They were good men. They were soldiers, they were respectful. If nothing came of this, then they would still be respectful. But I really, really like them. Oh Lord, maybe they had so many lovers because they’re so good looking, experienced, and capable. Maybe the women they met weren’t strong enough, or they were too clingy and needy. She couldn’t be needy. Oh shit, she told them about her family and about her father, about the struggles she had. Shit, shit, shit, I screwed up. I need to fix this. I need to be stronger. I have to figure out a way to handle this. How can I make them see how strong I am? That I don’t need pampering?

  She swallowed hard and felt her heart racing. The water was cooling. His alarm didn’t go off yet. Could she get out now or wait? Would it anger him, make him pull back if she got out before Flame came in to get her, or would that make him impressed by her strength and her fast recuperation time? Her gut clenche
d. He was a commanding, forceful man. He would want her to wait for his order.

  She eased back and slid her hand down her belly. “Don’t be sore, don’t be sore, don’t be sore. I like them so much. I want this to work. They make me feel special, safe, well loved. Please,” she whispered to herself, and then eased her fingers into her pussy. No pain. She exhaled, but she was still nervous. What the hell am I thinking? I am strong. Look at all the shit I’ve gone through. Look what I have had to give up in order to take care of my family. I’m a good person. I deserve respect, I deserve to be loved, damn it. This is my time, my pleasure, my feeling of completion, or happiness. Her mom popped into her head, then her brother, and aunt. She had burdens, responsibilities, stresses in her life. She could handle it all, and a ménage relationship with four extra-large, demanding, older, sexy men. She could do it. She would do it.

  “How are you doing?” Yani asked, walking in fully dressed. Maybe they wouldn’t stay after dinner. Maybe they wouldn’t want to make love to her again because of the weakness she showed.

  “I’m good. I’m getting out now. I need a towel though.” He stared at her, squinted, like he was thinking something but didn’t say it. She stared at him and then he reached for the towel. As she slowly stood up, Flame came to the door, looking at his watch.

  “You have a few minutes left.”

  “I’m done,” she said, and reached for the towel. They looked at her body. It reacted immediately. Her nipples hardened, her pussy clenched. They had to see her nipples harden, yet they didn’t move into action to touch her, suck on them, or carry her back to bed.

  “Soaking helps, and is necessary,” he snapped at her as she snagged the towel from Yani and wrapped it around herself. She stepped out of the tub onto the mat.

  “I guess you would know from how many lovers you’ve had, but that was enough for me. The water is getting cold. I want to get dressed. It’s getting late,” she added unintentionally. So who was pushing who away now?

  He didn’t say a word, he walked out of the room.

  Yani rubbed her arms. “It’s natural to be sore after the first time having sex, times that by four men, add in our sizes and how many times we made love this afternoon, and well, it would make sense that you’re sore. We should have taken our time, but we didn’t. We’ll make that up to you,” he said, and stroked her cheek and lowered down and pressed his lips to hers.

  She closed her eyes, in that instant she felt perfect, like everything was fine, but before then, and now as he pulled away, she felt unsure, confused, concerned, and vulnerable. Maybe she wasn’t ready to give her full trust. What if her mom was right? What if these men just wanted sex? What did she have to offer them besides her virginity, her body? Now what? It wasn’t like she had a steady professional job, or was making ends meet on her own. She didn’t want them to see her as a burden, or in need. She had to get her shit together.

  “I’m so hungry.”

  “Well, the guys went to pick up food.”

  “Great. I’ll get dressed, then get some plates and things.”

  “We did already.”

  “You found where I keep my paper plates and things?” she asked as they walked into the bedroom and she reached for her bra.

  “It wasn’t hard,” he said, and took a seat on the edge of the bed, watching her dress.

  Was that a shot at her having a tiny apartment above a store? An indication that she had little, owned little, was maybe low class or something? Tears filled her eyes but she pushed them away. She needed to be strong, so she got dressed in front of him, being sure to act sexy. She slipped into lounge pants and a bra, then put on an off the shoulder long sleeve top. She went to walk by and he grabbed her, pulled her between his legs and squeezed her tight.

  “Today was incredible,” he said to her, and nipped her breast through the shirt as he held her hands behind her back. She gasped, shocked at his move and also his words. Was that his way of looking at it as pretty good sex, but putting a little wall up to not take it so seriously? Crap, she didn’t know or understand men, relationships, or post sex protocol. She calmed her breathing, followed her gut and focused on being strong.

  “It was incredible. We should do it again sometime,” she added nonchalantly.

  He pulled back, squinted at her and then chuckled.

  “Yeah, definitely,” he said, and she didn’t understand why he sounded sarcastic, or like he didn’t take her seriously.

  She was done analyzing everything. She needed a drink. A strong one. She pulled back and he stood up. Flame stood there watching them. He eyed her over.

  “Want a drink? You have some beers and wine in the refrigerator besides water,” he said to her.

  “It’s like a bachelorette pad,” Yani said and chuckled.

  “Well, I do live alone,” she said to them, and walked toward the kitchen. She never realized the whole open floor plan of this apartment would make her feel so exposed, but it did. She was under a microscope, and there was no turning back. They wanted a more experienced, more independent, confident woman who can handle things, keep pain, problems, uncertainty to herself and deal with it. She could do this. They were older, and maybe they were suddenly thinking she was too young, a burden, someone they needed to watch over and protect or something. It made her feel immature and not good enough for such older capable men. She straightened out her shoulders and pulled that inner strength she always seemed to find when the sky was falling, and she smiled softly and handed out beers. She learned a long time ago that the only person to count on was herself. Apparently, that was the case in love affairs, as well.

  * * * *

  “That didn’t go too well. I think she’s still upset,” Cast said to the team.

  “Of course she’s still upset. We hurt her. She can deny it all she wants, but we are too experienced for her. She deserved better treatment her first time around,” Flame stated, and slammed the truck door closed.

  “We were patient and her first time, the first time making love to her was amazing, and we all felt the connection. Taking her several times after and giving into the intense sensations, the need to mark her, possess her, hell claim her like fucking cavemen, never happened to any of us before,” Yani said to him.

  “That’s for shit sure. I didn’t want to leave her,” Slova said.

  “She has work in the morning and the evening. We won’t see her for a couple of days, maybe that’s a good thing,” Flame said.

  “How the fuck is that a good thing? I already feel the loss not having her close where I can reach out and touch her, hell, kiss her,” Cast stated.

  “The best thing to do is ease into this slowly. She is young,” Flame stated as he drove the truck down the street.

  “You keep bringing up her youth and her inexperience, why? We went over this before we made a move. We knew it didn’t matter because of the attraction.” Yani said to him.

  “We hurt her,” Flame stated.

  “Not intentionally, but pushing her away now, acting like her age and inexperience ruined things is wrong,” Yani said to him.

  “That’s not what I’m doing,” Flame stated.

  “Really, because your words to her about her inexperience sounded like you were disappointed.”

  “Disappointed. Are you fucking crazy? I felt overwhelmed learning about her virginity, and that she wanted to share it with us. That we were her firsts. The desire, the possessiveness I’m feeling is insane, it’s borderline psycho. I want her in every way. I want to protect her, take her pain away, her sacrifices for her family, the burdens she had to face alone. I want to resolve everything for her, wrap her up in my arms and protect her,” Flame admitted.

  “Then maybe we should have told her that. Maybe we’re all feeling a bit insecure and shocked at how instantly we fell in love with a woman. A young, sexy, charismatic woman that needs protection and care. God damn, just look into her fucking eyes. Jesus,” Slova said, and shook his head side to side.

  “A
n angel. She’s like a gorgeous angel,” Cast said.

  “Are we going to explain things to her? Tell her we want guardianship of her or what? Because right now the idea that another man could come sniffing around is pissing me off,” Slova said to them.

  “I think we need to stick to the plan of taking our time, giving her time to adjust, to us,” Flame said.

  “As much as I love making love to her, seeing her naked, tasting every inch of her, there’s more to this than that. I loved sleeping in bed with her, just holding Marianna while we slept. It’s fucking crazy,” Cast stated.

  “Crazy indeed,” Slova said.

  “We’re so screwed, why fight it, Flame? We want her as our woman, hell, our wife. We aren’t getting any younger,” Yani said.

  “Don’t remind me. It’s going to take a lot to get over this age difference thing. With a woman as beautiful as Marianna, we’re going to be tossing guys left and right, and ones younger,” Flame said.

  “We love her together, protect her together, we can warn off men from her together, even with a fucking cane or walker,” Cast stated.

  They chuckled.

  “Agree,” Flame said.

  “Agree,” Slova, Cast, and Yani replied and they chuckled as Flame pulled into the driveway and it hit him, he missed her already and wished he had asked her to come home with them.

  “One thing’s for sure, she isn’t staying in that apartment much longer. I want her here with us. I want her to have things she never had before, that she couldn’t afford, couldn’t splurge on,” Flame stated.

  “I couldn’t agree more. One week, then she’s moving in here with us,” Cast said, and they headed inside.

  Flame had a feeling it wasn’t going to go so easy, and that Marianna was humbler, and too gracious to accept anything from anyone, especially with having her mother’s experience with Marianna’s father as the only example of how men treated their women. Their job would be to show her how real men act and love their woman. Starting in a few days when they would make plans to meet again.