A Soldier's Christmas: I'll Be Home for ChristmasPresents Under the TreeIf Only in My Dreams

by Leslie Kelly

  For a brief instant, Aiden privately disagreed with him. “Yeah, I would.”

  The second man came to stand beside Lily, wearing the same jungle camouflage that she did, and Aiden saw a stethoscope dangling out of the side pocket of his fatigues.

  “How’s our patient this morning?” he asked, crossing his arms and staring at Aiden as if he were some interesting specimen that he’d found under a rock.

  Lily reached for a folder on a side table, opening it to show the doctor the contents. “He’s much better. Still running a fever, but at least the convulsions have stopped, and he’s lucid. He’s no longer dehydrated, and I just gave him something for the pain.”

  The other man scanned the folder and then closed it and handed it back to Lily. “Excellent.” Bending over Aiden, he withdrew a pen light and flashed it into his eyes. “I’m Captain Morse, the new field surgeon. How are you feeling? Are you nauseous?”

  Aiden pushed the light away. “I’m fine,” he said through gritted teeth. “Never better.”

  Brad snorted.

  Lily touched Brad’s sleeve. “Why don’t you wait outside until after the doctor examines him? I’ll let you know when you can visit.”

  “Sure.” He fist-bumped Aiden. “Glad you’re feeling better, bro.”

  “Yeah.” He watched as Lily walked with Brad to the entrance, and they exchanged words that were too low for him to hear. But when Lily came back, her mouth was a thin line, and her expression was shuttered.

  After checking his vitals, Captain Morse straightened and scratched some notes on Aiden’s medical record.

  “You’re making good progress.” He turned to Lily. “Let’s give him a few more days to get some strength back. Meanwhile, I’ll contact joint ops and arrange for you both to leave on Friday.”

  Aiden pushed himself up onto one elbow. “Wait. What do you mean, both?”

  The field surgeon gave him a surprised look. “You’re in no condition to travel alone. Sergeant Munroe’s tour is ending, and now that I’m here, we can afford to release her. So we’re sending her home with you.”

  “Well, not to your actual home,” Lily said in a rush. “But I’ll travel with you as far as Atlanta and make sure you’re all set to go home.”

  Aiden barely suppressed a groan. He was returning to the United States with the one woman he shouldn’t be trusted to be alone with, even in his present condition. She was too tempting.

  Though the one thing guaranteed to make him keep his distance was the knowledge that she was in a relationship with Brad Dixon. His team member. His SEAL brother. The man who had saved his life.

  2

  LILY QUIETLY CLOSED her book and glanced over at Aiden. He was asleep beside her, his head against the headrest and his M16 rifle cradled loosely in the crook of his arm. How he could sleep was beyond her, given that they were packed into the military cargo jet like sardines in a tin can. Like all of the hundred or so soldiers on the aircraft, they both wore their combat uniforms. Their helmets and rucksacks were tucked on the floor by their feet, cramping the tight space even more.

  They’d been traveling for nearly forty-eight hours, first from the Sudan to an air base in Germany, and now to Fort Benning in Georgia. Once on the ground, they would turn in their weapons and equipment, endure a cursory medical exam and out-briefing and then head to the airport in Atlanta to catch a commercial flight to their final destination.

  By the time they’d boarded the enormous aircraft in Germany, Aiden had almost literally been on his last legs. Although he never complained, Lily knew his joints still ached, and she’d forced several pain killers on him. The result was that he’d fallen into a restless sleep. But as uncomfortable as the aircraft was, Lily almost didn’t want the flight to end. Once they completed their out-processing at Fort Benning, Aiden would catch a flight to Monterey, and Lily would travel on to Crescent City, California. She doubted their paths would cross again. But for the next few hours, at least, he was hers.

  She took the opportunity to study him. Shadows still lingered beneath his eyes, and lines of strain were etched beside his mouth. Despite this, he was hands down the most gorgeous guy she’d ever met. A twinge of guilt pricked her conscience. He wasn’t completely well, and yet she couldn’t stop thinking about him. Of what it would be like to explore his magnificent body. Of stroking his skin, and feeling him respond to her touch.

  No doubt about it—she was a horrible person.

  When she’d first seen him at the joint operations command in Entebbe, she’d been unable to stop staring at him. She knew he was a navy SEAL, but he looked more like a surfer—or a movie star—with his tanned skin, sun-streaked hair and startling blue eyes. And when he smiled, her insides turned to liquid. But despite his golden good looks, there was something dangerous about him, and thoroughly masculine. Nobody would ever make the mistake of calling Aiden Cross a pretty boy.

  And whenever his eyes were on her, she became uncomfortably aware of herself inside her own skin. If he was near, it took all her effort to focus on her job, and not him.

  As the only female on this last mission, she’d become accustomed to a certain amount of masculine attention. But as far as she could tell, Aiden Cross had absolutely no interest in her. She might have been one of the guys for all the notice he took of her as a woman. Several times, when their gazes had met, she’d stared openly at him, letting him see her undisguised interest. But he’d turned away.

  So when his friend and fellow SEAL Brad Dixon had come on to her, she hadn’t objected, hoping it might rouse some kind of response from Aiden. But again, he’d been coolly disinterested, and Lily had found herself in the awkward position of trying to avoid Brad’s advances afterward. She’d been such an idiot, playing adolescent games when she should have been focusing on her job.

  That had been easier to do once the SEAL team had left Entebbe, and Aiden Cross was no longer a distraction. But his absence hadn’t stopped her from thinking about him, hoping he would return safely. Then on the day his team had arrived at the outpost, pulling his limp body on a makeshift stretcher, she’d thought her worst fears had been realized. She’d actually been relieved to discover he had dengue fever. He would survive.

  Aiden stirred restlessly beside her, and she watched his face twitch in sleep. His brow furrowed, and she wanted to lean over and smooth the frown away, as she had done so many times during his illness. In sleep, he was still good-looking, but the full force of his appeal wasn’t evident until he opened his eyes. He did so then, groaning a little as he straightened in his seat. Then he turned his gaze to her, and Lily watched, fascinated, as grogginess slowly gave way to awareness.

  He pushed himself higher and glanced around at his surroundings. “How long did I sleep?”

  “Not long. We’ll be landing at Fort Benning soon.”

  No sooner were the words out of her mouth, than the aircraft gave a violent lurch, and then shuddered through a series of terrifying bumps. A collective mutter of surprise went up from the other soldiers, and without realizing she’d even moved, Lily found herself clutching Aiden’s forearm, her fingers digging into the strong muscles.

  “Just a little turbulence,” Aiden said, surprising her by covering her hand with his.

  Lily pulled her hand back. “Sorry. I just wasn’t expecting that.”

  Within seconds, the pilot’s voice could be heard over the aircraft’s intercom.

  “Folks, we’re encountering some turbulence as a result of a severe storm moving through the southeastern region. Our controllers on the ground are telling us that conditions at Fort Benning have deteriorated, with a risk of tornadoes in the area. We’re diverting to Fort Atterbury in Indiana, instead. We should have you on the ground in ninety minutes.”

  Lily frowned. “Why Indiana?”

  “There are only two military bases set up for
out-processing this many returning troops—Fort Benning and Fort Atterbury,” Aiden replied.

  “But how will this impact our flights to California? Our paperwork says we’re leaving from Atlanta,” Lily said, beginning to feel the first frissons of alarm finger their way along her spine.

  “We’ll likely be delayed while they redo our orders.”

  “You’ve done this before,” Lily guessed.

  “A couple of times,” he confirmed with a wry smile.

  “So how long will it take them to redo our orders and get us out-processed?”

  Aiden gave her a sympathetic look. “Let’s just say that I wouldn’t plan on getting home tonight.”

  Christmas was just two days away. For herself, she didn’t really care where she spent the holiday, even if it was at a military base in the middle of Indiana, but she sensed how much Aiden was anticipating being with his family.

  “Maybe they’ll get us processed quickly, and we can catch a flight out of Indianapolis in the morning,” he said, misinterpreting her expression. “Let me see what I can find out.” Reaching into one of his pockets, he withdrew a smartphone and began scrolling through the applications. “There are a couple of flights tomorrow, and the weather looks okay, so as long as we can get through the out-processing reasonably quickly we should be able to get home for Christmas.”

  Leaning close, he angled the phone so that Lily could see the small screen. She was acutely aware of his nearness and of the way he smelled—like delicious, unadulterated male. Forcing herself to focus on the phone, she read there were indeed several flights leaving Indianapolis the following day.

  “Let’s just hope they have some seats available,” she commented, “or you might end up spending your holiday at Fort Atterbury with me.”

  She raised her gaze and found herself ensnared in the blueness of Aiden’s eyes. Her breath caught at the expression of raw, masculine heat she saw there. He glanced away in the next instant, and Lily wondered if she had only imagined the heat. Then he shoved the phone back in his pocket and crossed his arms, tension radiating from him.

  She let out a shaky breath, her heart thudding hard. She hadn’t been mistaken. That look had been the one she’d dreamed of seeing on his face, but until this moment, she’d been certain he had no personal interest in her. So what did that look mean? And did she have the courage to do anything about it?

  He shifted his gaze back to her and loosened his arms. “Assuming that we are able to get a flight out in the morning, are you excited about the holidays?”

  Lily thought about going home for the holiday and shrugged. “Christmas has never been a big deal in my family.”

  She felt Aiden’s interest sharpen. “Why not? Is it a religious thing?”

  “No.” Lily paused and drew in a deep breath. Twenty years had passed since her mother had died, but the story never got easier to tell. “My mom was sick for most of my childhood. She passed away on Christmas Eve, when I was eight. So for my dad, there’s been no joy in the Christmas season, only the reminder of what he lost.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  Lily nodded. “It’s okay.”

  “No, it’s not.” Reaching out, Aiden covered her hand with his. “I can’t imagine what that must have been like for your family. Do you have brothers and sisters?”

  “No. It’s just me.”

  “Please tell me your father at least tried to make Christmas special for you.”

  Lily couldn’t look at him. “You have to understand how much my parents loved each other. After my mother was gone, my dad became very depressed. He had no interest in anything, including me.”

  Aiden made a sound of disgust. “My parents were childhood sweethearts, and they’re still crazy about each other, but I’m certain that if anything happened to one of them, they’d be there for their kids in every way that mattered.”

  “I think he just couldn’t get out from under the weight of his own grief.”

  After watching her father suffer, Lily didn’t ever want to depend on another person for her happiness, the way her father had depended on her mother. Because if that person left her—or died—she didn’t want to experience the kind of pain her father had endured. So while she’d had several relationships since she’d been in the army, none of them had been all that serious, which was how she preferred it.

  “I shouldn’t pry, but...what was Christmas like for you after your mother passed away?”

  Lily thought back to those days. “Well, when I was a teenager, I tried to make Christmas something special. I decorated the house, my friends helped me put up a tree and I even cooked my dad’s favorite meal for Christmas dinner...but it didn’t make any difference. He didn’t care about decorations or presents under the tree or family and friends who wanted to help. He just shut himself away in his bedroom and wouldn’t come out until the holidays were over.”

  As a little girl, Lily had dreamed of a Christmas like the ones her friends had, filled with anticipation of what Santa might bring, of baking cookies and singing carols, of going to a candlelight church service on Christmas Eve. Even when her mother had been alive, she’d been too sick to give more than a nominal effort to celebrating Christmas. There had been a couple of years after her mom’s death when Lily’s grandparents had brought her to spend Christmas with them. She’d had a glimpse of what Christmas could be like then.

  “That’s rough,” Aiden said, pulling her back to the present. “Maybe you should come spend Christmas with my family.”

  Lily smiled uncertainly, even as her heart gave a little leap of joy, but in the next instant she decided he was just kidding. “Oh, yeah? Why is that?”

  Aiden shrugged, but one corner of his mouth lifted in a smile that could only be called indulgent. “My family tends to go overboard for the holidays. Picture Clark Griswold meets the guy from Elf.”

  Lily raised an eyebrow. “They like to decorate?”

  “That’s putting it mildly,” he said ruefully. “I think my dad’s ambition is to put enough lights on the house for it to be visible from outer space.”

  “Do you have a big family?”

  “I have an older brother with four kids, and a younger sister. She’s expecting her first baby in the spring. But they’ll both be at my parents’ house, with their spouses and kids.”

  “Wow. That sounds fun.”

  “I don’t know that I’d call it fun,” he protested, but his mouth curved in a smile. “Chaotic is more like it.”

  Lily was silent. There had been a time when she would have given anything to have a brother or sister. But as she’d gotten older, she’d been grateful that she didn’t have a sibling to suffer the same loss and disappointment that had marked her own childhood.

  She’d enlisted in the army right out of high school, and they had paid for her education and trained her to be a combat medic. In the ten years since, she’d only returned home a handful of times, and those had been strained. Did she want to go home for Christmas? She couldn’t think of anything more dismal.

  She forced herself to smile, envisioning Aiden at home, surrounded by his family—who would no doubt be ecstatic to have him back for the holidays.

  While he hadn’t expressed any outward emotion at the prospect of going home, he had been determined to buy Christmas gifts for his parents and siblings, first at the airport in Entebbe, and then at the military base in Germany. He’d chosen his gifts carefully: beautiful scarves and handcrafted items from Uganda, traditional wooden ornaments and tins of frosted cookies from Germany, along with bottles of mulled wine called glühwein.

  Lily had purchased a Bavarian-style hat and a box of fine cigars for her father, although she couldn’t imagine he’d have a use for either. As far as she could tell, he spent all his time tinkering in his garage, repairing small engines and appliances and then reselli
ng them. He rarely went anywhere, except to the local diner, where he ate nearly all his meals.

  “Chaotic,” she repeated now, aware her voice sounded a little wistful. “That actually sounds perfect.”

  She sensed Aiden watching her, but before he could respond, the aircraft pitched sharply, and Lily found herself thrown against Aiden’s shoulder. He steadied her, but even after the aircraft resumed a smooth path, he kept one hand wrapped warmly around her hers. This time, Lily didn’t pull away.

  “Yeah,” he replied, “my family does a good job of making the holidays memorable.”

  “You said your parents were childhood sweethearts,” she said, staring down at their linked hands. “And they’re still married. That’s really nice to hear.”

  “Yeah, it’s one of the reasons why I—” He broke off abruptly, looking embarrassed. “Never mind.”

  “No, tell me what you were going to say,” Lily insisted, smiling. She found his sudden discomfiture oddly appealing.

  “Nah, it’s...personal,” he muttered, clearly uncomfortable.

  Lily laughed. “Now I have to know—tell me.”

  He gazed at her, and something in his expression caused her heart to stutter in her chest.

  “I was going to say that my parents are my role models.” He lowered his voice so that only Lily could hear him. “A lot of the guys I know—guys in my unit—don’t mind casual relationships. They don’t want anything long-term. In fact, for some of them, all they want is a quick hookup.”

  Lily averted her gaze and chewed her lip. Was he referring to Brad Dixon? Brad had made it clear that he was interested in sleeping with Lily, but he’d never really tried to get to know her. Not that Lily had wanted him to—she had absolutely no interest in Brad.

  “So what are you saying?” she asked carefully.

  He bent his head until he was looking directly into her eyes. “I’m not one of those guys. I don’t do one-night stands, or casual relationships.”

  There was no denying the sincerity in his voice, and the knowledge should have made Lily happy. Instead, a sense of discouragement washed over her. Casual relationships—like the ones she had.