Soul's Survivor

by Navi' Robins

  It took the family almost an hour to calm Daniel and Ayana, but once they were calm, Mr. Bennett decided to speak to both of them alone in his office on the other side of the house. Ayana was still clutching Victoria’s picture in her arms, hugging it as if her baby were actually there.

  After gathering himself, Mr. Bennett sat across from them and began to speak.

  “How is it that neither of you knew that Victoria was also Ayana’s daughter?”

  Despite his hesitation, Daniel decided to tell his father the details of their relationship and all the drama that transpired after his “talk” with Satu. After he finished, Mr. Bennett got up from his chair and paced around the room for a few moments before returning to his seat.

  “You know, when I was much younger, I had the pleasure to meet Malcolm X twice—once when he was at the pinnacle of his career with the Nation of Islam, and again when he returned from Mecca. Being a die-hard Baptist, that was a miracle in itself, but my father was a supporter of Malcolm X, even though they disagreed on a few topics. The Malcolm X I met before his trip to Mecca and the one afterward were two entirely different men—both great men with a fire for justice and greatness but with different motivations.

  “The militant Malcolm was steadfast in his beliefs, and he had very little tolerance for anything that didn’t come out of the mouth of Elijah Muhammad. However, the Malcolm X I met later on was a changed man, and he told me something that stuck with me, even to this day. He said a man has to be humble enough to unlearn a lie in order to find himself, no matter how old he is or respected by his people. Son, I am saying the same thing to you. You have to unlearn the lie that has taken hold of your life since your ordeal in Africa.”

  “And what lie is that?”

  “God no longer exists after Victoria’s passing.”

  Ayana turned and looked at Daniel, surprised at what Mr. Bennett was saying about him. She knew he wasn’t a religious man, but she had no idea his ordeal turned him into an atheist.

  “Regardless of what may happen in this world, God must always be the center of our lives. Always. Before I turned my life and beliefs around to a doctrine of tolerance, love, and understanding, I would’ve never accepted my son as an atheist. Now, he’s still a heathen, but he’s my heathen, and as a man of God, I must humble myself to understand the pain of those that may not understand as I do and lose faith. What you endured over there was the definition of hell on earth. Anyone, and I do mean anyone, would question God’s existence after experiencing that kind of evil. To be honest, I can’t say if faced with a similar situation that my faith wouldn’t waver.

  “No one knows what someone would do in a situation unless they’ve lived through it, and as a person striving toward righteousness, I must show patience and empathy for that individual. That’s what tolerance is. Doesn’t mean we accept deviant behavior and make excuses for people’s wicked lifestyles. It means although we may not agree with it, we try to understand the root of such behavior. The problems of your relationship, Ayana, are deeply rooted in my son’s lack of faith in God and humanity. When you also consider the fact your relationship started with sex, you can see why things aren’t open and transparent between you two. One minute, you can’t stand each other, and the next, you are rolling around in the sheets, professing your love for each other.

  “That isn’t love. It’s lust, attempting to cover up the pain you both feel in a physical connection. Because if it were true love, you would’ve discovered that the two of you had a connection much deeper than you could possibly comprehend. With knowledge comes trust. No relationship can last and grow built on lies, sex, and secrets. As the man, son, you have to be an example of strength to your woman. There isn’t a stronger man than a humble man. It takes great strength to admit you are wrong and correct those wrongs. That level of humility will inspire your woman to be just as strong as her man.

  “I don’t subscribe to the belief that a woman is a weaker vessel than her man, and seeing the strength that’s inside Ayana proves my point. She is an incredibly strong woman to endure everything she’s gone through and still find a reason to smile. Very few people have that kind of inner strength. You two are also each other’s strength and weakness, and you have to right this ship before it sinks. There is no doubt in my mind that you and Ayana are meant to be together. Only God could bring you two together with neither of you knowing of the other’s connection to Victoria. There is hope for this relationship, but it’s time for you two to stop being afraid and let this love flourish. Now, I could say stop fornicating, but I’m a realist, and I know making you promise that would be inviting you to lie to my face. I will say this . . . It’s time for you two to start dating each other because what you’ve been doing wasn’t dating.

  “Son, I’m proud to see how far you’ve come. I’ve always been so proud of you, but since you’ve come back from Africa, I don’t know the man I raised any longer. It’s time for you to accept God and love back into your life. Because if not, this relationship won’t work, and that will be another tragedy you can add to your anger against God.”

  Mr. Bennett then got up and left them both in the office without saying another word.

  Ayana exhaled deeply and without looking at Daniel, asked, “Did you love her? Did you love her like she was your own?”

  “I loved her like she was my life and the only thing that mattered. She was my own, and I’m sorry I couldn’t keep her safe. I’m so sorry.”

  “You did your best, and it wasn’t your fault. None of this is. I want to thank you for giving my baby happiness and love for the short time she was on this earth. For that, I am eternally grateful.”

  Daniel remained silent as he replayed his father’s advice to both of them. Everything his father said was true, even the most hurtful parts, and Daniel knew that unless he regained his faith, he would lose Ayana, and there was only one way he felt he could accomplish it. He turned to Ayana and held her so that he could look her directly in the eyes and said, “I’m going to testify.”

  Chapter 18

  Prepare for the Worst . . .

  A week later, Daniel and Ayana traveled to New York to meet with Meagan and update her on Daniel’s decision to testify. After briefing Meagan on all the details she wasn’t aware of, Ayana held Daniel’s hand tightly as they sat next to each other facing Meagan. Meagan sat behind her desk, trying to calm her nerves and hold back the long list of obscenities she wanted to blast out at both of them.

  Finally, calming herself to an acceptable level, Meagan decided it was time to break the silence in the room.

  “You two have created a heaping helping of holiday shit, and you could’ve ruined this entire investigation with your lack of self-control. However, regardless of the unprofessional nature you two went about it, we still got the desired outcome and more. Doctor Bennett, I want to thank you for making this sacrifice to bring that monster to justice, and please make no mistake, this is going to be a huge sacrifice.

  “This trial is going to be a media circus, and now that we have an American that can testify and place him at the scene of a massacre, the madness will intensify quite swiftly. As soon as word gets out, your life will no longer be yours. You will become public property, and any slipup or actions that seem biased will make prosecuting Kronte more difficult than it’s already gonna be. So, I know you two know what’s coming next, right?”

  Daniel and Ayana nodded together. They already assumed that Meagan would advise them both to refrain from their “extracurricular” activities until the trial concluded. Meagan shook her head while looking away from them. Although they seemed aware of what she was about to say, she decided to tell them anyway. Just to make sure everyone was on the same page.

  “You two are going to have to stop seeing each other romantically until the trial is over. With a trial this big and so much at stake, I can’t tell you that it will be over quickly. Usually, trials like this can last anywhere between six months to six years. So—”


  After hearing the time frame, Daniel’s heart and the lower region went into panic mode, and he nearly leaped out of his chair.

  “Now, wait a minute! I understand what’s at stake here, but telling me I have to wait six years to be with the woman I love is pushing it!”

  Meagan had prayed silently that neither of them would object to her demands, allowing all those obscenities that were so eager to be let loose into the world to be locked away in her mind. But the doctor’s loud protest sent her mental controls on a tailspin, and her lips trembled as she tried to hold back her anger.

  “Doctor Bennett, please calm down,” she warned.

  “No, I will not calm down! Who do you think you are? We are not children. You can’t tell us when and where we can see each other.”

  At that very moment, Meagan had decided she’d had enough and jumped out of her chair, her voice blaring through the air.

  “If you would stop thinking about your dick for once in your life, you would see why you two can’t see each other! You are testifying for more than your own personal desire to see justice served to that monster. You are testifying to prevent that man from going free and intensifying his efforts to eradicate an entire nation of people! Now, I’m a white woman, an American white woman at that, and judging by this country’s history, I shouldn’t even be involved in African affairs. I shouldn’t even care if Africans kill each other, but I do! This man has murdered tens of thousands of men, women, and children throughout his campaign in that region.

  “His influence and arrogance are so great that he had the gall to send his second-in-command on US soil to intimidate you. We captured Kronte by sheer luck, and I fear if he goes free because you can’t keep it in your pants, we won’t get another opportunity. So, excuse me if I don’t have sympathy for your temper tantrum because you won’t be getting any more pussy from Ayana during this trial. I couldn’t care less. Masturbate—hell, get a hooker if it’s that bad! Under no circumstances are you two to see each other romantically or casually until this is over. I would hate for both of you to lose such great careers over something as basic as sex. If you can’t wait for her, Doctor, then you don’t deserve her. Now, if we can move on, there is something else I need from both of you.”

  Daniel’s mouth and eyes were wide open as he sat there, listening to Meagan read him like a children’s book. A small grin developed on Ayana’s face as she gave Daniel the “side eye” wondering what would drive him to act out like that. Ayana knew just how foul Meagan’s mouth could be, and she knew not to provoke it. She wasn’t happy about not being able to see the doctor until the trial was over, but she understood what was at stake. She knew that if Kronte went free, he would try to get rid of both of them to make sure no one with credibility could testify against him in the future. It was date nights, orgasms, and arguments . . . or life. The choice for Ayana was easy, but apparently, it wasn’t for Daniel. After Meagan’s tirade, things started to sink into the doctor’s head, and he retreated within himself as he slumped into his chair.

  He wanted to defend himself and make it known that his concern wasn’t the lack of lovemaking with Ayana, but his fear that with her away from him, the anxiety of the upcoming trial and a trip back to Africa might make his nightmares return and be more dangerous than before. However, he knew it wouldn’t make a difference. Meagan had already labeled him, and no words would change her view of him, only actions, so he decided to remain quiet and listen to what else she had to say.

  Seeing that the doctor was now hearing her instead of just listening, Meagan smiled and calmly sat down in her chair.

  “For us to place Kronte at the time and location of Victoria’s death, we will need you to be as detailed as possible. Don’t leave anything out. The more confident you sound, the more the council will believe your testimony. I understand from your testimony with the American Consulate, Doctor, you claimed that Kronte also participated in Victoria’s rape, correct?”

  Hearing Victoria’s name in the same sentence as Kronte shook the doctor to the core, and he braced himself for a roller-coaster ride of anger and pain as he tried to find the words to respond. Ayana, on the other hand, wasn’t so reserved, and she immediately started weeping. Meagan’s emotions began to get the best of her, seeing her friend in so much pain. She wanted to stop, but she knew they didn’t have much time, and she needed both of them focused.

  “Listen, I know this is difficult for both of you, but without your detailed accounts of that day, it’s going to be hard trying to prove you were there. Even if you, Doctor, are an American.”

  “What does my nationality have to do with my credibility?” the doctor asked while looking down at the floor, afraid to lift his head and see Ayana overcome with grief. He wanted to be stronger for her, but he knew he would lose that battle if he caught just one glimpse of her in such a state.

  “The International Court of Justice feels testimonies from foreign nationals of Sudan are more credible than those that are from the locals. Call it prejudice or unfair bias. It’s been a thorn in our side for years, but this time, that prejudice could, in fact, help our case against Kronte. But your relationship with Victoria as her adopted father and Ayana being her mother can damage our case if we don’t have other hard evidence. I know DNA was taken after the incident, but forensics have advanced since then, and we need to employ all the advancements at our disposal to take that man down. Kronte’s lawyers will try to discredit your verbal testimony by using Victoria’s murder against you, saying that you want someone to pay for her death, and Kronte is the most famous face you could find.

  “And make no mistake, they will find out Ayana is her mother, and if the two of you continue to see each other, it will look even worse. You have to understand that Kronte’s so-called freedom revolution is a $600 million a year weapons business for some of the most powerful arms dealers in the world. That’s a huge account for them, and they won’t let him go down without a fight. There are also rumors of Kronte working with some very powerful people that have their eyes on the oil under that country. It’s believed that all the land that he’s taken from the villagers he’s massacred has massive oil veins running under them.”

  “How anyone could sell that man weapons, knowing what he’s doing with them is beyond me,” Daniel stated.

  “It’s because no one really cares about the plight of Africa. As long as his weapons kill Africans, no one cares. Yeah, some celebrities may make a documentary, donate money that only 15 percent of it will actually go to the people, or give a shout-out while they accept an award, but that’s it. Why do you think no one pursued him after he attempted to kill you and killed Victoria? Remember, Victoria was an American citizen too, because you adopted her. He attacked two US citizens, leaving one dead, but just like you, she is a person of color, and the international community doesn’t take your suffering seriously.”

  Daniel looked up at Meagan with his eyebrows crumbled and head slightly turned. He couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of her mouth. A white woman was saying things that most white people would deny, giving validation to many people of color’s gripe about how those in power disregard their suffering and the injustices they face daily. Meagan noticed his confusion and giggled. She knew her statement would more than likely catch him off guard, but she meant every word.

  “Doctor, I can’t spearhead this trial if I don’t accept what’s real and what’s fantasy. I refuse to lend my intellect and talents to the notion that racism is dead and a conspiracy theory like Elvis and Area 51. Racism is definitely alive and well all over the world, and the fact that genocide is allowed to continue in Africa without UN intervention is a clear indication of that. Maybe this trial and Kronte’s conviction could help change that. Maybe when we present everything and then bring you into the equation, people will listen and take notice. I know more than likely they will notice temporarily and then move on after all the media coverage dies down, but for once, I would like the world to take things like t
his seriously. Just once, it would be an amazing thing. However, I know more than likely, it’s an impossible dream. But a girl can dream, can’t she?”

  Daniel shrugged his shoulders, still looking down at the floor and rubbing his hand on Ayana’s back, trying to console her.

  “I know this is a lot,” Meagan continued. “But we need both of your permissions to continue. We need more forensic evidence from Victoria.”

  Daniel and Ayana remained silent, neither of them able to open their mouths and give Meagan permission to disturb Victoria’s grave. It was a horrible decision to make, and neither wanted to be the first to speak. Seeing their state of mind, Meagan decided to leave the office and give them time to decide. As she began to move from behind her large desk, Ayana nodded silently while squeezing Daniel’s hand so tightly that he could feel his bones in his hand grinding together. Gritting his teeth from the sudden sharp pain, he looked over just in time to see her nodding her head in agreement. He wanted to scream “No” and go on an office-destroying rampage. He wanted to curse Kronte, God, and everyone that remained alive while his baby girl lay lifeless in the ground. He wanted to do so many destructive things, but he decided against all of them. Instead, he closed his eyes slowly and nodded his head in agreement. Meagan watched them both in unified pain, and it broke her heart. She couldn’t even imagine the pain and confusion going through them.

  She also admired their bravery. She knew what she was asking wasn’t an easy request, but it was necessary. Before leaving the office, she wanted to ask them if they wanted to be present during the exhumation but decided against it. She didn’t want to upset either of them any further. It was going to be a long, hard road ahead, and the last thing she wanted was to throw another boulder on their shoulders.

  A few weeks later, Daniel’s life immediately began to tailspin into a media madhouse. As soon as the word got out about the American doctor that would be testifying against one of the world’s most notorious warlords, his phone became a never-ending portal of talk-show invitations and interview requests. It’d gotten so bad that Meagan appointed a publicist for him. At first, the attention was overwhelming, but soon it became his new normal, and sometimes he found himself enjoying it. Meagan and Ayana made sure they coached him on how to answer or not answer certain questions concerning his intentions and expectations on the upcoming trial.