The Vine Cross (The Vine Series Book 1)

by S P Dawes

  “Are you sure about this?” Jesse rasped.

  Hayley smiled up at him, thankful; just for checking she was OK. She bit his bottom lip, pulling him towards her gently. Taking that as a green light, he grabbed her buttocks, forcing her up, before falling on the bed. When she landed, she giggled, pulling his head down to kiss his lips.

  “You’re beautiful, absolutely beautiful,” said Jesse.

  “Show me,” she whispered. “Show me what you want to do.”

  “Hayley, I want you under me, screaming my name. I want you writhing in ecstasy. I want you to feel everything. I want to see you come apart and then I want to put you back together again. Jesus, Hayley, I want to go so slow because I know you deserve it, but right now all I want to do is make you come.”

  Breathing heavily, Hayley wasn’t sure how to feel about that declaration. No one had ever spoken to her like that before, and she wasn’t sure whether to feel repulsed or outraged. But right now, with Jesse on top of her, staring into her eyes with hunger and lust, she only felt turned on. She wasn’t sure what that made her, but she wanted to absorb every bit of what Jesse was offering.

  “Jesse, I don’t know what I’m doing,” she explained, hoping he wouldn’t be too disappointed in her.

  “I’ll show you sweetheart, let me show you.” She nodded and watched as he lapped at her nipples, gently manipulating the globe to give him better purchase, as he dragged the cup of her bra down to reveal them to him.

  Every nerve-ending fired. Every cell blew, and every hair stood on end as he traced her skin with his fingertips. Tracing his hands to her hips, he slid his hand between her thighs until he could feel her warmth. Feeling her tense, he slid down her body and kissed her stomach. The moment he felt her relax under him again, he parted her legs and moved his fingers between her lips, until she bucked off the bed.

  Barely breathing, but panting and gasping, she could feel him between her legs but daren’t look. Holding her lids tightly closed, she tried to just feel and block everything else out. No one had spent so much attention on her pleasure, and she felt embarrassed to be in such a compromising position. She’d had sex before, but she never had to do anything before. Jesse was expecting big things from her and she didn’t want to disappoint him. None of this made any sense. Why wasn’t he just sticking it in? That’s what sex was, wasn’t it?

  “You’re thinking too hard,” he said from above her. “Let go.”

  “I can’t,” she answered, shaking her head.

  Jesse stilled as a tear slipped from her closed eyelid and wondered what he was doing wrong to make her cry? Grasping the back of her neck, he gently pulled her head until she opened her eyes. Seeing them watery almost broke his heart in two.

  “Hayley, why are you crying?”

  “I ca... I can’t...” Hayley gasped, wiping her cheek, feeling the tears there.

  “Tell me what’s wrong. We don’t have to do this,” said Jesse rolling off her to lean on his side.

  “I want to,” explained Hayley feeling empty without his body on hers. “I just... I just don’t...” Hayley tried to look away, but Jesse clasped her jaw in his hand, making her look at him. “I don’t know how to do this,” she cried.

  Feeling like an idiot, she tried to move her face again, but Jesse pulled her back. “Listen to me. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You’re stunning and I need nothing in order to get off; looking at you is just about killing me already. But this isn’t about me, this about you. It’s important to me you enjoy this just as much as me. I want to see you come, because then I know I’ve done a good job. The onus is on me, not you.”

  “What if I can’t?” She asked.

  Jesse had to fight hard not to laugh, so he didn’t ridicule her vulnerability and naivety. “Come here.” he said laying on his back, patting his thigh.

  Looking at him quizzically, she took his hand as he guided her to his lap. Sitting just above his knees, she could see his impressive manhood but tried to keep eye contact with Jesse.

  Feeling her stiffen at the sight of what was in front of her, Jesse ran his hands down her sides and back up again, until he could feel her melt into his touch again. Gently pulling her hips towards him, she shifted until she was directly above his cock and he had to bite his lip in order to stop the rush of blood taking over. Leaning up, he took the back of her head in his hand and kissed her.

  The moment his lips touched hers, she knew she’d sat on a runaway train. Nothing was going to stop the inevitable. She could feel him under her, and the repulsion she usually felt was nowhere near. As he held her tongue hostage, tangling with seduction and lust, she gently ground down on him, eliciting a gasp from Jesse which she never thought she’d find so endearing.

  After a few more thrusts, eliciting yet more pants and grunts, Jesse took matters into his own hands. Lining himself up with her entrance while she lifted to her knees, giving him space. Thrusting upwards whilst he pushed her down, she cried out.

  “Oh my God, you feel amazing,” he rasped.

  Once he could feel her moving to their rhythm, he lowered himself back to the bed and clasped her hands in his. Watching her move her hips with her eyes closed, building a rhythm and a pace he knew was getting her where she needed to be, he relaxed. He could watch her take him all day.

  As the swirl in her stomach took over, she gasped, moving quicker, chasing the place her body told her she needed to be. No longer worried about how she looked or whether she was pleasing Jesse, her pleasure became the only thing that mattered. Unable to remember ever feeling like that before she wanted to cry.

  As the feeling built, everything tightened, until she felt like a human atom bomb ready to blow. “Oh my god, Jesse!”

  “It’s OK baby, go with it,” he cried out, feeling her body tighten around him like a vise.

  “Oh God!” she chanted. Moving fiercely whilst chasing the destination.

  Warmth consumed her entire body, sending every nerve-ending into seizure. Unable to take anymore, she screamed out. Stopping, she could feel Jesse growl, releasing into her, as her body continued to shake. Coming down from the biggest high she has ever felt was mesmerising. Her limbs no longer felt like they belonged to her, and she couldn’t move them. Staying put, she could feel the pulse between her legs. Breathing in gasps, she opened her eyes to see a delighted Jesse beneath her. Looking far too happy with himself, which made her laugh.

  “Now for round two.” said Jesse, tossing her to the bed and climbing over her.

  Hayley laid on her back, staring up at the ceiling. She’d never felt like that before, and she couldn’t wipe the silly grin off her face, even if she wanted to. How had she never experienced that before? She was sure she was floating on air.

  Jesse leant up on his left arm, looking at her as she focused on something above them. He couldn’t help the smirk, watching her breath. He wasn’t sure what thoughts were racing round her head, but they looked like happy ones, if he could believe the slight upward curve of her mouth.

  “You OK?” He asked.

  Turning to him her smile widened. “More than,” she whispered, rolling onto her side to face him, with eyes shining.

  “I wasn’t expecting that,” admitted Jesse, tracing a fingertip down her arm.

  “Didn’t hear you complaining,” she coyly replied.

  Jesse just shook his head, before leaning in to kiss her shoulder. “Do they hurt?” referring to her scars, she shook her head. “Sorry I didn’t mean to bring them up.”

  “Don’t worry about it, you’ve seen them now, and kissed them,” she grinned. She never thought someone could elicit pleasure to her by using the ugly scars that the rest of the time just drew fear into her. But he had rained kisses on them as if to erase them, and him seeing them suddenly became no big deal. He hadn’t shied away from them, been shocked or made her feel broken. He’d simply enjoyed every part of her body, and she’d revelled in the attention.

  “You’re beautiful with or without them.”
Kissing him again, she ran her fingers down his chest.

  “It’s never felt like that before,” she confessed.

  “What do you mean?” asked Jesse, curiously.

  Hayley couldn’t say it, she felt silly, embarrassed even. Biting her lip, she willed herself to open up. She trusted him, and he needed to know that.

  “I never knew it could feel like that.” Hayley couldn’t look at him; she watched her finger trace a figure eight on his chest.

  Jesse leant over and whispered in her ear. “Do you mean you’ve never had an orgasm?”

  She’d never enjoyed sex before, it was simply something that happened, or was an expectation of her. Pleasure hadn’t come into it, at least not for her. But with Jesse, it had been different. She had wanted to be with him more than anything. She wanted to give herself over to him, needed to please him and make sure he knew she felt something too. But she hadn’t expected the feelings, the emotions, the explosion that had gone off in her body, the warm swell of something that made her lose control so that her bones no longer had substance.

  “Wow.” He mouthed as he laid down on his back, staring at the ceiling.

  “Thanks. You’re really making me feel better about it,” she answered sarcastically.

  “I feel like a million dollars.” He commented, looking across to her with an enormous grin on his face.

  She tried not to laugh but couldn’t help it, so she grabbed the pillow from underneath her and flung it at his head. “OK, stop being such a big head!”

  Hayley laid back down, tracing her finger down the side of his face. “Will you stay?” she didn’t want him to leave her on her own tonight.

  “I could, but neither of us making it home will look suspect,” he clarified.

  “Yeah, but we said we were at different parties, didn’t we?” She moved towards him, kissing his lips, then his neck and ear, trying to lure him into staying. “Besides, if we went home with separate people then they’ll not think we’re together.”

  “Keep doing that and I’ll be going nowhere.” Licking his bottom lip, he grabbed her wrists, pushing her back down on the bed, kissing her shoulders and neck, she let out a moan.

  “We need to let them know, or they’ll worry all night.”

  He sighed, he didn’t want to move, but he knew he should. “We shouldn’t do it at the same time though.”

  “Thought we just had,” she teased, laughing he straightened up. “Me first, then you can take the wrath of telling them late.” She laughed, jumping for her handbag that had her phone in.

  Jesse lay back on the bed chuckling, watching her bound about like a puppy.

  Grabbing her mobile, she found Marie’s number that Rob had given her and sat back down. ‘Staying over at friends, see you tomorrow.’ She sent the text through while Jesse ran his fingers down her back, tracing the lines of the scares the whip had made.

  He had been unprepared for the devastation; they were angry, vicious marks. He couldn’t understand anyone wanting to inflict so much pain on her. And then to add a brand; the pain she must have suffered made him want to burn him to the ground. But he had held it together, despite the shock he’d swallowed down. Tonight, had been about her, and she needed to feel loved, not judged. But he swore on seeing them that if he ever caught the guy, he’d kill him.

  “So, when did Rob tell you?” Asked Hayley, feeling his gentle touch caress the most painful time of her life.

  “Rob? What do you mean?” Turning to him, she narrowed her eyes.

  “You’ve spoken to him?”

  Jesse shook his head, wondering why she was bringing him up. Leaning forward to kiss her cheek, she pulled away. “So… how...?”

  “What’s wrong?” Jesse wasn’t sure what he’d said, but she looked defensive and worried.

  “If Rob hasn’t told you, how do you know about my back?”

  Jesse hung his head; they’d crossed wires. Suddenly dawning on him; she thought Rob had told him. How was he going to explain Nick?

  “How does Rob know?” Asked Jesse, worrying that something had happened between Hayley and his brother.

  “He saw me in the locker room, I had oil spilt down me the other week and it soaked through my T-shirt, I didn’t realise he was there. More to the point though, how did you know?”

  Jesse couldn’t think of a single way of getting out of it without explaining what he’d done. But now, in bed with her, he was regretting not coming clean earlier. There was no scenario that told him there was a good way of getting out of this. Sitting up, he looked her in the eyes, ready for the onslaught. “I spoke with Nick.”

  Hayley’s eyes widened like a deer in the headlights; seconds later she was grabbing her clothes off the floor and getting dressed.

  “What are you doing?” He asked calmly.

  “What the hell for?” She screeched.

  Jesse, dropped his arms, deflated. He’d betrayed her, even when he hadn’t meant to. Jesse knew he should have been straight with her. He had known how fragile she was, how could he have been so stupid to have let this happen.

  “Hayley, stop!”

  Hayley glared at him.

  He would regret this, but he had to be honest with her, she deserved that much. “Sit down, please, I need you to know. I swear I just want to be honest with you. If you don’t like what I say, I’ll leave.”

  Hayley didn’t know what to do. Part of her wanted to run and hide.

  Sitting on the bed, Jesse could see she was shaking. He hated himself for being the one to frighten her. Deciding this was better done with him dressed, he quickly pulled his trousers on and knelt before her. She was turning her knuckles white, holding onto her garments.

  “After Rob told me about the rumours going around work, I took it upon myself to see if they were true.” He held his hands in the air. “I know, I crossed the line. I shouldn’t have. It had absolutely nothing to do with me or my investigations. I told myself I was just trying to protect Rob, but I think it was because, even then, I liked you. I couldn’t allow myself to fall for someone who could do something like that. I needed to be sure.”

  Hayley could understand that, so her temper subsided.

  “I spoke with Nick.”

  Hayley dropped her head in her hands. He really knew everything. “And you’re still here?” She asked solemnly, not wanting to cry. If Nick had told him his side of the story, he’d have painted her out as a liar, and a cheat. So why had Jesse slept with her? What was he expecting from her? Had she just walked into a trap?

  “He told me about the attack, but he also explained why you said it was him.” Tears fell down Hayley’s face.

  “I didn’t want to,” she cried.

  Grabbing hold of her, he let her soak his chest with her tears as she crumpled onto his shoulder.

  “I know, he told me what they said.” Stroking her hair, he added, “That’s how I knew about your back.”

  Just then her phoned pinged. Picking it up, she glanced at the screen.

  “It’s your mum, ‘Thanks for letting me know.’” Absently smiling at her phone, showing him her anger had dissipated, she asked, “Do they know?”

  Jesse shook his head. “I’ve not told them a thing.”

  Glancing at her, she looked distraught. “I think it’s probably best I go.” Glancing over to her, she sat on the bed watching him finish getting dressed.

  “I didn’t plan this,” he said swirling his finger around in front of him. Pulling his shirt on, buttoning it up, he slipped his socks on and shuffled his feet in his shoes after fastening his belt. Grabbing his keys and phone, he stuffed them in his pocket before threading his arms through his jacket. “I still need to pick you up tomorrow. Is that going to be OK?”

  “Don’t go,” she said, almost inaudible.

  “Pardon?”

  “Don’t go.”

  Jesse could feel his heart beating loudly in his chest. “I don’t want you to.”

  This time she looked up at him. Jesse f
roze to the spot. Standing up, she clutched the sheet to her, having dropped her clothes to the floor. Walking over to him, she gently lifted his fingers from the door handle, looking into his eyes.

  “I don’t...” but Jesse had already locked on, kissing her passionately without fear of being pushed away. Leaping up into his arms, she held onto him with all her being, and he took her back to bed.

  Making her way downstairs, tip toeing gently so she couldn’t be heard. She crept around every doorway until she saw him, bent over her mother’s lifeless form, lying motionless, like a paper bag strewn on the floor, discarded. But he was weeping, his body jolting as the tears ran. It felt different this time. Final. Something had changed. She shivered, but she wasn’t sure if it was the cold or the atmosphere. Suddenly he turned, spying her through the gap between the frame and the door. He stood up and walked over. She froze, she could only watch as he got closer.

  “Hayley… Hayley?”

  Opening her eyes, Jesse’s face was the first thing she saw, looking worried.

  “You were dreaming.”

  She couldn’t shake the memory, but part of her wanted to go back. It was the last time she’d seen her mother.

  Jesse was still staring at her. Grabbing his hand, she tried to tell him she was OK, but she was far from it.

  “Are you OK?”

  Nodding, knowing how fake it felt, she didn’t think she was convincing anyone. Sitting up, she rubbed her face, holding her eyelids down as she clung to the images.

  “Do you have them a lot?”

  Shaking her head, she tried to concentrate on the details, while the picture faded.

  “Hey, come here.” Jesse manoeuvred her, so she was spooning with him, his chin on her shoulder, his arms wrapped around her stomach.

  “I’ve got you,” he whispered. “Always.”

  Chapter 15

  Hayley awoke in the same position she’d fallen asleep in.