Yours To Love Yours To Take

by Reshma Ranjan

  He nodded his head with a smile at her.

  Then suddenly he remembered something and excused himself and went out. She was feeling overly ravenous, most probably because the food was prepared by Aayi. Surendra returned after fifteen to twenty minutes, a little worried.

  “Is everything ok?” Anita asked

  He gave a noncommittal response.

  Soon he brought his laptop and started making calls and working. She went to her collection of books to see if there was something she had yet to read. She saw the ones Ananya had brought for her the last time she had come home. She felt the prick of tears in her eyes. She was thankful Surendra was busy and wouldn’t notice her. She slid down on the floor, the tears streaming silently as always. She had the book open in her arms and her back facing towards the front section of the room.

  Surendra gave a glance now and then but he let her be. In the morning when Anita had not responded to his calls or opened the door, he had thought she was sleeping. A couple of times he had banged on the door and when he got no response he had become very anxious. Finally, when even after wild and loud banging she didn’t open the door he had started to dread, and the first thing he did was to call Salim.

  “I swear to God that if anything happens to Anita I will happily kill you and go to jail.” he had said, even before Salim could say ‘hello.’

  “Who the hell…”

  “I am Surendra, and damn it! . . .” he was breathing hard. He had pulled out everything in his car dashboard to look for the spare keys to Anita’s house.

  “What the hell happened? Where is she, Surendra?” Salim was shouting by now. “Tell me, man, where is Anita?” Salim could feel Surendra was doing something anxiously, breathing hard. “What the hell happened?”

  Salim had prayed after a very long time. Please God, let his Anita be all right.

  “She is not opening the door, damn it!” Surendra had answered. Then Salim heard him swear again. “Pray to God nothing happens to her as I will surely kill you before she becomes cold.”

  ~~~*~~~

  A chill had run down Salim’s spine. He had felt as if all the blood had drained from his body. It was Chotu, the ward boy, who saw Salim becoming pale and knew this was not good. He had immediately called Milind. He knew it was something related to Anita as he had heard Dr. Salim scream her name and then going completely white.

  Milind had asked immediately to give his phone to Salim. It took a couple of shouts to get Salim back to reality and he spoke like a robot. Immediately Milind had taken charge.

  “Bro, I am on the way. Please give the phone to Chotu.” He paused as he heard the phone being passed. “Chotu! I am on the way. If Salim is in his office room make sure no one else comes in until I do. Tell them his shoulder is acting bad, ok?” Chotu gave an affirmative response. “I am on my way, Chotu! Please make sure he is fine, OK? “

  “Yes, Milind bhai.”

  Milind had halted at his aunts’ house. He had just woken up and was chatting over a cup of tea with Sujal and Piyush. Feeling the tension, Sujal and Piyush exchanged glances. Just last night Milind had given them the whole account of how Salim had ended up married and now completely smitten to Anita.

  Sujal and Piyush didn’t take even a fraction of a second to decide to go along with Milind. They decided to keep it from their respective moms Dia and Mia or they wouldn’t think twice before jumping in with them too. But they wanted to know the situation before they informed the ladies. They had rushed saying something had come up and that they would be back soon.

  The cousins reached the hospital in record time. Milind thanked God that Salim had cut down on his operations. Sujal wished he was closer to his brother so that he would have been able to provide the support when he had gone through so much pain. But he was glad Salim got a spouse like Anita. The cousins hoped all was ok with Anita. They knew Salim wouldn’t be able to come out of this loss if anything happened to Anita.

  Milind had immediately checked for flights and got them booked. He called Chotu.

  “Hey Chotu, please tell him I will be in the parking lot in about ten minutes. You bring him down please.” Then he heard the phone being snatched from Chotu.

  “I am not invalid Milind, and I heard what you said.” Salim’s voice was gruff. “I will come down but I need to inform here about my absence first.”

  “Doctor Sahib, I am coming with you.” Milind heard Chotu’s voice in the background.

  “What?”

  “Please! I want to meet Anita didi.”

  “Milind can you arrange another ticket?”

  “Yeah. You just come down fast, bro!”

  The airport officials sensed their fear and gloominess and immediately guided them to their gate of departure. They were the last to board the flight and were soon airborne. No one spoke. Salim was trying to blank out everything. He had not even noticed the presence of Sujal and Piyush. A dread was building in his mind. He couldn’t even use the phone to ask about Anita. Soon they landed in Chandigarh and thanked God when Milind told them that the connecting flight was flying immediately. Milind called someone as they literally rushed through the airport. Here as well they managed to catch the flight at the last minute. When they finally landed at the Jabarhatti airport in Shimla, the old man next to Salim patted his hand. Salim acknowledged with a quick nod.

  They rushed out to hail a cab and soon Milind gave them the address.

  Chapter 16

  Agony, meeting and contentment

  The cab stopped by Anita’s house. Milind wanted to check here before he went to Surendra’s house. He had promised Surendra he would take care of Anita. But now he felt the sweat dripping down his neck. Before he could say anything, Salim got out and dashed into the house. The door was hanging in an odd way and the lock was broken. Salim dashed in to find Surendra stretching, loads of papers and laptop on the table. Then he found Anita sitting by a large book shelf. He was by her side in a second and pulled her up.

  First shock and then surprise hit her face as Salim pulled her and kissed her hard. His fingers dug into her arms. There was nothing passionate or sexual in his kiss. It was a statement, his trying to make sure she indeed was in his arms and his lips could feel hers. Slowly loosening his hand, he cupped her face. His eyes held pain, disbelief, and were moist. Her eyes reflected his pain. She knows how to pull my pain and absorb it in her, he thought.

  She cupped his face and raised his chin asking him, “What happened?” This time she didn’t have to use sign language. His grip loosened and held her hands which were cupping his face and took turns kissing each palm.

  ~~~*~~~

  Anita had never expected Salim here. She had no clue why was he looking so haphazard. But his eyes were giving her hope. She had accepted that he would never reciprocate her feelings. She didn’t want to build her hopes in vain. So she had always thought that she loved him and wanted to free him from the burden of their relationship. But here, now, his eyes, his lips, his hands were telling a different story.

  Surrender was shocked to see Salim here looking like a mad man. He had dashed in and without even acknowledging his presence went to Anita. One moment she was on the floor and the next in his arms. This was the second time he had seen Salim kiss Anita like that. The first time he had believed her to be Ananya but now he seemed to be kissing Anita. He felt awkward seeing the intimate moment between the couple. There was nothing sexual about it but it was so emotional that the atmosphere was tense and he could feel the attachment the couple shared.

  Salim was happy Anita was there in his arms, so close to him he could feel her warmth. He didn’t want her to ever be away from him.

  He closed his eyes and sighed audibly.

  “Salim” Anita’s broken voice called out his name.

  He didn’t open his eyes.

  “Salim” This time Anita was louder.

  This time he did open his eyes and smiled a content smile. He realized her voice was like ambrosia for his ears. How he w
ould willingly die hearing her voice! He loved hearing his name

  “You are finally in my arms.”

  She let him hold her in an embrace. She sensed he needed to feel her presence. She didn’t have a clue why but she knew he did. Then she remembered Surendra’s state in the morning. He must have called Salim. She pushed him a little and then looked at Surendra narrowing her eyes.

  Surendra shrugged, “Sorry!” Then Salim looked at Surendra. He didn’t feel angry or violent because a lot of things came into perspective. Milind and the group, who had witnessed the couples meeting, came in. Milind joined Surendra and patted his back lightly. Surendra gave him a quick hug. Milind introduced Sujal, Piyush and Chotu.

  “Anita, are you ok?” Sujal asked. Piyush and Sujal went closer to the couple. They went to give her a hug but seeing Salim was not leaving her, they gave her a pat on the back. Milind just gave a nod of relief. When Chotu asked her well-being she nodded in affirmative and smiled and tousled the young boy’s hair. Salim was still not letting her go. He still held her.

  Surendra realized it was his cue to explain so he did. Anita shook her head as if miffed by a kid’s explanations.

  “Sorry Salim!” Surendra didn’t want to say it but this man had literally flown to come here the moment he had called. “I was distraught and I don’t know . . .” He let his fingers comb through his hair. “I shouted and banged the door pretty violently yet she didn’t open the door. That upset me for sure and . . .” He shrugged sheepishly. “I called you. To add it up, her sudden presence here had me worried that there might have been some issues between you. I just called you and said what not, I don’t remember as I rummaged through my car to check if I had a key for the house. But then I had given the very key to Anita when she had come. I was feeling helpless and insane with anger and fear. Thank god you weren’t near me.”

  “I wouldn’t have stopped you, Surendra!”

  Surendra looked at Salim. There was a calm he had never seen in his eyes or face before. He was resigned to the fact that if anything had happened to Anita, he would have accepted any punishment whether he was responsible or not.

  “Errr . . . then I kicked the door with force and it broke,” he said shrugging. “And I found her sleeping, fighting hard not to wake up and . . .” He paused before he spoke, “Anita called out aloud.” Watching for everyone’s reaction he grasped that except for Chotu everyone else seemed to know. “She is adamant she won’t speak, except…” he lifted his hands in exasperation yet with a smile, “she spoke to you now!”

  Soon they all relaxed and every one noticed how Salim was still holding Anita.

  Anita showed signs to everyone to wait and that she will quickly make lunch.

  “I have never tasted anything you have cooked” Salim said.

  She smiled at Salim’s statement. “I will cook now!” She gestured.

  Salim shook his head and held her hands. “Some other day, sweetheart! Now sit by my side.”

  Surendra got up. “Hey, we all can go and eat absolutely delicious homemade food made by our Aayi.”

  Milind stood up first. “I am hungry, let’s go.”

  Everyone stopped from getting up as they heard Anita clap. She motioned to the broken door and stood with her hands on her hip, narrowing her eyes at Surendra.

  Immediately raising his hands in surrender, Surendra said, “I have asked my assistant to take care of that. They can put some temporary door till they deliver the new one. So until the door is fixed you guys can stay at my house. I hope you do have a couple of days to stay at Anita’s maika.”

  Anita was about to say something when she heard what Surendra said and smiled. She couldn’t deny Surendra that. He was the only family left. Soon everyone started for Surendra’s home in his car. Milind excitedly started chatting with Surendra about his Land Rover and its performance and joined him in the front. Salim insisted to take the back seats of the seven-seater. Everyone was surprised as he didn’t like to sit at the back with his long legs getting crammed up in the confined space. It would have been ok for Anita but for Salim the leg space was restricting. And here he was, volunteering to sit there. Salim still held her hand. He just sat there without speaking much. His calm was now scaring her. The only thing he had said was that he had never tasted her cooking. And again he had not allowed her to leave.

  Chapter 17

  Calm, content and cuddle

  After lunch everyone was in the living area, chilling around and talking. Salim had again pulled Anita next to him. Aayi had smiled when Anita protested to go and help her. Salim had looked at Aayi almost pleadingly to let her be with him. Sulochana had made Anita sit beside Salim. She had expected Salim would rush her to privacy; instead, he seemed relaxed with her beside him. They all had lots to catch up with. All seemed to be enjoying the calm and a relaxing day for a change on a weekday. When Aayi came and told something in Surendra’s ears, Surendra nodded. Soon she was back in a couple of minutes and told they all can go and have shut eyes since they all have had a tiring day travelling all the way from Bangalore. Just before Surendra took them to show their respective rooms, Aayi called Anita for some help. Surendra showed Salim to a corner room a little away from the crowd. They both were alone for the first time.

  “Don’t let the sparkle of life and that mysterious smile on her lips fade away, always be with her, Salim” Surendra said emotionally. Salim gave him a hug.

  “I promise you, I will be with her throughout my life.”

  They patted each other’s back and Salim went inside the room. He suddenly felt incomplete. He didn’t want to let Anita go but Aayi had called for a help and he couldn’t stop her. That would have been rude. Now the room felt too big and lonely and he wanted Anita by his side. Walking around, he saw a patio and went outside.

  The rooms given to all of them were on the top floor of the mansion. It had an excellent view of the beautiful hill-station lying below. Now he knew why the British had made Shimla their summer capital. He stood there, enjoying the beauty. He felt an odd peace engulf him and he turned to see Anita standing behind him. He smiled and motioned her to come to him. She went to him with a smile. Sliding her hands into his, she stood close to him. Squeezing her hand, he stood there for few minutes. Taking her with him, he closed the glass door to the Patio and pulled her along with him onto the bed. He didn’t say a word. She didn’t mind the silence and soon she felt his even breathing. Smiling, she realized she felt more at home with his arms around her and her head resting on his chest. Soon Anita also drifted into a content sleep.

  She felt cold, but still, warmth enveloped her. She smiled and was about to get up when he pulled her back, nuzzling the tender skin behind her ears. She tried again but he pulled her back again. It was dark and she couldn’t tell him that they needed to switch on the light with her hands trapped.

  “Salim!” She could feel him smile even in the dark.

  “Hmmm?”

  “Light?”

  “Why should we need light?”

  “It’s dark.”

  “Yes, I know. So what?” “To see”

  Her tongue in cheek answer piqued his interest. With a quick turn he had her under him. His lips brushed against her ears.

  “To see what, hon?”

  She tilted her head and kissed the rough skin on his cheeks.

  “God I had missed you like crazy. “

  “Me too” she said.

  He stopped and looked at her face in the dark.

  “Damn! You are right, woman! I need light to see your face when it darkens in passion, especially when you say such naughty stuff. It just heightens my need to hear your voice.”

  He rose and went to turn on the light. He turned to see her still on the bed, her hair half out of her braid, her eyes sleepy. He wanted to devour her then and there. Instead of jumping on her and making passionate love, he just gathered her in his arms and held her close and rocked. Soon he had her back on the bed and his body cocooned hers.

&nb
sp; Chapter 18

  Insight, confession and love

  Anita was noticing this side of Salim since he had come back. She had expected an outburst of anger for scaring him by coming to Shimla without informing him. When he had just pulled her and kissed her, she had felt that tingly feeling in her stomach His calmness was making her uncomfortable as she couldn’t understand this part of him. When he was a stranger she had understood him so easily. Now she was so close to him, she loved him, but she couldn’t understand him.

  “Do you know I was adopted by my mother?”

  She nodded.

  “Who told you?”

  His hands held her tight. Her own hands were locked in the embrace. She had no other way but to speak.

  “Milind.”

  “I got a good house, good upbringing and learned how to respect others and love my family. But when I grew up I wanted my own space. Mom supported me. Do you remember meeting them in hospital?”

  She nodded and smiled. “I don’t forget faces- and names- easily.”

  He was still mesmerized by her voice.

  “Sujal is my brother and Piyush is my cousin. He is Aunt Mia’s son.”

  She nodded. “Big family!”

  He smiled. “Yes, big family. Who else do you remember?”

  She squinted as she thought. “Sia, your aunt” she giggled. “Piyush and Sujal, Grandma, Suhaan Uncle, the Caucasian girl, your mother and Mia aunty.”

  He laughed. She liked it when she felt the rumbling of his chest as he held her.

  “God! So I am saved from introducing my crazy family to you.

  She shrugged.

  “So the story goes that I had my share of relationships, if you can call them that or just hook ups. I always made sure the ground rule was clear that it will be temporary and whenever one wanted to get out of it they were free to. Usually, it was easy. My silence and monosyllabic answers were not that appealing. So usually, the relationships ended before two or three weeks. Few women stayed for just a weekend or so.”