Earth Goddess

by Crystal Inman

  The affluent customers didn’t gawk and stare. That wasn’t their forte. They would discreetly glance over or use one of the mirrors to check out others’ comings and goings. Uncomfortable to say the least.

  Most of the influential members of the small community noted May and her companion. The rumor mill would spin full force in the next twenty-four hours. The irony of the situation not lost on May. She would be having lunch with the local rich and a highly successful agent. Something she spent most of her life avoiding.

  William patted her hand, and she looked up at him.

  “You owe me,” she whispered.

  He laughed and shook his head. “I’ll buy that expensive dessert for you, and we’ll call it even.”

  “Hedonist,” she muttered and ducked her head.

  William grinned. “It’ll be a lunch I’m sure I’ll never forget.”

  * * * *

  May had to admit that lunch had been nice. There was actually a service elevator that led to the private lounge upstairs so she didn’t have to take the stairs. She and William split a large steak and ate salad. When William ordered the extravagant dessert, May simply rolled her eyes. It didn’t stop her from dipping her spoon in for a taste, though.

  She dropped William off after lunch and drove back to her house. He tried to make his case over their meal, and May listened. What neither he nor anyone else would ever understand is how it made her feel to see her pain on display for everyone.

  The reality stretched all along her leg, over her hip, and her breast.

  May pulled into her driveway with a head full of thoughts. Almost three o’clock. Three more hours, and it would be dinner time with Chandler.

  Let’s see. She hadn’t dated in almost two decades. Now she had two dates in one day. William had been nice. Certainly easy to be around. And there had been a spark there. Not to mention, he was in his early thirties. He also knew about her past and apparently had no problem with her disability. And the admission about her walker still cracked her up.

  “Perv,” she muttered and grinned.

  May unlocked her patio door and turned off the alarm.

  Then there was Chandler.

  May flushed and looked at her kitchen table. He was infatuated, that was all. He had no idea what being involved with her would mean.

  “A crush,” she murmured.

  William would stay until Monday to wait for her decision. Then he had to fly to Greece to oversee a new client’s promo tour. And May still didn’t have a clue what to do about the project he wouldn’t let go of. He gave her one more week after that. And then he would have to let the writers know what she wanted to do.

  “I don’t know what I want to do.” May blew out a breath. Lately there had been no time to remotely manage her own yard much less a project the size of the one William proposed.

  She threw her leftovers into the refrigerator and shut the door slowly. May rested her head against the cool white door with a sigh. Her world changed exponentially, and she simply hoped she could keep up.

  * * * *

  May took a leisurely bath and wrapped a baby blue bath towel around herself. Her brown hair fell in waves to her shoulders. It would be a nice evening out. She didn’t have to be someone she wasn’t. And hopefully tonight, she could make Chandler see that he deserved a bit more.

  “Dial the hormones down,” she advised herself.

  May dropped the towel on the bed and walked slowly to the closet. It would be in the seventies this evening. A warm night. She thumbed through her clothes and frowned. Not a whole lot of social clothes hanging there. Big surprise there. Just when she was about to give up, May slid the last hanger in front of her.

  She had forgotten.

  The cobalt blue satin fell almost to the floor. It had a halter collar that buttoned on the back of her neck with a decent neckline that dipped in the front but didn’t plunge to her belly button. The back, another story. It cut at least two inches below her shoulder blades. Plenty of skin to show but none of her scars.

  May stroked the satin and bit her lip. She had bought the dress when she worked at the accounting firm for the Christmas party. That night never came. Too many lies came to light.

  “It’s a beautiful dress,” she murmured. May opened the closet farther and peered inside. The matching slippers lay on the far right. “You guys were waiting on me, weren’t you?” She nudged them with her left foot and pushed them out of the closet.

  A beautiful dress deserved top-notch lingerie. May walked over to the dresser and opened up the top drawer. She frowned and rifled around. There ought to be a bra and panty set in blue.

  “Ah.” May smiled. “There you are.”

  The lingerie only a shade lighter than her dress. May slid the panties on and then her bra. Make-up first so she didn’t chance spilling some on her dress.

  Her medicine cabinet held woefully few cosmetics. A container of mascara about on its last leg. A bit of concealer and powder. That was the sum of it.

  “Let’s all hope for flattering light,” she muttered and went to work.

  A small improvement. May’s lashes seemed longer and fuller while the concealer and powder evened out her complexion. She looked polished even if she didn’t feel like it.

  May rubbed her thigh absently and walked back into her bedroom. She picked up the dress and slid it over her head. The waist nipped in and fell gently to the floor. May smoothed her hands over the smooth blue material and brought the top up to button it. Two little buttons, and she was practically ready.

  The only thing left, her hair. May walked back into the bathroom and looked at the gentle waves. She shrugged and ran gel gently through her damp hair. A bit of fluff and scrunch. Almost done. May turned to look at the back of her hair and cursed softly.

  Lovely bra she had on. Too bad everyone could see it above her dress. May frowned and bit her lip. She reached back and unhooked the bra and took it off her arms. It dropped into the hamper, and May looked at her back again.

  There was enough support in the dress she didn’t really need the bra. But it felt odd as hell not to be wearing one.

  “Sorry, girls.” May tucked herself firmly into the bodice and looked at the results. No way anyone could tell she had no bra on.

  She leaned around the bathroom door and checked the clock. Chandler would be over in about twenty minutes.

  It had been hard to decide what to do, but May finally chose one of the older music clubs in the historic district. They played a blend of jazz, blues, and soft pop. Chandler would probably fall asleep at the table or wish he had been out clubbing it up with the younger crowd.

  Just another difference between the two of them.

  May put in two sapphire studs and slid her slippers on. Her stomach jumped nervously. Why am I so scared? I trust Chandler. He’s simply confused.

  Ten more minutes. May rubbed her leg and walked slowly out of her room and into the kitchen. Still light outside, and she breathed deeply to steady herself. One little date. That’s it.

  The clock ticked by slowly, and she fought the urge to rip the dress off and put on pajama pants and a tank top. At precisely seven, Chandler tapped on the patio door.

  May fought to simply inhale. Chandler stood there with his hair slicked back and a dark brown suit on. His brown loafers shone with fresh polish. The white shirt under his jacket left unbuttoned a bit and showed the beginning of his golden chest hair. But his eyes mesmerized her. They were deep and dark this evening.

  She brought her hand up and motioned to him. Because if she had to walk right now, she would end up in an unflattering heap on the floor. Her leg didn’t exactly hurt, but it felt weak right now. She could scarcely blame it on her injury. The left leg felt the same way.

  Chandler opened the patio door and stepped inside. He walked slowly over to May and stood before her.

  “So this is the alternative to the jeans you favor.” His husky voice washed over her. Chandler reached up and tugged at a loose curl by
her cheek. “I like it.”

  May smiled and blushed. “I’m glad you approve.” Was that seductive whisper her voice? Oh, Heaven help her.

  Chandler trailed his hand down her cheek to her throat. He ran a fingertip over her pulse.

  Heat flooded her body, and May struggled to control her breathing. “We should be going.”

  He moved his hand reluctantly and nodded. “So where are you taking me?”

  “Club Harmony downtown.” May scooped her keys up from the cabinet and grabbed her blue clutch. “I didn’t know if you had ever been.” She paused. “In fact, I don’t even know if you’ll like the music. But it’s a fantastic club.”

  Chandler put his arm around her waist and took the keys. May set the alarm, and he shut the patio and locked it.

  “Want me to drive?”

  “If you like.” May walked to the passenger side, and Chandler opened the door for her. She ducked inside and buckled up.

  Chandler sat in the driver’s seat and adjusted it. Then he turned the engine over and backed out of the driveway.

  The town glowed softly in the sun’s dying rays. Most of their neighbors sat on porches and rocked quietly to and fro. Several people watered their lawns while children played and laughed in the sprinklers.

  “Harmony is on Broadway.”

  Chandler nodded and turned right. “I think I’ve seen it.”

  The club already fairly busy. A few couples milled around outside while the pink neon sign proclaimed they were at Harmony’s entrance. May noted that most the couples were in their forties although some looked like thirties.

  Chandler parked the car and walked around to her side to help her out. His hand tightened briefly on hers when she stepped out.

  “You okay?”

  He nodded. “Fine.” His brown eyes darkened, and he looked toward the club. “Seems to be pretty busy.”

  May nodded. “It’s been eons since I’ve come here.” She smiled. “But it’s always lively, and the music is fantastic.”

  “That’s all I need.” Chandler put his arm around her waist and guided her up to the sidewalk. He paid the older gentleman at the door, and they walked inside.

  For some reason, it always reminded May of the big dance halls of the thirties. May could imagine a massive orchestra rocking out on the ground level while the surrounding tables enjoyed the tunes. There were three tiers with round tables spaced out evenly. Red candles flickered and gave the dim room a soft glow.

  Some couples chatted at tables while others swayed on the wood dance floor on the first level. Chandler guided her down to the second level and pulled out a chair at one of the empty tables.

  May sank into the plush seat and set her clutch on the table. A waiter appeared instantly.

  “May I take your order?”

  Chandler ordered a bottle of chilled red wine, and May smiled. “You read minds, or did you watch that on cable?”

  He chuckled. “It seemed appropriate.”

  “Wise man.”

  The waiter returned in record time and placed the chilled bucket on the table. “Have a good evening.”

  Chandler thanked him and poured a glass of red for May and himself.

  She took a sip and told herself this was a good-bye date.

  The music slid from upbeat jazz to a slow bluesy number, and Chandler stood. He extended his hand to May. “Care to?”

  She glanced down at the couples swaying on the floor and shook her head. “I’ll fall down.”

  “I’ll catch you.” Chandler motioned to her. “C’mon, May. Dance with a guy.” He paused. “Dance with this guy.”

  May stood slowly and put her hand in his. They navigated down the stairs to the ground level. Chandler stepped onto the dance floor and pulled her into his arms.

  Hadn’t she called him smooth? May slid her arms around his neck and rested her cheek lightly against his jacket. His spicy scent wrapped around her.

  Chandler brushed his lips across her hair. “You take my breath away, May.”

  She stumbled a bit at the words, but Chandler steadied her and chuckled in her ear. “I approve of your choice of dates.”

  It felt entirely too good to have her young neighbor’s arms around her tightly. May inwardly sighed. Had she even thought of what a dance club would mean to the date? She assumed they would sit at one of the tables and struggle for conversation. Fat chance of that.

  The song ended, and Chandler led May back up the stairs. He pulled her chair out and then sat down.

  His brown eyes looked at her sincerely. “I can’t make myself older, May.”

  She took a sip of wine and nodded. “And I can’t make myself younger, Chandler.”

  “Are there any other things you see between us?”

  May shook her head. “We’re simply two different people.”

  “The best couples are.”

  “I had an extremely rough childhood.” May took another sip of wine. “That’s when I had my accident.” She set her glass down and leaned forward. “I will never be able to do things women your age will be able to do.” Now or never. “I can’t have children.”

  Chandler nodded. “Okay.”

  “No.” May shook her head. “It’s not okay.”

  “May,” Chandler began.

  She held up her hand. “Please let me finish. This is hard enough as it is.” May took a deep breath. “I’ve never had a relationship where both people are givers.” The sad, awful truth. “I don’t even know if I’m capable of loving someone like you deserve to be loved.”

  “You’re capable.” Chandler took May’s hand in his. “So you’re older. So what? I like maturity in a woman.” He ran his thumb over her knuckles. “I’m fairly unselfish except when it comes to football in the fall. But we can have two televisions.” He smiled. “I’m all about compromise.” Chandler paused. “As far as all those other women who you say can do things you can’t…bullshit.”

  May blinked.

  “It’s a convenient excuse.” Chandler brought May’s hand up to his mouth and kissed it. “I’ve seen your home and your yard. You absolutely bury women my age. Most are still searching for some sense of purpose or self. You have both.” His brown eyes were sincere. “I wish Amanda was put together half as good as you.”

  He put May’s hand back on the table and leaned back. “I’m starving. How about you?”

  “Sure,” she stammered.

  Chandler motioned to the waiter and ordered two chicken plates.

  May rubbed her thigh absently. “Who exactly are you, Chandler Hughes?”

  “I’m a man lucky enough to buy a house next door to a gorgeous brunette with a stubborn streak and killer horticultural ways.” He shrugged and then sighed. “You’re thinking again. I can see it.”

  Sure she was thinking. Both of her other serious relationships started out like this one. A bite to eat. Sweet words. Promises quickly made and then even more quickly broken. May was scared shitless.

  “I don’t think this is wise.”

  Chandler’s lips twitched. “Do tell.”

  May turned her palms face up. “Listen, Chandler. There’s no use denying that I’m attracted to you.”

  “Glad to hear it.”

  She snorted and rolled her eyes. “But that only goes so far. What’s going to happen when that fades and you grow tired of me?”

  “Grow tired of you?” he repeated and frowned. “Is that the brick I keep beating my head up against?”

  Chandler drummed his fingers on the table. “Is that why you’re having lunch with some polished ass with painfully white teeth and pushing me away?”

  “What?”

  “I saw you at Brennan’s.” Chandler scowled. “I had lunch with my distributor when you two walked in.”

  Oh. Shit.

  May searched for a response. “That’s William Campbell. He was visiting from out of town. The lunch reservation had been his idea.”

  “He’s older than I am.”

  May could
read the animosity in the sentence. “He is a bit older. But that doesn’t really make a difference.” Liar. May winced at the voice in her head. “He wants me to do a project for him.”

  “I bet.”

  Her brown eyes widened. “You don’t even know him. Why are you so mad?”

  “I don’t understand why you keep shutting me down. And I resent the fact Mr. Smooth waltzes right in and makes himself at home.”

  May grinned. “Mr. Smooth, eh?”

  Chandler took a sip of wine. “Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. I’ve already ordered dinner so we can eat and then leave.”

  She nodded slowly. “That may be best.”

  They sat in silence for five minutes before May spoke.

  “How’s Billie?”

  Chandler smiled. “Growing like a weed and giving me gray hairs.”

  May chuckled. “Haven’t seen her in my yard lately. I thought maybe she was slipping.”

  “I reinforced all my doors with latches at the top. It’s like Fort Knox at my house.”

  More silence.

  The waiter arrived with their food, and they ate quietly while the music played softly in the background.

  May drank one more glass of wine, and then they left.

  Chandler jingled the change in his pocket while May rubbed her right thigh. He tucked her into the car and then climbed in. The almost-full moon shone down brightly and illuminated the small town. The first fat raindrop hit the car and startled May.

  By the time the next one hit, Chandler already turned on the wipers.

  The rain fell softly but steadily after that.

  It had been a quiet drive to May’s house, and she searched for the right words to utter. Her chest hurt from all the things she wanted to say but couldn’t. It’s for the best, she repeated over and over in her head. Chandler could move on and have a life with someone else. He would get over this little crush and find someone who would truly make him happy.

  May’s hand moved from her thigh to massage the deep ache in her temple.

  He pulled into her driveway and killed the engine. Chandler turned to study her. “I’ll help you to the patio.”