An Act of Redemption

by K. C. Lynn

  “For accepting the offer and for not being too angry at me.”

  He hugs me close. “I could never be angry at you, Anna.”

  I smile, but before I can respond Jaxson clears his throat. “Come on, let’s get out of the rain.”

  Sarge and I follow as he leads us over to his truck. I stop a little distance away and am just about to say goodbye when Jaxson suggests I stay the night at his place.

  “But my car is here and I have no clothes.”

  “We’ll get you back to your car tomorrow and you can borrow something of Julia’s.” I take a moment to mull it over, running through all the things I have to do for school. “Come on, Anna, it’s late and you’ve had a long day. I want you at my house for tonight.”

  I agree with a nod. The truth is it’s been a while since I’ve stayed there. I like it when I do, it’s my comfort zone, and after this past week I could use this. “All right, let me just lock up.” After grabbing my purse out of my car and locking up I hop in the passenger seat of Jaxson’s truck, since Sarge and Bandit are in the back.

  We pull up to SEAL Extreme a short time later and walk inside the gym. I follow behind Jaxson as he gives Sarge a quick tour, showing him where the locker room is and telling him he can have a shower. He also gives him a change of clean clothes. Sarge is reluctant to take them but knows he can’t stay in the ones he has, especially if he’s going to be working here. So he accepts them with a mumbled thanks and says he will pay him back with his first paycheck.

  “We’ll worry about that later,” Jaxson says, shrugging it off. He shows him the kitchen next and tells him to help himself to whatever he wants then says he will bring stuff for Bandit tomorrow.

  My heart warms at how much he’s going above and beyond for Sarge, but I shouldn’t be surprised. Jaxson might be overbearing and have one hot temper, but there is no denying that his heart has always been bigger.

  After we say goodbye to Sarge we head to Jaxson’s house. On the way over I can’t stop smiling, and before I know it I take my seatbelt off and crawl across the seat to wrap my arms around him and give him a big kiss on the cheek.

  “What’s that for?”

  “For being such a good person,” I tell him honestly. “Thank you for helping him and for always being there when I need you.”

  Clearing his throat he shifts in his seat, uncomfortable at my praise. “You’re welcome, kid. You know I’ll always be there for you.”

  I do know that. He’s been there through the most painful times in my life. Iraq and… Don’t think about him, Anna.

  We arrive at Jaxson’s house in the country a few minutes later and my heart melts like it always does when I see the big tree in their yard with the wooden swing attached to it.

  Julia is waiting for us when we walk in and she immediately wraps me in a hug, even though I’m drenched. “Hey, is everything okay?” she asks worriedly.

  “Yes, everything is good now, thanks to Jaxson.”

  She steps back and smiles up at her husband. “He’s always good at making things better.”

  With a grunt he pulls her over to him and lays a passionate kiss on her. “Anna is staying the night, can you get her something to wear?”

  “Of course.” She turns to me. “Go on to your room and I’ll bring you something. Would you like some tea?”

  “That would be good, thank you.”

  With a nod she heads to the kitchen. I give Jaxson one final hug and thank him again for everything before making my way to the spare bedroom, which is considered my room. It’s next to Annabelle’s and has my name on the door like hers. I smile every time I see it. It makes me feel like a part of the family—my second family.

  That thought has me thinking about my mom and dad. I decide to make sure to call them tomorrow. I always try to twice a week or they worry, especially my dad. If not for being close to Jaxson my father would have never allowed me to go this far for college, even though I’m only a few hours away. He’s always been protective but much more after what happened to me in Thailand… Shaking myself of the thought, I walk into the room and close the door behind me before going and sitting at the window seat that overlooks the front yard. I stare down at the swing that Jaxson made for Julia. The one she had always wanted as a child but never got to have. I have swung on that thing many times, usually with Annabelle on my lap.

  A light knock on the door startles me out of my thoughts and it opens to reveal Julia. “Hey, here is some tea and pajamas,” she whispers, placing my tea on the nightstand and the clothes on my bed. “Why don’t you give me your wet stuff and I can wash them tonight.”

  “Thanks.”

  She closes the door then takes a seat on the bed while I change into a pair of soft pajama pants and a tank top. “Jax told me about Sarge,” she says with a smile. “I’m glad he could help and I’m glad that you asked him to.”

  “Me, too. I was scared Sarge wasn’t going to accept the help, but thankfully, he did. I hope it turns out well for everyone.”

  “I’m sure it will. The guys will take care of him.”

  “You’re right.” I agree with a nod. I crawl on the bed and take a hefty sip of my tea, the hot liquid warming me from the inside out.

  Julia lounges back on the pillows and I follow suit, hugging one of them to my chest. We face one another and I can tell by her expression that she has something on her mind. “Jax just told me about Logan the other day.”

  I let out a deep breath, one that feels like it’s been trapped in my chest since I saw him the other night. “Yeah, it was a big surprise, that’s for sure.”

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  Do I? I hate to even think about him but no matter how hard I try it proves impossible. He’s always on my mind, he always has been and Julia knows it, too. She’s the only one I’ve ever confided in about everything between us because I know she understands.

  “I don’t know, Julia,” I start quietly, realizing I need to talk to someone about it. “I’ve always wondered what it would be like if I saw him again. What would I say? How would I react or feel? And it was nothing like how I thought it would be, but in all fairness it was quite the shock.”

  “I’ll bet it was, and I’m sure it wasn’t easy.”

  “No, it wasn’t, and I’m so conflicted about it. On one hand I’m glad he’s out of there, you know how much I hated him being locked up in that place.” She nods. “But on the other hand I’m still angry. I’m upset that no one told me he was out, even though I understand they couldn’t. I’m mad that every time I’ve seen him he acts like he didn’t just toss me away and rip my heart out.”

  “Wait, what do you mean every time? How many times have you seen him? I thought Jax said it was just the once?”

  “Twice,” I tell her. “Don’t tell Jaxson, but he came to the soup kitchen the other night. He was waiting for me outside after I finished my shift, which is another thing that pisses me off—he seems to know everything about me when I know nothing about him.” I shake my head in frustration. “He was there to give me back something I lost at the club.” I hold up my wrist, showing her the bracelet she knows he bought for me. “Then he tried to walk me home, said it wasn’t safe for me to do alone. The bossy asshole.” She smiles but it vanishes as tears well in my eyes. “We got into a horrible fight or, rather, I screamed at him. I hate how bitter I am. I hate that after all this time he still affects me so strongly.”

  “Oh, Anna.” She moves in closer and drapes an arm over me, providing comfort. “You have every right to feel the way you do. This is a lot to take in and it completely caught you off guard. Logan wasn’t just any boyfriend to you, you loved him deeply and I know he loved you, too.” I shake my head but she doesn’t let me protest. “Believe me, he did, everyone saw it. He handled things very badly, but I know he thought it was the right thing to do. He had no right to take that choice away from you, but I know it’s because he loved you and he wanted to protect you.”

  Her
logic has me bursting into tears as I finally let go, crying out all of my frustration and pain his return has brought on. I have so much pent-up anger, hurt and, most of all, guilt. I feel horrible for yelling at him every time I’ve seen him. I know things must not have been easy for him either. I’m just still so angry about it all, but I know I need to make peace with it. I need to make peace with him.

  Julia stays silent and rubs my back through it all, waiting patiently until I get ahold of myself. “Better?” she asks, after most of my tears subside.

  “Yeah, a little. Thanks.”

  “Trust me, every day will get better. Grams always tells me that sometimes things happen for a reason, even if we don’t understand it. I know everything will work out.”

  “What makes you so sure?”

  She gives me a knowing smile. “Because your trials with Logan is like looking into a mirror, and look at where Jax and I are now.”

  Her words have me stilling, but before I can argue with her she kisses the top of my head and sits up. “Just think about it. I’m going to throw your clothes in the wash. Is there anything else you need?”

  I shake my head. “No, but thank you…for everything.”

  She smiles. “Anytime. Night.”

  “Night,” I reply softly.

  She shuts off the light and closes the door. As I lay in the dark room that’s bathed in moonlight, I contemplate everything she just said. Logan and I were always compared to a younger her and Jaxson, especially Logan. Even I can admit they have similarities, though the way I feel about both of them is completely different. But unlike Jaxson and Julia, Logan and I will never have our happy ending. Too much damage has been done. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever have one. I’ve been on a couple of dates over the last few years but nothing where any of them held my interest or made me feel that spark. I started thinking it was me, and maybe I wasn’t capable of feeling that any more. That was until a week ago when I saw Logan and that spark came back like a fireworks show on the fourth of July.

  The more I think about it the more I realize I need to make peace with what happened—for both of our sakes.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Logan

  “Right, left! Left, right! Right, Right!” I follow Jaxson’s orders, moving side to side and dodging his fists. Sweat pours down my face and my muscles burn fire, screaming at me to give up, but of course I don’t.

  I never give up.

  We’ve been at this for hours already, the guys pushing me to my limits for the upcoming fight. Round nine, the last round before the final and one no one has made it past in over a year.

  “Watch his knee!” Sawyer warns a second too late and I end up getting clipped in the ribs with enough force that almost knocks me on my ass.

  “Break!” Jaxson calls. I go to my corner and grab my water bottle, squirting the cool liquid down my parched throat. “What’s with you today?” he asks, walking over to me. “Your head isn’t in it like it usually is.”

  He’s right, it’s because I have too much shit weighing down on me. Shit that I have no control over and it’s driving me fucking crazy. Of course I don’t admit that though. “I think I’m doin’ all right, your ass hasn’t knocked me down yet.” I taunt with a cocky smirk. I take pride in that because there’s no doubt I’m a good fighter and I can handle my own. But these guys here are trained to kill with their bare hands, which is why I knew I would need them for this.

  Before Jaxson can say anything the new guy, Sarge, speaks up. “I agree. The kid is a damn machine.” He claps me on the back. “Listen, kid, I think we need to talk about your future after this is over. You could really be somethin’ in the professional world and I could be your manager. We would make boatloads of cash. It’s a win-win for all.”

  I grunt but feel a smirk twitch my lips.

  “You’re not helping, Sarge,” Jaxson grumbles. “And what did I tell you about that damn dog,” he says, pointing to the homely-looking canine with his tongue hanging out of its mouth.

  “What about him? I think he adds to our little circle here.”

  “He needs to stay away when customers are around. I told you that.”

  “Why? Look at how many chicks have been fawning all over him. He’s a pussy magnet and a perfect addition to your business.”

  Sawyer and I both chuckle but Jaxson doesn’t find it as amusing as us. “This place isn’t meant to be a pussy magnet,” he snaps before looking over at Sawyer. “See, this is why we should scratch the workout shit and make this place strictly for fighters. It’s starting to become a fucking dating service around here and it’s pissing me off.”

  I have to agree with him there. In the few weeks that I’ve been training I’ve had almost as much pussy offered to me here as I’ve had at the club, which is saying something. And, if I’m being honest, it’s getting harder and harder to ignore. I mean it’s been four years for fuck sakes, but I know what I need to make a priority right now and it isn’t pussy. Unless of course the one in question belongs to… Don’t go there, man, you will never get that privilege again.

  The entire thought pisses me off. Not in the mood for pleasantries any more I jump down and head to the punching bag, needing to hit something. Jaxson senses my change of demeanor and it isn’t long before he comes over and joins me. He holds the bag while I beat the shit out of it. I feel his eyes on me and know what he’s thinking.

  “I don’t want to talk about it,” I say, hoping that will stop him from bringing it up, but of course I know better.

  “You should have told me you ran into her.”

  “Yeah, well if we’re talking about sharing shit then you should have told me what you did for my mom and sister.”

  Silence stretches between us as I continue to punch.

  “So what, you’re pissed off that I helped your mom out?”

  I stop and finally look at him. “No, I’m pissed off that you didn’t fucking tell me. I could have at least been prepared. I wasn’t expecting to go back and see them like that. I expected everything to be the same, if not worse!”

  “And you’re mad that it’s not?” he asks, his tone incredulous. I don’t blame him for being confused; even I don’t understand what the fuck I’m feeling.

  “No, I just…fuck!” I run my hands through my hair, trying to find the right words. “I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m trying to say.” I take a moment to collect my thoughts. “Look, I appreciate what you did, especially for my sister’s sake. But if you want the truth, I don’t fucking like that you saw my life for what it was. I don’t like that I feel indebted to you, and even more so I fucking hate that she changed with your help but not mine.” I lean against the wall with my head down, hating that I just admitted that to him but it’s the truth. I think that’s what pisses me off the most. How many times did I try to get her into rehab only to have her refuse? Sure I couldn’t afford where Jaxson probably sent her but she wouldn’t even consider the idea.

  “Do you really think your home life skewed my perception in some way?” he asks. “You have no fucking clue where I come from. I’m not saying your life was sunshine and rainbows but believe me when I say I come from my own hell. Your mom fucked up and she knows it, but she didn’t change for me, she changed for you. I just helped get her there. As for your debt, you owe me shit. I didn’t just do it for you, I did it for Anna.” My head snaps up at the mention of her, the sound of her name burning like salt to an open wound. Jaxson leans against the wall next to me, matching my stance. “I did whatever she asked for. I did anything and everything I could to help her stop hurting so much. She was fucked up for a long time when you sent her away like that.”

  The image of her that day at the prison flashes through my mind and I grind my teeth against the memory. “Are you saying that I did the wrong thing?”

  He shakes his head. “Not at all. I think you did the right thing. I would have done the same. Actually, I did something similar with Julia and it was hard, but I stand behind m
y decision. Sometimes doing the right thing fucking sucks.”

  He’s got that right.

  “Well whatever your reasons were for helping, thank you. I’m glad to know my sister wasn’t suffering the entire time I was gone.”

  We both don’t miss the fact that I leave my mom out of the equation, but thankfully he lets it go. “You’re welcome. Now about Anna showing up at the fight.”

  I hold my hand up to ward off whatever he’s about to say. “Look, it wasn’t my place to tell you and I figured she would eventually. But I will say that she is not ever stepping foot in that place again.”

  “Damn straight. I told her the same thing.”

  I grunt. “Well hopefully she took it from you better than she did me.”

  He shrugs. “Probably the same, but she did agree that she wouldn’t go back. Apparently it was her first time, all I care about is that it’s her last.” I nod, agreeing with him. “Listen, why don’t you go shower and we’ll call it a day. We can start fresh tomorrow. I want to hit it hard over the next week before the fight. I’ve talked to someone I know in the industry and he’s agreed to come in and help.”

  “Who?”

  “Kolan Slade,” he says the name as if I should know who that is. “Right, I guess you wouldn’t know. He’s Katelyn’s brother, and one of the best MMA fighters in the industry right now.”

  “Why do you feel like we need him?”

  “Because he will be able to offer you pointers that we can’t. We’re trained in combative and him MMA; together we should be able to make you unbeatable. Ricketts postponing shit is making me nervous, and I want to make sure you come out on top.”

  “I can handle him,” I reply confidently, before pushing off the wall and heading to the locker room.

  “Don’t get too cocky, no one is invincible,” he shouts to my retreating back.

  “Except me!” Sawyer bellows from across the gym, clearly eavesdropping.

  Shaking my head I hit the shower, appreciating that the stalls are separate or I wouldn’t fucking have one here. I stand under the hot spray for longer than usual, the heat feeling good on my tight muscles.