by Lynda Aicher
He had to swallow hard to get rid of the lump in his throat before he could respond. “Thank you. That means a lot.” Of all the things that should’ve gotten to him that day, this was the one he’d least expected.
It was a few deep breaths later before he was ready to make his last call. He checked the time and ducked into the office area to ensure Jacqui wasn’t back then returned to his window view. The clouds were gray and heavy, the air cold enough for the snow the weatherman had predicted. Just in time for the holiday season.
“Hey, Grenick. What’s up?” Walters answered, tone upbeat. “How bad did Coach chew you out last night?”
“About as much as you think.” Henrik shook his head, smile returning. “I’m more fucking valuable on the ice. Let Feeney do his job blah, blah, blah.” He shrugged even though Walters couldn’t see it. “Nothing I didn’t expect. I owed it to Rylie though.”
Walters was quiet for a moment. “Yeah. Rylie’s a good kid.”
“He’s not really a kid anymore.” Rylie had matured way past his playboy image this season. Whether that was in part due to Samantha’s influence or simply his own doing really didn’t matter. The results were the same.
“True. So how are you?” Like the other guys, Walters hadn’t bugged him on Sunday night. A brotherly hug and “call when you’re back” was all he’d said before leaving with Rachel.
“Good, now. Really good.”
“Yeah?” The surprised note was clear. “What changed?”
So very much. Henrik chuckled, pinching the bridge of his nose as he tried to process it down to its simplest form. “I fell in love and she loves me back.” He went with the truth, believing Walters would understand.
His laughter boomed through the phone, filled with good-spirited mirth. “That’s really good to hear. I didn’t get a chance to talk to her, but Hauke said it was the piano player, Jacqui. Right?”
“Yeah. That’s her.” Pride filled him again, warm and encompassing.
“Don’t take this wrong, but she didn’t seem like your usual type.”
“Nope,” he agreed. “Not even close.”
“Good for you, Henrik. When do we get to meet her? Are you guys free for dinner one of these nights?”
And here came the favors, the first of many he’d be calling in. “I know you might have plans, but I was hoping you could attend a concert tomorrow night. Jacqui’s performing and…” He inhaled. “I need to show you something. Everyone actually.”
“Okay.” Walters let the word drag out. “Now I’m really curious. What’s going on?”
Henrik gave another explanation about his retirement plans, dipping a bit deeper with the details about his family. Walters knew enough about Henrik’s disdain for his family’s wealth to grasp the importance of his realizations and subsequent peace with it.
“Until last Sunday, you were the only person on the team who knew I could play the guitar. You’re the only one who knows anything real about me. The other guys see the girls I used to date and the hockey stereotype. Even Hauke and Rylie only know little bits based on what I’ve let them see recently.”
“And now?”
“I don’t need to hide anymore.” It really was that simple. His fear of rejection held no power over him now. He finally trusted that his true friends and family—in all their various forms—would be there for him no matter what he did. “Jacqui helped me see that.”
“She sounds like a girl I really need to meet.”
“So tomorrow then?” He gave Walters a brief rundown of the concert time and location, along with his desire to get the whole team there. It was going to happen. He’d make sure of it. “Can I count on you? We can go out for dinner after.”
“We’ll be there.”
Three calls down and a dozen more to make. Henrik checked the time and decided it was still too early to start on the rest. The hard ones were done. Now it was a matter of getting the other pieces into place.
And being there for Jacqui.
His fear hovered beneath the surface, clawing to get free and overwhelm him. He refused to let it out though. Even if she was right and the cancer was back, he couldn’t—wouldn’t—fear for her. He wouldn’t let any of his time be darkened by it now that he finally had exactly what he wanted.
From this point forward, he was determined to live his life, not hide from it. And he was bringing Jacqui with him.
Chapter Thirty
Jacqui checked her phone for the hundredth time that day, only to set it back down. The store had finally quieted down, the last of the Black Friday shoppers dying out. Working and staying busy was the best way to avoid stewing over the pending test results.
Henrik had reluctantly let her leave with a kiss and a long hug. Once again, he’d been more understanding than she’d previously given him credit for. Shame over her lack of trust in him still had her wincing. She’d never doubt him again though.
“What a day,” Max groaned, slumping against the counter. His dark hair flopped over one eye, leaving an exhausted looking one peeking out. “I think I could sleep for a week.”
“Be thankful you’re not the one opening tomorrow.” That’d been her bargaining chip to get this morning off for her tests. “And don’t forget we have practice at noon.” The school’s holiday concert was tomorrow night, and they were both performing in it.
“No rest for the wicked, right?”
“Okay, Max,” their boss said as he trudged up an aisle. “You can head out now.”
A small whoop, and Max took off for the back where the employee lockers were. Jacqui chuckled and dug out the duster to do some cleaning. It was doubtful she’d be hearing from her oncologist this late at night. Was the delay good or bad? Did the lab get backed up, or were the tests still inconclusive meaning even more tests? Would he call tomorrow even though it was Saturday? He’d never made her wait before.
She rubbed her hand over the sore spot on her stomach, the burning pain light right now but still there.
“Are you okay, Jacqui?”
She jerked up at her boss’s question, smile moving into place. “Fine. Just tired.”
He glanced around the store, checked the time. “Why don’t you go too? It’s been a crazy day, but things are pretty much done now.”
“Are you sure?” She was already edging toward the back, duster restashed beneath the counter.
He laughed, waving her off. “Go. I’ll see you tomorrow at seven.”
“Thank you!” She was in the back, grabbing her coat and purse before he could change his mind. Max was already gone, having left as quickly as she intended to.
The cold air smacked her cheeks when she stepped outside, light snowflakes falling to dust the ground in a layer of white. She’d already texted her mother that she wouldn’t be home tonight, her smiley face reply an unobtrusive show of approval.
Damn, she loved her family. Even when they were overbearing and intrusive, they supported and loved her. She hadn’t met Henrik’s family yet, but he’d shared enough to know his wasn’t the same. Well, he was a part of hers now, and they’d make sure he never doubted it.
Henrik was waiting at the door when she stepped out of her car. His big frame filled the doorway, the porch light casting a soft glow over him. She stalled for a moment, heart easing, and wondered again how she’d almost walked away from him.
From his love and everything he gave her.
Peace. Family. Another place to call home.
“Hey,” he said, coming out to take her bag from her. His palm was warm when he cupped her face, his lips soft on hers. “You look beat.”
She managed a tired smile. “I am.” Sleep had been limited the entire week. Between stressing over Henrik and the cancer, she’d been lucky to get three or four hours each night.
He tucked her into his side and walked her into the house. He took care of her coat as she leaned against the wall to slip her shoes off. She wasn’t sure she’d want to get back up if she sat on the little bench.
The lights were dimmed, soft music filtering into the room from the hidden speakers. A fire danced in the fireplace, the flames warming the room.
“Are you hungry?” he asked, wrapping her in his arms.
She fell against his chest, eyes closing as her muscles slackened. His rich scent encircled her and she purred at the familiarity. This was home, right here.
“I’m just tired,” she mumbled, eyelids heavy.
“Then let’s get you to bed.”
Bed. Sounded good. She let him guide her to his bedroom, his bed already turned down. “It’s still early,” she protested weakly. It was barely nine o’clock. She never went to sleep that early.
“And you can’t keep your eyes open,” he countered, placing a kiss on her temple. “Get undressed, I’ll go close up and be right back.”
“You don’t have to,” she half-heartedly protested.
He looked back, smile soft and loving. “I know.”
Her legs buckled, dropping her onto the edge of the bed when he left the room, the exhaustion winning. Having Henrik to end the incredibly long day with was the only thing keeping her tears at bay.
Tears of stress, worry, fear, anger—they were all digging at her chest and shoving up her throat in a bid to break free. The thought of curling up next to him, his warmth and security surrounding her, held them back.
She was tucked beneath the covers, teeth brushed and sleep encroaching, when he came back. The music was off, the lights dark in the outer room.
So handsome. He’d shaven at some point today, his navy sweater hugging his form and darkening his eyes.
The next thing she knew he was spooning into her back. She hummed her appreciation, snuggled closer and clasped his hand when his arm came around her.
“Thank you,” she mumbled, still amazed at how lucky she was to have him. That he was still here with her despite the baggage she brought.
He nuzzled into her neck, kissed below her ear, inhaling. “I’ve got you.”
Her heart flowed over, her love and gratitude overtaking the last of her will to be strong. To protect him from her pain and fears. The tears slipped out, silent and heavy. They fell off the edge of her nose and dampened the pillow, but she clamped her mouth tight, holding in the sound that built in her chest.
“Shhh,” he soothed, urging her to turn in his arms. She went willingly, burying her face in his warm chest.
“I don’t want to cry,” she insisted, tears still falling in silent betrayal.
“Sometimes you need to.”
Her breath hitched on her inhale, her resistance easing. She let the tears fall then, a gentle wash of everything she’d been holding in for months. Years. It all flowed out in a cleansing dose of past regrets. Of lost dreams and found hope. It was cathartic where her outburst with Aiden had been angry.
She could do that with Henrik, too, break a little and know that he’d still have her. Like her family, he’d be strong for her when she was too tired to be. He let her too. Held her and stayed quiet while she purged more of the demons she’d kept trapped for years.
“I don’t want to die,” she whispered, voice hoarse.
“I don’t want you to either.” He hugged her tighter, a kiss landing on her head.
His honesty tugged an out of place chuckle from her. “I’m glad to hear that.”
He urged her chin up, wiped the last of her tears from her face with gentle fingers. His kiss was just as tender, every touch a statement of his love for her. This—he—was exactly what she wanted. Someone who understood her, accepted all of her and still wanted her.
His tongue swept over her lips, softly prodding and lazy. Tiny brushes, loving pecks that woke up her libido and urged her forward. She opened to him, shifted to get closer.
He rolled her to her back, settled between her legs and encircled her with his love. Every deep kiss, soft breath, little nip a statement of what they were to each other.
“I love you.” The soft words were breathed into her ear, sending off a rush of goose bumps down her neck.
She dug her fingers into his hair, kissing him again and again. Did he understand what he meant to her? Did he know how special his love was?
His kiss heated with the passion that’d burned between them since the first time. More forceful, he plundered her mouth, hips moving in an impatient rhythm that matched the desire bursting within her.
He had a condom slipped on moments later. A dark shape in the gray light, his features were indistinct. She had them memorized though. Didn’t need to see to know exactly what he looked like.
He filled her, his girth stretching her inner walls in a glorious stroke of sensation. This close, it was impossible to miss the intensity and love that stared down at her.
“I love you.” She injected all her feelings into the words while tracing that perfect bow of his lip. “I’ll never let you go again.” Never.
His kiss was soft and deep, hips rocking to the comforting flow of their love. This was the connection she’d avoided, the one she’d run from. The one that’d been too strong to stay away from.
The passion built, a gentle swell that overtook her heart and shoved another round of tears up her dry throat. She clutched him close, his breath warming her neck, his soft grunts teasing her ear.
“You’re so perfect for me.” He kissed across her shoulder, hips working faster, each stroke another declaration of how far they’d come. Of where they were still heading.
“You too,” she managed to answer around a gasp. She was awash in sensation, in the love that spilled over to make her stronger. She’d always feared it would weaken her when it’d done the exact opposite.
Her toes tingled, her orgasm building in a slow crest that warmed instead of overwhelmed. It was just as intimate, just as amazing as any of the wild sex they’d shared. This was confirmation and renewal. A grasp at tomorrow she’d been afraid to claim.
His thrusts increased until her climax rolled through her in gentle waves that peaked in a sharp hitch and pulse of muscles. Henrik shoved hard a few more times and she rode the crest with him, clung to him and gave back.
She embraced the euphoria until her muscles stopped shaking and he stilled. Relaxing into the mattress, he followed her down, breaths gusting over her skin where he nuzzled her shoulder.
Thank you. The silent gratitude went up to whatever entity had sent Henrik into her life. This was one gift she’d never again doubt.
Chapter Thirty-One
“We’re not going to discuss this further,” Allen Benning insisted. “It’s still early in the season, and a lot can happen between now and June.” The GM sat back in his chair and glared at Henrik across the conference table.
“I won’t change my mind,” Henrik told him, unwavering. The meeting had gone about like he’d expected. The Glaciers were resistant but not completely angry. “I thought it was right to let you know what I was planning.” That was what family did.
“You’re going to leave a big hole in our defense,” Coach O said from his spot next to Benning, one hand methodically rubbing his goatee.
“I can be replaced. There are plenty of guys ready to do so.”
“You’ve still got years left in your legs,” he countered. “There’s nothing in your medical about injuries either.”
“This is about me doing what I need to do.” He glanced at Vanessa who sat at his side, soaking in her support. “I’m not walking tomorrow. I’m not leaving the team in a lurch.” He took a long breath, let it settle. “We are all more than one thing, and it’s time for me to embrace that.”
“Damn it, Roller,” Benning snapped. “What kind of a game are you playing?”
“A straight-up one.” He could’ve stayed quiet and simply walked at the end of the season. “Like I said. I’m giving you the heads up so you can look at numbers and other players.”
He took a deep breath and went on. “There’s a holiday concert this evening at the McNeil Stone College of Music. If you can come
to that, I believe you’ll understand my motivations.” He eased a slip of paper with the concert information across the table then stood. He was done trying to convince them he was serious. “I hope you can make it tonight. Thank you both for the meeting.”
He turned and left after that, at peace with what he’d done.
“We could’ve waited for months before doing this,” Patrick muttered once the three of them were in the elevator.
“Yes,” Henrik agreed. “But they know now and it’s not a secret. It’s in their hands how they want to deal with it.” He tucked his wool dress coat around him when they stepped outside. The snow was still falling in a light cascade that was pretty more than worrisome. He shook Patrick’s hand. “Thank you for coming. I hope you can make it tonight.”
Patrick glanced at his watch. “My flight leaves at five.”
“I’ll record it for you,” Vanessa said, ever efficient. “Go home to your wife.”
Patrick sighed. “You know, for a guy who’s given me little trouble, you’re certainly making up for it now.”
“That wasn’t my intention.”
“I know.” Patrick shook Vanessa’s hand. “I’ll take that video offer. And you—” he pointed at Henrik, his blond hair now dusted with snow, “—stay out of trouble. I’ll be in touch.”
“Thanks, Patrick.” He watched his agent stride away, thoughts already clicking ahead to the next task on his list.
“You have everything set for tonight?” Vanessa asked.
“I believe so.” He’d spent most of yesterday after Jacqui had left for work getting things in place and practicing. Stumbling tonight wasn’t an option.
“We’ll see you there.” She stretched up to place a kiss on his cheek before heading to her car. How she managed not to slip in her high-heeled boots, he’d never know.
He checked his phone. Still no word from Jacqui. She’d been anxious that morning even though she hadn’t voiced her concern. Waiting for the test results was grinding on her. He hadn’t asked her about it though. She’d tell him when she knew, and until then he had his fingers crossed and was staying positive.
