The Truth About Faking

by Leigh Talbert Moore

  “You sure you don’t want to go out with us?” Jason says to me. “We’re meeting up with a gang at the Shadow Freeze.”

  I can feel the tension in the car rise as Shelly holds her breath waiting for my answer.

  “No. I’m going home,” I say, and I hear my best friend exhale.

  “You guys looked great out there,” Jason says. Our eyes meet in the rearview mirror, but I look out the window again. I can only deal with one problem at a time.

  “You’ll have to come when I’m cheering,” Shelly says.

  “Yeah. That’s like next Friday, isn’t it?” I try to back her up.

  “Yep,” she says.

  “Okay,” Jason sounds vague.

  Thankfully when we get to my house, everything looks normal. I go inside and Mom’s still up. Dad’s in their bedroom.

  “Did we win?” she asks when I walk inside.

  “Yeah,” I say. I look at her sitting on the couch with a book like it’s been the most normal evening.

  “You did a great job tonight,” she smiles at me.

  “I guess.” I drop onto the sofa. “I’m not really the best cheerleader.”

  She grins and pinches my cheek. “Well, you’re definitely the cutest.”

  “Stop,” I push her hand back. She laughs, but I’m not in the mood.

  “So you and Ricky seemed to have a nice time chatting,” I say, watching her face.

  “Oh.” She looks back at her book. “He just had some questions about one of my clients,” she says.

  “Ms. Jackson?”

  Her eyes meet mine, and she smiles. “It was just something unexpected came up and he wanted my advice.”

  I’ve got the feeling it was more than that, but I don’t know what else to ask. We’re quiet as she read another page. Then she closes the book and sits up.

  “You have a date with Trent tomorrow?” she asks.

  “Yep,” I say.

  She nods and for a moment I get that feeling again, like there’s more she wants to say. But she doesn’t. “Well, I’m tired. I think I’ll go to bed now that you’re in.”

  She kisses me on the head, and I watch her leave. And that’s it, end of discussion. I take a deep breath and lie back on the couch, grabbing the remote. I flip through the channels a while, not watching anything, then I just leave it on a classic movie station. I stare at the obviously fake monsters and eventually fall asleep.

  A strange tapping sound makes me jump awake. The movie’s now some horror classic where people are bursting out of pods and eerie noises are playing as background music. I figure that’s what caused me to wake up, but then I hear it again. Something’s tapping on the window! My heart’s racing as I grab a couch pillow. No good. I drop it and pick up Mom’s book instead. At least it’s a hardcover.

  I creep over and reach with shaking hands to move the curtain back. Oh, god. I breathe. It’s just Jason. I walk over and open the front door so I can step outside.

  “Hey, you’re still up,” he smiles. “And still in uniform.”

  I look down. “Oh. I fell asleep on the couch.”

  “Let’s go for a walk,” he says.

  I glance around and consider it. I’m wide awake now, and it’s a warm night. “Where’s Shelly?”

  “I took her home.”

  “So why didn’t you take yourself home?”

  “Not tired,” he says, reaching for my hand. “C’mon. Let’s go down to the creek.”

  “That’s at least a mile from here!” I slide my hand back. “I don’t want to walk that far in the dark.”

  “So get in the car,” he says, and I see the Passat parked at the street.

  I sigh. It can’t be much past twelve. “Okay. But not for long. Mom and Dad might wake up.”

  Jason drives us to his end of the neighborhood, where there are more empty lots than houses and the houses that are there are gigantic. Stephanie’s family moved to Shadow Creek last fall. Right around the time she announced she was going to college in California. I look out the window and wonder what it must be like to be her.

  Jason parks by one of the undeveloped lots, and we get out and walk down to the water. “It’s nice here,” he says. “Without all the construction.”

  “Yeah,” I say, and I notice he’s carrying something like a small box.

  We stop under a big live oak tree that’s branching out over the water. It’s a nice creek, even if it is man-made and intentionally installed so they could name the high school after it. A faint scent of cut grass is in the air, and it feels like spring.

  “What’s that?” I ask.

  He looks down and reads the box. “Wine coolers. Grabbed ’em out of the mini-fridge at home. Want one?”

  I shake my head. “I don’t drink. And besides, my dad would flip out if he smelled alcohol on me.”

  “Live a little, H.D.” Jason grins. “Own your name.”

  “I own my name just fine, thanks.”

  He flops down on the soft grass and twists the top off a bottle. I sit beside him and listen to the water trickling downstream. It’s a peaceful sound, and being here makes me feel relaxed and calm.

  “So how’d it go with Shelly?” I ask.

  “Eh.” He takes a long drink and then frowns.

  I watch him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Shelly’s nice, but…”

  “But?” I lean forward, trying to catch his eye.

  “I don’t know.” He looks away.

  “Maybe it would help if you hit her with your car.”

  He laughs and twists the top off another bottle.

  “Number two so fast?”

  “This one’s for you.” He hands me the cool, foil-covered glass.

  “I told you—”

  “I know. Just try it. Help you loosen up.”

  I slant my eyes at him. “I hope you’re not thinking what I think you’re thinking.”

  He laughs softly. “I won’t even try to guess what that means.”

  I take the bottle from him, studying the fruit on the label. I have to confess, I am a little curious, and it’s not like I’ll have more than just a taste.

  “It’s okay, you don’t have to.” He reaches to take it back, but I pull away. I glance at him and take a tiny sip. My eyebrows raise.

  “It’s sweet.”

  “Yeah, it’s basically crap.”

  “No, I mean, it’s not what I expected. It’s more like… punch.” I try another, slightly longer taste.

  Jason catches my arm. “Like spiked punch. Take your time.”

  “So what’d you want me for?” I ask.

  He looks at me quickly. “What?”

  “I mean… why’d you come to my house.”

  “Oh.” He seems to relax. “I don’t know.” He looks down at the grass in front of him. “I miss talking to you.”

  “Yeah.” I think about it a second. “Me too.”

  “And at the game… it seemed like you were upset. About your mom and—”

  “I don’t want to talk about that.” The image of what happened at the game ruins the calm I’m feeling, and right now I just want peace.

  “Okay.” Jason nods, and we’re quiet for a little while. I take another little sip and wonder what my big deal was with wine coolers anyway. They’re not so bad. I’m starting to feel sleepy again when he suddenly jumps up.

  “I know!” he says.

  “What?” I jump, too, at his sudden movement.

  “Truth or dare.” The distant streetlight makes his eyes twinkle. Or maybe I imagined it.

  I frown. “The game?”

  “Yeah, let’s play.”

  “Just you and me? Now? Uh uh. No way.”

  “What?” He drops onto the grass beside me again. “Why not?”

  “I am not playing Truth or Dare with you… out here. Tonight. Drinking wine.”

  “That’s the best way!” He smiles, poking my arm. “What’s the matter? Chicken?”

  You bet I am. “No,
” I lie. “It’s just… that’s just something stupid waiting to happen.”

  “Stupider than fake dating?”

  “Yes,” I nod. “Much.”

  “I’ll go first.” He positions himself right in front of me and stares at me for a few seconds. I stare back.

  “What?” I finally ask.

  “I’m first.”

  “I didn’t agree—”

  “Come on. Just one round.”

  I shake my head and sigh. “Truth or dare?”

  “Dare.”

  “Really?” Heck. I look around. “You know, I wasn’t expecting to play this game.”

  “Wuss.”

  “No, I’m just… thinking.” I keep looking around. I don’t usually play Truth or Dare. Partly because I can never come up with good dares, but mostly because I’m petrified of what the truth questions might be. Always something embarrassing or dirty. Or both.

  “Time’s a’wastin, H.D.”

  “OK. Um… I dare you… I dare you to…”

  “The suspense is killing me.”

  “I dare you to go bang on the window of that house as hard as you can and then run back.”

  “What?” Jason frowns.

  “Yeah.” I push his arm. “That big one over there. I’m sure those guys have a house alarm. See if you can set it off.”

  “That is so lame.”

  “Well, I didn’t want to play your stupid game anyway.” I take another sip and turn away.

  “Hang on,” he breathes getting up.

  Jason takes off running into the night. Sure enough, a few seconds later the entire oversized house across the street lights up like a parade with buzzers and sirens. I start giggling as I see Jason streaking back to where I’m hiding on the creek bank. He jumps down beside me.

  “OK,” he’s breathing hard. “That wasn’t so bad.”

  “Thank you!” I say triumphantly, rolling onto my back. There are a million stars out tonight, and for some reason, I keep wanting to giggle. We wait a few minutes for the house to return to normal. The owner walks out in a robe and looks around, then he says something about cats or kids and stomps back inside. I snort and Jason rolls onto his back beside me, looking up at the sky.

  “Now it’s your turn,” he says.

  I feel my throat go dry and sit up. “I didn’t really want to play—”

  “Too late!” He cuts me off, sitting up too. “I already did your dare. Pick one, H.D.”

  My stomach is tight, and I can feel my pulse picking up. Should I say truth or dare? No telling what Jason’ll ask me. No telling what he’ll try to make me do. And now I’m clear on the other side of the neighborhood. That’s a long walk home in the dark.

  “Come on,” Jason demands. “Truth or dare?”

  “You know, this really is the stupidest game.”

  “Pick one.”

  I grab the bottle and finish the entire thing in one gulp.

  “This should be good,” he laughs.

  “Truth.” I say. “No, dare!” Then I hesitate again. “No, truth.”

  “Listen,” Jason leans over. “I know you’re a little sheltered, but you can only pick one.”

  “I know.” Ugh! “Truth.”

  “OK.” Jason waits, looking at me. “You sure?”

  “Just ask already.”

  “You have to tell the truth.”

  “I know.” My heart’s racing.

  “Hmm…” he looks around.

  “Get on with it.”

  “Patience, grasshopper. I gave you time to think.”

  “Well, you wanted to play this silly game. I figured you had it all planned out.”

  “Okay, I’ll give you an easy one. Since you’re inexperienced and all.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Truth. Were you at least a little sad when we fake broke up?”

  I stare at him. This isn’t the question I expected. It’s quiet, and I can hear the trickle of the water flowing downstream in the creek. I think of that afternoon. The pain in my stomach, my urge to clutch my pillow and cry when we hung up the phone. I’m certainly not giving him that bit of information. Still…

  “Okay,” I nod. “Yes.”

  Jason laughs. “I knew it.”

  “So? It was fun. I mean… we had a good time together.”

  “Mm hm.”

  “Weren’t you sad?”

  “It’s not my question.” He grins.

  “It is now. Truth or dare?”

  “So we’re going again?”

  “Sure. Which is it?”

  “Dare.”

  “Jason!”

  He laughs. “What? You think I don’t know how to play this game?”

  “OK. Dare.”

  I look around again. What now? We’re practically in the middle of nowhere. And I don’t want to say anything too outrageous or personal because then it’ll be my turn again…

  “Go ring the doorbell five times on that house over there,” I point at a different house slightly farther down the street than the previous one.

  “Five times?” He frowns. “That’s just mean, H.D. They could have little kids.”

  “Doubtful. I don’t know anybody with little kids who can afford to live out here.”

  “That’s very stereotypical.”

  “That’s the dare.”

  He grumbles something and gets up. I watch him dash off into the night. The house is on the corner, so I lose sight of him briefly. My turn’ll be next, and I’m not sure what I’ll choose. Just then I see lights come on in the house and a slim, dark figure dash across the street and behind the neighboring houses. Moments later Jason’s dropping onto his back beside me again, breathing hard.

  “Shew,” he pants, staring up at the night sky. “Too much running.”

  “You have to be in shape to keep up with me,” I grin, leaning toward him. A piece of my hair slides into his face. He catches it and twirls it around his finger.

  “Next house better be closer,” he smiles giving it a little tug. “Truth or dare?”

  I slide my hair back and straighten up again. “Um… Dare.”

  “Ha ha! Now you’ve fallen into my clutches,” he evil-laughs, jumping up beside me.

  “Jason. Nothing ridiculous.”

  “Uh huh,” he nods. “Skinny dip in the creek.”

  I roll my eyes. “How did I know it would be something like that?”

  “That’s the dare,” he smiles.

  “No.” I shake my head.

  “You can’t say no.”

  “I just did.”

  “So you’re reneging?”

  “I’m not getting naked in front of you.”

  “That’s a nice image,” he smiles, leaning back again. “You realize that gives me the next two turns?”

  “I don’t care.”

  “You don’t have to undress here,” he says as if I could be persuaded. “You could do it over there.”

  “No,” I say.

  “It’s dark.” He’s still smiling at me. For some reason I think of his lips touching my neck and my stomach tightens.

  “No,” I say softly.

  He seems encouraged. “Why not?”

  I shake my head to focus. “Did you really just ask me why not?”

  “I’m just wondering what your actual reasons are.” He speaks like we’re on the debate team. “I mean, I can guess what they might be, but I want to be sure you’ve thought this through.”

  “First, there’s my stated reason,” I say, matching his tone. “Second, because what’s to stop you from running off with my clothes once I’m out there?”

  “I’d never do that to you, H.D.” He acts offended at the suggestion.

  “Of course you wouldn’t. Sorry. No.”

  “OK,” he grins. “Truth or dare?”

  I pause. Then I reach for another bottle and twist the top off. “Truth.”

  He watches me, still grinning. “Hmm… what would I like to know.”

  “This agai
n,” I mutter, taking a sip.

  He looks around then brightens. “Who was your first?”

  I cough and send wine through my nose. “Ugh!” I squeal grabbing his sleeve to wipe it.

  “Now that’s attractive,” Jason laughs. “Nice. Do they teach you that at cheer camp?”

  “Did you just ask me what I think you did?”

  “Who was your first?” He repeats as if it’s the most casual question in the world.

  I sniff a few times and wipe my nose with the back of my hand. He’s still looking at me, waiting. I sit back and push my hair behind my shoulder, trying to be cool. I look off at the creek.

  “What makes you think there’s been a first?”

  Jason raises his eyebrows. “That answers two questions.”

  “So? My dad’s a reverend. I’m saving myself.”

  “That’s nice. I like it. I get another turn.”

  “Dare.” I say immediately.

  “OK.” He thinks for a moment. Then he sits up again. “I dare you to say this.”

  I watch his finger trace letters on the grass. F, U…

  “Seriously?” I say, catching his hand.

  He laughs and laces our fingers. “What?”

  I pull my hand out of his. “Are you just trying to be a jerk to me? That’s not who I am, and you know it.”

  “It’s just a game, Harley.”

  “But why do you want to play it with me? Why can’t you just accept my choices and respect me for them?”

  “I do respect you. But what if you’re still deciding how you feel about your choices? And what if you decide to make different ones?” He looks down. “I’d kind of like to be there for that.”

  All those feelings for him are sneaking back, and I can’t remember how I fought them off before. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I say. “This is who I am. And if you don’t like it—”

  “I’m talking about, like with the wine coolers.”

  “I was just curious. I should’ve known you’d take that and run or whatever.” Everything I want to say seems fuzzy. “That’s just the kind of thing that makes it impossible for me to—”

  I bite my lip. I was just about to say “to go out with you,” but since when do I worry about going out with Jason? I’m going out with Trent!

  “For you to what?”

  “Nothing. Just nevermind.” I move to my knees. It’s got to be time to go home. “It’s getting late, and I’m not staying up all night for this.”