Mustard Seed

by Laila Ibrahim

  “We paid sixteen dollars for them two,” Jesse said. “I can’t just take a loss like that.”

  Matthew scratched his head. “My wife’s brother is the justice of the peace in Richmond; he sent me here,” Matthew lied. He pulled the wad of money out of his pocket and counted it out. “Here’s eight for Samuel, and eight more for William, plus twenty for your trouble.”

  Matthew stared at the man while slowly waving the US Treasury bills between his pointer finger and thumb. It was more than this man’s monthly wages. The man scrunched his eyes and rubbed his cheek. A slow smile spread over his face, and he reached for the money.

  “You shoulda led with that,” the man said. “It’s all about business, right. Take ’em. What do I care? I’ll just ride the other niggers harder. The young one got roughed up a bit. He ain’t used to hard work, but we showed him his place.”

  Samuel was injured! Lisbeth’s insides felt hollowed out. Had they really secured his release? She slowly walked back to the wagon, working to appear calmer than she felt. At the wagon, she paused by the front.

  Without being obvious she whispered to Emmanuel, “He says we can take them back with us!”

  Emmanuel let out a long sigh. He bowed his head, and his lips moved in a silent prayer. Empathy crashed through Lisbeth. This experience felt unbearable to her; she could only imagine how overwhelmed and helpless Emmanuel must feel, having to sit in this wagon and watch while two White men negotiated money for his son’s release. She burned with shame and rage.

  Climbing onto the wagon seat, Lisbeth watched Matthew move into the rows of tobacco plants. It struck her that he had never met William. What if he walked up to the wrong man? She couldn’t see them in the midst of the tall plants. She telegraphed a silent message to her husband: Samuel knows William. Samuel knows William. Go to him first. She forced herself to sit calmly, gazing out over the scene.

  She saw Matthew’s hat in the area where Samuel was harvesting. She let out her breath. Samuel would be able to find William. Lisbeth couldn’t read Samuel’s face from this distance, but after a brief reunion, the two of them walked toward the end of the field where William was picking.

  William startled at their approach. He was hesitating. This was taking too long. She glanced at Jesse, the overseer. He was still chatting with Mitch, oblivious to the undercurrent. The other overseer was not. He’d turned his horse in their direction and was staring at the three men.

  Lisbeth telegraphed another silent message: They’re safe people, William. You’ll be safe if you come with us. I promise. Please come.

  The other overseer leaned forward to signal his horse to move. William noticed, looked at Samuel, and nodded. They walked back toward the wagon. William and Samuel were limping, their heads bowed down. They didn’t look at either overseer or the other entrapped men as they trudged away. As they drew close to the wagon, Lisbeth caught a glance of Samuel’s face. She gasped at the sight.

  One of his eyes was swollen shut; a hot red line crossed the lid. Tiny slices marked the skin on his hands, some still bleeding. Lisbeth felt physically ill. She squeezed her hand hard and resisted the urge to react or look directly at him or William.

  Matthew had stopped to chat with Mitch and the overseer. Lisbeth stared at them. She saw her husband throw back his head, laughing. A large grin on his face, Matthew shook hands with Jesse and waved to the other man on the horse in the fields. When he turned away from the overseers, his face fell flat and his eyes were hard.

  As he climbed next to Lisbeth in the wagon, he quietly said, “May God forgive me for laughing at such sin.”

  Mitch, sitting to Lisbeth’s right, said, “Brother, I pray God will forgive us for more than that; otherwise, heaven will be empty of White men.”

  A powerful, painful spirit hung in the air between the two men. Lisbeth studied Mitch. A touch of the madness and sorrow Mary’s brother lived with was in her brother-in-law’s eyes too. She searched her husband’s face. If she was honest with herself, it was there as well. On the surface, he was calm and resolute, but underneath so much more was buried. Matthew nodded in shared understanding of his brother’s words.

  Lisbeth and Matthew usually pretended that the battlefield hadn’t changed him, but in this moment she knew that was a lie. Throughout the United States, so many families believed the conflict was behind them, but it wasn’t. In homes, cities, and states the war raged on—inside of those who had fought it. For all of them the certain line between good and evil had permanently blurred. They’d battled and lost, no matter the specific outcome of each skirmish. There was no winning when success meant you had destroyed another American—someone’s son, husband, or father.

  Matthew got the wagon moving. Lisbeth returned her attention to the fields, her heart full of emotion. She watched the tall plants jerk back and forth as the leased laborers cut tobacco leaves. Brown hands wiped sweat off brows between slices. One young man looked up and stared at her. He was hardly older than Sammy. The intensity in his dark-brown eyes pierced her soul. He mouthed, “Pray for me.” Pain shot through Lisbeth like a physical arrow. She bit her lip hard to keep from yelling out.

  She’d believed this was over, that slavery had been ended, but now she knew another truth. That boy’s desperate brown eyes would startle her awake in the night. She was abandoning him, all of these boys and men, to this unjust fate. They’d succeeded in their mission to rescue Samuel and William, but that meant nothing to the ones they were leaving behind. She’d have to live with that for the rest of her life.

  A tear running down her cheek, she closed her eyes and prayed, “God, please show mercy for these men and reunite them with their loved ones.” It was a small act that felt completely inadequate for the horror of this situation. “And please forgive me for not doing more.”

  She squeezed her eyes tight and took a long, jerky breath to calm herself. She shook her head to clear it of any unpleasant thoughts, because this was no time for severe emotion. When she opened her eyes a rider was coming from the direction of the big house. Her pulse quickened, and she wiped her cheek dry.

  “That’s Edward!” she whispered to Matthew. “I am certain of it.”

  Her belief was confirmed when the rider came closer. Even though Edward’s dark hair was mostly gray and he had gained considerable weight, Lisbeth immediately recognized his angry eyes.

  “I hear someone is interfering with my plantation,” Edward shouted as he pulled up next to Mitch, his chestnut-brown horse stomping in place. Peering around her brother-in-law, Edward startled when he saw Lisbeth framed between the two men.

  His hard, cold eyes bore into Lisbeth. “You!”

  Terror filled Lisbeth’s body. Her heart pounded, and her mouth went dry. She slid her arm through Matthew’s and pressed closer to him.

  Lisbeth’s mind flashed to the last time she’d seen this awful person, a man she’d believed she felt true affection for. But in truth she had only felt enamored with the idea of him. He had been furious when she came to White Pines to return his gifts and inform him that she had married Matthew. At the time, she’d feared he would hurt her, but she escaped without any lasting scars. Ending her engagement to him had been the most difficult, and best, decision of her life.

  “We made a business deal with your overseer,” Matthew said. “We don’t mean you any harm.”

  Edward laughed. “Well, now we both know you are simply lying—because you have done nothing but harm me!”

  Lisbeth pleaded, “Please, Edward, leave us be.”

  Edward’s gaze narrowed at her. “Leave you be. Once again you come to my home, disturb my peace, and demand that I leave you be!” he scoffed. Madness showed in his eyes. “You do not belong here. What would possibly make you return?”

  She had the urge to shout, Something you don’t understand at all: love and compassion. Instead she calmly replied, “Family. We made a promise to our family. And we are keeping it.”

  Edward continued glaring at her. Lisbeth
poked Matthew’s pocket. He looked at her, and she nodded. He reached in to pull out the thick stack of money. That got Edward’s attention.

  Matthew counted out five bills. Lisbeth’s heart raced to be giving away so much of Mattie’s hard-earned savings. But the hungry look in Edward’s eye told her that money was still all that mattered to him. Matthew passed the bills to Mitch.

  “This should more than make up for your trouble, Edward,” Mitch said as he held out the money. “Let’s just make this business. Nothing personal.”

  Edward looked at the money, at Mitch, and then back at the bills. He glanced at Lisbeth, hatred in his eyes.

  “You are not worth the trouble,” Edward said. He grabbed the money and yelled, looking at all of them, “None of you are worth anything to me!”

  Lisbeth turned her head toward Matthew and whispered, “Please, just move on.”

  Her husband flicked the reins, and the wagon lurched forward, startling Edward’s nervous horse sideways. Lisbeth gazed ahead, feigning calm and ignoring the hatred of the man she’d nearly married. To steady her pulse she slowly took deep breaths in, and then she said a silent prayer of gratitude that this plantation was not her home.

  CHAPTER 22

  JORDAN

  Charles City County, Virginia

  Mama’s scream woke Jordan. Heart hammering and the blood rushing from her limbs, Jordan scrambled to sit up. Pain shot from her arm through her whole body, forcing her to freeze despite her urgency. She rolled to her side and pushed up, being careful to protect her injured arm. She looked around, disoriented and confused. Mama was sprinting away from the wagon. Samuel stood ten feet away.

  Jordan sighed with relief. They were back at the Johnsons’; Mama had screamed in delight.

  Her mama reached Samuel and kissed him like he were a little boy. Ella scampered over Jordan to get a better look at the scene on that side of the wagon. Jordan’s heart lurched as her emotions spun from terror to joy. Samuel was back, Ella was her cousin, and Sarah had left Fair Oaks. The pain of her arm was a small price to pay for the joy of this day.

  Samuel accepted Mama’s attention until she hugged him too enthusiastically. Mama pulled back. Jordan got a good look at his beaten face and gasped, her emotional compass spinning again.

  “Oh, my baby! What did those monsters do to you?” Distress filled the older woman’s voice.

  “Mama, don’t you think about it,” Samuel reassured her weakly. “I’m back now. Let’s just forget what happened.”

  Mama’s face got hard. “I ain’t never gonna forget . . . about any of it.”

  Taking Samuel’s hands in her own, Mama studied them, turning them over to look at both sides. She gently touched the cuts with the tip of her finger. She looked up at her son’s face, cupped his cheek gingerly, and shuddered.

  Tears in her eyes, Mama said, “I shouldn’ have asked you to come with me.” Her voice cracked. “These hands ain’t s’pose to look like this again.”

  The joy Jordan had been filled with moments before slipped away. She clenched her jaw in outrage for Samuel. Fury and sorrow caused tears to well up. It was so unjust. She felt like hitting something.

  Jordan had never seen her mother look so defeated. Her heart twisted for her mama’s pain and her own inability to protect either her mother or her brother.

  Mama said, “Sorry ain’t enough, but that’s all I got.”

  Samuel just gazed at Mama, blinking, then bowed his head. Jordan held her breath, longing to hear Samuel reassure their mother that he was fine, but he only stared at the ground. After a long delay he shook his head like he was shaking off a memory.

  Samuel looked up and gazed at the scene. He saw the wagon and slowly asked, “You got Cousin Sarah?”

  “Uh-huh.” Mama nodded.

  “And?” Samuel asked.

  “Ella her girl.”

  A wistful look on his face, Samuel smiled and nodded. “Today is a good day, Mama. No amount of hate can take that from us. We did God’s work, coming here.”

  “Thank you, Son,” Mama said, looking relieved. Samuel wrapped his arms around Mama, offering a gesture of reconciliation, but Jordan noticed he did not give her any reassurance that he was fine.

  Cousin Sarah walked up to them, and Mama reintroduced Sarah to Samuel. Jordan was startled to remember that they hadn’t yet met on this trip. It had been nineteen years since Samuel and Sarah had seen one another. Sarah and Ella felt like family to her now; it was hard to believe she didn’t care about them a few weeks ago.

  The battered screen door flew open. Pops walked out of the house carrying a pitcher, followed by Lisbeth holding a stack of cups. He stopped suddenly when he saw Mama talking to Samuel. He tipped his head back, eyes closed, and his lips moved as if he were praising God. Jordan was moved by the intensity of his emotion. He sure did love Mama.

  Lisbeth, having left the cups on the little table on the porch, walked to Pops and wordlessly took the container from his hands. She patted his arm, and they shared a small smile. Pops walked down the stairs and wrapped his arms around Samuel and Mama. Lisbeth hung back on the porch, watching Mama’s reunion with Pops, while Jordan watched her family from the wagon. Ella had joined them too. She stood close, watching the adults speak to one another.

  Mama pointed to the wagon, and Pops made eye contact with Jordan. It was suddenly too much. All her held-back emotion burst through. Tears welled up in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. As Pops walked over to her she took a shaky breath.

  “Baby girl, we all okay. No need to cry, now,” Pops soothed. He climbed up next to her in the wagon and hugged her gently while she let the tears flow.

  She pulled back from the embrace and looked at her father. “Is . . . is Samuel all right?” Jordan asked.

  “He gonna be jus’ fine,” Pops said. “I hear you saved your Mama.”

  Jordan shrugged with a shy smile.

  Pops kissed her cheek. “This broke your arm?” Pops held up the top half of the walking stick. Jordan nodded.

  “I’ve never seen Mama so fierce,” Jordan said. “She slammed it down so hard it split right in two.”

  “Mattie a strong one when it’s called for,” her father confirmed with a nod.

  Pops’s calloused fingers rubbed the small metal eagle. Mama, Samuel, Sarah, and Ella came to the side of the wagon. Pops passed the stick to her brother.

  “Look what yo’ mama done in one whack,” Pops said.

  “Wow, Mama,” Samuel said in admiration. “This is a thick stick.”

  “Big sticks need to be broke!” Mama said.

  “Whatcha gonna do with it?” Pops asked.

  Mama looked at Sarah, a question in her eyes. Their cousin shook her head with a shiver and replied, “I don’ know what to do with such evil.”

  Sarah touched the beak of the eagle that had killed her mother for protecting Ella and Sophia from a cruel and hateful act. Jordan’s heart welled up again. The joy and the pain were nearly too much to hold at once. Way deep in her soul she felt the gift of having her family reunited, but too many people didn’t share that blessing.

  Sarah looked around the circle. She swallowed hard. “Thank all you all for findin’ my Ella. And comin’ for me . . .” Her voice broke.

  Jordan’s mind flashed to a missing little girl. How could Cousin Sarah ever be fully at peace when Sophia was alone in the world with no one to care for her? Jordan looked from face to face, waiting for someone else to say the words of reassurance that filled her head. When none were offered, she screwed up her courage and said, “Cousin Sarah, we aren’t going to forget about Sophia. We’ll keep writing, searching, and asking until we find her too.”

  Or find out her fate, Jordan thought, but did not say out loud. Cousin Sarah smiled tenderly at her and took Ella’s hand.

  She said, “We gonna have a new life to welcome her to when we do find her.”

  Mama said, “Ella, you gonna love Oberlin. You gonna get to go to school, and our Jordan gonna be
one of your teachers!”

  Jordan’s heart skipped a beat. It was time to be honest with herself . . . and her family.

  Gently she said, “Mama, I’m not going back to Oberlin with you.” Jordan blinked back the tears that were once again pushing against her eyeballs.

  Mama sucked in her breath. “After all this?” She shook her head, looking hurt. “You still gonna go to New York?”

  Jordan’s throat was tight. “No, Mama,” Jordan said. “I have to stay in Richmond . . . to teach at the freedmen’s school. God’s calling me to help the children from the orphanage get a hand up. I’m going to be a sower, right here.”

  Mama’s shoulders dropped, and a tight, sad smile crossed her face. “It ain’t so safe, you know?”

  “You didn’t teach me to be safe,” Jordan replied. “You taught me to be brave.” Jordan looked over, scared to see her father’s reaction.

  Pops said, “Anythin’ I can say to change yo’ mind?”

  Jordan shook her head, tears seeping out the sides of her eyes.

  “You are just like Mama,” Samuel confirmed. “Once you set your mind to something, you make it happen.”

  Everyone laughed.

  “I’ll write letters every week,” Jordan said. “I promise.”

  “That gonna be real nice,” Mama replied. Then she whispered fiercely, “You leave at the first sign of trouble! You hear me?”

  “Yes, Mama. I will.” Jordan laughed through her tears.

  “An’ you tell any suitors that this ain’t really home,” Mama said, teasing, but not.

  Jordan nodded. “Don’t worry, Mama. When it’s time for me to have babies, I know where I belong . . . with you at my side.”

  CHAPTER 23

  LISBETH

  Charles City County, Virginia

  Lisbeth’s heart nearly burst with pride and joy when Mattie marched up to her on the porch. The older woman pulled her into a long, tight embrace. Mattie pulled back and looked intently into Lisbeth’s eyes.