by Wood, Lauren
“Do you want to hold her?”
I was immediately backing away. I wanted to see our daughter and look at her in awe, but actually holding her was a different thing altogether. I’d never really held too many babies and I was sure that I would drop our daughter.
“I don’t think I’m ready.”
“Well you better get ready Scott. You have a daughter and I know she’d like to meet you.”
The pressure was on and I finally moved a little closer. I sat next to her on the couch and tried to calm down. It was certainly easier said than done. I don’t know why, but of all the images in my mind, this wasn’t one of them. It should have been, but it wasn’t.
She put the baby into my arms and helped me to get it right. I looked over at Blair, her perfume faint and the smell of her shampoo invading my nostrils. “You really do look good Blair.”
“No, I don’t. I’m a mess, but thank you for looking past it.”
She was always so humble, and it wasn’t just a game. Blair never had known how precious and beautiful she was to me.
“What about Renee?”
“She takes after her mother.”
“Well are really full of yourself today Scott. I know that I look different then when you saw me last. Babies are no joke and I am sure I am a hot mess.”
“You’re still the sexiest woman that I’ve ever seen before.”
Blair waved me off like I was being stupid, but it didn’t matter. I saw the grin on her face. No matter how much she wanted to ignore the words that I said, I knew that she wasn’t going to be able to. I could feel the chemistry springing back to life between us and I wanted nothing more than to fan the flames.
“So, when does she go to sleep?”
She shoved me gently.
“Do you think of anything else Scott?”
“Honestly, no.”
“Well, you’re going to have to wait a little while longer. Renee will be up a bit before she goes back to sleep. It’s going to take some patience.”
I just shook my head in amazement. She really had no idea how long I’d been waiting. I’d been waiting my whole life for Blair. A few more hours wasn’t going to kill me. It might feel like it right now, but I knew that it would be easier this time.
I watched Blair leave the room to put our daughter to bed and I stayed on the couch, waiting for her return.
“You want a drink?”
She shut the door behind her, and I nodded my head yes, thankfully. I really needed a drink and something else to get my mind off of the fact that I was rock hard and raring to go. As soon as I knew that we could, all I could think about was being inside of her again.
“Are you trying to take advantage of me, Blair?”
“Not yet, though you have to be unwilling for that to happen. You always were a bit of a slut Scott.”
“Really?” Wow, she was back to her teasing self and I didn’t want to break the spell.
“Only for you Blair.”
“Me and every other girl in the city that caught your eye. Don’t forget I’ve known you for a long time.”
“Well, I haven’t been that way for a long time. Been celibate since Valentine’s Day.”
I hadn’t meant to say that out loud, but it had spilled out on its own accord, so obviously the information wanted to come out.
“Wow, that’s a long time.”
“I know.”
“That would be a year in a few weeks.”
I clenched my teeth together at the reminder. It was painfully clear at the moment and she didn’t have to bring any more attention to that fact. I didn’t want her to anyways.
“I know.”
“You know what would be special?”
“What?”
I didn’t like where this was going. What would be special is if she would start getting naked, so I could have my way with her. It was all I wanted at the moment and I was waiting for her to deliver.
“Why don’t we wait until next week and we can make love again, on the same day, a year later?”
“Aww, that’s romantic.”
“I know. I think it would be sweet.”
“No, Blair.”
It was her turn to look shocked and I loved the look on her face. She never did have much of a way to stop her expressions.
“Why?”
“Because I’m going to slide into you very soon. Not next week. Now.”
She shivered noticeably and that little shake did more than anything else did. She was still standing up and before she sat down on the other side of the couch, I pulled her onto my lap.
Blair made a gasping sound when I dragged my hard length against her core. She whimpered as I pushed her down onto me and I growled at her when she tried to get away.
“Where are you going?”
“Scott…”
Her legs straddled my waist and her core was settled against mine. Blair ground down onto me and closed her eyes with a look of pleasure.
“You can’t keep playing me like this Blair. Look at where you are right now. What you’re doing. Are you really going to tell me that this isn’t what you want?”
I grabbed her hips and pulled her down hard on me. I wanted her to see what was waiting for her, had been for quite some time. All she had to do was admit what this was. I didn’t want to hear about it like it was something that just happened accidently. If she wanted this, she was going to have to finally make the decision out loud.
“Yes, this is what I want. It’s just… Aren’t we moving too fast?”
“I’m not inside of you, so it isn’t fast enough for me. Why did you have to wear pants today?”
“Because nothing fits.”
“You haven’t changed a bit, but I don’t want to do this here. We need a bed to do it proper.”
Her face was red from my words and I still found it amazing that she was able to blush like a school girl, like we hadn’t done this all before. Like I hadn’t seen every inch of her body.
“It’s too bright in there. Come on Scott. This is fine.”
She wasn’t getting it and I finally just picked her up. When she made a sound, I shushed her and reminded her that we had a baby sleeping. If Renee woke up, I was doomed.
“Scott, wait…”
I wasn’t going to wait anymore. I thought I’d made it clear that there would be no more waiting.
“No.”
I threw her on the bed, and she bounced once before stopping herself. She was out of breath and her eyes were alight as I started to take off my clothes. No more waiting.
“You get yours off Blair, or I won’t be responsible for ripping anything.”
Her face was ashen, and I could see where her eyes were.
“I haven’t done this since… I don’t know if I am ready for this.”
She was looking at me, as if she had never seen it before. I was trying to rush the situation, only to realize that Blair really wasn’t ready. It was in her eyes that this was all too much. I wanted her to think about what she was doing, but I think she was.
I needed to slow down before I scared her away. I took a deep breath and walked towards her, as unmenacingly as possible, but I have to admit that it was almost impossible.
“We can take things slow.”
“It doesn’t look like slow is on your mind, Scott.”
It wasn’t, but she didn’t need to know how badly I wanted to slam her down and fuck her until she couldn’t walk for a week. Usually I would say something like that out loud, but I didn’t think that she would appreciate my honesty at the moment, not that anyways.
“It’s not Blair. But I see that it’s going to have to be.”
Blair
He undressed me with care and there was still a quick desire in Scott’s eyes, but his motions were slower. I didn’t realize how badly I needed that, until I was able to calm down. I hadn’t been able to in a very long time in his presence and I was finally able to look Scott in the eyes.
I was afrai
d of what I was going to find there, but he was just as worried as I was. I could see it on his face.
“What’s the matter Scott?”
“I don’t want to forget this moment.”
“Well don’t leave this time.”
“I know. I shouldn’t have left before. If I would have, would it have been different?”
He asked the question, at the same time he was covering my body with his own. His lips went to my neck, bypassing my lips and then going downward. How was I supposed to be able to think of an answer, when his hands were on me in such a way? It was impossible and I had to think that he was just messing with me. That’s what this was. It’s what it had to be.
“Are you not listening?”
“I am, but you’re distracting me with your mouth Scott.”
He was down to my stomach and the flesh was raised up with goosebumps. I was shaking inside, and Scott lifted up again to ask me a question.
“Do you want me to stop?”
All of his inquiries were getting frustrating. This was not the time for that. It was time for him to give me what I needed.
“Shut up and stop asking me things. I need you Scott and now you’re going way too slow.”
He chuckled at me and then spread me open. I could feel the burst of cool air that fanned the flames of my desire and made me wiggle. “I remember how much you liked to run, so just know that you’re not going to get far Blair.”
My eyes closed with the first touch of his mouth and I was in heaven. It felt so good. He felt so good and I wasn’t able to hold it in any longer. Before I knew what I was doing, my thighs were quaking, and I was calling out his name.
“How long has it been since you’ve been touched? I think that’s a record Blair. Even for you.”
His words were not helping, and I tried to block him out. My insides were turned to jelly one moment, and then the next, it was all building up like before and I couldn’t stop the sounds of need spewing out of me. I was begging him for more and then begging for less when another wave of need crashed over me.
“Please Scott. I want you in me!”
“I thought you wanted me to take my time?”
He had this grin on his face and he might as well have been gloating. I tried my best to not let it get to me, but I had been warmed up enough.
“You were the one that couldn’t wait.”
Scott grinned. “You’re right. I don’t want to wait any longer.”
He was kissing me the next moment, his lower half sliding him inside of me, just like I’d asked. I always asked for things that I wasn’t ready for though and this was one of them times. I couldn’t stop the overwhelming feeling that took over.
I held on as he rutted inside of me. This was more like before, and I knew then that I may never see the softer side of Scott again. I don’t know if I wanted to, if I was honest with myself. Now he was passionate and needy, and I liked the idea of him not being as in control as he had been before.
There was no way I was going to be able to think. He was pushing deep, and I was unable to stop the sounds of pleasure. I encouraged him to go faster, and harder. I couldn’t get enough of him and the bliss repeated itself every few minutes.
He went on forever and I was a puddle of nerves by the time he was through. I could feel him shoot deep, but I could only grip him with my inner walls. My arms had long since fell down beside me.
Scott pulled out and we both made a gasping sound. I was trying to catch my breath when he kissed me.
“You don’t know how good you feel.”
“Does it feel different?”
He shook his head like he was trying to figure out if he’d heard, what he thought he heard.
“Different?”
“You know, because of the baby. Everything is different now. Was it as good as before?”
He pulled me in closer and told me that I was being silly. I didn’t feel like I was. Everything was different since the baby and I was afraid that he wouldn’t feel the same way about me as he had before. I wanted to believe that he’d felt what I’d felt, but that didn’t mean that it was true.
I covered myself up, my mind running a mile a minute. He acted like I was being stupid for asking such a thing, but the answer was more important to me than I would have liked to have admitted. I didn’t want to tell him how badly I wanted to know what he felt. I was waiting now.
“You’re serious?”
“Yes, I am serious and you’re killing me. I’m getting up.”
I started to and he pulled me back on him and drew me in against him. His face went to the crook of my neck and he asked me what would make me think that I was any different.
“Because I can see that I’m not the same Scott. I just wanted to know if I feel the same. I can’t really tell like you can.”
“Nothing has changed. You’re still as beautiful as you were when I met you all those years ago.”
I scoffed because I knew he was lying, but I was thankful for the lie. I knew that things had changed, lots of them, but it was good to know that he didn’t see the flaws the way I did.
“So, what do we do now Scott?”
“What we should have done all that time ago. We will be together and raise Renee.”
I just closed my eyes and listened to his heart beat behind me. It was hard and strong, much like the man it was inside of. A tear rolled down my cheek, sliding against his arm. I hoped that it didn’t become noticeable, but he still found out.
“What’s wrong Blair?”
“I have been so worried about everything. Then I found out that she was yours, I didn’t know how you would respond.”
“We’ve known each other long enough that you should know that I was going to do the right thing.”
“I know, it’s just, I don’t know. It’s one thing to be there for Renee, but it’s another thing to be there for me.”
“You’re the one I’ve always loved. Where else would I be?”
He had an answer for everything and for the first time in a long time, I wasn’t afraid of the future. It was a relief that I couldn’t even put into words. I had been so afraid how this was all going to work out, but I’d never imagined that a few hours after seeing him, I would be laying in his arms and everything would be better.
“Aren’t you mad at me Scott?”
“For what?”
I had many reasons that popped into my head, but I didn’t want to give him any ideas or reasons to be mad at me.
“Just for everything. Choosing Dominic.”
“I didn’t make it easy to choose me.”
He hadn’t, and I was glad that he saw that now, however I would have been mad if I were him. How could he be so blasé about it?
“Well I choose you now Scott. I should have chosen you, all of that time before. I don’t know what I was thinking. I thought I could run away from it, from you, but I should have known better.”
He pulled me closer and I felt all of his hard parts pressed against me.
“You are never going to get free again Blair. You’re mine now and I am not letting you go anywhere.”
I wanted to ask him if he was talking about right now or in the future. His grip on me was tight and I tried my best not to whimper out loud when he pushed inside from behind. I wasn’t prepared for that, for him, but I was going to have to learn how. All over again.
Scott
“Why are you so nervous Scott?”
“If you don’t get why, I should really have rethought who I was going to confide in about this.”
Lisa waved me off with a hand gesture. “Who else are you going to get, that knows you two better? I’ve been in this little game with you two all along. I deserve to be the one giving you the pep talk.”
“Well then talk, because I’m starting to question this. Am I doing the right thing?”
“If you’re going to ask her to marry you, then yes, this is the way to go about it.”
“What about the fact that she w
as almost proposed to on this day already?”
“It didn’t work out. You two deserve to be together, so ask her.”
“What will she say?”
I hated this feeling inside of me. I wasn’t used to feeling unsure. Confidence had gotten me through a lot of things, and I needed it to again. I needed to walk in there tonight and do something I said I would never do. I’d almost asked her before, but then things had gotten complicated.
“I think she will say yes. I give you a better chance than Dominic.”
I was cursing under my breath, wondering what I was doing, getting advice from Lisa.
“Well, I got to go.”
I needed some time to get my head on right and she wasn’t helping, at all.
She said goodbye and wished me luck. I was going to need luck today, to finally put a ring on the love that I felt for her. To proclaim to the world that I wanted to be with Blair, and only Blair, for the rest of my life. At one point, it had seemed like a lifetime, but now it didn’t feel like enough time at all.
I got to the restaurant and immediately wished that we would have just did something at the house. It would have been easier, less stressful, but I wanted it to be special. This was the one and only time that I was going to do this, and it had to be perfect.
“Is your guest on their way?”
I looked up at the waitress and nodded. I told her that Blair was on her way and ordered us a couple of glasses of wine. After a few more moments of waiting, I started to get a sick feeling. I called her and waited for her not to answer.
“Where are you?”
“I’m outside.”
“What are you doing out there? Are you just running late?”
I was already calming down with the idea that it wasn’t what I thought.
“No, I um, I don’t know. Valentine’s Day is kind of a weird day for us.”
“Are you afraid of what’s going to happen?”
There was silence and I knew that this wasn’t going to end well. She was freaking out at the whiff of it getting serious, but she was just going to have to get over that right now. We had a kid after all. It wasn’t getting more serious than that.
