A Headstrong Woman

by Maness, Michelle

  “What happened, Alexandria?” Jonathon asked; he dreaded the answer but knew she needed to talk about it before she could work through it herself. Alexandria turned her head to study him a moment before moving to sit beside him, her shoulder touching his. Jonathon had about given up on her sharing when she slowly began to recount the events of her evening. She was shaking again by the time she had finished. Jonathon took a moment to absorb it.

  “You’re fortunate it wasn’t worse,” he said gently.

  “I know,” she admitted. “Had you not shown up when you did, it would have been.”

  “Sorry I wasn’t here sooner.”

  “You have nothing to apologize for, I’m the one who turned down your offer of an escort home,” she reminded him.

  “Yeah, but it wouldn’t have been the first time I ignored your protest,” he teased her. To his surprise she laughed, only to a moment later, dissolve into tears.

  “I’m so scared and I feel so dirty…”

  “Alexandria, that’s natural I think but you have no reason to feel dirty. Are you afraid he’ll come back?” he asked her.

  “I guess or just scared that someone, anyone, might try it again,” she admitted.

  “They’ll find it a lot harder; I’ll be watching you and this place awfully close now.”

  “Jonathon, I appreciate everything that you’ve done and do, but maybe you should move on, it seems I’m a bad luck charm. Maybe Anna’s right; maybe I should move back home.”

  “Alexandria, I can’t believe you just said that. First of all I’m not going anywhere and neither are you. You mean to tell me that you’re going to let some drunken cowboy do what rustlers and robbers couldn’t?” he asked her.

  “This was different, Jonathon, he put his hands on me and…”

  “That’s more frightening and harder to ignore. I can’t say that I know how you feel but I can certainly understand it. Let me ask you this, Alexandria. Would moving back to your parents mean that no one could ever hurt you again?”

  “No,” she said irritably.

  “So why would you?”

  “I’m tired of fighting to hold it all together,” she said miserably as fresh tears threatened.

  “You’re tired and you need rest.”

  “It’s more than that.”

  “You’re a coward?” he asked and watched her chin snap up.

  “How can you even say that?” her eyes filled with hurt.

  Jonathon smiled, “There’s that stubborn tilt, you’ll be okay,” he reached out and brushed his knuckles across her jaw.

  Alexandria shuddered, “Jonathon…”

  “Don’t?” he tone was mildly amused.

  “You have the most annoying habit of taking the words right out of my mouth,” she told him.

  “I’ll work on that,” he assured her as he traced the curve of her ear.

  “I shouldn’t be here alone with you,” she said absent-mindedly. “And I shouldn’t feel so safe with you,” the words were uttered on almost a whisper.

  Jonathon felt his heart flip. As much as he respected her, he decided it was time for her to return to her room. “Good night, Alexandria. You need to get some rest,” he forced his hands to his sides.

  Alexandria looked momentarily hurt. “You’re right,” she finally agreed as she stood. “Goodnight,” she hurried from the room.

  “Goodnight,” he called after her. Good morning would have been more accurate, but he didn’t correct her.

  Jonathon stared at the fire. He felt overly warm but he suspected the fire wasn’t to blame. He was going to have to remember to keep his hands to himself where Alexandria was concerned. He didn’t want to put either of them in a position that they’d later regret.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Alexandria dressed for work with leaden limbs. Between the events of the night before and loss of sleep, she wanted nothing more than to climb back into bed. After leaving Jonathon, she had tossed and turned for hours, her mind troubled by the changes in their relationship. He shouldn’t be touching her and kissing her as he had and she shouldn’t be allowing it, enjoying it even. She had been blissfully unaware that she could feel such things and wanted that back. She sighed as she shoved her hat on her head and moved out of her room to dress Lilly. She arrived in the kitchen to find Millie bustling about as usual and a subdued Anna standing at the stove. Her sister appeared to have been crying and looked as exhausted as Alexandria felt.

  “Has Jonathon gotten up yet?” she asked as she started setting the table. Anna’s shoulders rose and fell in a quick shrug.

  Alexandria frowned.

  “If he has I haven’t see him,” Millie answered.

  Alexandria turned and went to the parlor to wake her foreman. She smiled at the sight that greeted her. He was sprawled on the too small settee, one arm over his head, the other across his chest, and one foot on the floor. He sported the beginnings of a beard and her fingers itched to rub it; she resisted. She had always loved rubbing her dad’s unshaved cheeks in the morning, however that action would be entirely too familiar with a man who wasn’t her relation.

  “Jonathon,” she shook him gently.

  She hated to wake him.

  Jonathon moaned; his eyes opened slowly. When he opened his eyes to find Alexandria leaning over him he was struck with the urge to pull her close and hold her; he knew better.

  “Good morning,” he said sleepily.

  “Breakfast is almost ready,” she stepped back to allow him room to get up.

  “I’ll have to go make myself presentable,” he told her as he struggled with his boots.

  “You’re fine, just come eat,” she told him.

  Jonathon rubbed at his stubbled jaw and frowned. “I’m not presentable…”

  “Jonathon, Millie is a widow, I’m a widow; Anna has a father and brother, what is so shocking about some whiskers? You’re worse than a woman about your appearance,” she accused.

  “You look tired,” he noted.

  “And you look wide awake,” she smiled.

  “I like bantering with you, Alexandria,” he informed her; then added thoughtfully, “maybe too much.”

  “What?” Alexandria frowned.

  “Nothing,” he said as he stood.

  Alexandria let the comment go.

  After breakfast, Jonathon shaved and changed before he and Alexandria joined the men on the range. Each of the men looked over her bruised face and fought against anger. Nick had been the only one among them that would even consider hitting a lady. Sparky had a few bruises himself Alexandria noted as he approached her.

  “Alex, I’m sorry none of us was here to help you when you needed it. I just wanted to tell you that none of the rest of us would ever offer to harm you,” he assured her.

  Alexandria smiled at him. “I know that, Sparky. Nick has made me uncomfortable for some time. How old are you?”

  “Twenty-two.”

  “How old were you when you came?” she asked with a frown. She could remember him showing up in town years earlier.

  “I was fifteen, just turned. I had run away from an abusive stepfather. I stayed until my Mom died and my older sister married, then I struck out. Elijah took me in, showed me the ropes… I have a lot that I owed Elijah,” he said quietly.

  “Do you find my being here and my attending yesterday’s festivities inappropriate? You respecting Elijah as you do.”

  “No, Alex. I don’t begrudge you any happiness you can find. I wish you the best,” he said sincerely.

  Alexandria smiled at him. “Thank you, Sparky. Is that a nickname?”

  “Yeah, Elijah gave me that nickname, said all it took was a spark to set off my temper, then started calling me Sparky,” he admitted with a boyish grin. “I manage my anger better now than I used to though. At least most the time,” he added as he rubbed his bruised jaw. “I swore when my Mama died that I’d never stand by and let another man hit a woman….” his voice trailed off; his face was anguished.
<
br />   “What’s your real name?”

  “Wesley, Wesley Smith.”

  “It’s nice to meet you, Wesley,” she extended her hand.

  Sparky studied her a moment, smiled, and took her hand.

  ***

  Alexandria rode silently beside Jonathon; her thoughts occupied, and body sagging. Jonathon had bullied her into coming back to the house for lunch and an afternoon of rest. She had been about to fall asleep in the saddle.

  Jonathon watched Alexandria and wondered what she was thinking; she looked troubled. At the house, Jonathon reached for her and lifted her down. He felt her tense; her gaze pinned on something or someone over his shoulder, and turned to see what had disturbed her. Lane, staring at her in disbelief, stood at the bottom of the porch steps.

  “What happened to your face?” his scathing gaze slid over her.

  “One of my men attacked me; he’s moved on now.”

  “Moved on? Are you crazy? Look at you; this is no way for a lady to dress! I told you that you’re ruining your reputation, do you not care?”

  “Not particularly,” she shrugged.

  Jonathon silently applauded her.

  “I have a ranch to run, Lane; I’ll do whatever is necessary to do that.”

  “Do you know what people in town are saying?”

  “I thought we already covered this, I don’t care what people think. I’m going to raise my daughter and run this ranch to the best of my ability. It’s the only option open to me.”

  She had said the wrong thing.

  “The only option open to you?” Lane exploded. “I want to marry you, instead you insist on ruining your good name!”

  “She has done nothing to ruin her good name; it’s busy bodies and gossips who are hurting her reputation,” Jonathon stepped in.

  “You stay out of this! You’re almost as much to blame after yesterday!” Lane shook his finger in Jonathon’s face.

  Alexandria wasn’t sure that was wisdom after what she had seen him do to Nick.

  “This is between me and Alexandria,” Lane emphasized the use of her first name.

  “When you start yelling at Alexandria, I make it my business,” Jonathon’s tone was cool and even.

  Alexandria took in the hard glint of his eyes and stepped in. “Lane, I appreciate your concern but it’s unnecessary.”

  “Is he just your foreman, Alexandria?” Lane demanded.

  “No, I told you he’s my friend and I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t talk down to him.”

  “Friend? Don’t be foolish, Alexandria, men and women are never just friends,” he spat at her.

  “Lane, I think you’ve said enough, in the future if you decide to come and yell at me, please refrain. Good day,” she said and turned to enter the barn; her hands were shaking.

  Jonathon followed her and allowed silence to reign for a few minutes.

  “You’re pretty intimidating when you’re mad,” he teased to break the tension.

  Alexandria sighed, “I didn’t want to fight with him but he was making me angry. Making comments about me and treating you like… like…”

  “A common cow hand? I am, Alexandria.”

  “No, you’re not! Besides that, what makes him any better than a common cow hand? Certainly not his manners!” she said in indignation.

  “I agree,” he told her. “But he’s part of the upper class. I’ve seen it my whole life. To your class I am a cow hand and before that a farmer.”

  “My class?”

  “Alexandria, sweetheart, you own the largest ranch for miles around, you’re not in my class,” he informed her and watched her frown deepen. She was so unpretentious. It was no wonder the ladies of her own class looked for reasons to scorn her, she had never deemed their social clubs worthy of her time.

  “It may be the biggest, but right now it’s not the most profitable,” she sighed.

  “It will be again in no time, Alexandria.”

  “I hope you’re right. Want to join us for lunch?” she offered.

  “I thought you’d never ask,” he smiled.

  ***

  Alexandria watched Anna closely as she filled her plate. Anna was keeping her eyes on her plate, and wouldn’t join the conversation. As soon as the meal had ended, Anna busied herself. Alexandria decided she would confront her sister as soon as they were alone. Before she could follow through, however, a knock sounded on the front door. Millie answered it and returned a moment later with a deep frown.

  “Mr. Moody is here to see you, Alexandria,” she informed her boss. Alexandria frowned and hurried to her room to change. She traded her work clothes for a deep burgundy day dress and asked Millie to see Mr. Moody into her office. She stood as he entered. His eyes skittered over her bruised face but he made no comment.

  “Mrs. Morris, you look lovely today,” he reached for her hand to press a kiss to the back of it.

  Alexandria repressed a shudder.

  “Mr. Moody, won’t you be seated?” she invited as she reclaimed her own seat.

  Simon frowned but sat as asked. “I was hoping to speak somewhere less formal,” he admitted.

  “I apologize; I assumed you were here on business.”

  “That really depends on your answer to an important question,” he was watching her speculatively.

  “Then I suppose I should hear your question first,” she suggested. Simon nodded, “Mrs. Morris, I have come to care for you deeply and have admired you even longer. Will you honor me by becoming my wife? I must warn you that I am quite insistent that we make it so,” Simon informed her and watched her frown.

  Alexandria wanted to know how he could have come to care for her deeply when they barely knew one another. Her married to Simon Moody? She could not and would not marry the man!

  “Mr. Moody, I am flattered, however, I must decline. I really have no desire to remarry,” she said as politely as she could.

  “Then you leave me no choice, Alexandria. I am afraid that I will be forced to foreclose on your loan if you don’t marry me or pay the balance in full,” he informed her and laid a sheaf of papers on her desk.

  “This isn’t legal,” her voice was shaking with anger.

  “Oh but it is, there is a clause in all my contracts stating that an unmarried woman may not hold the lien on land,” he informed her as he stood. “It’s frowned upon for a lady to own property, I doubt any judge would contradict me. Think about it, Alexandria,” he breeched good manners by using her given name without her permission.

  “Get out of my home!” she shot around the desk and held open her office door. “You think I could possibly love you after you pulled this?” she was barely keeping her anger in check.

  “Who said anything about love?” Simon asked her. “I want you to warm my bed at night and decorate my arm by day, you have four weeks to make a decision, Alexandria; good day,” Simon replaced his hat and calmly walked through the front door.

  Alexandria returned to her office and collapsed into her chair. What was she going to do? Maybe she should ask Jonathon for advice. Alexandria immediately discarded the idea. She depended on him too much as it was. This she had to do alone.

  ***

  Jonathon watched Simon Moody leave; Jonathon was filled with a sense of foreboding. He had never liked the man and the satisfied look on his face did little to relieve Jonathon’s concerns. He turned from the bunkhouse window and sat down to write a message to his brother; he had sent a letter a few weeks earlier and had yet to hear back. He was now anxious for some report or word so he could begin making plans. He had decided that if he ever returned to South Dakota it would be for a visit only. Montana was now his home and he had asked his brother to sell his farm. He wasn’t certain why he felt it was an urgent manner.

  ***

  Looking for a loophole, Alexandria read the papers in front of her three times. She was beginning to think there wasn’t one. She would never give Simon Moody the satisfaction of marrying him but the thought of losing the
ranch made her sick. She needed a way to beat him at his own game. She scanned the papers again and sat up straighter. Who said she had to marry Simon? If she married someone else it would satisfy the clause. The court would back her husband up, whoever that proved to be, if he could prove no payments had been late and that Simon was foreclosing without cause.

  But who would she marry? Lane had proposed but the thought of marrying him held little more appeal than marrying Simon. Tristan might propose with a little encouragement. Did she want him proposing? She knew he visited saloons and brothels. What man didn’t visit those places? a nagging voice asked. Jonathon doesn’t, she answered; then pushed the thought away. Jonathon wasn’t the topic here.

  Her eyes fell to a newspaper on her desk and she picked it up. Many men placed ads for wives, why couldn’t she advertise for a husband? She pulled a sheet of paper forward and started composing an ad to place in nearby papers.

  Wanted: Christian man to wed nineteen-year-old widow and mother of one and help run ranch. Must be of upstanding character and a letter of recommendation from family minister preferred. Need response soon. Please respond at:

  Alexandria wrote in her address and surveyed the letter. Did she really want to do this? It was almost like selling herself. She cringed at the thought. She couldn’t think like that or she would lose her nerve. What would her husband expect of her? Would he expect children right away? The thought of sharing her bed with a man, any man really, made her shudder. Just considering it so soon after Nick’s attack on her brought horrible memories to the surface. Maybe the man would allow her a little time to get to know him. That would work. She had never really been kissed in a way she could call pleasant. That’s not true, she amended to herself. Jonathon had kissed her and she had enjoyed it.

  Annoyed at her own thoughts, Alexandria shoved them aside. She didn’t want to be hurt and she didn’t want to hurt anyone. This way neither she nor her husband would go into the marriage blindly and no one would be hurt, she told herself. She would not marry a man who loved her knowing she didn’t love him as well. Alexandria stiffened her resolve, changed into an appropriate dress to wear to town and went in search of Jonathon. Her rest would have to wait. She found him already preparing to go to town. He hitched the buggy rather than saddling Raven and escorted her to town.