After Always (Always Series Book 5)

by Lindsay Becs

I’m fixing dinner after work when I hear the door slam shut.

  “LP? What’s wrong?” I ask, yelling after her as she stomps through the house.

  “Tilly won’t let me and Jesse play,” she yells with her hands on her hips.

  That seems weird. “Why not?”

  She shrugs her shoulder. “I think he got in trouble at school or something,” she grumbles. Yeah, she knows more than she’s saying.

  I lift a questioning brow at her. “Fine, he got suspended,” she tells me. turning around. “Again,” she adds before slamming her door shut. OK, then.

  I finish making dinner while Penny stews in her room. After we eat and she finishes homework, we play a few games of Uno before it’s time for her to shower and get ready for bed. Once I kiss her and tuck her in, I grab a beer and head outside.

  “Got another one of those?” I hear Tilly ask before my ass has time to touch the chair I’m aiming for. Without a word, I go back inside and grab one for her, popping the top and handing it to her once I’m back outside. She’s seated in one of the chairs I have out back while I choose the lounge chair.

  It’s reminiscent of the night a few months ago when we sat here and I kissed her. We haven’t talked about it, brought it up, or done anything like it since. In fact, we’ve hardly acknowledged each other’s presence altogether. Basically, we kissed and have been acting like middle schoolers ever since.

  We go about our days, weaving in and out of each other’s lives as neighbors and friends, helping when we feel lost raising these kids we’re clueless about or borrowing a cup of sugar—or a beer—when needed.

  I know I don’t want to cross a line with her. I’m not ready to date, and I never want to string anyone along, least of all Tilly. She deserves better than that. I’m glad she’s never pushed and isn’t clinging in that sense. Besides LP, Tilly is my best friend these days.

  “If he keeps this up, he’s going to end up in jail. I don’t know what to do with him anymore. The only thing he seems to care about at all is Penny, and that’s a hell of a lot to put on a little girl,” Tilly starts rambling as I sit. “He peed in a trashcan in science class.” My eyes go wide before I burst out laughing. “It’s not funny, Travis! He got suspended for a week. Now, I have to take the time off of work and will probably lose my job.”

  “He can go with me to Pretty Girl. He seems to like cars, and at twelve, he’s old enough to help.”

  “You’d do that?”

  I shrug. “Sure. It’s no big deal.” Except it’s a really big deal. This is exactly the age I was when Roger took me in and started to teach me about cars and engines because I had nowhere else to go. Why is this kid like a replica of me?

  “Travis… thank you.”

  “It’s—” I pause because just then, I see Jesse’s window open. I watch as he waits for a minute, probably waiting for Penny, before he throws a paper airplane out. I’m captivated watching it play out in front of me. He stands there, waiting, and then he smiles, the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on his face since he moved in with Tilly.

  “What are you watching?” Tilly asks before she leans over to see what I’m looking at. “That little shit!” She starts to get up when she sees him climb out of his window and start toward my house.

  “Let him go,” I tell her, putting my hand on her arm to stop her. She gives me a quizzical look. “Just… trust me. He needs this. Her. It’s OK.”

  “But—” she starts to protest again.

  “Trust me,” I cut her off.

  “I do.”

  When I go back inside, I pull down my box and find the letter I never understood until now. It’s one of the few I haven’t read yet. “Roger” is written on the envelope.

  Hey, baby,

  So, either Roger passed away or he’s still living, heading toward 150, and it’s what I’m thinking it is…

  Roger was so special to you. I could see that before I think you even understood what he was to you. He was your mentor, your teacher, your friend, your confidant, your sounding-board, and your role model. There are very few people, men especially, that would do what Roger did for you. Not just selling the garage to you, but taking you under his wing at such a young age.

  He once told me that you reminded him of himself when he was younger and he wished someone would have taken him in to help steer him away from the many mistakes he made. You were his second chance. He lives through you and loves you like a son.

  Now, it’s your turn. You’ll know when it’s right. When that troubled kid enters your life and you see yourself in them. Be the mentor they need. Give them their second chance to start over and make things right. Use the life you’re given for good. Because you have so much good in you to share.

  Always,

  Josie

  The next morning, I drop Penny at school because I don’t like her walking alone, before bringing Jesse to Pretty Girl with me. We pull in, and he follows me in silence to my office, where I give him a shirt to wear. He snorts when he catches it and pulls it on over the shirt he’s already wearing.

  “Sit,” I instruct him. He rolls his eyes and falls into a chair. “Jesse, I’m not your enemy. I’m trying to help.”

  “Yeah, help by having me do free labor for you,” he scoffs.

  “Listen, if you like working here, I’ll gladly keep you on past the next four days and pay you. But the next four days, yeah, you’re mine. You messed up, kid, and it needs to stop.”

  “Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard it all from Tilly already. I’m self-destructing and will end up in jail if I don’t start making wise choices,” he says in a mocking tone.

  Gritting my teeth, I turn to him with nothing but seriousness. “You like hanging with Penny?” He takes a minute but nods. “You like sneaking into her room at night?” His cocky demeanor changes then. “Jesse, look, I was you. I had a terrible home life, and I did the same thing. I’d sneak into the window of my best friend—although he was a boy, not a girl—and it would make me feel safe. I’m not going to take that away from you. Yet. But if you keep messing up, then I will.” He nods at me, knowing. “This is the last chance. This is your chance to do the right thing. I know it sucks sometimes and it’s a little less exciting, but stop trying to kill your aunt. She’s trying pretty damn hard to give you everything you need, including a loving home.”

  “It’s not about Tilly,” he throws back at me.

  “You mad about what life threw at you? I get that too. But you can’t change what’s already been done. As much as you might want to. So, use the life you’re given for good,” I echo Josie’s words to him. He drops his head and nods again.

  “Jesse,” I start again but wait for him to look at me. “I’m here. Anytime. I know we’re dudes and don’t do mushy shit like girls, but if you need anything or there’s ever anything you need to ask or talk about that you can’t with Tilly, I’m just next door.”

  “Thanks, Mr. Gellar,” he mumbles, and I feel good. I can do this. We can do this.

  “Come on, kid. Let’s see if you’re any good.”

  Chapter 8

  Travis

  Seven Years After Josie

  The whole family is here in Graves for Tatum and Benton’s wedding. They’re finally going to stop living in sin and get married today.

  Things picked up speed when she found out she was expecting again. She was mortified to have another baby without being married first, even if the two of them lived as if they were already married anyway. None of us cared one way or another. Not like Ollie and Bex have tied the knot yet either. Sinners. All of them!

  Sinners or not, I was pretty choked up when Tatum asked me to walk her down the aisle. I thought she’d choose Ollie, but she chose me.

  “Ready for this, Tate?” I ask as we wait our turn to walk down the snow-covered path to the gazebo in the middle of the botanical garden where they are marrying.

  “I’ve been ready since the first time he called me Sugar.” She smiles, looking the most relaxed and content I�
��ve ever seen her. She puts a hand on her just-beginning-to-show stomach. “Let’s go get your daddy, little one.”

  She looks up at me with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on her face, hooking her glove-covered hand through my arm. We walk to where Benton, Ollie, Penny, and Poppy are waiting ahead of us. Tatum’s white velvet cape blows behind her as our feet crunch under the snow. I’m careful to hold her tight so she doesn’t slip in the heels she’s wearing, regardless of the weather and her pregnant state. Some things never change.

  The ceremony is short and sweet outside in the cold as snow slowly falls, kissing all of us just as Josie would if she was here. Closing my eyes, I tilt my head back to feel the wet flakes touch my skin. I feel you, pretty girl.

  In true Benton fashion, he rented out a pub in the city for the night for their reception. Friends, family, and racers joined as we all celebrated the union of Tatum and Benton together.

  “Dance with me, Trav,” Tate says, finding me in a corner watching everyone around me.

  Giving her a grin, I stand and take her hand, leading her to the center of the small space where others are attempting to dance.

  “Thank you for walking me down the aisle today.”

  “It was my honor, Tate.”

  “When it started to snow, I could feel her,” she whispers leaning her head on my shoulder.

  “Me too.”

  “You’re unusually quiet. Is it because you now know for sure that your little sister isn’t a virgin?” I ask Ollie with a smile as we sit outside sharing a beer while the girls and Benton—poor guy—are at the baby shower.

  “Dick.” He gives me a side-eye, taking a swig of his beer, making me laugh.

  “Bex can’t have kids,” he says after a bit.

  “What?” I sit up, turning serious with my best friend.

  He nods his head slowly. “She had an ectopic pregnancy a year ago and when they went in to…” he trails off. “Anyway, there’s a lot of scar tissue and damage. And the good side doesn’t ovulate anymore. We have, like, a two percent chance of ever getting pregnant and her actually delivering.”

  “Shit, man. Why didn’t you say anything before?”

  “She doesn’t like people knowing about stuff.”

  “But I’m not people.”

  “I know. You’re my dad.”

  “Shut up,” I laugh, shoving his shoulder. “Do you need anything? You doing alright with everything?”

  “We’ve talked about adopting, but I think we’re both still just in shock. We thought we’d still have a decent chance to have a baby of our own. But then she went to make sure everything was alright before we started to actively try, and that’s when everything else came to light. We just found out last week.” He picks at the label on his beer bottle for a second. “It’s so fucked up. She works with kids at the hospital every day. She’s damn good with kids and yet can’t have her own. It’s tragic.”

  “It’s not the end though, Ollie. It’ll happen for you guys when it’s right. You’ll find the perfect kid who needs you.”

  “Yeah.” He smiles. “I hope so because I never want to see that look of pain on her face ever again.”

  “I really am sorry.”

  “Meanwhile, my sister keeps getting herself knocked up by a British bad boy I wish I could hate, but he’s so good to her and Poppy.”

  “I can’t believe she’s having another baby,” I tell him. “I never thought she’d love motherhood as much as she does.”

  “Right?”

  “She’s always been awesome with Penny, but seeing her with her own kid is pretty awesome to watch,” I add.

  “And the fact that she actually shows emotions other than pissed off is pretty awesome too,” Ollie says like a true brother.

  As fate would have it, a week after Ollie told me about Bex, there was a baby abandoned at the hospital where they both work. Blessings from snow, babies dropped at hospitals. It all feels like Josie’s hand is still in our lives, guiding her kids along the way.

  Maxwell came home with Ollie and Bex, and all of us immediately fell in love with him. He is simply the cuddliest baby I’ve ever encountered.

  Tatum also gave birth to Harrison a few weeks after, and just like that, we went from having girls running our lives to it being the boys ruling the family.

  Max and Harry have been the perfect addition to the Duncan/King/Gellar clan. Penny is smitten with her new baby cousins, and Poppy, although an adjustment to not being the baby anymore, is beginning to love her baby brother and cousin too. I think.

  It seems to be the year for babies and weddings. Today we’re all at the courthouse to celebrate both. Ollie and Bex are getting married in one room and then stepping to the judge’s chambers to officially adopt Max.

  The two of them can’t seem to keep their hands off each other as the poor judge shakes his head with a smile when they stand there not holding hands like normal people. No, Ollie and Bex get married with their hands on each other’s asses, all while wearing shirts that say “I Became His/Her Mrs./Mr. & Together We Became His Mommy/Daddy.”

  We all celebrate back at my place. It’s a day filled with laughter, loud noise, crying babies and lots of kissing.

  After everyone leaves, I feel exhausted. As great of a day as it was, I’m spent, just drained. I love and hate days like these. They make me miss Josie so much and wish she was here with all of us, where she should be.

  I pull a letter from my box that I’ve been dying to read. “Ollie Finally Found Someone to Marry Him?!”

  Travis, are you for real right now?

  Ollie, bless his heart, I was nervous he’d never be able to find someone to put up with him and his antics. She has to be incredible though. Not to mention, if they tied the knot, that means she sees him for all that he is and has to offer. I’m so happy for him. For them! Ohmygosh! My baby boy got married!

  Does she wear my ring? Someone special needs to wear it and show it off. It means everything to me. I’m looking at it on my finger right now, but soon I’m tucking it in a letter for Ollie. But for a little bit longer, it’s mine.

  There is so much love in this little piece of jewelry. I will never forget the love you gave me each and every day.

  I love you.

  Always,

  Josie

  “Happy birthday, dear Penny! Happy birthday to you!” We all sing to Penny as she sits in front of a cake with ten candles that Tilly made, making her freckle face glow.

  “Make a wish, Pen!” Ollie yells at her as she closes her eyes before blowing out the candles. We all clap and yell excitedly, celebrating her ten years. “Double digits are serious, Pen. Life only goes up from here.”

  When Tilly takes the cake to the kitchen to cut into perfect slices, I follow her to help. “I got it,” she says over her shoulder as she begins plating the cake.

  “You aren’t an octopus. I can help carry in plates of cake,” I tell her, taking a couple of slices in to Penny and Jesse to start. She follows me, setting down four more plates, throwing me a challenging look. Oh, it’s on.

  We finish the celebration of Penny, which mainly entailed cake and copious games played. We’ve moved on from Uno through the years, but it’s still the standard.

  Once all the babies start to whine, everyone packs up and says their goodbyes. Penny seems to have had a good day, and I’m glad that she likes simple and small. That, I can do.

  She and Jesse take off to her room to hang out. Tilly heads to the kitchen and begins cleaning up.

  “Stop. You don’t have to do that,” I tell her, but she tosses a look over her shoulder at me for the second time today. “You made the cake and didn’t let me pay for it. I can clean up the few forks we used and wipe down the counter,” I press.

  She keeps ignoring me, and when she picks up the coffee pot and starts to clean that too, I don’t think; I just react.

  “Damn it, Cookie!” I yell, picking up a piece of uneaten cake and throwing it at her. “Oh, shit! I’m so
rry!” I laugh as it lands in her curly brown hair.

  She freezes. “Did you just throw cake at me?”

  “No?”

  “Liar!” she yells, turning and throwing a piece of cake right back, nailing me in the chest, giggling at herself.

  I pick up another piece and slowly walk toward her. “No, Travis, please no,” she pleads between giggles.

  I stop right in front of her once she’s pinned with her back up against the sliding door. I smile at her, lifting the cake, and she closes her eyes in anticipation, but I take a bite of it instead. “Mmmm… that’s good cake.” She opens one eye and sees me chewing and begins to relax. “Here, try some,” I say as I smash the cake in her face.

  She doesn’t hesitate as she leans forward and wipes her face all over my shirt. “Thanks,” she says, patting my arm and ducking away from me, heading toward the sink. She washes her hands and I think she’s done, but then she turns with the sprayer in her hand pointed directly at me, drenching my shirt. “You looked like you needed help cleaning off,” she says with a satisfied smile on her face. I stare at her slack-jawed as she soaks me and floods my kitchen.

  “You are gonna regret that,” I tell her when she turns off the water. I remove my cake-stained and water-logged shirt and throw it at her face. While she’s trying to catch her bearings, I reach for her and pick her up, throwing her over my shoulder and carrying her outside.

  I carry her all the way to her house, where I walk in like it’s my place and set her in the shower. Turning it on, I let the cold water rain down on her. She’s yelling after me as I turn and walk out and back home with a smug smile on my face. I win.

  Chapter 9

  Travis

  Eight Years After Josie

  “Damnit, Penny!” I yell when I trip over Bear’s pile of toys he made in front of the door.