Prime Choice

by Stephanie Perry Moore

  Just when I thought my night was going to be boring, there was a knock on the door. It was Damarius and Cole. I really did regret the car brawl. I deeply hoped we could work it out.

  “I figured since we got all these recruiting meets coming up, there was no need to keep this stress between us,” Cole said as I opened the door.

  “No, I’m glad y’all here. D, I shouldn’t have grabbed your neck like that, man.”

  Damarius responded, “No, I shouldn’t have called you a punk. I pushed you too far.”

  It was cool that the two of us could relate, but I had to drop a bomb on them. I told them they couldn’t keep going with me to recruiting visits. That was another thing my father had made clear over the last couple of days. The meetings were limited to me and my family only. Since Cole had already committed to South Carolina, I didn’t think that he would be too broken up about it, which turned out to be the case. But Damarius went off on me.

  “See, man, you making everything personal. We came over here to apologize, you grabbed my neck, and now you wanna tell me I can’t come along for the ride to try and get schools interested in me! I know once I show the coaches what I got, the stuff on film, they will wanna sign me on the spot. And now you taking that chance away from me. That ain’t cool, Perry. That ain’t cool.”

  “What you talking ’bout? This don’t have anything to do with me,” I told him.

  I was sick and tired of having to carry the two of them. Yeah, they were my boys and all, but dang! Cole had found his way. Why couldn’t Damarius let it go and find his? If he had shown enough on film himself and had better grades, he’d have opportunities.

  I said, “Call up the coaches, then. Give them your case personally.”

  “Like anybody is going to answer my phone calls.”

  “I didn’t make the rules. Me and my dad are having some issues right now. I’m not rocking the boat more, D,” I said.

  “All you need to do is tell your dad it doesn’t matter what the school says. If you come with twenty people, and they want you bad enough, they will accommodate and give you twenty game tickets. The schools will let your guests eat the food, tour the campus, anything. The red carpet is gon’ be laid out for you and anyone you want to bring.”

  “My father didn’t want me to push schools like that. He and I, as I just said, are having issues and I don’t want to force this. Cole is already straight. You may not get to go to a Division 1 school. It ain’t like the world’s going to end.”

  Damarius got up close to me with watery eyes. “Easy for you to say. You got a ton of ’em you can choose from, but now my choices are limited ’cause you won’t stand up for your boy. Come on, Cole, man, I don’t even know why we came over here.”

  “Hey, you just showing me your true colors. Why would I want to stand up for somebody that gets mad when I can’t give them what they want?”

  “It’s just my future, Perry,” Damarius said with passion.

  “So, then show it on the football field. We got eight or nine more games! I can’t get you into a college; you gotta do it for yourself.”

  “You could try.”

  “I took you to South Carolina, man. You were loud, rude, chasing skirts—you were a little embarrassing.”

  “Oh, so now I’m embarrassing? Cole, let’s go, man. Let’s go!” Damarius shouted at our friend.

  “So, you think I’m wrong, too, Cole?” I asked as he went to the door.

  “Hey, I’m out of this. I just know you two need to see each other’s side. I can understand and appreciate both of them.”

  Damarius went on down the driveway, talking loud, obnoxious stuff. I didn’t hear half of what he was saying. In his own weird way, he was telling me off. But you know where he was saying it—not in my face.

  I had no problems walking in the hallways alone. This year Tori’s classes were way on the other side of the school, so we agreed to just see each other at lunch and after practice. Most mornings she found me, and I gave her a peck. However, for the most part I walked alone. Today, though, my friend Justin came up next to me.

  “Yo, man, why you been avoiding me?” Justin questioned.

  “What you talkin’ about?” I asked.

  Justin explained. “We get out of one class together and then when we head to the next together, you leave so fast like you embarrassed to be seen with me or somethin’. I thought we cleared all that mess up about you was gon’ let me hang out with you a little more so I can feel the hint of popularity. You reneging on that promise?”

  Why does everybody think the world revolves around them? No matter what I do, it’s never enough for my friends. Folks always wantin’ stuff from me. Schools wantin’ me to sign, girls wantin’ my time, and now this knucklehead thinks I can make him popular.

  “It was not a fluke at the party, man. You were a hit to be with because of how you were acting. Just be you. You’re smart and you’re great. Quit thinking you need to hang with me for everything. I got my own issues. And trust me, man; my space isn’t all that good right about now.”

  “Yeah, I heard you didn’t wanna help yo boy get into college.”

  “What? That’s the word that’s going around? How you gon’ believe that crap, anyway? Damarius is flunking out of school and getting beat on many long passes. If he wants to go to college he better pass the SAT and worry ’bout his own game.”

  Justin said, “Hey, I’m simply saying that just ’cause you got it going on, doesn’t mean you can’t worry about your friends.”

  Justin walked off from me. That was a good thing, too, ’cause if he would’ve stayed in my face it would’ve been on! I was sick of Tori. I was sick of Damarius. I was sick of my dad. Now I was sick of Justin. Shoot, I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

  Being Perry Skky Jr. was a lot. Too many expectations. I didn’t mind doing favors sometimes, but I couldn’t please everybody all the time. However, I was going to have to get a grip on it; I’d have to figure out a way to be back in control. I was tired of fighting every minute.

  5

  Yielding to Others

  I was now in a good routine. School had been in for a while. I had adjusted to my tougher classes, understood what the coaches expected, and our team was clicking. We were winning games. We hadn’t lost one yet. I didn’t mind being at practice and giving 100 percent. The outcome was paying off in a big way. Colleges were still calling. And I was still the man.

  I was feeling real lonely, though. Tori and I were still an item but we hadn’t really figured out how we were gon’ work this thing. My dad and I were cordial toward each other. He’d given me my car back, but we weren’t the best of friends or anything. And my boys—though Cole and I were cool, I hadn’t seen much of him or Damarius. So, when Damarius and I ran a drill together for Coach Robinson, I eased off and let my old buddy get all the glory.

  A teammate shouted, “Ooh! Sweet interception, Damarius. Do it, boy!”

  Yeah. Letting him catch the ball instead of me seemed to inflate his spirit. He’d been moping around practice for the past couple of weeks and he had a horrible game last Friday. Thankfully, he didn’t lose it for us, but he did get benched, and I wanted him to get his starting job back. All he needed was his confidence. The boy talked so much smack and didn’t deliver. He needed to know he could bring it if given the opportunity. If he tried to look for the opportunity, he could make some big plays.

  “Dang, boy, you beat me on that one,” I said when we got to the sidelines. Coach Robinson didn’t let me say much more after he chewed me out for falling asleep on the play. I just sorta smirked and said, “Yes, Coach. I gotcha.”

  Coach Robinson looked at me eye to eye. I didn’t wanna give away what I was doing. I didn’t want all that Damarius had felt to be taken away from him because it was called out that I missed the play on purpose.

  So I said, “Coach, I’ma do better next time. He just beat me, that’s all.”

  “Yeah, okay. You better do better next ti
me. Damarius, good job, son. That’s the kinda action I need to see Friday night.”

  When practice was over, Damarius came over to me and said, “Dang, man, I didn’t mean to do you like that today!”

  “Naw, cuz you beat me fair and square,” I said as we slapped hands.

  “Sorry we haven’t been connecting lately. Perry, I miss hanging out, man,” he said to me. “I’ve just been having some issues lately that I’ve been meaning to run by you. Can we talk? We still boys, right?”

  “Always,” I told him as we slapped hands again and hugged.

  “Oh, look at the two of y’all! Friends again, huh?” Cole asked as he came in between us and put us both in a headlock.

  “That hurts!” I said.

  Damarius yelled, “Come on, Cole, man!”

  “Well, I’m going let the two of y’all handle it. Briana and I are about to head and get some ice cream or somethin’,” Cole joked in a mischievous way.

  “Be smart, partner, and I’ll take the knucklehead home,” I said. Damarius usually rode home with Cole.

  When we got in the car, it was time for me or Damarius to initiate conversation. It had been such a while since the two of us had been together that our flavor didn’t feel like usual. I knew I needed to break down and be the bigger man and apologize for some things I’d said to him. He didn’t deserve me reducing him to nothing the last time we were in my house. Though that wasn’t my intention, I knew it could have been perceived that way.

  So I said, “Hey, man. About the whole recruiting thing, I’m sorry.”

  “You were right, Perry. You said some things I needed to hear. Can’t depend on you to get into college. That catch today proved I gotta show up. I gotta play on Friday nights. I’ve gotta get the scouts to look at me, you know. I know you’re a good friend, Perry, and I know you’d do anything for me, but you’re right about me doing stuff for myself. But there are some things I need your help with.”

  “What, man? What’s going on?” I could tell he had a heavy heart.

  Whispering he said, “I couldn’t mention this in front of Cole because he’d probably laugh or rag on me to the whole team. But, it’s pretty serious. Lately, I’ve been having a burning sensation every time I use the bathroom.”

  I had no idea Damarius was trying to talk to me about some personal situation like that. He was creeping me out. However, I stayed calm, kept the car on the road and listened. Now I knew why even though it was just the two of us in the car, he was speaking softly. This couldn’t get out.

  He continued, “Ciara went to the doctor, and she got gonorrhea. They said it has to be something I gave her. I know she’s only been with me. I’ve only been with two others: that girl in college and some other girl that ain’t even in school. I don’t know which one of them gave it to me, but I think I need to go get checked out. The joint is hurting. I don’t know where to go, though. You know I don’t have a ride or cash to take care of it.”

  “Don’t you still got that Medicaid card your dad gave you?” I asked, remembering he had showed it to me last year.

  “Yeah.”

  “Well, let’s go see the team doctor. I know where his real practice is.”

  Holding his head down, my buddy said, “You don’t think he’ll ... laugh at me or somethin’?”

  “Man, please. He looks at that stuff for a living. Let’s ride over to see if he can see you real quick.”

  Dr. Hanceby was a real cool white dude. He loved football, too. Told us if we had any physical problems that we could see him anytime.

  “I don’t know, Perry, man. I’m a lil’ nervous,” Damarius said as we pulled into the parking lot of the doctor’s office.

  Thankfully, Dr. Hanceby hadn’t left for the day; he saw us both. I was in one room and Damarius was in the other. He came in to my room.

  “Do you need me to check you down there, too?” he asked.

  “Oh, no! I’m straight there, sir. Just my eye. Want to make sure my cut is healed.”

  “Yeah, right. Your partner over there tells me that you have been having a bit of fun, too.”

  “No, that couldn’t be what he’s been telling you because I’ve been a good boy.”

  “Come on now, Perry. I know all the girls are throwing themselves at you. Some of these STDs are hard to detect; they don’t have symptoms, and you need to be tested.”

  “Doc, man, I’m serious! I’m straight.”

  “Okay,” he said reluctantly as he looked at my eye. “I see you still have a nice gash there.”

  “Yes, and it’s still tender to touch.”

  He doctored on it a bit, and then gave me some new ointment. He still looked at me like I needed to confess. I didn’t feel comfortable talking about my sexual life with him. But he was a doctor. I knew folks were guilty by association. Since Damarius was brought in under those circumstances, the doc insisted I was lying. But when he kept pushing even after I told him I wasn’t with the multiple partner thing yet, or any partners at all, for that matter, he didn’t come up off me until I blurted out that I was a virgin.

  “All right, I think that’s great. Abstinence is definitely the best answer.”

  Oddly I felt less significant in his eyes admitting that. “You think I’m a punk, huh?”

  “With the skills you got on the field, man, there’s no way I could think that. I actually admire you. You could be playing with young ladies’ minds, but you’re not doing that.”

  “I am trying to be sexually active, but my girl’s not ready.”

  “You do know what to do when she is, right? Even though it may be the first time for both you guys, you have got ...”

  Cutting him off before he gave me the condom talk, I said, “I’m straight, Doc.”

  “Well, come to me with any questions. About your boy having an STD, he said I could talk to you about it,” Dr. Hanceby said. Man, I hated Damarius had dragged me in it. “He’s going to be on medication for a while, and he’s gotta keep stuff to himself for a bit as well. Sex is nothing to play with; you don’t know who’s been with whom. So to avoid all that, help him do what you’re doing. Trust me, you have plenty of time to be grown up ... later on. Right now enjoy what you got going on: football and school. I wish all teens could get by without sex.”

  “Again, Doc, I’m not all proud of that or anything. I’m not trying to tell the world that I’m a virgin.”

  “You should be proud, though. That status is more impressive than any catch you could ever make. Knowing that you’re not pushing your girl to do something she doesn’t want to do or not leaving for not doing it makes me respect you even more.”

  I heard all that he was saying. I didn’t deserve all his respect. I certainly wanted to push Tori to give me what I thought I needed. Maybe he was telling me that I was cool the way I was. As I walked out empty-handed and Damarius came out with his hands full of pills that he was going to have take for a lil’ bit, I knew my way was better.

  “Don’t say I told you so,” he said to me.

  “Look, I’m just glad gonorrhea’s all you got and you caught it early. How about that? My lips are sealed.”

  “Thanks, man,” Damarius said, as he nodded, agreeing his fate could have been much worse.

  We rode home in silence as we pumped up the music, bopped our heads and cruised down the street. I was glad he got his medicine, and I was glad that I wasn’t a playboy. Being Damarius’s friend again taught me up close and personal that not getting some action was definitely a good thing.

  Friday night lights were here and up again. The coach called me to his office after the team had our dinner.

  “Before we get on the road and travel to Greene County for this game, I want to tell you, son, that I’ve been watching you during practice. You make the players feel like they’re better than they really are. You haven’t been catching the catches I know you can, so others around here can look good. I hope that doesn’t show in your performance tonight.”

  “Oh, no, sir.
I haven’t been doing that.”

  “Cut the bull. You’ve done it and a ton of times. But it’s actually commendable; it’s giving them something they need: hope. You’ve raised your level of playing. And even with Marlon back, you two have not been so adversarial, and I know that’s because of your leadership. I want you to give the pregame speech to the team. Just tell them that there’s no “I” in the word. Can you do that?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  Thirty minutes later, the team was all huddled close to hear what I was going to say to motivate them. We’d been operating pretty well as a team. Neither Coach nor I wanted that to change going into hostile territory.

  Cautiously I said, “I am the captain of this team. And I know over the last couple of weeks it’s been said in the papers that I’ve won the game for us after a catch here or a run there. However, I don’t believe that hype. We won the last three games because this team has been phenomenal. Defense has had offense’s back when we couldn’t score. Our kicker hasn’t missed one all season long, special teams have always put us in great field positions, and our quarterback is the bomb. Now we’ve got another weapon to throw. You know Marlon ain’t my favorite person, but he’s a heck of a football player. And if we all come together and put our pride, our differences, our own special talents aside, and play for the good of the team, then no one will be able to stop us. Not even these snotty rich boys we ’bout to play tonight. So when you’re riding there on the bus, think about doing your best for the team. If we all play our best, it’s a victory fo’ sho.”

  “We can beat ’em!” Damarius shouted.

  Three hours later we were playing in front of a packed stadium for the home team. As soon as we stepped on that field we showed them who was for real. We showed them we were a team on a mission. We played as a unit and threw down.