Bestselling Bastard : A Hero Club Novel

by Nicole Rodrigues

  “I’m sorry, Jenna, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

  Soraya’s voice travels across the darkened kitchen and I shake my head.

  “No, you didn’t. It’s okay,” I whisper, walking to her and taking a seat at the island across from her.

  “Tea?”

  I nod as she reaches for the tea kettle, pushing a mug to me and pouring the steaming water. I reach for a teabag in the box between us and steep it, taking a cautious sip.

  “Sorry if I invaded your space,” I apologize, now realizing maybe she didn’t want any company.

  “Not at all, I’ll always embrace company.”

  She smiles at me and I see so much of Lorenzo in her, it comforts my frantic heartbeat. I pull my gaze away, taking a sip of my tea as I look down at the island.

  “Have you enjoyed your time in New York so far? You guys got to explore most of the city?”

  “It’s beautiful. A little overwhelmin’. I didn’t realize how massive it is,” I laugh, looking up at her.

  “It’s my favorite time to be living in the city. There’s something about New York during Christmas time. People are nicer, they smile more, aren’t such assholes," Soraya laughs, shaking her head.

  I laugh too, taking another sip of my tea.

  “We only encountered one today.”

  “I hope my son’s Italian blood boiled and gave that asshole a piece of his mind,” Soraya deadpans.

  I nod, taking a sip of my tea.

  “He did. I guess I wasn’t followin’ the rules of the sidewalk and stopped to take it all in a little too long. Now I know where the ‘Italian Stallion’ comes from.”

  “Good boy,” Soraya says softly.

  We’re silent, both of us unsure of what to say now and we continue to sip our tea. I want to tell her how amazing her son is. That however they raised him, they did an incredible job but words escape me. The emotions of the past few days are catching up to me, feeling all the love this family has for each other that I never got to feel. I wipe at my eyes, embarrassed now that I’m silently crying in the kitchen sitting with Lorenzo’s mother. I try to press my lips together, keeping my sobs quiet but my sniffle echoes off the kitchen walls and I see Soraya’s head snap my way.

  “Oh, Jenna,” she coos, hopping off her seat to walk over to me.

  “S-sorry,” I mumble with a laugh through my tears. “I just...it’s been...a lot.”

  Slowly she wraps her arms around me and I've never needed a hug more in my entire life. I hug her back tightly, needing her warmth and love to wrap around me and tell me everything is going to be okay. I want this. I want this all so badly but I know what will happen when I let Lorenzo too close. He has an amazing family and I could rip him away from them if I allow my heart to love him.

  “Shh...it’s okay. It’s okay. You’re safe, you’re okay.”

  She wraps her arm around my neck, pulling my cheek to her chest as I hug her tighter, crying into her soft body. She smells amazing, like vanilla mixed with a hint of strawberries and I imagine her as my mother for the briefest of seconds. She doesn’t seem like she takes shit and she probably was a tough love type of mother but I can see the relationship she has with Lorenzo and his father and know that despite her tough exterior, she would go to the ends of the earth for the people she loves.

  “H-how do you k-know that I...I needed to hear you say that?” I whisper, wiping my nose with the back of my hand to keep my snot from her perfect skin.

  “Because when I look at you...I see myself,” she admits softly, pulling me away so she can look at me.

  I wipe at my eyes, drying my cheeks as she helps, giving me a supportive smile.

  “My father...my father left me and my mother when I was young. He...he got a new family, a wife, children…”

  My mouth parts, shocked by this revelation as her own eyes start to glaze over.

  “I put so many men in his place, pushed so many away including Graham, thinking they would all leave and do the same thing my father did. If he could leave me, his own daughter, why would another man stay?”

  She shakes her head, wiping at her own eyes now and something about her confession, about her vulnerability shatters my heart. That's exactly how I feel.

  “Graham wasn’t my father just like Lorenzo isn’t yours. There are good men out there, Jenna, and when you find one, you need to put aside your fears and let them inside. It takes time and sacrifice, insecurities will always plague you but you have to trust the love you built together. Trust that it will always win out over everything else.”

  I see a single tear drip down her cheek but she doesn’t push it away this time. She lets herself cry, a smile on her face as she stands, giving me one last hug before putting her mug in the sink and slipping out of the kitchen. I hear muffled voices in the hallway and tiptoe near them, putting my own mug into the sink and see two shadows hugging in the hallway.

  “I love you, Soraya. I love you so fucking much.”

  “I love you too. Take me to bed.”

  Her voice is no longer strained like it was seconds ago and I wonder how it feels to have the pain be stripped away, to fully trust someone to take away those insecurities and uncertainties from your mind and heart.

  I close my eyes, knowing Lorenzo does that for me and I can allow him to but at what cost? I refuse to be selfish enough to give into this, let him love me, let myself love him if in the end, it will tear him from this family, tear him from me. Can I really sit by and watch him promise his life to someone else one day? Can I stand there, knowing that I will never, ever get to feel his touch again?

  I don’t have a choice. The more time I spend with him, the more I know I won’t be able to let him go. I’m only human and sooner or later, our primal instinct will take over. Selfishness. The need to just give into this will eventually be too strong but I have to be stronger. I won’t let him suffer the same fate as Fynn did, I can’t. I won’t survive it this time, neither of us will.

  Chapter 11

  Jenna

  Lorenzo, Soraya, Graham and I sit on the couch in the living room, sipping our coffees as the front door opens and Cannoli hops off my lap to see who it is.

  "Hello! Merry Christmas!"

  A dark haired woman with dark brown eyes and a similar face to Graham’s saunters into the room holding a bottle of wine and a huge bag of gifts.

  "Where's Lionel?" Soraya asks, giving the woman a tight, big hug.

  "We can chat about it later," the dark haired woman says, causing Soraya to stiffen but quickly recover with a smile.

  "Hey, dufus," Lorenzo chides, hugging the woman who I presume now to be Chloe, his half sister.

  "Hi, idiot. Merry Christmas." She pulls her gaze to me and her smile widens as does her eyes. "You must be Jenna. I saw your live video last year, it was hilarious," she says, walking toward me.

  She puts her hand out for me to shake and I take it in my own, smiling at her.

  "Jenna, meet my sister, Chloe. Chlo, this is Jenna."

  "Ah, the sister. Lorenzo always talks about you. She's totally not a troll, you jerk. She's gorgeous."

  I wink at Chloe as Lorenzo chokes on his coffee and gives me the death stare.

  "Oh, I like you! What the hell are you doing with my brother?"

  She flips Lorenzo the middle finger, getting scolded by Soraya and Graham. Brushing them off, she laces her arm through mine as we walk out into the living room, grabbing a bottle of champagne, orange juice and two glasses.

  "So how's things going between you two? He told me you guys had a deadline this weekend, right? Did you finish?"

  Oh I finished alright. Too many times to count.

  "Y-yeah, we finished."

  I keep my eyes on the orange liquid as she pours me a mimosa, not daring to look up at her. Once she's done, I gulp down a healthy sip before putting it on the coffee table and sit back into the black leather sofa.

  "Ahh...I can recognize that look. I don't want the dirty details but...you like
him, don't you?"

  "We're really good friends, yeah."

  I take another long sip of my drink, keeping my mouth busy.

  "Friends don't blush when they talk about their friends."

  Her smile is knowing as I take another sip and realize it's empty. She eyes me as I eye the champagne bottle and bite my bottom lip.

  "Okay, fine. We...hooked up a few times but we're just friends."

  I speak quickly as I reach over for the bottle and fill my glass halfway, topping it off with a splash of orange juice.

  "Mmm hmm. Famous last words."

  "What are the famous last words?"

  I jump, almost dropping my glass at Lorenzo's voice as he saunters into the living room and plops down on the couch next to me.

  I watch as his throat bobs, drinking down his coffee and remember that being the movement that made me snap back at the cabin. One movement of his Adam's Apple and I climbed him like a fucking monkey on a tree.

  He reaches for my calf, pulling my leg into his lap as he digs his fingers into the heel of my foot and I try with all my might to pretend it does nothing to me.

  "I was just telling Jenna about my friends Heidi and Benny, claiming they're just friends and all," Chloe says with a mischievous glint, dropping her gaze down to where Lorenzo is massaging my socked foot.

  "Everyone always thinks women and men can't be friends. Why is that?" Lorenzo asks, now running a hand up my calf.

  I drop my gaze down to my lap, discreetly taking deep breaths in as my entire body squirms with need.

  "Because vaginas and dicks aren't meant to be just friends. They're meant to...fuck."

  "Gross, Chloe. Don't say fuck. Or dick. Or vagina."

  He gets to my knee and I close my eyes, unable to control my body right now as he’s centimeters away from my scar. I abruptly get to my feet and scramble down the hall to the bathroom, trying to put space between us as I get myself under control.

  I shut the door, locking it and pressing my palm and forehead against the cool wood door. How are we doing this? How the hell can I get what Lorenzo feels like inside me out of my damn head? How do I forget what he tastes like, what he sounds like when I wrap my mouth around him? How do I let him touch me without bringing every goddamn delicious memory to the forefront of my brain? And how the hell do I explain Fynn, explain why we can’t be anything more than...

  A knock on the door rattles my forehead and I jump back.

  "Y-yeah, what's up?"

  "You okay?"

  Lorenzo's voice is concerned and I nod, turning on the water.

  "I'll be out in a minute."

  I wash my hands in cool water, cursing myself for wearing makeup and not being able to cool down my face without fucking it all up.

  After a few minutes, when I think I'm ready to face everything, I open the door to a worried Lorenzo.

  "You okay? I didn't mean to touch your scar I—"

  "I'm fine, it's okay, you didn't. Too much champagne so early in the mornin'," I lie with a shrug.

  We walk back out to the living room and Chloe and Soraya are sitting on the couch rummaging through wrapped boxes as Graham passes them a few from underneath the tree.

  "Here, Jenna. These are yours," Soraya says from her position on the couch, passing a few boxes wrapped so beautifully in red and gold wrapping paper.

  My mouth drops open as I slowly reach for them, feeling like an ass because I didn’t get anything for anyone here. We were in the city all afternoon yesterday, I should have gotten something. Dammit.

  “No, I...I feel terrible I didn’t get anything for—”

  “Don’t you dare,” Soraya warns, pointing her finger at me. “You are our guest, you don’t need to get us a damn thing. We’re so happy you spent Christmas with us, that is more than enough.”

  She gives me such a genuine smile I feel tears welling up in my eyes at her kindness. I smile back, wiping them away before they start pouring down my face without stopping.

  “Thank you,” I whisper, putting the presents on my lap.

  I sit back and wait, watching the Morgan’s all hand out their Christmas presents and tear through them. Handbags, jewelry, scarves and various articles of clothing are pulled from each box as Lorenzo and Chloe drag out a huge 72 inch screen TV for their parents.

  They all hug and kiss and I slowly open my presents, gasping when I see a Macbook box.

  “What in the hell,” I whisper, looking up at a smiling Soraya and Graham. “You...y’all did not have to do this. This is way too much, I...I can’t accept this.”

  I adamantly shake my head, knowing full well I could totally use a new computer but I’ve dragged my feet, keeping most of my earnings in savings.

  I should have bought myself a new computer months ago, especially with how much I use it, but it still turned on, it still allowed me to type all the words so I’ve pushed off the purchase.

  “Please,” Soraya whispers, “we want you to have it.”

  “It’s a thank you gift for putting up with our son for the past year,” Graham jokes.

  Lorenzo scoffs, punching his father in the arm and Graham pulls him close, locking him into a headlock.

  I give Soraya another smile, wiping more tears as I place the box on the couch next to me and walk over to her, wrapping her in a hug that might actually break a rib.

  “Thank you,” I whisper. “Thank you for everything the past few days. I appreciate it so, so much.”

  “I know you do,” she answers softly, hugging me back with the same ferocity I am giving her. “Do amazing things with it, Jenna Watson. I know you can.”

  And just like that, Lorenzo and his family have wormed their way into my heart, making me question everything I have ever known.

  I put all of my presents on my bed, turning around when I hear a knock on the door.

  "I have a surprise for you."

  I smile at Lorenzo, furrowing my brows.

  "Oh yeah? What is it?"

  "Put all this stuff on and meet me at the front door."

  He tosses me a pile of clothes and I catch it, confused as he winks, shutting the door behind him. I put all the clothes on the bed, seeing two long sleeve shirts, a water-proof jacket and pants, thick socks, leggings and a beanie.

  What is he planning?

  I get dressed, braiding my hair to the side as I put the thick beanie on my head. I feel like a snowman, barely able to move with the puffy coat as I walk to the front door. Lorenzo stands there holding up a pair of boots, dressed equally as silly as I am.

  "I checked your size, so hopefully they fit."

  "Where are you takin' me, the North Pole?" I joke.

  "Close. Here, let me."

  He kneels in front of me, patting his knee and I hold myself up on the wall as I lift my foot, letting him put my boot on, then the other.

  We walk out of the condo and head to the elevator and Lorenzo pulls his phone out, taking a selfie of us in our winter gear.

  "You sexy little snow bunny."

  "More like a polar bear," I scoff.

  We get to the front lobby, walking outside; I saw the blanket of white across the city from the windows this morning, but seeing it down here is...breathtaking.

  The white of the snow is so bright, I have to squint my eyes as I look up and down the street, the chaos and traffic from yesterday slowly dwindled down to nothing.

  "The plows haven't been down here yet. Soon it'll turn to disgusting black slush. I wanted you to see it in its beauty."

  "This is incredible. How much is here, it's almost up to my knee!" I squeal, taking a few steps out onto the sidewalk, walking to the huge pile.

  "We got about two feet. Wait!"

  He bends down in front of me, lifting my pants and tucking my leggings into my socks so the snow can't sneak against my skin. He stands, grabbing my hand as we trek through the snow.

  "Took me many frozen ankles to learn that trick. Here we are. Perfect spot for a snowball fight."

 
"What?" I squeak. "I'm at a disadvantage. This ain't fair," I yell, as Lorenzo runs a few feet away from me, dropping down to scoop up snow.

  "All's fair in love and war, Watson! Buck up, country girl!"

  He tosses a snowball at me, hitting me square in the chest as the cold remnants splash into my face.

  "Oh you son of a bitch," I growl.

  "Not nice, J. My ma is a saint!"

  "Yeah, havin' to deal with your crazy ass for twenty-seven years she had to be!"

  I toss the sorry excuse for a snowball at Lorenzo as he ducks away from it, tossing one back at me but I turn as it explodes against the back of my head.

  "This is like beating up a baby, my heart can't take it," Lorenzo laughs.

  I shake my head, dropping down to my knees as I collect snow, patting it tight between my hands as it hardens.

  "There we go."

  I smile, making a few more as I look up, not seeing Lorenzo. I collect the few snowballs I made as I stand and my head collides straight up into a solid block of snow. It crumbles all down my jacket, around my shoulders and hat as some specks get stuck on my eyelashes and I hear the deep throated laugh of the culprit.

  "You mother fucker!" I yell, running after him as best as I can in my boots.

  I get close enough to him and launch myself at his body, wrapping my arms around him in a death grip as we both plummet to the snow.

  I eat a big chunk full as Lorenzo laughs, pushing me to my back and starts to pile it on top of my body.

  "Stop! I'm freezin'!" I yell with a hoarse laugh.

  He stops, panting as he holds himself above me and I see the steam from his breath above my face before his warm lips envelop me with a quick peck on my lips.

  "We gotta work on your snow game, Watson."

  "How about you kiss me again and give me some of those skills."

  As he smiles and drops his head, my fist full of snow comes up and collides with his face as he curses and rolls off of me, freeing me to get away.

  "Sucker," I cackle, as I hobble away from him, glancing quick over my shoulder.

  Lorenzo is laughing with his hands on his knees as he shakes his head.

  "Touché, you asshole."

  I laugh, hands on my hips and shake my head right back.