World Enough and Time

by Lauren Gallagher

  “Like little kids, aren’t they?” Gina laughed.

  “Probably doesn’t help that I baby him.” I smiled and tousled Jester’s forelock, which seemed to pacify him for a second. Nodding toward Dante, I continued. “Anyway, he used to freak out whenever he saw his reflection in the mirror in the arena, but now he goes right by it. Doesn’t even notice. When I put poles on the ground for him to walk over, he used to act like they were going to jump up and bite him, but now he just hesitates a little.”

  “Good.” Gina patted her horse’s neck. “That’s good to hear. Gavin thinks he’ll be ready for that show over in Wenatchee. Do you think he will?”

  Inwardly, I cringed. Though Dante was progressing in leaps and bounds, he hadn’t leapt or bounded quite far enough for me to even consider competing with him. But the boss had spoken, and if I went behind his back, all hell would break loose. At least he knew better than to sign Dante up for the show on Whidbey Island; trailering that horse was bad enough without putting him on a ferry.

  I sighed. “Don’t expect a championship out of him, okay? Let’s go into that show as a training experience for him. Get him acquainted with all the noise and scary things. I think he’ll make it through it, but realistically, I don’t think he’ll be very competitive yet.”

  She scowled. “Really?”

  “That’s the honest truth.” I pushed Jester’s nose away from my pockets, which he alternately nibbled and tried to search for candy or grain. “It’ll be good for him, though. Sooner or later, he’s going to have to get used to show grounds. Might as well be now. By the time he’s ready to compete, he’ll be a seasoned pro at dealing with loudspeakers, crowds, that kind of thing.”

  “Oh,” she said. “Well that does sound like a good idea then. What about trailering him?”

  “That’s going to be a challenge too, but we’ll practice. We have time.” Tugging at Jester’s lead rope, I said, “Let me put this brat away, then I can go ahead and put Dante through his paces.”

  My ride with Dante went smoothly, thank God. After Gina left, I glanced at my phone and couldn’t help but be relieved that I’d killed nearly two hours between talking to her and riding him. That was two hours closer to—

  “Jesus, Dani,” I muttered to myself. Just a few nights with Connor, and I was hooked. I couldn’t help but smile while I let my mind wander back to last night. I’d had great sex in the past—that was one thing I couldn’t complain about with Matt—but nothing like this. Connor left me simultaneously satisfied and hungry for more.

  Just a few more hours to go, and I could have him again. It was probably just as well I had a few hours to recover. I was exhausted from all the things we’d done in lieu of sleeping. Every yawn and every twinge in my hip reminded me of everything he’d done to me, and the aches and fatigue were well worth it. Just a few more hours. A few more—

  “Hey, Danielle!” My boss’s barking voice shook me out of my reverie.

  I turned around, raising my eyebrows in an unspoken, “Yes?”

  He stood beside Xena’s stall with Leslie, his wife. He gestured sharply at the horse. “Did you already work her this morning?”

  “Yeah, I rode her a couple of hours ago, why?”

  He cursed under his breath. “Didn’t I tell you I was going to start riding her?”

  Oh, great, that’ll make her so much easier to work with. Resisting the urge to roll my eyes and get myself fired, I said, “You did, yes, but I didn’t know you wanted to ride her today.”

  “You didn’t ask, did you?” he snapped.

  “Gavin, honestly.” Leslie shook her head and patted his arm. “It’s not that big of a deal. Just ride her tomorrow.” To me, she said, “Is that okay, Dani?”

  “Yeah, yeah, that’s fine,” I said.

  Gavin took a sharp breath, his shoulders tensing as if he was about to release one of his usual tirades. Then he looked at her and, after a second, relaxed. To me, he nodded. “Okay, sure. That’s fine.”

  Leslie smiled at him, and damned if he didn’t return it. A foul mood dissolved as if by magic. And thank God for that.

  The three of us briefly discussed an upcoming show, and Leslie asked for my input about easing Stetson, a gelding recovering from a torn suspensory ligament, back into his training regimen. Then the two of them left me to finish my rides.

  I watched them walk out of the barn, laughing and chatting about something I couldn’t hear. Shaking my head, I went to get Orion out of his stall. I don’t know how you do it, Les. That woman had the patience of a saint to put up with him, and I was thankful every day that she did. She had a calming effect on him like no one else. Without Leslie, Gavin would have been completely unbearable.

  With my bosses out of my hair, I went back to working horses. In no time flat, I was done, and by the time all of my rides were out of the way, there was still time to kill before the end of the day. I considered going home to get a head start on cleaning myself up so I was ready to go when Connor texted me, but there was only so much preening I could do before boredom set in. Knowing me, I’d make the wait even longer by staring at the clock, trying to will my phone to ring, and simply waiting.

  Instead, I jumped at the opportunity to take care of tedious, menial tasks around the farm. Cleaning bridles for a show that was weeks away. Organizing a tack trunk. Not checking my watch every five minutes.

  Around six, my phone beeped and my pulse jumped. Just as I’d hoped, it was a Connorgram.

  So what would it take for me to talk you into my bed tonight?

  Biting my lip and glancing around to make sure no one had materialized behind me to read over my shoulder, I sent back three simple words:

  You just did.

  Chapter Twelve

  Matt was on the phone when I arrived, so he invited me in and gave me a “just a minute” gesture.

  Stepping into the apartment that had been my home for several months was like stepping onto a different planet. Very little had changed, but this wasn’t home anymore. I couldn’t believe it ever had been. Just crossing the familiar threshold, I felt intrusive. Unwelcome.

  At first glance, it was the same aside from the absence of my belongings. When I looked around, though, the differences showed themselves. There were signs of other life here, of someone who was neither Matt nor myself. Someone who had settled in.

  Matt hated coffee, but there was an espresso maker on the kitchen counter. In the middle of the table, a houseplant that looked much too healthy to be strictly under his care. The fan of magazines on the coffee table had a few requisite copies of Field & Stream and Maxim, but otherwise it was too Cosmopolitan and Vogue to belong solely to him. The mailing label on the top copy of Cosmo had the apartment’s address on it, and the letters above it formed an unfamiliar name, but I didn’t look long enough to comprehend exactly what her name was.

  I swallowed hard. This wasn’t my territory anymore, but I couldn’t deny that it hurt to see how quickly he’d moved someone else in. No wonder he wanted me to come pick up my stuff. There wasn’t room in this apartment for the two of them and pieces of me.

  “Sorry about that.” Matt snapped his phone shut. “Here, just these two boxes.” He gestured at the pair of boxes stacked beside the couch. “I’ll help you take them out.”

  “Thanks.” We picked them up and went outside, leaving the crowded apartment behind. Balancing the box on the bumper with my knee, I unlocked the trunk. There wasn’t a lot of room amidst saddle pads, boots, bridles, and a huge bucket of Calypso’s grain supplement, but we managed to wedge the boxes in. I slammed the trunk and we stood in awkward silence.

  “So, um, how have you been?” he asked.

  Getting fucked within an inch of my life almost every night and loving every minute of it. I coughed. “Good, fine. You?”

  He shrugged. “Pretty good.” He shifted his weight. “I’m surprised you haven’t gone back to Cheyenne yet.”

  “I’m staying.”

  He exhaled sharply, h
is lips twisting into a scowl. “Oh.”

  I fought the urge to glare at him. “This is a big city, Matt. There’s room for both of us.”

  “Well, yeah, of course. I just figured, you know, since your family is there, and since we’re…” He hesitated. “Since we’re done, I didn’t think you had a reason to stay.”

  “I can’t afford to go back anyway, so it’s a moot point,” I said through my teeth.

  His shoe scuffed the pavement when he fidgeted. “I can help you out. You know, with paying for it. I did drag you out here, so it seems like the least I can do.”

  “I don’t need your help,” I snapped. Then I shrugged. “And besides, I’m starting to like it here.” Especially now that I’ve discovered some of the friendly natives.

  He laughed. “You? Liking Seattle?”

  “Why wouldn’t I?” I said. “And if you thought I wouldn’t, why did you ask me to come out here with you?”

  He stared at the pavement between us. Neither of us spoke for a moment. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answer to that question, and had I given myself just a second or two to think about it, I wouldn’t have asked in the first place. Evidently he didn’t want to answer either, because he cleared his throat and said, “Well, glad to hear you’re doing okay here.”

  I’m sure you are. “I’m getting by.”

  “Are you, um, are you still working at that place?”

  “Same place I’ve been working since I got here.” I didn’t know why he felt obligated to make small talk with me. Possessions had been exchanged. I had what I came for. There was no reason to drag this out. I flipped my key ring around my finger. “I’d better get going.”

  He jumped, as if unsure what to make of that. “Oh. Um. Okay.”

  I tapped the lid of the trunk. “Thanks for packing this stuff up for me.”

  He smiled. “No problem.” We looked at each other, both shifting uncomfortably. What parting gesture was warranted for a situation like this? A kiss was definitely out. The thought of a hug made my skin crawl. A handshake seemed almost offensively platonic with someone with whom I’d been so intimate at one time.

  Finally, I just said, “Well, I’ll see you around.”

  “Yeah, I’ll see you around.”

  With just a brief exchange of uncomfortable smiles, he went back to his apartment and I got in the car. On my way out of the parking lot, taking the last few pieces of the past to my new home, I glanced in the rearview a couple of times. His apartment building faded into the distance, then disappeared altogether when I turned down a side street.

  Maybe jealousy and bitterness were clouding my memory, but I was sure I’d enjoyed being around Matt over the last four years. I was sure that at one time, looking at him had made my heart skip. After we’d broken up, I distinctly remembered pining for him and wanting him back. Today, the sight of him only made me want to leave.

  Surely something had attracted me to him in the beginning. And something must have kept me there. Kept me there and brought me here.

  Something must have, but hell if I could figure out what it was.

  I looked at the clock on the dash. It was almost six, which meant I had just enough time to get home, change clothes, and head out to meet Connor and everyone else at the Pike Street Pub. I smiled. Whatever it was that had attracted me to Matt had nothing on all the things that attracted me to Connor.

  Still smiling to myself, I glanced in the rearview again and whispered, “Have a nice life, Matt.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  One of Susan and Connor’s mutual friends had a birthday tonight, so we were all meeting at the Pike Street Cub. After I’d dropped off my things from Matt’s and gotten myself ready, I took a cab from my apartment. I wasn’t planning on drinking much, but Connor was driving in straight from work, and it was a safe bet that we’d only need one vehicle when we made our escape at the end of the night.

  On my way to the pub, my sister Mary called.

  “Hey, how’s it going?” I asked.

  “Not bad, just calling to check up on you.”

  “Just what I need.”

  She laughed. “Well someone has to keep you out of trouble.”

  “You can’t do that from a thousand miles away, my dear.” I riffled through my purse for cash to pay the driver. “Especially not when I’ve got someone here to help me make trouble.”

  “Oh dear God, you’ve got another man already?” She clicked her tongue. “Danielle, you harlot.”

  “Hey now,” I said. “It’s been months. More than enough time.”

  “Okay, except that last time I talked to you, you weren’t exactly over Matthew McDumbass.”

  “That’s because I hadn’t met Connor yet.”

  “Ooh, he even has a sexy name.” She giggled.

  “You should see him in the flesh.”

  “And I’m sure you’ve seen plenty of—”

  “Mary.”

  “What? I’m just saying.”

  “Yeah, uh-huh.” The driver stopped the cab in front of the Pike Street Pub, and I handed him the money before I got out.

  “Okay, so tell me all about him,” Mary said. “At least skip the filthy bits and tell me he’s nothing like that slurping douchecock you used to call a boyfriend.”

  “Gee, why don’t you tell me how you really felt about Matt?”

  “Well, let’s see, I—”

  “That was rhetorical.”

  She huffed. “Fine. He was an asshole and we’ll leave it at that. Anyway, Connor. He’s nothing like Matt, I hope?”

  “Not even close.” I glanced up and down the street, but Connor was nowhere in sight yet.

  “So do you think this might go anywhere?” she asked. “I mean, does he have, you know, potential?”

  “Not a chance.” I smiled at my own confidence that I could so easily walk away from this.

  “What? Then why are you—” she paused. “Oh. Booty call.”

  “Exactly,” I said. “And there’s no pressure for it to go anywhere because he’s leaving in a few months.”

  “Leaving?”

  “Yeah, he’s going to California for grad school.”

  Mary laughed. “What is it with you and graduate students?”

  “No kidding.” I shook my head, laughing to myself. Part of the reason Matt had come to Seattle was to pursue his own graduate degree, something he could just as easily have done in Cheyenne. But he’d needed that whole change of scenery, so he’d packed up and moved. I sighed. “Guess I like the intellectual type with loads of student loan debt.”

  “Apparently. And maybe, unlike someone, this guy has a brain for something other than academics.”

  “Oh, he does, believe me,” I said with a grin.

  “Good God, Dan, you are shameless. So what happens if you don’t want to let this guy go?”

  “What do you mean?” I asked. “He’s moving in August. Isn’t much I can do to hold him here.”

  “Yeah, but is there any chance you’ll go with him?”

  “No, no, of course not.” I laughed, but it came out with much less enthusiasm than I expected. “It’s just a little fling. He’s fresh out of a relationship, I’m fresh out of a relationship, and I am not following another guy to another state.”

  “So, once you’ve finished having your way with Connor, what then?”

  “I find someone else to have my way with, of course.” My confidence waned a tad. I could get over him, but he’d made my dating future significantly more complicated. The sexual satisfaction bar had been raised, and I doubted that men who could satisfy like Connor Graham were easy to find.

  “Have you thought about coming back to Cheyenne after Connor leaves?” Mary asked.

  My heart sank. “I’ve thought about it, but it’s not going to happen unless I hit the lottery.” Homesickness pulled at my chest. “I want to, though. God, I miss it.”

  “Is it that expensive?” she asked. “I mean, a U-Haul or a plane ticket—”

&
nbsp; “The horses.” I shifted my weight, staring at the pavement at my feet. “I can move myself, but I can’t afford to move them.”

  “Have you thought about—”

  “I’m not selling them.”

  “Dan, if you’re miserable in Seattle, it might be worth considering.”

  I ran a hand through my hair and exhaled. “That would be like asking you to sell your children. They’re all I have. I’m not selling them.”

  “Point taken.” She sighed. “I just miss you.”

  “I know,” I said. “I miss you too. And if it weren’t for them, I’d be back by now, believe me.”

  “Still not crazy about Seattle?”

  “I like it okay.” I shrugged for no one’s benefit but my own. “It’s just not Cheyenne. Aside from the horses, I have no reason to stay here.”

  “Except Connor.”

  “Right,” I said. “Connor, who’s leaving in a few months and is just a friend with benefits.”

  “For the moment, anyway.”

  “No, this is how it’s going to stay. I mean, he’s leaving. I couldn’t get attached to him if I wanted to.”

  “Doesn’t mean you won’t.”

  “I told you, I won’t.”

  She was quiet for a second. “We’ll see about that.”

  “Mary, I’m serious. Like I said, he’s fresh out of a relationship, I’m still getting over Matthew McDumbass as you so eloquently dubbed him, and Connor’s moving away anyway.”

  “Sure you won’t want to go with him?”

  “Absolutely. I’ve already done that with one guy, and I’m not doing it again.”

  “Okay, I’ll take your word for it. Her tone was laced with skepticism. “Well, either way, I’m glad to hear you’re with someone who’s not a complete asshole.”

  “Yeah, me too.”

  Footsteps behind me turned my head. Connor and I made eye contact and my stomach fluttered when he smiled.

  To Mary, I said, “He’s here, I have to go.”