No matter how hard he tries, he’s never been able to keep his feelings from me. Something always slips through his careful façade, but not this time. He hasn’t looked back. Didn’t even wait for me to catch up with him before he took off toward our room. My heart races as the door slides open and I stare at it a second before charging in.
Screw it. Let’s get this over with.
“Listen. I know you’re probably pissed, but—”
The air leaves my lungs as Ren shoots toward me and lifts me off my feet in one silent move. Tiny ripples of pain snake across my scalp as the back of my head smacks into the wall and Ren pins me in place. The brief moment of shock and panic quickly turn into need, and damn, I know we should be having a conversation, but he’s gripping my ass and nipping at my neck the way I love.
“You defy me…” Fabric rips and fire explodes inside me as Ren frees his cock, plunging in with one hurried thrust. The heat between us swells as he grunts, fiercely pumping into me over and over with a barely controlled desire. He slows his pace and leans back to open my shirt and bare my breasts. Hot and wet, his tongue slides down my neck, then lower, circling the peak of my nipple.
Ren’s eyes find mine just as his teeth scrape across the tender nub. “You disregard my warnings and choose to alter our most sacred of laws.”
“Ugh,” I groan, bucking my hips, just wanting him to let it go for a moment so I can enjoy that glorious dick. “Shut—”
Ren slides two fingers in my mouth, silencing me. Quickly replacing them with his tongue, he punishes my lips with hard, demanding kisses until I gasp for breath. He slides his hand up my back, bringing us impossibly close. “You are unapologetic.” My breath catches as he thrusts slow and deep. “Unwavering…” Another deep thrust and I’m so close to coming, I grip his ass trying to force him deeper. “And undeniably mine.” Pure ecstasy cascades down the bond, lighting me up like the Mageran night sky, and I scream, coming so hard I collapse against Ren, completely useless.
“I should…piss you…off more…often,” I pant, and Ren captures my mouth again in a quick kiss.
“You should have told me. Your choices do not come without repercussions.”
The seriousness of his tone sobers my post-orgasm high. “What do you mean?”
Withdrawing and swinging my legs up into his arms, Ren carries me to the bed. The animal hides make my already sweat-drenched shirt hotter. “By altering our law, you have taken responsibility for them. As much as it irritates me you chose to do so without my consent, I am not the type of male to ask permission. I would expect no less from my female.”
“But I was always their queen, or whatever, right? Why is this any different?”
Ren drags a finger down my cleavage. “No longer are you sheltered under my position. You stand out on your own, in your own right as their leader. Females traditionally lead in an informal capacity. Keepers carry out most of the work. You now can be held accountable for the actions of those under you, as am I. Fear not, my Aciana. Like your ethereal beauty, your ability to constantly challenge us is unending. There will be push back. But as always, our people will adapt. Or choose not to, to their own detriment.”
A shift in the air sends a chill across my skin, and Ren grabs the animal hides to cover me, but then stops. His eyes glaze over for a split second, then a mischievous smile spreads across his face. It’s the closest to pure delight I’ve seen outside of the bedroom or battle.
“What? What is it? What did you see?” I ask, cupping the side of his face. He’s beautiful, and with all we have going on, for him to look at me like this must mean…
Leaping on me and splitting my thighs, Ren dips down between them. I yelp, tensing a moment before I relax back onto the bed “Ah! What are you doing? What’s going on?”
Ren flicks his tongue out, tasting me, and once again gives me a heart-stopping grin. “Rivan and Sol have heard from their source. A male has requested to disappear.”
I buck my hips, scooting closer to Ren’s hovering mouth. “Why do I care?”
“The male in question is employed by the Universal Community, and his identification number matches that of a pilot in charge of a ship that delivers near one of our suspected locations.” The heat of his breath on my glistening skin tingles in the most delicious way. “This calls for a celebration, my Aciana. And I am going to feast on you until you cannot bear to be devoured any longer.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Ren
The sweet burn of pain greets me as I skim my thumb along my blade, gauging its edge. Too dull. The impact of a knife should be painless at first—the killing end crafted to such a fine angle, that when slid deep enough it can sever a foe’s soul. With my mate sleeping soundly in our bed, perfecting my weapons and envisioning what I will do with them is the only suitable way to pass the time.
Sol has arranged the meeting. The unsuspecting male will arrive for supply retrieval ahead of his scheduled time, and I will be waiting.
Drawn to the sound of anxious tapping, I lift my gaze. Sol. He is sifting through the logs again, ensuring the freighter we suspect is delivering goods to the colonel’s location will be on time. We will intercept the male before his next scheduled payload. There is no room for miscalculation.
“Center yourself, Sol. I have grown tired of your fidgeting.”
He swipes a hand across his brow, then leans back in his chair. “I cannot help it.” He looks around, searching for additional males, to find only he and I remain in the navigation bay. All others have turned in for sleep. “I have limited information. Only whispers and hints of what to expect. There is very little chatter, Acia. But what I have found is worrisome. The security measures rumored to be on these types of stations are…” He sighs, then leans forward. “I will have to accompany you. To ensure you and the other males are able to navigate through. I will not be able to remain here on the ship.”
Irritation spikes, and I narrow my eyes. “Are you not a male worthy of being named Illusian?”
He fidgets with the tablet in front of him and the stench of fear rises. “Yes. But I have never engaged in combat. I have trained, but I much prefer to remain where my skills are best utilized.”
He is afraid. And his weakness is irritating. But what he lacks in traditional skill, he makes up for in technological pursuits. “You have been given a wide berth to contribute in your own way. But it does not change who and what you are. You will join us. And if necessary, you will fight.”
Sol swallows hard, lowering his head a fraction to acknowledge my command. “Yes. Acia.”
Like a child, he behaves as if he is forced to indulge in war games when, for most, nothing is desired more. His assistance in locating our enemies has been invaluable. It is his distaste for violence that has painted him as inferior.
“Enough. You will accept the chance to find respect amongst the other males. Now, report your current findings.”
“The pilot is scheduled to dock on Terra X half an Earth day before leaving to enter through the restricted zone. If he is indeed a member of the crew that reports to the colonel’s suspected location, we will only have a short window to commandeer the ship before it needs to leave for delivery. There are no confirmed drop offs, but it is the only vessel that has been spotted passing through the territory regularly, and the only one that orders supplies in such large quantities.”
“Is the vessel armed?”
“To my knowledge, no more than a personal use freighter. Basic defenses, but it is slow and bulky. Designed for function rather than speed.”
“Then we remain on course. In less than two Earth days’ time, we will intercept the male, question him, then hijack his vessel and use it to gain access to whatever facility the Universal Community has hidden. Start gathering all data the other factions have compiled on their assigned locations. I want to ensure we are not wasting time.”
Sol nods, worry staining his features. Despite my frustration with his indifference and marked lack
of attention to detail following our customs, I consider the male integral to our process. He has developed. Thickened his skin and dedicated himself to proficiency in what he deems comfortable. He should revel in an opportunity to prove his place.
His hunched shoulders relax as I smack him on the back. It is an odd gesture. But I have seen males of other species engage in the action, and it appears to instill some sort of brotherhood. “Now is the time for you to demonstrate your strengths. You have allowed the other males to underestimate you for far too long. Earn your respect, and no one can take it from you.”
He does not answer, only straightens. Perhaps, he will make an Illusian Warrior after all.
Jayla
Most mornings I get up, stumble out of our room for coffee, and settle in the navigation bay. I hadn’t noticed before, but I miss the rising sun and the feel of its rays on my face. And even though I know we’re moving so fast there’s only a slim chance in hell of making out something as it whizzes by, I still stare out the nav window in search of some semblance of normalcy. It usually only takes half a cup of coffee for me to come to my senses and realize normal doesn’t exist. Neither did the façade UCom built to hide all their dirty dealings.
The universe is a filthy, vile, unforgiving place, full of pain and sorrow. The sun may not rise and set the same for me now, but at least the ugliness I see is honest. It’s real. And that’s more than I can say about anything in my life before.
“Damn, I miss coffee,” Leandra says, nearly scaring me half to death. Well, if I wasn’t awake before…
Dabbing away at the few drops that hit my shirt, I hold out my cup to her. She grimaces, waving her hands. “No way. The last time I tried to drink coffee didn’t end well. It’s been two hours since I’ve puked last, and this is a record for me. Don’t screw it up.”
Still pale, but no longer an icky gray color, Leandra looks marginally better. Her hair is pulled up in her classic messy bun, and she’s wearing her favorite pair of sweats. My stomach turns at how easily they hang off of her now. She’s losing way too much weight.
“When’s the last time you ate? No offense, but you look half-starved.”
The muscles of her neck cord and flex as she stretches them then pulls her knees to her chest in the seat beside me. “Yeah. But I have to be careful. This baby apparently hates everything but meat. Ugh, baby. It still sounds so weird.” Her voice is muffled as she rests her face on her knees.
“You doing okay with it all? I mean it’s a pretty big deal. And you’ve been so sick…”
She inhales, then turns. The bags under her eyes speak to her exhaustion, and what she’s been going through is nothing short of torture. I wouldn’t blame her for being scared. Hell, I’m terrified for her. She still doesn’t know about the whole Illusian babies can rip you apart from the inside part, and I’m sure as shit not going to mention it.
“At first, I freaked. We’re stuck in this continuous cycle of, oh, shit we’re going to die, and the Ragar-thing happened so fast…it’s a lot, you know? Then to find out I’m going to have a baby. Like there is a real live thing growing inside me—”
I snort. “Or things…”
Her mouth drops open. “Seriously, shut up. But no, it’s just a lot to get used to. On my worst night, when I felt so horrible I thought I was dying, I had a moment where I got sad. Not because I wasn’t ready to die. I was seriously so fucking sick I was kind of resigned to it. I got emotional because I’d never get to meet it. And that’s when I knew.”
“Knew what? That you’re a giant ass bag of hormones now?”
She punches my shoulder, and I try to ignore the fact it’s noticeably weaker than before.
“No. I just knew that I had to do this, see it through, and get better. It deserves a life, ya know? And I’m the only one that can make that happen.” Her eyes glisten slightly, and she yawns.
“Why are you even up?” I ask. She looks like she hasn’t slept in weeks.
Leandra sighs, lifting her head to peer back at the nav bay door. “I told Ragar I needed to pee. But I really just wanted to see you. I’m pissed I can’t go with you guys when you leave. Especially with everything that’s going on. I really want to be there for you.”
I squeeze her shoulder then bring her in for a hug. “Listen, I’ll be fine. You just worry about convincing Ragar to go.”
“He’ll go. Or I’ll hobble my ass on over to that ship and force him to.” Laughter bubbles up in my throat at the idea of her dragging her feet and her barf bag all the way down the ship’s ramp to force him out. She’d do it too. This little baby’s lucky. Leandra’s so stubborn, she’s the type to survive the unthinkable just to prove a point.
The sound of her chuckle lightens my mood, and I hug her one more time. When we first met we were easy friends, but now she feels more like family, and I couldn’t imagine going through this without her.
“You need to go back to bed. Or else, Ragar will come and carry you there.”
Leandra groans and rolls her eyes. “I know. I love him, but damn, he can be annoying sometimes…” Her lips flatten. “How long until we’ve reached the place where the supply ship’s supposed to dock?”
“A little less than a day and a half.”
“You promise to come get me before you leave?”
I furrow my brow, confused at the sudden seriousness in her tone. This baby has her all messed up. “Of course, why wouldn’t I?”
She shakes her head, giving me a tight smile. “Nothing. I just don’t want you to leave without saying goodbye.”
“Girl. Go to sleep. You’re over here getting misty eyed, and nothing’s going to happen. We’ll be fine. After all we’ve been through, you think we can’t handle this? We’re going to end this crap once and for all. Then finally find somewhere to rest where none of us have to deal with this shit anymore.”
A shadow draws my attention to the door. Ragar. Arms crossed in a way that definitely reads “unamused.”
Not even bothering to look back, Leandra sighs. “Back to bed, I guess. Come see me in a little bit, okay?”
Her joints creak as she rises from the chair, and Ragar’s at her side in a breath to help her hobble back to their room. She doesn’t get fifteen steps before he lifts her into his arms, and I can’t help but smirk at her annoyed sigh. It’s nice to see her actually accepting his help for once after giving him so much hell.
Sucking down the last sip of coffee, I force myself into the kitchen for another cup. With little to do but wait until we reach this mystery location, I convinced Naya to do another in depth training session with the females who want to join, and it starts in less than an hour. The first one was really helpful, and I’m bummed I didn’t get to participate. I guess their whole superior DNA thing applies to battle skills as well because they picked up some great moves super quick. Naya has already advanced Dreya and Amina to weapons, and I’m still at the punching without breaking my thumb part.
Resetting the brew button on the dispenser so that it replenishes itself, I scramble to find some sugar. I know we’ve been low, but I could have sworn we had a few pods left. Suddenly, remembering I forgot to add it to our supply list for Sol’s next run, I pad back into the nav bay in search of his tablet.
Ah. There it is. Piled under two of his other machines.
Picturing Ren’s face if he were to see the mess makes me smile. Sol’s disorganization drives him nuts. He’d never admit it, but the unusual Illusian has grown on him. I can tell.
A faint static pours through the speakers. With the volume turned down, it’s almost impossible to hear. Not knowing how to adjust it or what to do, I poke my head out to grab Rivan from where he sits in the common room, playing with Rhia and Ajay.
I address Rhia out of respect. “Hey, can you ask Rivan to come in here. The comms are going off, and I can’t understand them.”
In less time than it takes me to blink, Rivan is at the comms, flipping buttons and turning gauges. There’s always a warrior o
n duty in the nav bay, but they’re allowed to venture out as long as they’re close. The early morning hours are when Rhia and he get the most time together.
Rather than turn up the volume and risk waking the few Illusians who prefer to sleep with their doors open, he inserts a tiny speaker in his ear and takes his place behind the ship’s controls. I turn with every intention of finding Naya and helping her get ready for the training session but stop as Rivan jumps up and begins searching through constellations on the star map. My heart sinks as he turns to me. “Call the Acia.”
Shit. This can’t be good. He never addresses me directly.
I take off for our room. The booming sound of Ren’s footfalls echoes down the hall before I can even turn the corner. The one day I convince him to sleep in, beg him to rest before whatever disaster we’re going to face next, and he’s woken up in a panic. I swear he’s never going to listen to me again.
My fingers snag in his as he passes, and I scurry after him. A barely controlled fury pours down our bond. “What’s going on? Rivan hasn’t told me yet.”
“Another group of Illusians has been hit—Elias has fallen.”
The sound of my heartbeat pulses in my ears. “What! What do you mean he’s ‘fallen’?”
“He died attempting to save his child. The Inokine have made another attempt to obtain our young.” Ren squeezes my hand. “We have lost both of them.”
I stop, unable to process what he just said. Rather than comfort me or explain further, Ren throws me over his shoulder and continues toward Rivan.
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