In her sweet, didn’t-want-to-hurt-my-feelings kind of way.
So, I’m going house hunting, and I’m going to guilt Teagan into coming along so I can force her to spend time with me.
This is what my life has become.
I push open the door to the store and I hear her voice from the back. “Just look around and I’ll be with you shortly!”
That’s not going to work for me. I head to the area where I think her voice came from. This store was always like a maze but it’s gotten worse. Furniture is used as a way to make aisles, and there’s no rhyme or reason to the merchandise piled all around. Lamps sit on top of the chairs and there are paintings on the floor but plates hung on the walls. I used to hate coming here to meet her. I swore there was a dead body in one of the chests that she couldn’t get open.
God help whoever bought that.
“Tea?”
“Derek?” she calls out with a hint of panic. “What are you doing here?”
I smile to myself. “Shopping.”
“Here?” A laugh fills the air. “Not likely.”
“What are you doing?”
“Just looking at something.”
I lean over but I can’t see anything but the top of her head behind a table and chairs. “Okay. I have to talk to you, could you stand up?”
“I’m good, go ahead and talk…”
It would make things a little easier if she would look at me. “I can wait.”
“Really, it’s fine. What’s up?”
“It’s more of a question…”
“Yes?”
This is ridiculous. “Teagan, I’m talking to the top of a table, please get up.”
She groans. “I’d rather not.”
“Why?”
“Because. That’s why.”
“Really, Tea?” I squat down, ready to battle her and let her know she’s out of her mind, but when I see her, I almost fall to the floor laughing. Teagan has managed to get her hair stuck to the underside of the table. “Because why again?”
“I hate you. You had to look?”
“Of course I did.”
“This is mortifying.”
“How, pray tell, did you manage to do this?”
She glares at me. “I was checking something written under here and then somehow I turned and my hair got stuck. Can you help me?”
I ponder that for a minute. Right now, she’s literally trapped. She can’t run, unless she wants to be scalped, and would need to hear me out.
“Of course.”
She releases a sigh of relief. “Thank you.”
“After we talk.”
“Derek.” Teagan’s voice is low.
“Teagan.”
“You’re going to help me once you get what you want?”
I shrug. “No, you don’t have to agree to what I want, but you have to listen.”
“When I get out of this,” she warns, “I’m going to kill you.”
“All the more reason to keep you trapped.” That was definitely the wrong thing to say. I’m pretty sure she’s ready to lose her hair at this point. I better make it quick. “My point is, I need your help, if you’re not homicidal by the end of this.”
“Help with what?”
“I need to move out of my parents’ house and I’m supposed to meet the Realtor in an hour. I was hoping you could come.”
Her eyes narrow a bit. “That’s what you wanted to talk about?”
“Yeah.”
“Not…”
“Not what? Is there something else you’d like to discuss?”
Like the kiss that has kept me up every night. The way her lips felt with mine. How long I’ve wondered what it would be like and now it’s all I can think about.
“No. House hunting sounds fine—great even. So, you want me to go look for a place for you and Everly?”
“Yeah.”
“But regardless of my answer, you’ll release me?”
Like I’d leave her here? How the hell would that go over in terms of ever seeing if that one kiss was a fluke or real? It wouldn’t. And I have to know.
“Well, that depends, now, doesn’t it?”
“On?”
“On your answer.” I smile, and she groans.
I didn’t say I wouldn’t have fun with it, though.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Teagan
Seventeen years old
“This is a hammer,” Derek says with a smirk.
“I know what a hammer is.”
“Well, I don’t know what you know. Do you know how to use it?”
I know I’d like to hit him in the head with it, but that would probably be frowned upon when you’re working on rebuilding a barn that was burned down.
“Yes. I do.”
Derek challenged me to do something for someone else without anything to gain. I know Mr. Mitchell needs his barn back after the storm took part of it down so he can care for the horses he helps, which is why we’re here. I called all the football guys and organized the whole thing.
There are about twenty kids, but the best part was that when the town caught wind of what we were planning, the adults lined up to help as well. Then, Mr. Harvey donated lumber and others helped out financially.
I can’t explain the joy I feel inside knowing we may actually build this thing today.
It was nothing compared to the look on Mr. Mitchell’s face, though. He had tears in his eyes and kept shaking his head in disbelief.
“Okay, killer, let’s see what you’ve got.” Derek takes two steps back with hands raised.
I really question our friendship some days.
I take the nail, lining it up, and pull the hammer back. Please don’t let me hit my finger.
“Today, Tea.”
I turn and stick my tongue out at him before going back and hitting the nail.
Well, attempting to, because instead of it going into the wood frame, it falls to the floor.
“Crap.”
He laughs. “You have to hold it until you hit it. The nail doesn’t stay there because it knows it’s about to get hammered.”
“I knew that.”
He raises one brow. “Really?”
“Yes, really. I didn’t want to hit my finger.”
Derek takes the nail between his finger and thumb. “Then worry about hitting mine.”
My eyes widen because there’s no way I’m going to hammer his hand. It was bad enough worrying about hurting myself. “You’re nuts.”
“No, I trust you.”
Now he’s really crazy.
Our friendship has saved me in so many ways. I don’t worry anymore about Kelly and Lori, who have told me that my being friends with the animal-whispering nerd has officially left me out of the cool crowd. I told them that was perfectly fine with me and then reminded them that all of us have secrets.
I am not weak. I’m strong and have power as well.
Derek gave me that back.
Not by doing anything magical either, just by being my friend. While he may trust me, I’m not about to smash his finger.
I drop the hammer to my side. “I trust you too, but I don’t trust myself with blunt objects.”
“It’s not going to nail itself, Tea. If you don’t do it, I’ll be forced to stand here all day.”
He leans against the wood just to prove his point.
“Stop being an idiot.”
“Stop being a chicken.”
“Fine,” I huff. “You asked for it. When your finger needs to be amputated and you can’t work with animals, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
He rolls his eyes. “Don’t hit my finger and we won’t have that problem.”
“And will you forgive me if I hit you?”
“Depends.”
“On?”
Derek’s smile grows. “On whether you hit it or not.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Teagan
Present
My father has always gr
iped about shopping with my mother and I never understood why. She’s never in a hurry, she likes to window-shop a lot, and overall, she’s just relaxed. Dad isn’t that way. He likes to get the task done so he can move onto what he really wants to do—like fishing or football.
House shopping with Derek has given me a whole new understanding for my father’s pain.
First, the agent that is driving us around is an idiot. She’s gotten lost twice, and this town is not that big. Then, Derek’s being the most ridiculous person ever. Each freaking house he finds something else, something that doesn’t even matter, as a reason to move on to seeing the next listing.
“What was wrong with that one?” I ask as we leave the fifth showing.
“Too…beachy.”
The agent clears her throat. “I can find something less beachy if you’d like.”
“Thank you.” He grins as though he’s won a prize.
“We live on an island! The whole damn thing is a beach.”
“Yeah.” He sighs. “But it was old beachy.”
I didn’t know there was such a thing. “So you want more of a new beach feel?”
“I want it to feel like home.”
“It won’t be a home if you never pick it.”
He chuckles once but covers it with a cough.
“We have four more homes lined up that we can look at,” the agent informs us.
“Great. Teagan and I are ready for more.”
Yeah, so ready…
I groan. “I should’ve cut my hair off when I was under that table.”
“But then we wouldn’t have this fun day together.” The first house we’d looked at was perfect. It was a few blocks off the beach but had amazing views. There were some upgrades he could do that would’ve been simple enough. I couldn’t believe how spacious it felt considering the square footage. I would’ve bought it, but he walked out after three minutes.
“Oh.” I laugh without humor. “This is fun?”
“I’m enjoying myself.”
“I’m glad one of us is,” I mutter to myself.
Each house we visit, I try to picture Derek and Everly, and then, somewhere about five minutes into the vision, I show up with groceries or a painting in my hands. Then, Chastity comes out of the front door, smiling with that humongous pregnant cat of hers, and we’re all happy. As though I’m not looking for a house for him, but for us—which I’m not.
It’s a dumb fantasy that keeps coming back.
“I’m begging you to just let me walk home.”
“Here, look at this one.” He ignores the comment and takes the listing paperwork the agent handed him from the front seat. Of course, I’m stuck back here with him because her office is literally her passenger seat.
Derek shakes his head. “Let’s see this one next. Teagan is getting hungry and it’s close to the store. We’ll get you a Snickers since you’re clearly in a mood.”
I wonder why that could be.
“You better get two.”
“Only if you’re nice.”
“Then I guess I’ll be hungry,” I retort. I lost the ability to be nice three houses ago.
We pull up to a brick home, and he won’t even get out of the car. “I don’t like it.”
I might kill him. “You haven’t even seen it yet!”
He shrugs. “I don’t want to see it.”
“I think you’re trying to torture me. I think this is all some ruse so that you can drive me crazy or force me to hang out with you.”
“Is it working?”
I glare at him.
“I’ll take that as a yes. So, if it is a ruse, I’m winning. If we’re looking for a house, which I assure you, we are, I’m still winning. Honestly, today is perfect.”
Instead of responding, I bang my head on the seat in front of me. This is my version of hell. I’m trapped in a car with a man I still have feelings for, looking at houses, and imagining myself in the house with him.
We drive to the other side where the tourists really never go. It’s definitely the location I would prefer to live in. I like the privacy this section of the island offers. It’s not about the wild horses or how big of a house you can build.
It’s true beach homes.
What people could afford to build and where they could live a comfortable life.
“So, about that kiss…”
My head shoots to his to find him sitting there with a smirk.
“Now is not the time,” I say quietly.
“Why not? I’m sure you’ve been nuking it in your head for over a week now. I think the car, where you can’t escape, is the perfect time.”
Oh my god. I’m seriously debating throwing myself from a moving vehicle to avoid this. “Seriously, not now.”
We don’t know this agent and who she might gossip to in town. And anyway, we were doing just fine pretending nothing ever happened.
“Well, if you don’t want to talk, that’s fine.”
I breathe a sigh of relief. At least he’s being reasonable.
Talking about that kiss is bad. Talking about it makes it real and I’m just fine letting it be a dream. He has no idea what dating when you have a kid is like and I’m not ready to be hurt again.
“I’ll talk.” Oh, for the love of God. “I liked that kiss. In fact, I’ve thought about it a lot and I think you liked that kiss.”
“I’d like you to stop saying kiss,” I say between gritted teeth.
“Which leads me to wonder why you liked the kiss so much and why you stopped the kiss.”
There’s something wrong with me, that’s why. It’s the only thing I can come up with. He was married, had a kid, I had a kid, and our lives—and we—are nothing like we were before. We’ve grown up, we aren’t the same starry-eyed kids with big hopes and dreams. We’re both battle worn, tired, and have responsibilities that come first. I can’t jump into a relationship—or go around kissing him—when I don’t trust my heart not to make more of things. That’s why I stopped it. None of that is going to come out of my mouth, though.
“I’m wondering if I could survive a quick exit.”
“If you liked it and I liked it, what could that mean?”
“That you’re trying to make me crazy?” I suggest.
“It means that we should kiss again.”
That stops me. “I’m sorry, what?”
“You should kiss me again.” Derek watches me, his eyes showing no signs of humor.
“You’re kidding me.”
“Do I look like I’m kidding?”
No, he doesn’t. He’s dead serious. He thinks we should kiss again and that now is the appropriate time to bring it up. Do I want to kiss him again? Yes. Yes, I do. Do I think it’s a good idea? Not at all.
His daughter is still reeling from her mother’s death. We don’t know each other as adults, well, not really. I’m not in a financial or emotional state for a relationship, and our kids hate each other. It’s not…it’s just not the right time for us.
I’d do well to remember that and shut this down.
“You should be. You should be joking about this instead of looking at my mouth like that.” I glance out the window, avoiding all eye contact, as we make a right onto Sycamore Street.
When I turn back to him, the heat in his eyes causes my heart to sputter. His gaze caresses my face and then is back on my lips.
“Like I want you too? Like I think about it all the time? Like it’s been a long time coming? Or like it never happened and we pretend there’s nothing we’re both feeling?”
My throat is tight, but I manage to rasp the words out. “Yes. Like that.”
Derek grins. “Well, I asked a series of questions and I’m happy to pick which one I’d like that answer to go with.”
Before I can respond, the Realtor clears her throat and the discomfort in her voice would be comical if Derek hadn’t just made me half crazy. “Here we are.”
“Thank God,” I say and get out of the car as quickly as I ca
n. Then I realize we’re on Destiny Lane. How fitting? The one street in this town named after something other than trees, nature, or numbers.
I walk up to the front, ready to be done with this day, when I come to a full stop. I can’t move. I can’t think because I’m staring at the most perfect house. I don’t know if it’s the house or the conversation we had that has me so unsettled, but that’s the weird part, I’m not unsettled, I’m grounded.
All I keep thinking is…this is the house.
This is where I would live. This is a home.
I stand here, my eyes taking in the two-story home with the coziest front porch. It’s a light blue color with thick siding that makes the house look a little bigger. There’s an addition to the right that’s completely made of windows, and a two-car garage off the driveway with more than enough room for a proper workshop or Chastity to experiment with her weird science stuff. It’s…perfect.
I don’t even need to look inside because no matter what condition it is in, I would fix it. It’s the home I’ve dreamed of without even knowing.
I can see myself in that sunroom, painting while looking out at the oak tree that’s swaying in the slight breeze. Chastity would sit on the porch, reading a book or even on that tree swing while she daydreams.
Derek stands next to me, both of us looking straight ahead.
“This is the house,” he says.
My eyes snap to his. “What?”
“This is it. It’s the one. I’m going to buy it.”
No, this is my house. This is the house I need to live in. I need to talk him out of it and then sell my body to be able to buy it. “But you haven’t even gone inside.”
He turns to me. “I don’t need to.”
“Derek. Be rational! You can’t know this is the house and that this wouldn’t cost you a fortune to fix. You can’t live here.”
“Why not?”
Because I’m going to someday.
I feel like he’s pulling my heart from my chest. How can this house be causing me so much discomfort? It’s a house. It’s just a fucking house.
But it’s more.
“Because.” That’s all I can get out.
He turns to the Realtor. “This is the house. I’d like to make an offer.”
All I Ask Page 15
