“But you didn’t,” Janna spat. “Instead you abandoned me in foster care and then gave me away!”
“Janna.” Austin placed his arm around her waist as her voice rose.
“If that wasn’t a clue that you wanted nothing to do with me, changing your name nailed it home.”
“Okay, that’s enough,” Austin said quietly near her ear and tried steering her away from Phoenix.
“You’re right, that is enough,” Janna said of Austin’s comment. She returned her attention to Phoenix. “Just stay away from me.”
Janna allowed Austin to guide her through the VIP section and to the stairs. She fought the strong urge to hide her face, sure those nearby had heard the conversation. She had been trying so hard to change her image. Trying to show the world that she was more than a pretty face, but also a woman who had a good head on her shoulders and could make a difference in the world. Yet, those few minutes might have wiped out any progress she had made.
Austin dropped his arm from around her waist and reached for her hand, carefully guiding her down the stairs. Once they reached the bottom step, he pulled out his cell and called for their car. Janna just wanted to go home and not show her face for at least a month, but that wasn’t possible.
Once they reached the lower level, no one paid them any attention as Austin shouldered through the dancing crowd. The music, excruciatingly loud, did nothing to drown out the thoughts roaring through her mind. Thoughts about how she had just told the woman who had given birth to her that she was as good as dead to her. Thoughts that she had caused a scene that was sure to end up on someone’s front page. And thoughts that brought a rush of tears to her eyes.
Just hold it together. Just hold it together, she chanted in her mind. She held her head back, blinking rapidly, knowing that if one tear fell, others were sure to follow.
Austin didn’t stop moving until they were outside. People were still arriving and fans were hanging out, hoping to see their favorite stars. Austin hurried her off to the side where their car had dropped them and waited.
She glanced up at him and he didn’t say a word. Instead he opened his arms to her. Unable to hold back any longer, she buried her face in his chest and sobbed.
* * *
“How do you feel?” Austin asked when he removed the empty mug from her hand and set it on the bedside table. They had returned to Janna’s place an hour ago, but she still looked as if she’d just lost her best friend.
“I feel okay,” she mumbled and scooted farther down into the bed. Austin sat next to her and gently pushed a few loose strands of hair away from her forehead.
“You don’t sound okay.”
Silence. He sighed and leaned forward, his elbows on his thighs. Austin didn’t know what to say to make her feel better. There were so many things he wanted to ask regarding the announcement that Phoenix Hudson was her mother. The Phoenix Hudson. That was like having Denzel Washington as his father. The thought of that would be mind-blowing. He couldn’t believe Janna had never told him.
“I’m sorry,” she sobbed, wiping feverishly at the tears on her cheeks. “I’m so sorry you had to witness that. I just hate...”
“You just hate what, sweetheart?” He rubbed his hand over her back in small circles, hoping to provide some comfort.
“I just hate the way you had to find out who my birth mother is...and I hate the way I spoke to her.”
Austin had to admit he almost didn’t recognize Janna tonight. Her tone, her mean words and even her demeanor were so uncharacteristic of the woman he knew. The woman he had fallen in love with all over again. He couldn’t pretend to understand how it felt, knowing that your mother gave you up to pursue her career. He only hoped he could somehow help her move past the hurt.
“I’m sick of being in the media in an unfavorable manner. I don’t even want to think about what’s going to show up in a rag magazine this week,” she groaned and flipped on to her back, the sheet barely covering her breasts.
Austin mentally chastised himself for even noticing where the sheet fell. All evening he had imagined peeling that skimpy dress off her and indulging in all the freaky positions his mind had fantasized about.
“Do you think she was there to stir up drama?” Janna asked. “To get attention? She does have a new movie coming out.”
“I don’t know, but honestly, I don’t think so. She genuinely looked like a mother who was desperate to talk to her child.”
“She’s not my mother!” Janna spat out. “She left me for her career. Tossed me away as if I meant nothing to her. I just don’t understand that. I don’t understand how a mother can do that. Mama Adel would never do anything like that...no matter what Hollywood was offering.”
Austin didn’t want to bring up the fact that Janna had done the same thing to him. Tossed his love away like a bag of trash in pursuit of a career. Granted, it wasn’t the same, seeing that he and Janna had been just kids. But still.
Austin leaned over and placed a kiss against her lips.
“Why don’t you try and get some sleep?”
“Aren’t you coming to bed?”
“Yes.”
Austin kicked off his shoes and pulled the tail of his shirt out of his pants. He quickly undid the buttons and started on his belt when Janna spoke again.
“Can you go a little slower? I want to watch.”
Austin shook his head and laughed, glad her sense of humor was still intact. The situation with her birth mother wasn’t over, but they would get through it. Together they could get through anything.
* * *
The next morning Janna cracked open her eyes and stretched her arms wide, accidently bumping a sleeping Austin. A smile tipped the corner of her lips and she turned onto her side to face his body. He’d done an incredible job taking her mind off the situation with Phoenix. Going to sleep and waking up with him by her side was something she wanted to do every day. She had no idea what their future held, but she’d give anything to spend the rest of her life with him.
Lying on his stomach, Austin had his head buried in the pillow and his thick arms hugging it. Janna could watch him all day. She rose up on her elbow and ran her hand slowly over his back. With smooth skin the color of toasted almonds, his broad back and muscular arms were only a few of his physical attributes that she loved.
Her hand moved to his lower back, where the sheet rested over his firm butt. She knew he worked out three times a week, but he had a body that looked as if he put in hundreds of hours at the gym. Her hands went lower, but the intrusive sound of her cell phone interrupted her mini-excursion and broke the silence in the room. Austin groaned next to her and snuggled farther under the covers.
Part of Janna wanted to ignore the phone, but in light of what happened the night before, she thought it best to at least see who was calling.
She hurried across the room to answer it.
“Hello,” she whispered hoarsely, seeing that it was Nelson. Who else would call her at six in the morning? By this time, he was probably on his second cup of coffee and had been at the office for an hour.
She grabbed the silk robe draped over a chair in her sitting area and hurried out of the bedroom, closing the door behind her.
“Janna, what the heck happened last night? Is it true that Phoenix Hudson is your mother? Tell me it isn’t true and that I’m not being blindsided by the top news of the century!” he yelled.
She could picture him pacing feverishly in front of his desk, running his fingers through his hair. She really should’ve given him a heads-up last night, but by the time she arrived home, the last thing she’d wanted to do was talk to anyone who wasn’t Austin.
“It’s true that she’s my birth mother. Not my mother.”
Silence filled the phone line and again Janna could picture Nelson’s reaction. No doub
t he had dropped down in his desk chair, his eyes closed and his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose.
“No. No. No. This is not happening. How could you not tell me something like this? I’ve known you for ten years. How the hell has this not come up? You’ve had plenty of times to say, ‘Hey, Nelson, by the way, my mother is Phoenix frickin’ Hudson!’ Oh my God, Janna! Are you kiddin’ me?” he roared.
She didn’t bother responding, knowing he wasn’t done with his rant, but once she thought he was done, she filled him in on the details.
“I should have known. I...should...have...known. You’re both drop-dead gorgeous with perfect cheekbones and bodies that would make a gay man drool. I should have seen the resemblance. I can’t—”
“Nelson. Nelson!” Janna had enough. It was too early in the morning for this. “Nelson?”
“What?”
“Did you call me for any other reason? Because if not, I think we can have this conversation later. Like, say, after twelve noon.”
“Come on, Janna! We have to pull everyone together for damage control and figure out how to spin this crazy, awesome development. Do you know what this is going to do for your career?”
“Okay, that’s it. Goodbye, Nelson. I don’t feel up to talking about this right now.” She hung up, not giving him a chance to debate. It figured he’d be excited by the news.
“Is everything okay?” Austin asked, standing at the entrance into the living, his sleep-filled voice sending delicious shivers through her body. Wearing only a pair of blue silk pajama bottoms, he looked hotter than a soldering iron in an oven.
“Yeah, everything is fine, baby. That was Nelson. I didn’t get a chance to ask him how he found out, but apparently news has broken about me and Phoenix.”
“Sweetheart, I’m sorry.” Austin strolled across the room and sat on the sofa next to her, pulling her into his arms. He placed a kiss against her temple and laid his head back, clearly not fully awake.
Janna loved how peace consumed her whenever she was in his arms. With him, it felt as if all was well in the world. But she knew otherwise. The shit had hit the fan and it hadn’t even been twenty-four hours yet. She didn’t dare turn on the television. At any minute, Mama Adel and her sisters would be...
She didn’t get a chance to finish the thought before her cell and landline started ringing.
“I think I’m going to scream...or cry,” she groaned against Austin’s chest.
The phones eventually stopped ringing, only to start again.
“If you’re not going to answer those, can we go back to bed?”
“If I don’t answer, everyone is just going to keep calling.”
“In that case...” Austin leaned forward and dropped his arm from around her. He lifted her cell from the table and silenced it before stumbling across the room to the house phone. He picked up the cordless and pushed a few buttons before setting it back down.
Surprised by his actions, Janna just sat staring at him, appreciating how he was taking charge.
He extended his hand to her. “Come on. Let’s go back to bed. You can talk to everyone when you’re ready, but right now I’m going to take advantage of having you all to myself.”
Chapter 13
“Mama, I don’t know what to do,” Janna said to Mama Adel. Whenever she didn’t want to get advice from her sisters, she could always call her mother. They could talk about anything without her passing judgment. “Last night, I lost it when I saw her, and then when she blurted out that she was my mother I snapped.”
Mama Adel was quiet for a long moment before speaking. “Janna, there’s something I need to tell you. Though I promised Phoenix I’d never share this, I think there’s something you should know about her.”
Janna stopped pacing and dropped down in the nearest chair. Somehow she knew her mother was going to say something she didn’t want to hear.
“Phoenix and I have been keeping in touch since you were five years old. When you were my foster child, the system didn’t allow it, but I knew she was sincere about making sure you were well taken care of. Once I adopted you, we talked more often. That was also when she started getting bigger movie roles. She would send me money for you. For clothes, your schooling, anything you needed, she was right there to support.”
Janna had always wondered how Mama Adel was able to afford her private school. And this information explained why they’d been able to move into a four-bedroom, two-bathroom house in one of the nicer neighborhoods in Edison.
Janna’s chest tightened. She had always thought that Iris and Macy had been sending money to help with the household expenses. Now the more she thought about it, the more other things started to make sense.
“Baby, I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you, but Phoenix asked me not to. So please understand, just because she wasn’t there for you in the flesh every day, you were never far from her thoughts.”
“I don’t know what to say.” All these years she thought that Phoenix had given her away and hadn’t looked back.
Nausea swept through her body as everything she’d said to Phoenix the night before came flooding back.
“Oh, Mama, I really put my foot in it this time. You wouldn’t believe some of the things I said to her.”
Her mother chuckled. “Actually, knowing how you felt about her, I can just about imagine.”
“I have to fix this.”
“Yes, you do.”
Shortly after ending the call, Janna found Austin sitting in the living room watching SportsCenter. It was months into their long-distance relationship and they’d gotten into a comfortable routine. Austin made the trip to New York at least two or three times per month, since his schedule was more flexible than hers.
Janna stood back and observed him, loving how relaxed he seemed in her space. This was what she wanted—them together forever, but preferably living under one roof. She had often dreamed of what it would be like to have a family of her own, even more so after Iris and Macy married. What would it be like if she and Austin were to marry and have a few children?
Austin turned slightly and their gazes met. “Hey. Is everything all right?”
“Well, that depends on your definition of all right.”
She moved across the room and plopped down next to him. Tucking her legs underneath herself, she snuggled next to him and told him about the conversation with her mother.
“There was something I realized while talking to Mama Adel.”
“What’s that?”
“I’m a hypocrite. I’ve been so busy punishing Phoenix for leaving me for her career that I didn’t realize I had done the same thing to you.”
Austin remained quiet. Janna assumed he had already thought the same thing. How could she have not seen it sooner? She could argue that the situations were different, but ultimately she’d put her career before the man she loved.
“I owe both you and Phoenix an apology.”
“You don’t owe me anything, Janna.” Her head was resting on Austin’s shoulder and she looped her arm through his. “We agreed months ago to put the past behind us and start fresh. Besides, after seeing you in action during your photo shoots and the fashion show, you made the right decision. You were born to be a model and I’m proud that you grabbed hold of the opportunity.”
She lifted her head. “But it was at the expense of what we had.”
“I know, but we got a second chance. Let’s not look back.” He dropped his arm from around her. “Now, what are you going to do about your moth— I mean, Phoenix?”
“I’m not totally sure. There’s a short video clip floating around with me and Phoenix arguing and there were witnesses who said they heard her say she was my mother. Nelson is working with my publicist and has been in contact with Phoenix’s people to determine how to spin all of this.
”
“Yeah, I get that, but before you and Phoenix go public with anything, you need to have a conversation with her. The two of you have to make peace and decide what type of relationship you want.”
“I know,” she moaned. “I just don’t know what I’ll say to her. She’s been trying to reconcile for the last couple of years. Though I’m still a little peeved about how she left me, I feel awful about how I’ve treated her.”
“Well, how about this? How about if I cook dinner and you invite her over here?”
Janna’s heart swelled. “You would do that for me?”
“Sweetheart, do you have any idea how much I love you? There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”
Janna’s heart rate kicked up and she thought the organ would explode in her chest. She’d never thought she would ever hear Austin utter those words again.
“I love you, too.”
He lowered his head and kissed her sweetly. All the anxiousness and doubt she had been feeling drifted away like a feather in the wind. She felt like the luckiest woman in the world, but then Austin halted their kiss way before she was ready.
He caressed her cheek with the back of his fingers. “Besides, cooking dinner for two very beautiful women would be my pleasure.”
Janna grinned and then sobered. “Thank you...for everything. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t been here with me.”
“You would’ve been fine, but I am glad I was here.” He stretched his long arms up and yawned. “Okay, so I guess we should make a move. If you can get Phoenix over here, you’ll be able to apologize to her on your turf, away from prying eyes. Except for the ton of media camped outside the building, that is. They’ll see her come in, assuming she’ll show, but at least your conversation will be private.”
Hours later, Janna paced near the kitchen counter, where Austin was putting the finishing touches on a tossed salad.
“Would you relax?” He reached out and pulled her close. “Everything is going to be fine.”
Model Attraction Page 13
