Legacy: Letters from eminent parents to their daughters

by Menon, Sudha

  I am often asked how I have been able to balance work and home simultaneously. I will admit that it has been a tough, sometimes exhausting, but extremely satisfying journey for me. Often, I would make it happen by giving up on sleep and on my ‘me’ time, tending to all the things that needed to be done so that my home functioned well even while I was at work.

  While working hard for my career, I looked after my family, been there for my mother and in-laws when they needed me around. They reciprocated in kind with their unconditional love and support for my career. Remember that relationships are important and have to be nurtured and cherished. Also keep in mind that a relationship is a two-way street, so be ready to give to a relationship just as you would expect the other person to be giving to you.

  My career would not have progressed the way it did were it not for the support of your father who never once complained about the time I spent away from home. Your father and I nurtured our relationship despite the fact that we were both busy with our own careers, and I am confident you will do the same with your partner, when the time comes. If you had complained and whined about my extended absence from home, I would never have had the heart to make a career for myself. I am blessed with a great and supportive family and I really hope you too will be as fortunate when you set out on your own!

  I remember the day your Board exams were about to commence. I had taken a leave from work so that I could take you to the examination hall myself. When you realized I was coming, you told me how you were used to going for your exams alone for so many years. It hurt me to hear you say that, but I also think in some ways, having a working mother made you much more independent from a very young age itself. You not only became independent, but also stepped into the nurturer’s role for your younger brother and never let him miss my presence. As you grew up, I learnt to have trust and faith in you and you have now grown into a wonderful, independent woman. I now use the same principle at work to make our growing population of younger talent take on larger responsibilities. I believe in fate, but I also believe that hard work and diligence plays a very important role in our lives. I would not leave everything to destiny. In fact, I believe that in a larger sense we all write our own destiny. Take your destiny in your hands, dream of what you want to achieve, and write it in your own way. As you go ahead in life, I want you to climb the path to success one step at a time. Aim for the sky but move slowly, enjoying every step along the way. It is all those little steps that make the journey complete. When I became the Managing Director and CEO of ICICI in 2009, it was a great milestone for me. But when I started my career and the length of my training period was reduced from twelve months to nine in 1984 owing to my good performance, it was a source of great satisfaction for me at that time! So, enjoy every step of your journey.

  As you go forward, you will sometimes have to take difficult decisions, decisions that others might scorn. But you must have the courage to stand up for what you believe in. Over the last three years, I have made considerable changes at ICICI Bank to de-risk the balance sheet and position it for sustainable, profitable growth. In the initial period, this meant actually consolidating operations, slowing down growth, and re-looking at some business models that were not doing well. It was a difficult thing to do, but for me the ability to do it came from the confidence of knowing that I had done my homework, analyzed the issue, and figured out what was the right thing to do in the context of what was happening around us. Aarti, this is something I want you to remember—make sure you have the conviction to do what you know is right, and once you have that conviction, don’t let sceptics distract you from your path.

  I am often asked what gives me satisfaction. To me, ‘satisfaction’ means giving my best effort to everything I do, doing it not just to the best of my ability, but in the best way it could have been done. Excel in everything that you are doing, Aarti, and apply this to every part of your life—your home, relationships, and everything else that is either a duty, a desire, or an obligation.

  Aarti, there is no limit to what a determined mind can achieve, but in achieving your goal, don’t compromise on the values of fair play and honesty. Don’t cut corners or compromise to achieve your dreams. Remember to be sensitive to the feelings of the people around you and don’t forget to be diligent about your work. And remember, if you don’t allow stress to overtake you, it will never become an issue in your life.

  As a young woman stepping out into the world, I wish for you to dream your own dreams, aspire for something big, and create your own goals. Remember that good times and bad times will be part of your life equally, and you have to learn to handle both with equanimity. Excel in everything that you do, make the most out of life’s opportunities and learn from every opportunity and challenge that life brings along.

  Lovingly yours,

  Mumma

  Deep Anand

  y his own admission, Deep Anand, Chairman of the Rs 50 billion Anand Automotive Group, raised his only daughter, Anjali, to be the ‘puttar’ or son of the family. The little girl that came into the lives of the Anand couple after almost two decades of their marriage, brought renewed joy and meaning into their lives.

  The couple, however, decided that their daughter would stand a better chance at being a global citizen if she went to residential school abroad. They saw it as an opportunity for her to make new friends, learn about new cultures, and share her blessings with others.

  At the young age of 27, Deep Anand established his first business venture in the year 1961, setting up the group’s flagship company, Gabriel India, which manufactured shock absorbers. Decades later, his daughter Anjali Anand Singh, mother of twins, is waiting in the wings to take over the empire.

  Back from her wanderings around the world, which included a Masters in Fine Arts from Central St. Martins and a Business Management degree from the University of Westminster, Anjali Singh, however, remained restless and unfulfilled with her father’s business and eventually set out on her own, setting up luxury resorts in India’s rural outback. She is as proud of The Serai, a luxury tent resort in the Thar desert and Sher Bagh, an eco-resort situated in India’s tiger belt of Ranthambore, as she is of her pair of twins.

  Now in his late seventies, Deep Anand continues to be the energetic, restless young man that he was when he went about the task of establishing enduring global partnerships with leading automotive component companies from around the world. While the history of Indian companies and their global partnerships is replete with examples of failed relationships and bitter separations, the Anand Group today has 13 joint ventures and 7 technical licenses, all which have withstood the pressures of doing business in what has been a roller coaster ride in uncertain economic terrains. The group has since then become the subject of management studies on establishing long-term business partnerships.

  In the fifty years that he has invested into the company, the group has grown to be a much admired entity, with 8 companies spread across 49 locations and 9 states in the country and a separate vertical operating in the Luxury Hospitality segment which was started by Anjali.

  The key to his success has been his belief that it is people who make organizations what they are. Over the last few decades, he has honed and perfected the ability to take on board people from diverse backgrounds, with a diversity of beliefs and thoughts, to steer his conglomerate to success. ‘Business is 90% people’, he told me several times during our multiple meetings. The Anand Group employs over 13,000 people across its various locations and offices. The group lays great emphasis on the development of its employees through training programmes conducted by its in-house technical and management institute—Anand ‘U’.

  The young man who came from Lahore with a heart full of dreams studied Mechanical Engineering at the Chippenham College of Technology, UK, and started his career in 1954 as a Plant Manager with Mahindra & Mahindra in Mumbai.

  When his father wanted him to go the regular route and be content with a small business of his own, he
stood his ground and relentlessly chased his ambitions till he struck pay dirt. He continues to be the face of the group, travelling and striking up relationships around the globe, for the company’s growth.

  When he is not busy with work, Anand retires to his many homes around the country. I met him at his sprawling farmhouse by a river on the outskirts of Pune, with a few hundred mango trees, a swimming pool that he shares with wild ducks, and fruit and vegetable orchards that make the place a self-sufficient abode. During the course of our meeting, he showed me around the place in an all-terrain-vehicle with child-like delight while I hung on for dear life in the back seat.

  Anand is also an avid reader and golf player who used to enjoy shooting game. He raised Anjali in their farmhouse in Delhi where she had the company of horses and spent her days collecting bird eggs and bonding with nature.

  ‘I brought her up as my Puttar but today, I must confess that I feel the boundless joy of having a daughter. It is such a pleasure to have a daughter. She is more forgiving, caring, and more than generous in reciprocating your affection,’ Anand told me about Anjali.

  Dear Anjali,

  Over the last three decades that your mother and I have been blessed with your presence in our lives, the one thing about you that has continuously kept us captivated is your endless diversity, your unlikely interests, and your boundless spirit.

  We are not sure where you got it from. Your mother says you got it from me because I myself was quite a wayward child who refused to be reined in. But we are sure the years of living on your own, from the age of ten when you went off to Aiglon College—a British-based boarding school in Switzerland—has a lot to do with the gifted young lady that you have grown up to be.

  It was difficult for us to send you away to boarding because we were blessed with you after 19 years of marriage. However, having studied in boarding schools ourselves, your mom and I knew that the bonding that takes place with other kids in that environment makes for lifelong friends. The essential virtues of learning to give and take come easily when you are in boarding, sharing a dormitory with other children. Your mom and I were sure we did not want you to lead a charmed existence at home. Aiglon College in that sense was perfect. Your pride and spirit surfaced when your Humpty-Dumpty figure made you the target of teasing; but instead of buckling, you decided to dig your heels in and stay your ground. The teasing, in fact, seemed to have worked positively for you because you had proved to yourself that you were capable of much more, and went on to become Head girl of junior school at 14 and of senior school at 16. Before finally leaving Aiglon, you had made friends from some 40 countries, which in itself is quite remarkable.

  Dear Anjali, that spirit has endured to this day. I still remember my amazement, and regret too, when I realized that instead of pursuing the Business Management degree that I thought you were going to take up in London, you had instead gone on to enroll yourself for a Masters in Arts at the prestigious St. Martins. Your heart was set on pursuing your passion for arts but you knew that I wanted you to study economics so that you could take interest in my business and take it to greater heights. But that did not dampen your spirits. You took your mother into confidence and for years you studied Arts during the day and pursued an evening course in Business Management at Westminster College, without me knowing what you were up to! And when I did find out, I had nothing but admiration for you.

  Darling, when you came back to India at the age of 26, after 14 years of staying abroad, you were friendless and perhaps lonely here, but I am glad those times have passed and you have not just found yourself a splendid life partner in Jaisal but also given birth to a pair of infants, who you will raise, I am sure, with the same maturity with which you have handled yourself.

  I know it has not been easy for you to integrate yourself with my business but it has been very satisfying to see you apply your sense of intuition into it and learn from your colleagues and all the people who have helped me build the enterprise. You have proved that you are no dreamer with your head in the clouds but a down-to-earth woman with your head on your shoulders and feet on the ground.

  Anjali, you have spent the last 4 years intermittently following your own passions—painting, writing, photography, and setting up home with your life partner. As you now take on the responsibility of raising your infant children, balancing the competing demands of marriage, two sets of in-laws, motherhood, and business will be another challenge. Especially since you will manage the business, the demands on your time and intellect will be many. I personally am of the view that a woman is much stronger than a man. When it comes to tough decisions, a woman is able to withstand pressure better than her male colleagues. It is not just raising the child, the process of birthing itself gives strength that most men do not possess. A woman is in several ways tougher.

  I’m sure you have grown up hearing of my own childhood in Lahore/Shimla and our relocating to Independent India. My father and grandfather had a flourishing business in Lahore but when we reached Shimla, we had to give up most of our landed wealth. My father was a stern man, very hard to please, and he did not expect that I would do much good in life. My father wanted me to take up a job or any small venture and be content with it for life, but I had a bigger dream. In some ways, I think that was why I worked doubly hard all my life, especially in the beginning, building up the auto component business that has today grown into a billion dollar enterprise with operations across continents. Did I ever think I would achieve so much success that I would employee 15,000 people and have homes in several cities and hill stations of India? No. But I did have a dream in my heart and the desire to turn it into a reality.

  I started with the automobile industry when it was in its infancy in India and that gave me a head start over the Americans, the Japanese, the Koreans, the French, and the Germans who arrived in India in this space. I remained miles ahead of them, leading a diversified group with over a dozen joint-venture partners across the world.

  Darling, I believe discontentment drives us. That is what drove me to grow a small enterprise into one of the biggest names in the automotive industry and help it expand to different corners of the country. Complacence kills enterprise. When I’m content, I am most frustrated. You are just like that my child. Multitasking comes easily to you and I am warmed at the thought that you too, like me, will work ceaselessly for a dream.

  And yet, you are different and you have a mind of your own. I was taken aback and a little concerned when, on your return to India, you balked at the idea of working with me and of living with your mom and me. You told me you tried and that you did not think it was motivating enough. You wanted to live on your own, follow your own dictates, and set up luxury resorts with your husband Jaisal, in the beautiful outback of our country. I may have faced some extent of despondency but I knew that over time, you would understand the value of what I created—Rs 5000 crore in revenue and 15,000 people working for the group did not come easily and I know you will appreciate it better.

  ‘It will be different,’ you tell me, Anjali, when I suggest that you do things my way. I have got used to that and come to respect your stand on shared responsibility.

  However, I do know that the values you learnt while we raised you won’t be different, because that is the essential part of a child’s upbringing, the legacy that a parent can leave for his or her children.

  My dear, remember the time you first told me that you wanted to expand your own venture and set up luxury resorts? I was a little despondent at first but I decided to set you free because I knew that in order for me to make you buy into any kind of business sense, it was important to allow you to follow a business that you loved. And I must say you did a splendid job, developing your first resort, a 100-acre luxury property, ‘The Serai’, in the heart of Rajasthan’s desert land, toiling hard to get the project going, even with limited resources.

  And when you found yourself running short of resources to grow and keep your business afloat, I was happy to
have your business become part of the Anand Group, even though an auto component and engineering business has little in common with luxury resorts! I was glad when you saw the logic in agreeing to my suggestion since it gave you access to the manpower that we train within the group and also to the funds that our business can put into your project. Trained manpower is one of the biggest assets to any venture and I am glad you saw the opportunity and seized it. In some ways, that has also brought you closer to the business that I want you to eventually oversee.

  Two years back when your mother had to fly to London for surgery, you did a wonderful job standing in for me as Chairperson of the Supervisory Board of the group. You surprised everyone with how well you conducted yourself, took control of the meeting, and managed exceedingly well on your own. I was happy at your level of maturity and how you managed the egos of senior executives, most of who have been with the group for decades.

  I don’t know where this ability of yours came from but I am beginning to think it’s got something to do with your involvement in art. It has made me re-look what I thought about your decision to pursue art as a career. Maybe the process of painting is definitive, there is a method to the madness. You tell me occasionally: ‘Dad, you go all over the place when you talk. It is important to be precise and to the point.’ I agree, now.

  Anjali, the early years of your childhood was spent in the company of your grandmother, who brought you up gently but firmly, and you imbibed from her the Sikh way of life and grew up to be a caring woman who respects her elders and is concerned about their well-being.

  It brings me to the point of one of my own biggest assets in running my enterprise. At 27, when I decided to branch out on my own, I was never left floundering.