Shattered Souls

by Mary Lindsey

  His hair was still wet, and he was in a black long-sleeved T-shirt and tattered blue jeans. His feet were bare. Casual. Comfortable. Gorgeous.

  I hadn’t felt this calm in ages. My body almost hummed with peace.

  “You’re better,” he said as he handed me a cup of chocolate.

  I took the cup and wrapped my fingers around it, knocking off the last bit of chill. “Yeah, I feel a lot better. Bogeybaby was hassling me when you pulled up.”

  He smiled and put the pot in the sink. “Ah, that explains it. I thought maybe you were having boyfriend troubles.”

  “No, we’re fine. Fantastic, in fact.”

  His smile faded. “Glad to hear it.”

  I took a sip of chocolate. It was rich and delicious. He was right—compared to this, the powdered stuff Mom and I made at home was disgusting. “Is that your Cinderella hairbrush in the bathroom?”

  Alden laughed. “No. That belongs to my sister, Elizabeth. She’s four.” He walked into the next room and plopped down on a sofa.

  I followed him and sat in an overstuffed chair. “Where’s she?”

  He set his cup down on the coffee table. “Early learning center.”

  I looked around the large family room. It could have been the cover shot for an interior design magazine. The back of the room was a wall of French doors accented with floral drapes that puddled into folds of fabric on the floor. No doubt his parents were loaded. “This is a great house. What do your parents do?” I asked.

  “Doctors. Mom’s an oncologist, and Dad’s a general surgeon.” He put his feet up on the coffee table. “I won the parent lottery this time.” Spook jumped in his lap. “I hope it’s okay I brought you here instead of your house. When this storm stops, I’ll take you home.”

  “No. This is fine.”

  Alden scratched the dog behind the ear, and she made an oof oof sound.

  “Spook is a funny name,” I said.

  “Yeah. She senses Hindered. Spooks drive her nuts. I got her when I was away at school.”

  I put my feet on the coffee table too. I figured since he was doing it, it was okay. “Where did you go to school?”

  “Wilkingham Military Academy. It’s actually just a cover for a Protector training facility that’s run by the Intercessor Council.” Spook climbed off his lap and padded in circles on the sofa cushion next to him and settled down with her head on his thigh. “When I was fourteen years old, I got a letter telling me I’d earned a scholarship, and my parents let me go. The brochure was slick, and they bought into it completely. I knew exactly what it was, of course. I’d already begun having memories of my past lives.”

  I finished off my chocolate and set the cup on the coffee table. “So if I were normal . . . or rather appropriately abnormal, I would have started having past life memories when I was younger?”

  He nodded.

  “I wish I could remember. This is driving me crazy.”

  “You and me both.” Spook grumbled when Alden stood and picked up our cups.

  I followed him into the kitchen. “Do Speakers go to school?”

  “No. Speakers go through an apprenticeship their first few cycles under an experienced mentor. From then on, their job pretty much stays the same generation after generation. It’s not affected by technology like my job is.” He set the cups in the sink and ran water into them.

  I leaned on the granite counter next to him. “What kind of technology?”

  “Medicine is totally different each cycle. Things were pretty rough before antibiotics and sterilization. My past life memories don’t help me with that. School gets me up to speed with the era’s advances. Laws change too. I can’t just run around with a sword strapped to my hip anymore, much as I’d like to.” He winked and pulled out a sponge from under the sink.

  “So, are you going back there?”

  He squirted soap on the sponge and scrubbed the cups and pan. “No. I’ve been released for duty. Now my parents think I’m so brilliant, the school has allowed me to do a correspondence course by computer.” He rinsed the dishes and set them in a drain rack next to the sink.

  “So, the academy is where you learned to be Ghost Boy.”

  He smiled. “Yes, Ghost Boy and Doctor Boy. Let me see your stitches.”

  I put my hands over my abdomen. “Why?”

  He groaned. “Come on, Lenzi. . . . I put them there. Get over it. I need to be sure there isn’t an infection starting up. It’s just your stomach. It’s not like I haven’t seen it before.”

  That last little bit irked me. How much of my—No. How much of Rose’s body had he seen, and in what context?

  He groaned again.

  “Fine.” If he wanted to play doctor, I could go with that. I had to lift my shirt almost to my bra to expose the scratches because they extended so high on my abdomen.

  He leaned closer, running his fingers along either side of the sutures. His gentle touch caused my heart to race and the cut to ache. I winced. He pulled my shirt down and straightened up. “It’s a little red. You need some antibiotics, and I need to treat it. I’ll be right back, okay?”

  “Okay.” I gripped the edge of the counter. Treat it how? I’d always been terrified of all things medical and this home-doctoring routine was no exception. His emotion-feeling stuff must have kicked in because he stopped at the base of the stairs.

  “Lenzi, it’ll be fine. I know what I’m doing. You need to trust me.”

  I nodded.

  He returned from upstairs with a cardboard pack of giant pills and a small vial of clear liquid. After punching the first two capsules through the foil on the bottom of the pack, he placed them in my hand. “Here, take both of these antibiotics now and follow the schedule on the inside for the rest.” He pulled a bottle of water out of the fridge and led me to the sofa in the family room.

  I took a swig from my water bottle and swallowed the pills. He shifted the sofa cushions and had me lie down. When he sat next to me and began to pull up the bottom of my shirt, I inhaled sharply, one step short of a gasp.

  “Trust me,” he said, opening the top of the vial full of clear liquid. “That thing was demonic.”

  I nodded. He sprinkled the liquid from the vial over the wound. A small area bubbled like it was hydrogen peroxide, but it had no odor. He pulled my shirt back down and moved away.

  “What was that stuff?”

  “It was holy water. The antibiotics will fight infections with earthly causes. The holy water will kill off infections caused by evil. The Malevolent you dealt with was evil. Its wound can infect not just your body, but your soul.”

  I bit my lower lip. “Am I going to get sick?”

  “Not a chance.”

  I stood. “Alden, I’m really not cut out for this kind of thing. I’m not made for bogeymen and stitches and evil spirits and—”

  He placed his hands on my shoulders. “Stop! We had a deal. You said you’d give it a try. Just once, remember?”

  Tears filled my eyes, and I trembled. Alden pulled me into his arms and held me against his chest. “Just once, Lenzi. You can do this.”

  He smelled delicious, like rain and chocolate, and his embrace was so right. I wrapped my arms around him and closed my eyes. I wasn’t addicted to Xanax, but I could certainly become addicted to Alden.

  Still clinging to him, I drew a ragged breath. “I’d better let Mom know where I am, though. She’ll freak if I’m not home when she calls to check on me.”

  He opened his arms, and reluctantly, I stepped out of his warmth. I went to the kitchen, pulled my cell phone out of my purse, and texted Mom. A message from Zak came through as I was putting my phone away. He wanted me to come see him play again tonight. I could still feel the warmth of Alden’s embrace as I texted Zak that I couldn’t make it. I took a deep breath and turned my phone off. Alden was right. I’d made a deal to give being a Speaker a shot, and I needed to carry through with it.

  When I returned to the family room, I found Alden just outside the
open French door. The rain had stopped, and he was standing with his back to me, looking out over a small, landscaped yard—well, more of a courtyard, really, with a tiny sparkling pool and ornate fountain. He had his hands on his hips, and Spook was sitting at his bare feet.

  “Alden,” I said softly. “You’ll have to cut me some slack. I’m really new at this.”

  He remained facing away. “It’s hard to play follow-the-leader when the leader doesn’t know where she’s going. I’m spoiled. It’s usually so easy to predict your needs and follow you. I’m not being very helpful. I apologize.”

  “Teach me how to deal with the bogeymen. I don’t want to be attacked by a Malevolent again.”

  He studied my face. All business. The calm tutor.

  “That’s a good start,” he said. “Keep telling me what you need. That’s the essence of this relationship. I’m here to help you. You are the real power. Only you can hear the Hindered. Only you can help them. Let’s start there, okay? Are they talking to you now?” He shoved his hands in his jean pockets.

  I sat on the concrete surround of the fountain. “No.”

  “Let them.”

  “How?”

  He sat next to me. “Listen. They’re always there, waiting for you to listen. Really powerful ones will break through regardless. If the timing is bad, just tell them to go away. They’re persistent, but usually they’ll obey you. The one in Kemah was rare and unfortunate. It was my fault, really. I should never have left you alone untrained.”

  I shifted to face him. “Alden. That’s ridiculous. I told you to go away and leave me alone. How could that possibly be your fault?”

  “Rules. There are rules. Clear, concise, concrete rules. It is my duty to inform, protect, and serve the Speaker. I facilitate your success. That’s why I exist. If you don’t get tough soon, the Intercessor Council is going to wonder what’s wrong.”

  He stood and paced along the edge of the pool. “No offense, but your little hundred-year vacation caused some trouble. We did our best to cover the region, but with you gone, we got pretty backed up around here.”

  “Do all people who die become Hindered?”

  “No. Only those with unresolved issues. Most souls just move on.”

  “Issues like my dad had?”

  He stopped pacing, but said nothing. He just stared at me with those clear gray eyes.

  “What if Dad is out there somewhere? I could talk to him. Tell him good-bye. Ask him why—”

  Alden put his hands on my shoulders. “He’s gone, Lenzi.”

  My chest ached. “But he killed himself. Obviously he had issues.”

  He shook his head. “Perhaps they weren’t issues that kept him Earth-bound. Maybe they were internal within himself or maybe his death solved his problems. Not all suicide victims become Hindered.”

  The thought of being with Dad again, even as a ghost, made my heart speed up. “What if he was, though? Couldn’t he still be out there somewhere?”

  “Very few spirits linger, Lenzi. He would have contacted you by now if he were still here. Family bonds have a strong pull.” I could tell it was hard for Alden to discuss this with me. He spoke slowly and carefully. “He died several months ago. You hadn’t emerged as a Speaker yet. If he had been Earth-bound, he would have approached the nearest Speaker, and there isn’t a record of that. I checked. Chances are, he just moved on without needing help.” He released my shoulders and flipped the hair out of his eyes. “I’m sorry, Lenzi.”

  I sat on the edge of the fountain and ran my fingertips in the cool water. Knowing Dad was at peace made me feel a little better.

  He stopped within a few feet of me and met my eyes directly. “You okay?”

  I nodded.

  “If you’re up to it, we really need to get to work now.”

  “Okay,” I said, willing my heart rate to slow. The way he looked at me made me uncomfortable—as if he could see inside me. “You want me to call out a Hindered?”

  “That would be a good start, if you feel up to it. But it’s not really about what I want, is it?”

  I rolled my eyes. I hated the hierarchy involved with this. I wanted a friend, not a subordinate. “Alden, stop with the minion crap. Can’t you just be my friend?”

  “I’ll be whatever you want me to be. Define my role and begin doing your job.”

  “I want you to be my friend, Alden. I need a friend.”

  His expression didn’t change. “A friend it is. Let’s do this first resolution in the living room.”

  “Great.” At least he wasn’t just going to act like he should be my servant anymore.

  Alden made Spook stay outside so she wouldn’t bark and growl at the Hindered the whole time.

  We sat on the sofa.

  “Okay, Lenzi, you should focus on one voice at a time. Pick the one that’s most persistent because it will calm the others down to get rid of the troublemaker. As long as you’re resolving problems for them, the Hindered should remain peaceful. Call me if you need me because I can’t hear what’s going on in your body. I can feel the fear, but I’m not allowed to enter the vessel unless invited. Remember to ask me in when it’s time for the extra soul to leave. My entrance alone will dislodge them. The vessel can’t accommodate three souls for long. The weakest one is forced out. Malevolent are an entirely different situation, but don’t worry about that right now.

  “Make it easy this first time,” he advised. “Pick one that can clearly define its needs.”

  I tucked up into a ball and hugged my knees. I was terrified, but didn’t want Alden to know. I wanted him to think that I was brave and tough. I wanted to impress him—like Rose did.

  FOURTEEN

  I closed my eyes and concentrated on singling out a Hindered. It was easy, really. The bogeybaby, who told me her name was Suzanne, started whining at me right away.

  “Okay, I’ve got one,” I said, stifling a nervous giggle. Alden grinned. “What’s funny?”

  “I sound like I’m trying to land a fish!”

  “Well, reel it in, Captain Ahab!”

  “I don’t know how,” I mumbled.

  “Invite it in. It’ll give you a clear picture of what it wants. Let me know if it gives you any trouble, and I’ll help you.”

  A jolt of panic shot through me.

  “It’s okay, Lenzi. I’m right here. Go ahead. You’ll know what to do.”

  I felt like a little kid about to jump off of the diving board for the first time. I reached over and took Alden’s hand. I needed his magic calm-down thing. Instead, his touch delivered a type of electric shock that caused my entire body to tingle and buzz with energy. What the heck? I looked over at him. “What’s going on?”

  “I . . . um . . . It’s complicated. Give me a moment.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The current running up my arm dimmed and mellowed into that peaceful hum I’d experienced when he touched me before. I knew for sure now that he was doing it on purpose.

  “What is that, Alden? Are you doing that intentionally?”

  “Yes and no.” He took a deep breath. “Yes, I am doing that intentionally, but I’m having trouble controlling it. I’m pretty young this cycle, and it’s harder to keep it together. You’re feeling what I want you to feel. You’re also sometimes feeling what I’m experiencing myself. As I get older, I’ll be able to mask my own emotions completely and gift you with what you need. As I said, you came four years earlier than usual, and you took my hand before I was ready.”

  I stared at him for a moment, baffled. “So what exactly was that?”

  “It was . . . well, it was what I was feeling at the time.”

  “Which is what?” When it appeared he wasn’t going to answer, I pushed harder. “You told me your job was to inform the Speaker. Well, I’m the Speaker, so inform.”

  He fidgeted and then ran his hands through his hair. “Okay. Your fear is a turn-on. Protectors are stimulated when their Speakers are afraid. It’s what makes it possible to put you in h
arm’s way. Otherwise, our instinct to protect would trump everything and we’d never allow you to do your job, which is to put yourself in danger in order to resolve the issues that keep the Hindered Earth-bound.”

  Well, that certainly wasn’t what I expected. “Get out! You’re turned on by fear?”

  “And pain to some extent.” He winked and pulled his hand away.

  I turned on the sofa to face him. “That’s totally sick. Whose pain?”

  “It’s irrelevant.” He made a shooing motion with his hand.

  I gave him my best imitation of Mom’s glare. “Whose pain, Alden?”

  He leaned back and put his arms across the back of the sofa. “Isn’t there a Hindered waiting for you, Captain Ahab?”

  “Help me, please! You have to help me.” Bogeybaby sounded frantic.

  “Fine. Ghost time, but we’re not finished with this discussion.” I turned my head to where the voice was. “Okay, Suzanne. I’ll help you now.”

  “Tell her she can enter the vessel,” Alden prompted.

  “You can enter and tell me what you need me to do, Suzanne,” I said as I took Alden’s hand again. This time his touch was reassuring.

  I cried out as the Hindered entered my body. I hadn’t thought about the pain involved, or I’d have braced myself for it. Fortunately, it only lasted a second. A jolt from Alden jumped up my arm. Well, that answered my question—my pain. Fantastic.

  “The worst part is over, Lenzi. You did great. Is she talking to you?”

  I nodded as the little girl went on and on in a loud shrill voice about her sister and a cat and a Christmas tree and shots and needles and dying. I could barely understand her. “She wants to tell her sister something.” I kept my eyes on Alden. “She wants to give her something. Oh, no, Alden. She’s talking too fast!”

  “She’s just a person without a body, Lenzi. Tell her to slow it down. You’re in control. Tell her what to do.”

  It was too much. Suzanne was getting louder and talking faster. I stood up and put my hands on either side of my head. “I can’t do it, Alden. I need her to get out.”

  He stood and pulled my hands away from my ears, holding me by my shoulders. “No. Lenzi. Listen to me. Are you listening? Tune her out and focus on my voice only.” I nodded and he continued. “You are in control of this situation. The Hindered need you. You must take charge. Be strong. Do you hear me?”