Lifeline

by Susan X Meagher

  Mia got up and sat next to her friend, sharing the edge of the chaise. "Jamie, I’m really sorry if I let you get high when you didn’t want to. I thought you knew what I meant when I asked if he used cannabutter."

  "Mia, I’ve smoked grass about six times in my life. I had no idea what you were talking about. What in the heck were you talking about, anyway?"

  "Oh, that’s a way to make things that get you high without tasting terrible. You cook up some grass with water and butter, and strain it and cool it, and then you skim the butter off. It leaves an aftertaste, but nothing like trying to cook with it by just putting chopped up grass in brownies. Those taste like they were made with a combination of sand and hay." She grimaced and shook her head. "Nasty stuff."

  Jamie reached over and wrapped her friend in a hug. "I’m not mad at you. And I did grab a bite before you had much time to warn me. But I don’t want to do this again, okay?"

  "Gotcha," she said. "I’ll go run for more lunch. We uhm … kinda ate yours."

  "Darned good idea," Ryan said.

  Jamie and Mia went off together, leaving a pensively silent Jordan and Ryan behind. "You look pissed," Ryan said.

  The blonde head shook as she said, "No, not pissed." Leaning back with her hands laced around her knee she said, "I know that Mia smokes grass once in a while … among other things." She let out a low chuckle, acknowledging that her lover was a very free spirit. "I uhm … I’d have to say that I’m more bothered by her taking the stuff from those guys." She twitched her head in the direction of the six young men who were seated close to them.

  "That’s what bothered me too," Ryan said. "I’m surprised that Jamie was that naïve. You just don’t take food from strange guys out on the beach." She shook her head and continued, "You never know when an innocent looking guy might be a real predator. They could have had those things laced with anything!"

  "No, it’s not the food thing. It’s that she was interacting with the guys like that. She’s just such a natural flirt, Ryan. I know that she’s just that way … it’s an elemental part of her personality. But guys don’t see it that way." She shook her head quickly, trying to dispel the image of Mia flirting with the men from her imagination. "I’m worried about her." She let out a plaintive sigh and said, "I told you a month ago that this was one of my biggest fears about getting involved with her. I don’t think she slutty, but she’s … very friendly. I worry that she’s gonna flirt with someone who flirts back and …" She trailed off, obviously uncomfortable with where her mental image led her.

  "Of course that’s possible," Ryan said, "but it seems unlikely to me. I still flirt, Jordan. I don’t really try to, but it’s … who I am, too. But just because I flirt doesn’t mean I’d ever do anything about it. I notice other women, but I only love Jamie, and I’ll always be completely faithful to her. I think Mia really loves you, Jordan. I don’t think she’s playing, and I don’t think she’ll betray you."

  "I hope not, Ryan," she said softly, staring at the pink sand that covered her toes. "I don’t think I could handle it if she breaks my heart."

  "I know just how you feel," Ryan said. "It’s scary to be this vulnerable with another person."

  "Scary is the word," the blonde said, flopping back onto her chaise to wait for their partners.

  Ryan looked up from the last few bites of her chowder to see a pair of vivid green eyes staring at her soup. "Want something?" she asked, sucking on the spoon tauntingly.

  "I’m still hungry," Jamie said, her gaze never leaving the bowl.

  Ryan rolled her eyes and asked, "Does somebody have the munchies?"

  The blonde head nodded slowly. "I’m already a little high," she said, not even trying to suppress the giggle that had been trying to escape. "I get a little silly," she said, her nose crinkling up in the grin that Ryan was powerless to resist.

  "I love you, no matter how silly you are, Jamers," Ryan said. "Let’s go get you a little more food."

  "Oh, God," she moaned, "I’m so hungry that I was looking to take a bite out of your tasty looking calf." Ryan rolled her eyes as her partner started to giggle again, and they headed back to the restaurant for the third time in the last hour.

  Depositing her plate onto the sand, Jamie eyed her partner speculatively and said, "Now I need dessert." Her eyes raked up and down the long body, and Ryan immediately got the message that she was the proposed snack.

  "Let’s go, stoner," the amused woman said, extending her hand to give her a boost.

  "I want some of that dessert, too," Mia said, giving Jordan the same hungry look that Ryan had just received.

  Jordan rolled her eyes and stood, helping her partner to her feet to trail behind their friends.

  When they arrived at the cottage, Ryan surprised them all by turning on the TV and flopping down at the end of the sofa. "Come over here and keep me company while I watch a little of the Rose Bowl," she said, patting her lap. "Stanford’s playing, you know. You promised your dad you’d watch."

  Jamie stood with her hands on her hips, her face betraying her incredulity. "You’d rather watch football than … me?"

  "Football’s only on for another quarter," Ryan said. "You’re here all day." She spared a charming grin at her lover, hoping that was enough to get her to comply. "Now that we’ve been together for six months I have to start taking you for granted. It’s in the rule book," she said.

  "I knew it," the blonde said. "I knew you were just bode … bid … biding your time until you could start ignoring me." She looked very pleased with herself for being able to remember the word she had been searching for, and Ryan couldn’t help but smile at her.

  Jamie lay down on her back with her head resting on Ryan’s thigh, and stared vacantly at the ceiling, trying to count the number of times that the slow moving ceiling fan revolved. Ryan placed one hand on her head and began a slow, gentle head rub, while her other hand made matching patterns on her bare belly. In seconds the smaller woman was sound asleep, not even noticing when Jordan asked loudly, "Want something to drink, Boomer?"

  "Sure," Ryan said, now able to talk in her normal tone of voice. "Got any sparkling water?"

  Jordan tossed her a bottle and sat down on the couch that rested perpendicular to Ryan’s. Mia came in from the kitchen, munching on a bag of M & M’s that she and Jamie had purchased from the liquor store the day before. "You too?" she asked, giving Jordan a cross look.

  "Just a few minutes, honey," she said. "The game’s really close."

  Giving her a scowl, Mia took up a position identical to Jamie’s, and after just a few minutes, had joined her in sleep. Jordan tilted her head slightly and gently pulled on her chin, checking to make sure she didn’t have any more candy in her mouth. "She conked out so fast I wasn’t sure she had time to swallow," she said to Ryan. "I’m amazed that they got high from one brownie. What would they be like if they’d eaten a couple of them?"

  "People don’t realize how stoned they’re getting when they ingest grass," Ryan said, shaking her head. "Have I told you about my cousin? The one who died of AIDS?"

  "Yeah. I know that you were really close," she said.

  "We were." Ryan looked down at her partner, continuing to play with her hair. "His lungs were too trashed to allow him to smoke grass, but eating magic brownies helped give him an appetite, and it killed his pain a little," she said. "I’d guess that marijuana kept him alive for at least a year longer than he would have lived if he’d relied only on legal drugs." Her face grew dark as she said, "He had some good doctors, but they dropped the ball when it came to pain relief. They were totally freaked about him becoming addicted to painkillers. Grass really helped," she said.

  "You seemed awfully pissed when you realized Jamie had taken some," Jordan said. "I thought you were just really anti-drugs."

  "No, not really," Ryan said. "Ignoring the fact that it’s illegal, I don’t think grass is any worse than alcohol if you use it in moderation. My bigger issue is with anything that changes your mood or y
our personality." She looked at Jordan with eyes full of pain as she said, "The last year of Michael’s life, he was too sick and disoriented to even know where he was. But the year before that, he was stoned much of the time. He had to be," she said quietly. "I’m happy that he got some relief, and I’m happy that he was able to eat, but that wasn’t Michael. It was nearly impossible to have a lucid conversation with him when he was high, and his wit and his observant style were completely gone. He was alive, but he wasn’t … there. Do you know what I mean?" she asked.

  "Yeah, yeah I do," the blonde said softly. "It seems like there’s a point at which you’re extending life … but is it really your life that you’re extending?"

  "Exactly," Ryan said. "You really get this, Jordan."

  "Yeah, I do," she said. "My grandfather died last year. Prostate cancer." She looked over at her friend and said, "He was the one worthwhile member of the whole group, and he was dead before he hit sixty-five."

  "I’m sorry," Ryan said.

  "Yeah, it was hard. He was being kept alive, too; and just like your cousin, he wasn’t really there any more. I was glad for him when he had a massive heart attack and died before they could try to save him."

  Ryan looked very contemplative as she said, "It seems like we’re here such a short time. Why try to dull your senses and your perceptions?"

  Jordan shrugged and said, "People have been trying to alter their consciousness since we lived in caves. I think it’s part of the human condition. I know that I’d be a mess without the high I get from endorphins."

  Ryan smiled at her and said, "Yeah, I’ve got a lot of nerve to complain about Jamie getting high. Hell, I alter my consciousness constantly. With sex, with food, with thrills, with danger seeking, with physical activity. My father says that when I was an infant, I would rock in my crib until I was in a trance. The boys used to bring their friends over to look at me like a little sideshow exhibit," she said. "Da says I wouldn’t even blink when they put their hands in my face and snapped their fingers."

  "Yeah, but those states are something you can slip out of immediately," Jordan said. "The thing I hate about drugs and alcohol is that you can’t change your mind once you’re high. I despise being altered under some arbitrary time line. Couldn’t do it," she said.

  "Have you ever smoked grass?" Ryan asked.

  "No. No interest, really. You?"

  "Huh-uh. Some of my cousins do, and my brothers have, but I couldn’t do it, either. Lord, I couldn’t do it just because of the munchies!" she said, laughing. "I’d burst!"

  When Jamie woke, her partner and Jordan were chatting softly, neither watching the television, which was now showing some syndicated show from the U.S. "Where’s the football game?" she asked slowly, smacking her dry lips together.

  "Over. Wisconsin won, by the way." Ryan checked her watch and said, "You’ve been out for more than an hour."

  "Really?" Jamie sat up and stretched, moaning a little as she said, "I feel hung over."

  "I’ll get you something to drink," Ryan said. "That’ll help."

  She came back with a pitcher of fresh lemonade, with just a hint of the fragrant local limes in it for bite. "Ooo, this is goooood," Jamie sighed.

  "What’s good?" a rough voice demanded from across the room.

  "Lemonade," Jamie said, getting up and walking over to her friend to hand her a glass. "We did good buying those lemons and limes yesterday."

  "God, this is good," Mia said, sitting up just enough to greedily gulp it down. Sitting up all the way, she gave Jordan a puzzled look. "We didn’t make love, did we?"

  "God no!" she cried. "Do I make that small an impression on you?"

  "Of course not," Mia said softly, gently patting her leg. "Every time with you rocks my world." She leaned over and kissed her, saying, "I just don’t have a real clear memory of the afternoon."

  "That’s why we didn’t make love," Jordan said. "I want you to be fully present when we touch each other."

  "Me too," she said, snuggling up into her warm embrace. Her head cocked, and she gave her a sexy grin as she informed her, "I’m present now."

  "I guess you are," the larger woman said. "Don’t worry, we’ll get right on that little item."

  "Do you guys want to have dinner together?" Ryan asked.

  "Yeah, sure," Mia said, and Jordan nodded too. "It’s okay with me if we just eat here again. I really enjoyed last night."

  "Mmm," Ryan said, "it was magical, wasn’t it?"

  "It was," Jamie said. "That works for me. I’ll have them deliver dinner again." She looked over at her partner and said, "It astounds me that you’re keeping your vow. I really think you’d be happy not to leave our room except to lie on the beach."

  "I wasn’t kidding. I need the solitude."

  "So, you’re not interested in going to the main island and participating in the body shot contest?" Mia asked. "I thought Jamie was going to talk you into it."

  "Oh, you were, were you?" Ryan asked, looking at her partner.

  "I’ve never seen anybody do body shots before," she said. "But Mia said she bet you’d be good at it."

  "Mia knows me too well," Ryan said, grinning rakishly.

  "Show me … show me," Jamie begged.

  "All right. You know I can’t say no to you. But no alcohol. I’m not in the mood to get buzzed."

  "Do you know how to do this, Jordan?" Jamie asked.

  "Yeah, I’ve seen navel shots," she said. "But I’ve never done them."

  "You can practice on me," Mia purred, giving her a very sexy grin.

  "Okay," she said, her voice a little higher than normal. "Let me watch the master first."

  Ryan shrugged, deciding that it wasn’t a bad idea to have a little racy fun. She went into the kitchen and cut a lime up into eighths, then took two shot glasses from the bar. Grabbing the saltshaker on her way out of the kitchen, she placed everything down on the coffee table. "Okay, class, the most G-rated body shot is the navel shot. Luckily, we have an adorable navel here," she tickled Jamie’s exposed visual aid, "to serve as our model." She placed a hand on her shoulder and pushed gently. "Lie down, please." Turning to her friends she said, "In a bar, you would usually do this by having the victim … I mean model … lie down across a couple of bar stools. For our purposes I choose the sofa. I happen to know that the model is very delicate and used to gentle treatment."

  "Funny," Jamie said, sticking her tongue out.

  While grabbing the pink organ and giving it a tug, Ryan said, "Okay, you usually use tequila, but I’m choosing lemonade. For the traditional method, you rub a lime around whatever piece of skin you want to lick, then sprinkle it with a little salt. I think I’ll choose the one stop meal," she said. Taking a wedge of lime she squeezed it a little and rubbed the flesh around Jamie’s sensitive navel, making sure she had it coated well. Jamie, of course, giggled throughout, making the application a little more difficult. Ryan then sprinkled just a few grains of salt onto the wet skin and poured a tiny bit of lemonade directly into the little depression.

  The smaller woman twitched and shivered, trying to stop herself from pushing her partner away. Ryan’s grin grew wider as she leaned close – so close that Jamie could feel her warm breath on her skin. "Now you lick the salt and the lime, then slurp up the shot." Twitching her eyebrows in Jamie’s direction, she did just that, letting her soft tongue caress the sensitive skin until her lover’s toes curled and her hands balled into tight fists. A few noisy sucks drew almost all of the lemonade out of the tiny human shot-glass, but Ryan was always careful to clean up after herself, and her tongue made sure there wasn’t a drop left.

  When she started to pull her head away, she realized that two hands were laced through her hair and that neither one wanted to let go. Her chin rotated so that she could gaze at her partner, and saw that Jamie’s eyes were tightly closed and her nipples were so hard that they were plainly visible through the thin fabric of her bikini top. "Like that?" Ryan asked, her voice having dropped into
a dangerously low register.

  "Ungh," the smaller woman grunted, unable to speak at the moment.

  "Your turn, Jordan," they heard Mia say. Neither Jamie nor Ryan had remembered that their friends were in the room with them, but they did their best to sit up and focus.

  Jordan blushed a little, but she hung in gamely and rubbed the lime all over Mia’s navel, one of her most sensitive spots. Dripping a little lemonade into the depression, she grasped her hips and held her down while she retrieved it. Mia was excessively ticklish around her navel, and Jordan knew the process would be like wrestling a bobcat, but she rather liked to wrestle with this particular bobcat, so she held on tight, and didn’t relinquish her hold until all of the lemonade was whisked away by her agile tongue. She finished with a flourish, snapping her teeth onto the gold hoop that pierced the sensitive skin and giving it a good tug, making Mia scream with delight.

  "Well!" Ryan sat back against the sofa, her eyes wide and a little glassy, her partner exhibiting a similar expression. "Body shot or foreplay? You be the judge!"

  "Foreplay," Mia growled, throwing her feet to the floor and grabbing Jordan’s hand. Before Jordan could echo her decision, the door to their room was firmly closed.

  "Well, that was hot," Ryan said, fanning herself quickly.

  "Ha! You think that’s hot," the blonde purred, "just wait until I get my hot little hands on you."

  "But, honey, my lesson isn’t over yet," Ryan said. "Don’t you want to see the whole gamut of body shots?"

  Jamie paused for a minute, looking at the big blue eyes that gazed at her so lovingly. "Who would say no to that?" she asked. "Instruct me, hot stuff ... in the bedroom."

  Ryan followed her compliantly. "I love a willing student," she said. "I think I’ll show you the crotch shot next. Any objections?"

  "Duh … huh?" Jamie asked. "You make me lose my rational mind when you look at me so hungrily."

  "Rationality is highly overrated," Ryan said. "For this one you have to stand … can you?"